CHAPTER 5

The body can prepare itself for many battles during its lifetime. It is

a fighter's malleable tool which endures the fractures of bone, the

blood of cuts and the blackened skin. It heals, and your body

forgets. But the mind holds onto those scars, it does not let go and

in truth, perhaps it can never be prepared for the ordeal of war.

It is easy for your body to become strong, but the mind must break

time and time again before it can truly know the strength it takes

to fight for its life.

As I'm dragged by my bare feet in nothing but damp, sullied

clothing, a throbbing head and a swollen jaw, I begin to question

myself. My life is no longer one that can be lived precariously, and

I may have dug my own grave by challenging Raegan, but Sage

was right. The Pantera may be savage brutes with little to no

morals, but they are opportunists. If I can prove that I am more

use to them alive than dead, I could be spared.

There's a freshness to the air, a cool bite foreign to the hot,

clamminess I've grown accustomed to this summer. As I'm pulled

to the light across rocky surfaces I realise that we are not

underground, but in a mountain. Weakness infiltrates my body, it

travels along my bloodstream and corrupts every fibre of my being.

The scent of dirt, rock and the smallest tendril of salt wraps

around my nostrils and caresses my senses. There is a sharpness

to my vision that wasn't there before the Change. I can almost feel

every living organism around me, as if their mere existence has

become a tangible thing.

The sensation is both alien and familiar. This body of mine is

entirely different, I have become the Kadence Riley I never would

have imagined, in a life not even my darkest nightmare could

create. Yet every instinct and every whispering message in my

subconscious tells me that it feels natural. I am strong even when

I am weak, and stronger in the weakness of others.

The sun is four hours from dipping beneath the horizon and into

the sea. There's a blazing heat that kisses my skin before it's

licked away by the chill of the wind. I see the faint resemblance of

Raegan in the distance, standing near the edge of the rocky

mountain along with others I haven't seen before.

"You're a stupid idiot," Orla retorts as she gives me an extra shove.

"As opposed to what, a smart idiot?" I say. Godric chuckles, and

Orla crashes her shoulder into mine until I stub my toe on a rock.

Gritting my teeth and ignoring the jarring pain, I mutter incoherent

cusses beneath my breath. Even if I do manage to beat Raegan

and become one of the Pantera, I can't say they'll be all too

pleased when they find Orla strangled in her sleep. I don't feel

guilty for deriving sinister pleasure in that image.

We reach the battle ground and eyes bore into my forehead. I can

feel their judgement and intrigue burning a hole inside of me, but I

don't sacrifice a single second absorbing any of their faces.

Instead my focus lies on Raegan, his torso free of clothing and

olive skin glistening with sweat under the sunlight. Soft muscles

coat his body, his broad shoulders and slim waist would suggest

he's a strong swimmer. He won't have the same strength as Sage,

but he'll move with a speed and grace to challenge my own.

I try to tell myself the reason I can't tear my eyes away from him is

because I'm sizing him up as a fighter, calculating his skills and

tactics, evaluating my own. It's not. What's captured my interest is

the cold, somber expression spread across his face. The shutters

of his eyes remain slammed down, barricaded. But I see the

thousands of thoughts and memories buried in depths of his

pupils. I wonder about who he is, what drives him to fight, risk his

life for one single man wearing a ridiculous pendant. What are his

alliances?

I'd like to say it's hope that's driving me in this moment -- hope for

a better life. Instead it's fear that's empowering me, because I

can't bear the thought of dying with nothing and no one. My body

aches with exhaustion, but it will be that fear that gives me an

advantage over Raegan. I'm fighting for everything; my past, my

present and my future.

I hadn't even noticed Alarik standing there until his words washed

over me and jarred me from my thoughts.

"Well friends, today is a very interesting day. For the first time in all

our history, we have with us a Riley. Not only that, but the intended

future leader of the Lupina clan." He addresses several clan

members, whose eyes glitter with triumph when their scrutiny falls

upon me. As a leader, Alarik will have kept the news of my

presence down to a minimum number until the outcome of the

battle is known. But as Pantera, he won't have a fight without an

audience. To them, fighting is sport. Bloodshed... is fun.

There is a coldness to their souls that I've spent years learning

about. I'm not sure if those same veins of isolation and

detachment now run throughout my body, or if it perhaps always

has. As Lupina, I spent some time masked within human society.

Though few of them lived near the Clan's territory, my father had a

small shop for any tourists that passed through.

It was merely for appearances rather than money. Often he'd need

me to work behind counter while he dealt with true business. I was

never good at the mundane task of small talk with humans, could

never even imagine living as one of them. Many of the Lupina had

day-jobs, some of the younger ones even attended school.

