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Chapter 57
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2024-10-29 19:42:56A few minutes have passed and he hasn't said anything yet. His body has gone rock solid and I'm afraid, that he might not be breathing.
" R-Roman, please say something." I whisper out.
I feel desperate for him to say something, anything.
" What happened?"
I take a breath before confessing.
" It was my 11th birthday and my family decided to surprise me. They didn't want me depressing over you leaving anymore. They hosted the party at aunt Karen's house and the theme was a masked party.
We were playing hide and seek when it happened." I trail off. " I thought the shed would be a good place for me to hide, but I was wrong. I stepped in there and I was only there for a short while, but it was enough for someone to grab me from behind. I had no idea that someone had been in there, I swear." I stop short when I hear him breathing hard.
" I struggled against
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I lay my head on my mother's lap, her hand patting my hair. It feels so nice and I just want to stay in this moment. I want to remain in my mother's comfort.I've missed her and I've missed this feeling. Everything feels so calm with her close to me and I never want her, to seperate from me. I never want to leave this place. I can breathe easily and I don't have to face the hurt anymore. I'm tired of hurting.It pains to hurt." Can I stay here with you mom?" I ask." If you want to." I smile at that.But then Roman comes into mind and my smile slips off my face. I frown a bit." B-but what about Roman, I can't leave him." She doesn't say anything." Mom?" I take my head off her lap and sit up, facing her.
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I have never been a fan of noise when I am sleeping. I just want some peace and quiet and I am not getting any of that right now. I hear my name repeatedly being called, but I have no desire to wake up. I'm tired and I need rest." Hazel, Hazel wake up!" Roman?That voice, it surely sounded like his." Hazel, come on wake up. You need to wake up." The voice sounds desperate and still like Roman's.I must be dreaming that's for sure, because as far as I know, Roman left." Come on Sweet. Don't do this to me, don't do this to us. " Only Roman calls me Sweet. Yes, definetly that is Roman. But why would he beg for me to not do something to him and us?What does he mean by that?... I haven't done nothing else but sleep. I feel my body suddenly being shaken up and Roman continuously begging for me to wake up. Hearing hi
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My heart jumps at the sight of Roman, who is seating on the hood of his car, busy on his phone. As if he can feel me staring, he glances up my way and that's when a smile that takes over my face. I am done with my session and now I have just come outside, seeing him just stopped me in my tracks. He gets off his hood and I start towards him, wanting to be in his arms already. My smile wavers when I notice his footsteps quicken, his whole demeanor changing and his eyes growing wide." Hazel!!!" He shouts, now no longer walking but full on sprinting towards me.My footsteps faulter and my smile slips as I give him a confused look. Horror flashes on his face as his eyes glance behind me for a second. In the midst of following his line of view and glancing over my shoulder, I'm grabbed so fast, away from where I am standing, that I have no time to react. I hear the sound of screeching wheels with something swishing by.
BEGIN AGAIN Chapter 61
"Do I look okay?" I ask, turning away from the mirror to face Roman.He has been standing leaned by the doorway, just watching me. He literally roams his eyes all over my frame before a grin lifts on his face." Well?" I say impatiently." Hazel, you look good in anything you put on." He says, pushing off the wall and coming towards me." Thank you but this is different, it is lunch with your family. " " Baby, I don't think they like you because of what you wear but because of who you are. You are practically family and what you wear is just a bonus." He says, pulling me close by my waist." I hear you, I really do. So, about this." I gesture to my outfit, which is more of a street style with cargo pants, white shirt and heels. I made sure to tie my hair back and keep it neat and clean." Is it okay?" 
