!! Physical and Sexual abuse in this book may be triggering for survivors !!
Had I been a normal child, I would have hesitated. I would have felt guilty, sad, and maybe pity for the man in front of me but I didn’t. The warm glow from the full moon lit up the dark room. The rays caressed my cheek, squeezed my arm, and wrapped around me. I closed my eyes as they held me like a blanket and promised me that everything would be okay. It was as if she were whispering to me, telling me she was here with me. As if confirming that I was making the right choice. It felt as if the moon agreed with my choice. I was comforted with the knowledge that there was nothing wrong with what I was about to do.
She told me there was nothing wrong with what I was doing, that there was nothing wrong with what I was about to do. If anything, she urged me forward. I lifted my chin and smiled at her, the Moon, not the Goddess that left me here by myself. Not the Goddess that did nothing to help me all those times I prayed to her. Not the Goddess that left me alone when I needed her most. No, it was to the moon that I looked, it was the moon that I worshiped.
The Moon had always been with me. She was always there, always watching, and I was never alone. I nodded as if answering her. I dipped my chin, lowering my gaze to the man on his knees in front of me. Still unaware of the situation he’s found himself in, he glared up at me. I’ll rectify that soon. Our roles have been reversed and I revel in it. Standing above him, it feels so good to be the one staring down at him. The days of being at his mercy were behind me, no longer will I fear him.
Today, things were changing. I promised myself that I would never be put into that position ever again. I picked up the Wolfsbane-soaked dagger. His eyes widened and plea after pathetic plea fell from his lying tongue, but they fell on deaf ears. I stood above him, letting him think he had a chance of persuading me.
The child I was died long ago. I stood there with my arm raised, the moon glinting off my dagger. I stared down into his fear-filled eyes. His death would be slow and painful. I would relish every second.
I savored this moment of power. How many times had I pleaded for him to stop? How many times had I begged until I lost my voice? How many times had I begged until I finally realized he wasn’t going to listen? How long did it take for him to break the innocence in me? Had I ever been innocent? I don’t remember being different from how I am now. I can’t recall a time when I felt I could be free, but look at me now. Knowing that freedom was within my grasp sent a jolt of adrenaline through my body. I could almost taste it on my tongue.
Look at where I was. The man who deprived me of sleep as a child and the man who promised to leave my sister alone if I did what he wanted. The man who forced his way into my life and into the security that was supposed to be my room was in front of me, on his knees, pleading for his life. Without a father who cared enough to even stop his best friend, I never expected anyone to help me. No one would stand up to the Beta. I quickly realized I needed to save myself.
Now that the time had come, I felt powerful and it was amazing. Vengeance was finally mine. Never had I ever thought that this day would come. I never thought I would get out from under him. Today, I did that. I didn’t care what happened after today. I was sure that after today, I would be killed. My mind wasn’t there. No, what I wanted was this man’s death. I didn’t care about the throne, or taking over this pack. What I wanted was his blood on my hands. I wanted to see it spill from his flesh and splash on me. I needed to feel the warm liquid as it rained one me. I wanted to bathe in it, to know I had finally taken back what he’d taken.
Today, I would get what I deserve and take back what he’s taken from me. I will squash the man who defiled me, ruined me, and made me into the monster that I am. I will get rid of the threat to my sister. I’ve thought of this day for as long as I could remember. I wanted to slit his throat but he didn’t deserve a quick death. My father had killed someone during a meeting, he’d slit his throat, and the man had died shortly after. With every bit of strength I have after what he’s done to me, I plunge the dagger into his shoulder.
Air filled my lungs and warmth filled my chest. It was as if I were reclaiming a part of myself, and I had just picked up the first piece. His scream pierces the night air but I don’t give him time to look down at the wound. Lifting the blood-coated dagger I feel his blood splatter me, as if in payment for what he’s done to me. I plunge it over and over again into his chest, reclaiming piece by bloody piece of myself. The moon shines brightly tonight and I smile as I drag the dagger down his chest. His skin spreads for me.
