Chapter 4

The door finally cracks open when it's already fully dark outside. At this point, I'm half asleep, dozing in bed, but as soon as that door handle twists, I am completely awake, ready to shift, to attack, to kill, to run.

The man steps inside and all my previous thoughts about attacking vanish. The man brings power with him, radiating from his skin, promising an instant death for any disobedience. I want to lower my head, to bare my neck for this strange northerner- definitely an alpha. Despite my stupid wolf instincts, I hold my head up. I won't cower.

I don't want to get up wearing only a t-shirt, so I stay sitting, ready, oh, so ready to run. I can feel my own pulse in my veins, adrenaline keeping me on the edge. Move away from the door, god damn.

The man turns the lights on and I squint my eyes, not actually daring to fully close them. I want to see his every single move.

He's wearing all black - a shirt, pants, jacket and boots. The only different colors are his ivory hair and these weird, light blue eyes. He closes the door and heads toward me. Shit, I'll have to open the door now... As he gets closer, my breath once again picks up and I am a quivering mess. He stops near the bed and towers me, threatening me with this pose. My eyes are fixed on his. I'm not afraid, my mind screams. But my stupid, weak body says different things and I lower my gaze.

He grunts in approval and suddenly my left arm is in his palms. At this point, my heart threatens to either burst out or completely stop. It's okay okay okay. One two three. Count. One two three. I'm frozen in my spot, my arm's stiff in his harsh grip.

His fingers on my skin is more than I can handle, the sickening warmth makes my stomach twist and I try to pull my hand from his grasp. He flashes his eyes on me and I can see the beast behind those icy orbs. ''Stop''. One single word and I still. I'm powerless. Scared. One two three. I will vomit right here on his bed if he won't let go. One two three, I count eagerly.

The man inspects my arm, then releases it. I guess he's checking my wounds. Then he grabs my chin, pushing it up, turning my face to one side. Now this is way over my limits.''Stop' 'I growl, loud and clear, smacking his hand away from my face, crawling to the other side of the bed, trying to put some distance between us. Stop touching stop touching.

In a second, he's in front of me again, grabbing my hair and dragging me out of the bed. The loud scream escapes my mouth as a stinging pain sears through my scalp. Then, he slams me to a wall, choking me with one hand. I hear a low whoosh and then all that I feel is the burning sting on my left cheek. I think I see stars for a second.

The growl escapes his throat ''Watch your mouth, dove''. So calm, cold. His grip then loosens and just like that, the man releases me. ''Now, be a good little wolf and stay here.'' With that, he turns around and goes to the bathroom. For a second I think I'm gonna throw up, bile rising in my throat. He will kill me.

In, out, breathe. I got this.

My two three. Count. One two three. I'm frozen in my spot, my arm's stiff in his harsh grip.

His fingers on my skin is more than I can handle, the sickening warmth makes my stomach twist and I try to pull my hand from his grasp. He flashes his eyes on me and I can see the beast behind those icy orbs. ''Stop''. One single word and I still. I'm powerless. Scared. One two three. I will vomit right here on his bed if he won't let go. One two three, I count eagerly.

The man inspects my arm, then releases it. I guess he's checking my wounds. Then he grabs my chin, pushing it up, turning my face to one side. Now this is way over my limits.''Stop' 'I growl, loud and clear, smacking his hand away from my face, crawling to the other side of the bed, trying to put some distance between us. Stop touching stop touching.

In a second, he's in front of me again, grabbing my hair and dragging me out of the bed. The loud scream escapes my mouth as a stinging pain sears through my scalp. Then, he slams me to a wall, choking me with one hand. I hear a low whoosh and then all that I feel is the burning sting on my left cheek. I think I see stars for a second.

The growl escapes his throat ''Watch your mouth, dove''. So calm, cold. His grip then loosens and just like that, the man releases me. ''Now, be a good little wolf and stay here.'' With that, he turns around and goes to the bathroom. For a second I think I'm gonna throw up, bile rising in my throat. He will kill me.

In, out, breathe. I got this.

My face is stinging and the fact that I lost some blood and didn't eat doesn't help, too. My head is dizzy from the contact with the wall and all I want to do is get the hell away from this place, away from this man.

I hear the shower starting. Focus. I'm not afraid, I keep telling myself. I am not afraid. I just need to check that damn door again. So I shoot to the entryway and press the handle. My heart flutters. This idiot forgot to lock it.

I slowly open the door just a crack and listen. No sound other than shower reaches my ears. I dare to peek outside. I know this place should be full of guards due to my unwillingness in the forest the night before, but there's no one standing outside. Well isn't today my lucky day...