BEGIN AGAIN Chapter 62
He loves me. He didn't let me know through speaking outloud but, through words written down. His eyes, for so long have expressed it and I took too long to figure it out. He has not said the words though and for the rest of yesterday, I had been trying to get him to say them. But oh yes, Roman O'Connor is stubborn. I didn't want to make it obvious that I wanted him to say the words. I think at the end of the day, he figured everything out, after all that massaging, baking for him, cuddling and even Romy Time. Yes, Roman O'Connor is stubborn.I even caught him secretly smirking when I asked if there was anything, important that he wanted to say but nope, he simply shook his head and played all innocent. So now, I'm just waiting for the right moment for him to say it, because I would really like to hear him say those three words.But nonetheless, he loves me.He didn't even say he is fo
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It's morning and you'd think, she'd let it be easy for me to go. I literally had to pinch her and have her moving away from me. Getting out of bed, I stretch a bit before heading out of my room.In the bathroom, I do my morning routine and when I open the door, a gasp slips out when Roman quickly gets in and locks the door. My jaw drops at his actions." Roman, what are you doing in here?!" I whisper out, still surprised by his actions.He doesn't say anything but steps closer."Uh w-what are you doing?" I nervously ask, stepping back.I step back until I have no more room left and my back, touches the wall. I let out a shaky breath when he places both his hands on either side of my head, caging me in. He leans in, brushing his lips against mine, making my knees to go weak at his teasing. Just when I lean in to kiss him, he surprises me when he picks me up. I wrap my l
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You stole everything from me.What does that even mean?" How can I steal something from you, when I don't even know you?......You're Roman's friend, no, you aren't anymore. " I shake my head." When Roman finds out about this, he will never forgive you. Never." I say, turning my back to them.I can't believe she would do this to me, to Roman. She is Kyle's partner in crime and she's been pretending to be a good person." Don't you dare turn your back on me Hazel!" She shouts." I can do what ever I f*ckin' want!..... You can't tell me what to do and who do you think you are to order me around huh?!" I say, glaring at her over my shoulder." Oh you'll be eating those words very soon you lil' b***!"" I'm sure I wont. Not when I'll be out of here in no time. Roman is coming for me." I say in confidence of my words.I turn b
BEGIN AGAIN Chapter 64
I could never catch a break.I thought I was done with hospitals already, now to find myself in here again, it tells a different story. I have woken up and Roman is the first person I see. His head is rested on my bed, his hand holding mine. I shift slightly and try pull my hand away but his grip tightens, refusing to let me go.I close my eyes and will myself not to cry. I am so exhausted emotionally and I feel like I can't deal with what happened to me and what, I had learnt not so long ago.I almost died again.I faced death but the difference is that I remember now. I thought I was done with the lies, I guess not. I knew that there would be people who did not like me, but for someone to hate me enough to kill me, that's a whole different level. I have had enough honestly and a part of me, wants me to quit on life but I know I can't. Roman, my dad, my family and friends wont allow me to.
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Months later....I can't believe we finally did it, we graduated. I am more then ready to change the scenery and head on to college, with Roman ofcourse. He totally surprised me when he told me about how he'd had everything covered, before I could even start stressing about it. He literally begged that I let him have his way and darn it, I found myself agreeing before I could think about it, when he suddenly pouted, giving me innocent eyes and all.He can be so sneaky when he wants to.I finally left the Academy in good terms with the place, no longer was there fear or anxiety. I walked away with a smile, being in steady ground with some people. They have been a part of my story, a journey in which would honestly take us having a sit down, in order for me to retell.The life I have lived has been full of twists and turns, ups and downs and though at times, I felt like giving up
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My dearest Hazel...By now you are a young woman, full of dreams and your heart still searching, for more to recieve. I do hope that by the time you read this letter, every bit of desire I had for your life, has come to pass. I hope that you are happy and in love. I hope that you are finally at that point in your life, where you know that your decisions matter, your voice matters.I hope that finally you and Roman have realised that you two, are soulmates.Maybe it's my wishful thinking but I see something there, something that is rare. As young as you two are, I see it and you two ending up together makes total sense, if you know what I mean.I hope that in whatever life has thrown at you, in every way, you must know that you will breathrough each hurdle that comes your way. I want you to know that it's okay to trust people, it's okay
