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2024-10-29 19:42:56FALLON
Between sessions on Friday, I finally have a chance to fill Brooke in on everything that has been happening lately. Being the perfect angel she is, she’s shocked to hear that I nearly swiped my v-card at Gray’s register, but she doesn’t admonish me for wanting to keep things going with him, which I appreciate. While it’s exciting that Gray and I have this little secret affair going, I’m glad I have someone I can talk things through with. I don’t think he’d care if he knew I told my sister. I trust her more than anyone in the word, and I know she’ll keep our secret, too.
I’m actually relieved that Gray and I had the chance to talk and clarify things. I’m so on board with keeping things casual- the last thing I need to worry about during training camp is a relationship. I’ve never been in one, and I don’t think I’d be very good at it anyways. Not to mention the reason I’ve always avoided them- the ever-present fe
C.J. PrimerI'll be heading out of town for the next two days and will have limited internet access, so I'm not sure if I'll be able to post new chapters. If not, I'll be sure to make up for it when I get back with more extra-long chapters or double-post days. Thanks again for reading, and please consider rating/reviewing this book!
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Alpha Gray 33
FALLON I’m pretty sure Judd’s trying to flirt with me. When he spotted me at the bar, he basically made a beeline in my direction and has focused his attention on me ever since. Not that I mind, of course- it’s nice to be complimented- but Judd was the last person I expected to hit on me tonight. He’s got alpha energy in that he’s pretty arrogant and full of himself, and from what I’ve seen he’s got a type- he’s only shown interest in the quieter, smaller, more dainty girls at camp. I’m none of those things. I’m slender, but I’m tall and toned, and I’m far from quiet. Judd’s an attractive guy- he’s bulky and muscular like Davis, and he’s got shaggy light brown hair and boyish good looks. His fighting skills make him even more attractive in my book; the dude’s a beast and has consistently stayed near the top of the rankings. He’s probably one of the hottest guys at training camp, but I haven’t paid much attention to that since
Alpha Gray 34
FALLON “What was that all about?” Boyd asks as I approach our little group. They must have decided to take a break from dancing, because they’re circled up at the bar, sipping on cocktails. Boyd has an arm slung around Vienna’s shoulders, like he’s staking a claim. It’s about time those two took their shameless flirting to the next level. I pause for a moment, trying to think quickly on my feet. “Oh, he had some more questions about that rogue that attacked me,” I say coolly, tossing my hair over my shoulder. “They’re still trying to identify who he was.” Boyd seems satisfied with my answer, because he just nods and takes another sip of his drink. Vienna’s got a smug little smile on her face, though- she knows about the little fling I’ve been having with Gray, but she doesn’t give me up. I knew I could trust that girl. “Where’s Brooke?” I ask, glancing around. Casey and Davis are also posted up by the bar, but
Alpha Gray 35
GRAY When morning comes, I wake feeling more relaxed and rested than I have in ages. This was the first good night of sleep that I’ve had in… I don’t even know how long. I’m often plagued with nightmares replaying the shadow pack’s attack on mine, of my mother screaming at me to get away as she was torn down. Needless to say, I don’t get much sleep after those nightmares rear their ugly head- but last night, they didn’t come. The first thing I’m greeted by upon waking is Fallon’s delicious scent. She’s lying on her side with her back pressed against my chest, and before I even open my eyes, I bury my nose in her hair and inhale deeply. She smells like sunshine and wildflowers and the sweetest fruit, stirring my wolf from his slumber. Mine. I’ve been resting with one arm under her body and the other draped over her, and I’m careful not to wake Fallon as I slide them free. Then I sit up, gazing down at my stunni
Alpha Gray 36