I quickly step to the corridor and trying not to make a sound I reach the stairs. The house itself is kinda modern, rich, nothing like our cabins back in the village. But I waste no time inspecting the decor, all I care is my escape.

I peek around, trying to locate people, but my senses say no one else is here. Still, I go down the stairs as quietly as I can and dash to the what I think is the front door. As my hand reaches for a handle, I am slammed in the wall near me, again. I crumble to the floor, trying and failing to get some air in my lungs. This time, my head is not only dizzy - everything around me spins. A hand grabs my arm and lifts me up. I shriek as talons tear my skin, drawing blood.

''And where do you think you're going?''Calm, icy voice reaches me again. I'm still trying to catch my breath as I reply, my voice cracking ''I'm going home''.

Ah, great job, smartass. The exact words you need to say in this situation.

The hand grips me tighter and I wince. ''No, I don't think you are''.

The man finally releases my arm and I'm able to fill my lungs with air. I am still a little disoriented from the collision with the wall. He steps closer to to me and damn, I shake like a leaf trying to back away from him. His eyes darken and his palm slams the wall behind me and I flinch, turning my face away, whimpering. He is going to kill me.

He leans to me, and I can't help but whimper again, expecting another hit. My hands shoot in front of me, trying to push him away, but the man grabs them, pinning them to the wall. Then, he bends down and smells my neck.

For a minute, the world stops. The sheer dread engulfs me whole as the low growl escapes the man's chest. His back straightens so, so very slowly, his palms twitching on his sides. I think he's not very happy. I think I'm going to pee my pants. Finally, the man speaks, his voice is quiet, full of threat. Somehow this is even scarier than shouting. ''Why the fuck I can smell another male on you?''

Wait, what? I turn my head to him, confusion on my face. What is he talking about? I don't run around rubbing myself on random people. His eyes darken even more, his palms turn into fists and I can basically smell his anger. I try to brainstorm and think, I really don't want to be slapped or thrown into another wall again. ''Maybe... uh... I wear my father's jacket all the time or my brother's old sweaters, so maybe...'' I mumble.

He looks calmer now, those strange eyes getting lighter again. Thank heavens, because I really really don't want to be thrown to the wall again. He then grabs my hand and basically drags my up the stairs to the room I woke up earlier. I struggle, trying not to fall and smash my head or something.

He goes to the wardrobe, grabs something and comes back. ''Go to the shower, you look like a mess.'' Wow, thanks. You're not a damn model too. ''Then put these on.'' He throws me a bundle of clothes and pushes me towards the bathroom door. ''My mate won't run around smelling like some dirty runt.''

I don't want to anger him more, so I obediently turn around and enter the bathroom.

The bathroom is nice, with a big bath near the window, allowing me to see the starry night outside, two sinks and the shower stall, everything's white marble, only black towels and golden faucets give some color. I want to lock the door, but how nice, there is no lock.

Should I wash myself with clothes on? There's no way I will risk myself being seen all nakey nakey. I don't trust him. So I jump in the stall still with the t-shirt that I wear on and quickly rinse myself as well as I can. The way wet clothes cling to my body is disgusting, but I suck it up. I grab the shampoo and wash my hair, trying to untangle all the knots in them.

The water turns brown and then pink underneath me.

Don't look at the blood, don't look at the blood...

Red, there is a pool of red underneath me, blood spilling from his fresh wound...

Not fresh. Not his. Mine, it is only my blood.

My head spins, the floor sways. Not being able to stand in the stall anymore, I rip disgusting wet clothes off of me, grab the towel and dry myself as fast as I can. Breathe, Eira.

Normally, I am not so easily triggered. Normally, I am able to keep my inner demons at bay, locked behind the bars. But this place, the situation I'm in... My head is a mess and I need to take a better job of keeping those demons out. In and out, Eira.

That unlocked door doesn't really help, either.

I reach for the new clothes the fucker has given me - simple black underwear, black sweatpants, gray t-shirt and hoodie. Wow, what a colorful taste he has. Still trying to gain control over my overreacting body, I put my wet hair in a pony tail - maybe I'll soon have the chance to escape and free hair will only bother me.

I don't want to get out of the bathroom. I really don't. What will I do? What will he do? I've been with him for, like, 10 minutes and he has already physically hurt me. I pace around the room not being able to gather my courage to walk out. Fuck. If I won't, he will definitely come here himself. If I will... I just need not to anger him, that's it. Make him trust me, make him think that I'm powerless.

I am powerless. I did nothing that night a year ago. But maybe I can do something now.

I take a deep breath and open the door.