I never understood it. I tried to, even attempted to make friends

with them. But who would want to live in a life of pretence? What

sort of relationship can one of our kind have with a human if all

they know is the lies we put in front of them?

I find myself lost within my thoughts until reality snaps and draws

me back in with every look of reproach thrown in my direction.

"Kadence Riley, you have challenged one of my strongest fighters

Raegan Wynde to a battle until one can no longer fight, or in your

case, is dead," Alarik says aloud. Whispers roam throughout some

of the members, and one man pipes up in confusion.

"What should she get if she wins? A quick death, I assume."

Judging by his voice, it's clear he doesn't believe his own words.

My eyes flick to Raegan who keeps his gaze fixated on the rock

beneath his feet, his lips tightening in annoyance.

"Ah, you see this is where the interesting part comes in. Kadence

is fighting for a place within our clan." Everyone stands to their

feet in uproar, and I can feel Orla's low chuckles vibrating through

her body.

"A wolf in our clan? Have you gone out of your mind?"

"She's spying for her father!"

"Breen would never have been so foolish, he would have just killed

her already!"

At the mention of the name Breen, Alarik's entire body turns livid. I

see the darkness within him ignite as a blazing inferno wraps

around his senses and he grips onto the man who spoke's throat.

"Do not dare challenge my authority, Rohan!" He roars, and I swear

I feel the force of his shout quaking throughout the mountain. The

man's face reddens as the oxygen stops flowing to his head,

choking and gurgling on his own trapped windpipe. With one swift

motion, Alarik releases him.

"That goes for all of you. Breen is no longer the leader. I am—" He

points to the gold pendant hanging around his neck.

"—and if anyone speaks that way to me again, they can challenge

me for leadership. And they will die in their failure."

Silence follows, not one person dares to swim against his current

of rage. The gold glint of the pendant flickers. The Leader's Prize is

a false illusion of loyalty and power. It's the marking of the

strongest clan member, a symbol to follow only by fear and not by

respect. At any moment, Alarik could lose his title if new strengths

rose to challenge him. Pantera do not follow people, they follow

that pendant, and not one soul would spend a second mourning

his death.

His lips curve, "Besides, she's no wolf."

An older woman with greying hair and piercing silver eyes takes a

step toward me. She walks with venom in her body, danger in her

eyes. Godric and Orla move away as her presence invades my

breathing space. I do not move under her watchful gaze, though

confusion parades every other thought in my mind. She leans in

mere millimetres from my body and inhales my scent, skimming

her dagger-like fingernails along the nape of my neck. What the

hell is she doing?

"Yes...I can smell the panther within her. She is strong," her aged

voice whispers before she steps back to look at Alarik. Repulse

and astonishment washes over everyone at the realisation of her

words, but they do not dare speak. This woman's presence leaves

a chill nestling in my bones, an eeriness to the air I cannot

decipher. She touches Alarik's cheek.

"My son, you know what it means," her whisper fades into the wind

and travels far and near. A substantial question marks rests buried

in the furrow of my eyebrows, what is she talking about? Could she

possibly know anything about my mothers bloodline?

"We know nothing," he bites back, moving from his mother's touch

as he notices my eavesdropping. Alarik folds his arms, "I'm in

a... merciful mood today, so I'll give you one more chance to back

out of this right now. You can still fight Orla for the opportunity to

escape from here."

I flick my eyes to the red-headed witch who cracks her knuckles in

response. Orla's eyes light up with contempt. Slowly turning my

gaze back to Alarik, I say, "Too easy."

"Very well then," his mouth twitches in humour.

Raegan growls, shaking his head disapprovingly. He doesn't want

to fight me, that much is certain. Or maybe he simply loathes the

idea of me being a part of the Pantera should I win. I shake that

thought away, not one person expects me to have a shred of a

chance at winning this battle. I don't know the limitations of my

new body, if my weaknesses or capabilities have changed.

Light stubble decks his face, and there's scars within him that age

his soul, I see it in those dark eyes though he tries to hide it.

Despite this, he could be no older than his early-twenties. Which

means an extra four to five years of training than me. My

confidence diminishes. Godric removes rope that binds my hands.

I inhale the world around me, feel life moving in and out my body

and wrapping me in earth's sweet aroma. Raegan faces me, and

for the first time he's looking at me. Truly looking at me. There's

fears and doubts, weaknesses and vulnerabilities resting in those

pupils just daring to break free and reveal themselves to me. I

focus on the feel of his heart vibrating through the rock beneath

my feet — a steady, harmonious beat which never wavers in its

consistency.

He isn't afraid, and neither am I.

Raegan lunges for me then, whipping his fist in my direction. My

mind is faster, my instincts are heightened and I can almost smell

his intentions right before he acts on them. I duck the oncoming

blow, kicking the surface of my foot against his thigh right above

the peroneal nerve which lies five inches from the knee-cap.