FALLON I push open the nearest door to the squad complex, hanging a right to go to the squad dorms instead of taking my usual left into the trainee barracks. Everything that has transpired over the last twelve hours has my brain completely scrambled, and I just have to tell someone about it. And by someone, I mean my sister. I speed-walk down the hallway to her room, testing the door handle. It’s unlocked, and I don’t mean to throw it open as hard as I do. As the door collides with the wall on the other side, I rush in to see a very startled Brooke sitting on her bed, her legs crisscrossed beneath her and her laptop upon them. “Hi! Sorry…” I grab for the handle again, swinging the door closed gently. “Is everything okay?!” Brooke asks, pushing her glasses up the bridge of her nose. “You scared me half to death!” I spin around to face her, leaning back against the door and grinning. I don’t even know whe
Alpha Gray 37
GRAY I called the council together on Sunday evening to discuss my trip to Denver. The council for the six-pack consists of twelve members: the alphas from each pack and our betas. Reid and I are the young bucks, heading up the Goldenleaf and Stillwater packs. Theo’s dad, Alpha Anders, runs the Summervale pack, and Alpha Damian, Jax’s father, runs the Westfield pack. Brock will be taking over the Riverton pack at the end of the summer for his old man, Alpha Rowe. I’m looking forward to the day when all five of us are the alphas of our packs, running the council. Not that I mind the current alphas, but some of them are older, stuck in their ways, and resistant to change. The only outlier will be Alpha Vaughn from the Norbury pack. He’s got a son, Chase, but he’s still in high school, so it’ll be a while before he takes over. I’m hoping that Chase will come join us at the squad complex after he graduates high school so we can ge
Alpha Gray 38
FALLON I train hard all week, but something’s just off- I’m making stupid mistakes, sloppy errors. I know it’s because my emotions are on overdrive right now, but for the first time I can’t seem to just turn them off and focus. I miss Vienna. I miss Gray. I’m training harder than ever before, but I still feel like I’m behind. Even the night sessions that we’ve been doing haven’t pulled me out of my rut. The five of us- Boyd, Davis, Shay, Connor, and me- have been sneaking out of the complex and into the forest after dinner each night to brush up on our moves and spar, but I still don’t feel like I’m improving. I’m terrified for the next cuts and rankings. On Friday evening, Casey offers to lead our little after-hours training session and teach us a few things. She probably just wants to be around Davis, since the extra training has been cutting into their time together, but we’re all appreciative nonetheless. Among the moves she demo
Alpha Gray 39
GRAY I dropped Reid off at the packhouse in Stillwater when we returned from Denver, then headed straight to the squad complex. I parked my Jeep in its usual spot and was heading for the gate when I caught Fallon’s scent, carried on the breeze from the opposite direction. My heart immediately lurched- with the events in Denver still fresh, my mind rushed to the worst case scenario- but after I followed her short trail to the clearing, my concern turned to jealous rage at the sight of that fucking kid lying on top of her. Now I’m pacing in my room, regretting that I told her to come see me in an hour rather than in ten minutes. Her explanation in the forest made sense, and now with the benefit of hindsight I’m able to calm down, think clearly. Thank god I’m able to control my wolf, or he would’ve ripped Boyd’s throat out tonight. Having Fallon come to my room here at the complex is risky, but I leave the door unlocked s
Alpha Gray 40
FALLON “Circle up!” Theo calls out, his hands cupped around his mouth. We’ve been out in the arena training under the hot summer sun, and we’re all sweaty and tired. This morning was endurance training, while this afternoon we’ve been doing some sparring with our partners. I’ve been partnered with Shay all week, which would have been fun if I wasn’t in such a rut. Today’s session has been much better, though- I don’t what know changed, but I’m back, baby. I’ve been landing every offensive move, dodging every advance on defense. I just hope it’s not too little, too late. Saturday afternoon’s training session is always stressful because it’s the last one before weekly cuts are posted. There are thirty of us left, so half of us will be going home at some point before training camp ends. Since I’ve had such an off week, I’m even more anxious for the cut list to be posted, and I’m dreading seeing my name on it.