Adea I walked through the hallway. My bare foot slapped against the floor while the other click-clacked as I walked. I’d lost the other one when he picked me up and threw me across the room. Finding it was the last thing on my mind. The servants avoided looking in my direction and those who were near me avoided my gaze. I’d learned a long time ago that no one was going to help me. I didn’t expect anything, not from my father and not from them. No one said it, they didn’t have to. Parents were supposed to love and care for you, I knew that much. My nursemaid once told me that parents love in different ways. Some are affectionate and some just don’t know how to show that love. Even as a young girl I knew she was lying to me, I knew for a fact my father didn’t love me. My father hated me, I knew that for sure. I didn’t have to do much to make him angry. I would say the wrong thing, look the wrong way, and he would hit me. He told me it was because I was supposed to have been born a boy
Part 1 - Before Shane I have loved her since the first time I laid eyes on her but I won’t start there. Let’s start the day before I saw her, the day before I met her, the day before my life changed. Hack. Hack. Hack. The meat split and fell apart under my blade. I spent my day cutting meat into smaller pieces. The other kids my age preferred to work out in the field, saying it was more fun being outdoors under the sun. I preferred being on my own. All the meat hung from the ceiling. My daily job was to prepare the meat for the packhouse meals. The errand boy would run the packaged meat to the packhouse kitchen where they would prepare it for the higher-ranked members. Someone ran up to my window. I wasn’t expecting him for another hour. “What are you doing here?” I asked. When Devin came up to the window, I was even more confused. Why was he here? Probably here to spout off more useless information. Devin was someone who worked in the fields tending to the vegetables. Sometime
The sun peeked over the mountains. Soon, it would light up the fields and splash over the houses. This was my favorite time of day. The animals were still sleeping, no one was out of their bed yet, and the quiet that fell over the pack in the night still lingered. I took a deep breath and smoke billowed around me as I exhaled. I’d been living in this Goddess-forsaken world for thirteen years. I was young and far from naive. We’ve been here in the Clear Mountains pack since we were found. That was three years ago and I hadn’t changed much since. I did my best to stay away from others. I tried not to make friends but Devin liked me, and he was hard to shake. I didn’t care about the opinions of others. I had my sister and that was enough, that’s all I needed. My goal was to live a quiet life, make it to adulthood, and protect my other half, my good half. The story was that I was the Alpha’s bastard son from the next pack over and that was what kept us safe. No one knew I was the crimina
“Father—” A loud, resounding smack echoed and the girl crumbled to the floor. My eyes rounded as I turned to look at her. Had he just-? Did he just-? I couldn’t believe it. My wolf howled inside, determined to protect the girl we didn’t even know yet. Maximus only ever came out to protect me. I didn’t question it as I lunged toward her, shielding her with my body. My hand crunched against the ground as a boot stepped on it. I gritted my teeth right before pain erupted on the left side of my abdomen. I wheezed as the air was knocked out of me. I didn’t want to crush her but I also didn’t want her to get one of the kicks meant for me. I dropped to the ground next to her, shielding her behind me. My forehead smashed against the stones that littered the ground as my abdomen was struck with another kick. I hadn’t had time to take in a breath and my lungs tightened with the need for oxygen. I curled into a ball and covered my head with my arms. Kick after kick, blow after blow landed on m
Adealine’s eyes widen and she holds my attention as her lips part. I pull myself up and fight the urge to laugh as she stares at me in shock. She leans back so we don’t bump heads. I tuck the strand into my pants pocket before she can try and swipe it back from me. Now that I was sitting up a foot away from her face, her cheeks flushed and she looked away from me. I’ve always known that I was easy on the eyes but I’ve never really put too much thought into it. Seeing her staring at me the way she is, has changed that. I like that she’s staring. I’m having an effect on her and I can’t help the giddiness that spreads a blush across my cheeks. I’ve never wanted someone to like me as much as I do right now. I may have just turned thirteen but I’ve been working since I was a child. My body was long and lean. I’ve always been bigger than others my age. My long curly black hair was the only thing I received from my father. Only the offspring of an Alpha had strong dark-colored hair. It was
There was a bit of a limp in her walk but I was sure I imagined it. That or the shoes on her feet were too tight. She led me through the packhouse doors. I’ve never been in here before. The only time I came around here was when I had to fill in for Mitch’s nephew, which wasn’t often, and I was never permitted inside. I usually met the kitchen staff out front or by the entrance to the kitchen. White stone walls stretched two stories high, her shoes clicked against the floor, white trim followed us as we walked into a room that had two mahogany double doors on each side. Everything was so white, so clean here, as clean as her. I didn’t care to take in my surroundings, I kept my gaze on her and her hair that bounced as she walked. She came to a stop in front of dark wooden stairs that seemed to lead up to the Goddess herself. She yanked at my arm and my feet moved by her command. We headed up the insanely long set of steps. Surprisingly enough, we didn’t pass anyone on the way. I was pu
I knew it and yet, I couldn’t bring myself to stop looking at her. As soon as I left here, I would focus only on Mavy. I wouldn’t think about the princess who slept in the room at the top of the staircase. I wouldn’t wonder about the books on her shelves. I wouldn’t wonder if any of them were scandalous. No, I would remember that it’s only Mavy and I against the world. Slowly, I made my way to her bed. Mahogany wood was the theme in this packhouse but more so in her room. Her bed matched her vanity and the frame around her mirror. I smirked, Princess had grown up in the lap of luxury. She deserves nothing less. I took a seat at the edge of the bed and watched her continue to rifle through supplies. When she had everything she needed, she turned from the mirror and faced me. Clenching her jaw, she straightened her back and closed the distance between us. She hesitated for a second, only a second, before she placed the supplies beside me on the bed. She took a step toward me, success
When she walked back to me, she had a tube of ointment in hand. Her shoulders were tense, and her gaze firm as she made up her mind. She still had a limp in her step and a thought crossed my mind. A terrible thought, one I didn’t think could be possible. If he had easily slapped her outside, what happened behind closed doors? When she got to me, she squeezed a bit of the ointment onto her finger. I felt a jolt of pain as her finger prodded a bruise. In a flash, I grabbed her hips and threw her down onto the bed. Her dress rode up but my mind wasn’t on that. All thoughts of being close to her had scattered in the wind. I needed to check, I needed to know. My suspicions were confirmed as I was met with smooth skin marked with bruises. New dark purple bruises lay on top of older yellowing ones. My heart dropped into my stomach. Scrapes and cuts started on her legs and ran all the way up her thighs. I had a suspicion they went higher. “What are you doing?!” She hissed. Her eyes darted t