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I can't get his words out of my head, no matter how much I try. What he said, has brought so many thoughts into mind and those words, could only mean one thing, whatever it is, is important. His body language and tone suggested it and I can't think otherwise.I know that he has given me free reign over his phone, like I have done so too, but I just couldn't find myself checking his phone as if I am snooping around. I mean I trust Roman so much, it's bloody impossible for me not to.I can't go and straight out ask him, because that would mean I was eavesdropping. I didn't mean to overhear his private conversation, I just happened to hear, that's all. There are so many things I don't want do, that may come out wrong in his eyes. " Urgh, this is so exhausting!" I groan out." What's exhausting?" My head snap up in the direction of his voice, where he stands at the doorway.Before I can an
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A moan slips out of his lips as I plant kisses along his skin. My focus is sorely on his neck and under his jaw. " Baby, what are you doing?" He asks, his sleepy voice making him sound so hot right now." Morning." I murmur in his ear before continuing with my assualt right where his weak spot is." Hazel." He groans, placing his hands on my waist, squeezing it and causing me to jump slightly.I lean back to look down at him." Will you wake up now?" A smirk plays on his lips whilst still keeping his eyes closed." Roman, look at me already." I whine." But I'm still sleepy." He says, trying to fight off a grin." No you're not. I'm here and that's more then enough reason to want to wake up." " Nope." I gape in disbelief of his answer. Fine, if he wants to sleep, then I'll leave him alone, damn O'
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" Hazel?" I snap out of the trance I was just in, turning to look at my dad.His eyes show concern, even his approach towards me is slow and careful. I watch him silently as he sits on the coffee table, infront of me.We stare at each other for a moment, before he sighs, taking my hand in his own." This is the second time you've been up like this, in the middle of the night. You need to sleep sweetheart."" He wont talk to me. " I say numbly." Hazel...."" Roman wont talk to me, he wont answer my calls. I'm selfish aren't I?"" Hazel don't do this." I pull my hand away, cutting him off." I should feel different after having made this decision, but I'm not. " I rise to my feet. " Being here has made me realise that it's no longer just about me anymore."I walk away and head up to my room, feeling exhausted but not enough
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I'm sorry.They are the words that my grandparents couldn't help but repeat too many times. It's been years since I'd last seen them and I thought I would never see them again. Tensions and disagreements were the cause of us seperating. After my mother's passing, nothing was the same again. My grandparents never saw eye to eye with my father again, both parties mourned differently. My grandparents thought it would be best for them to leave with me and raise me, whilst my father had time to mourn yet my father disagreed. He refused to let me go.The tension was too much and it was not good for either one of us. They suddenly left and communication thinned, until it was no more. Though it saddened me to lose out on contact with them, I accepted that I would never see them again. Years passed but now they are back, they want to mend our relationship and right, their wrongs.
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It truly hurt me to see my dad the way he was last night. The image is still stuck in my head. His words caused an ache to my heart. It hurts that my dad feels so hurt, the blame that he placed on his himself was not right.I don't want him to constantly blame himself, for what happened to me. It's not his fault. I want him to understand this. I have to set things right, I know I have to. Things cant go on like this, it's exhausting to go through this rollercoaster ride once again.It's like my family and I can't catch a break. We need a break from all this. It's my first morning being home, having woken up in my own bed and breathing homey air. It feels weird not waking up next to Roman or him, not being the first one I see. We are so used to being around each other, now only being a phone call away just feels different. Everything feels different but not too bad, though I miss him terribly but being
BEGIN AGAIN Chapter 64
I could never catch a break.I thought I was done with hospitals already, now to find myself in here again, it tells a different story. I have woken up and Roman is the first person I see. His head is rested on my bed, his hand holding mine. I shift slightly and try pull my hand away but his grip tightens, refusing to let me go.I close my eyes and will myself not to cry. I am so exhausted emotionally and I feel like I can't deal with what happened to me and what, I had learnt not so long ago.I almost died again.I faced death but the difference is that I remember now. I thought I was done with the lies, I guess not. I knew that there would be people who did not like me, but for someone to hate me enough to kill me, that's a whole different level. I have had enough honestly and a part of me, wants me to quit on life but I know I can't. Roman, my dad, my family and friends wont allow me to.
BEGIN AGAIN Chapter 63 part 2
You stole everything from me.What does that even mean?" How can I steal something from you, when I don't even know you?......You're Roman's friend, no, you aren't anymore. " I shake my head." When Roman finds out about this, he will never forgive you. Never." I say, turning my back to them.I can't believe she would do this to me, to Roman. She is Kyle's partner in crime and she's been pretending to be a good person." Don't you dare turn your back on me Hazel!" She shouts." I can do what ever I f*ckin' want!..... You can't tell me what to do and who do you think you are to order me around huh?!" I say, glaring at her over my shoulder." Oh you'll be eating those words very soon you lil' b***!"" I'm sure I wont. Not when I'll be out of here in no time. Roman is coming for me." I say in confidence of my words.I turn b