He winces in pain, but it does not deter him from slamming his

knuckles into the right side of my abdomen. The wind leaves my

lungs at once, trapping in my windpipe as I choke to inhale

mouthfuls of air. In my momentary vulnerability, Raegan throws his

weight against mine and my head smacks against the rock. Stars

blur by as the dulling ache spreads throughout my body. The

memory of the blow against my jaw resurfaces until that new pain

dizzies my thoughts.

With his body on top of mine, I manage to jab my forefinger into

his jugular notch lying directly in between Raegan's collar bone. I

can see the pain spiralling through his entire being as he falls onto

the ground beside me, weakened by the blow to one of the most

vulnerable pressure points.

He quickly springs back up to his feet while he regains composure,

a smart move on his part. Lying on the ground while weakened is

not only stupid, but dangerous, so I follow his move and stand.

We're both staring at each other, panting hard, adrenaline coursing

through our veins and bloodlust trailing a fiery path along our skin.

This is a moment that happens during many battles — two beings

who have acknowledges the other opponent's strengths, and both

awaiting for that next move to be taken.

Pain wraps around me, but combined with the adrenaline I feel

more like a throbbing, swollen entity. The fire's blaze has eased by

this coccoon of numbness, but my mind is fracturing. The world

spins and spins, and spins, and I'm tumbling into darkness. My

mother's mangled, torn body flashes through my mind. I can't stop

seeing her surround me, soaked in blood with nothing but

blankness spread across her face, no traces of the woman I knew,

no traces of anything but imprinted horror.

Rage is a drug, and my mind is ravenous for every last drop. A

panther's roar rips my throat a part as I dive for him, but the anger

consumes me whole and I'm nothing but blind to the foot that

clips my chin. Red clouds my vision, the metallic and coppery taste

of blood empowers my other senses.

His leg then sweeps under my ankles until I'm on the ground once

more, his body pressed on top of mine. All I can see is the

darkness in his eyes, the hate for who I am and what I came from.

His fingers wrap around my throat, and I wonder if this man killed

my mother. I picture my death imitating hers, and the pool of

drowsiness threatens to wash me away like it did to her.

But I won't succumb to the temptation of nothingness.

My leg slides along the side of his body, and I dig my left knee into

his upper thigh until theres enough of a gap between us for my

hands to latch onto his forearms. I dig my thumbs into his ulnar

and radial nerve, pressing with every strength I have left until he

cries out with agony. His back straightens while still on top of me,

and I advance on this moment to thrust my elbow into his nose.

The crack of bone against bone pierces my eardrums.

The smell of both our bloods coalescing is tangy and bitter in the

air. I can taste our pain, feel it reverberate along my spine like little

needs teasing the aches to life. But his weight still remains on top

of me, crushing my lungs.

Punch. My brain rattles inside my skull.

Smack. Knuckles dig into the base of my abdomen another time,

fracturing two of my ribs.

The red tide of darkness is approaching. It's ready to claim me,

and when it does I will not wake. I will not see the light of the sun

again.

" Stop ," a voice commands. The blows stop coming, and life

infiltrates my body once again. Alarik stands above me with his arm

out-stretched. I grip onto it, pulling myself to my weak feet despite

the urge to collapse and shut my eyes. Then the confusion begins.

My eyes flick to Raegan who looks bloody and broken, but I

imagine I look far worse.

"She lost, what are you doing?!" Orla steps out to protest. Alarik

raises a finger as if to shut her up, and keeps his eyes focused on

mine. What is happening?

"Godric, bring her and Raegan inside so they may begin healing,"

he orders. My eyes light up, that wasn't part of the deal. Perhaps

he wants my wounds to heal before he lets Orla torture me and

eventually kill me. My head spins with vertigo.

"You're strong, Kadence Riley. There's a fire inside of you that I

like, but I don't trust you. You may stay with us, but you will be

imprisoned until you've earned a place for yourself. Raegan—" he

turns my bloody opponent with a hatred burning in his eyes and a

thirst for blood.

"You will train her in combat. She is strong, she'll learn quick. In

return, Kadence, you will teach Raegan about those pressure points

I see you targeted. Impressive," he continues. My mind can't wrap

around the words he's saying. He's not killing me, I have

succeeded. Distaste crawls upon Raegan's face, completely

repulsed by the idea. I'm not entirely thrilled to be training with him

either, but I'll take what I can get when it comes to survival.

"I can't guarantee your protection. You have come from the Lupina

clan, and while I'm being generous, others won't appreciate it.

Don't think you're safe just yet. You've just entered our world, and

soon you will learn that there are some things, Kadence Riley, far

worse than death."