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Alpha Gray 55
FALLON It feels a little strange returning to the squad complex on Tuesday morning, like I’ve been away for weeks rather than days. So much has happened since I passed through the gate on Saturday afternoon, staring out the window from the backseat of Boyd’s dad’s SUV, turning over in my mind whether I’d have the courage to come back for the full moon run. I’m so fucking glad I did. I was being a total chicken, which isn’t like me at all. Then again, love makes you do some crazy, foolish things. Thank god my sister was there to make me realize how stupid I was being and talk me into coming back to face the music- I definitely owe her one. I’ll add it to the list of debts I owe Brooke for always coming through when I need her. Gray slides the Jeep into his usual spot outside the gate, throwing it in park and cutting the engine. He turns to me, dark eyes alight w
Alpha Gray 54
GRAY “They’re ready for you, Alpha,” Deke says, peering in the doorway of my bedroom at the packhouse expectantly, a grin spreading across his face. He’s looking forward to this almost as much as I am- the moment I finally get to tell my pack that I’ve found my mate. While Deke and I have done our best to hold our fractured pack together since I was forced to prematurely step up as their alpha, having a luna completes our pack in some sense, makes us more whole. The future of our pack is brighter than ever. I’m so fucking proud to introduce Fallon to the pack as my mate. She’s a perfect luna- so strong and brave, a force to be reckoned with. I couldn’t have designed a better she-wolf to lead the pack with me if I’d tried; she’s so much more than I could’ve ever imagined. I can tell she’s nervous- she’s changed her clothes twice since we returned to the packhouse, and she’s been fiddling with her hair in the mir
Alpha Gray 53
GRAY I wake the next morning from the best night’s sleep of my life. I spent hours alternating between fucking and making love to Fallon, coaxing moans from her pouty lips and watching her pant and writhe in pleasure. I’m still completely in awe of her, still in disbelief that she’s finally mine, forever. We’ve sealed the mate bond; nothing can separate us. I was so wrapped up in Fallon last night that I totally forgot about the full moon run, or the fact that my pack was probably wondering where the hell I went after it ended. My bedroom’s far enough away from the main area of the packhouse that I doubt anyone could’ve heard us- but then again, with the way Fallon was screaming, it’s anyone’s guess. There’s no concealing my contentedness when I enter the kitchen of the packhouse the next day. Deke’s cooking something in a pan on the stove and I stop in the doorway, leaning idly against it and clearing my throat to ann
Alpha Gray 52
FALLON “I always knew it was you,” Gray murmurs in my ear as he carries me through the packhouse, up the stairs and down the hall. Warmth spreads in my chest as I plant a shower of kisses on his cheeks, his nose, his eyelashes, his forehead. I’m so in awe of him, of how it feels to be his, for him to be mine. My parents were right; there’s no way to put the mate bond into words. It’s complete and utter euphoria. Everything I’ve ever felt for Gray is multiplied tenfold; the emotions are so overpowering I don’t know whether I want to laugh or cry or scream or pass out. Scratch that- I know what I want. I want him to take me to his bed and fuck me senseless. Gray kicks the door of his bedroom closed behind us, carrying me over to the bed and tossing me down onto it. My body bounces with the springy softness of the mattress, then his body covers mine, his lips crushing down in another bruising kiss. He pushes himse
Alpha Gray 51
GRAYThey say if you love something, you should let it go. So I did. I set her free, and I don’t think she’s coming back.I still have no regrets.Those weeks I spent with Fallon were the first time I’ve felt alive- really alive- in a long time. For the past five years, I’ve been numb, frozen in my grief, pushing forward blindly and refusing to let anyone or anything in, refusing to really feel anything. Throwing myself into my duties as alpha and to the security squad to avoid any semblance of an actual personal life. Then Fallon came along and started chipping away at the dam, breaking it down and causing a flood.Even if she doesn’t come back, at least I had that glimpse at happiness for a moment. I now know for certain that there can be real joy in life on the other side of the pain I’ve been suffering since my family was ripped away from me. She’s both
Alpha Gray 50
GRAY “Will you shut the fuck up and focus?” Brock snaps, pounding his fist on the table. We’ve been shut in this stuffy conference room for the better part of an hour, combing through the details of every recruit’s last trial, agonizing over our final selections for the squad. The conversation about Bex started to go off the rails when Jax commented on her massive rack, then took a nosedive when Theo started in on what he’d do if he had the opportunity to take her home for a night. Brock, Reid and I are all used to their antics by now, but we’re stressed, we’re exhausted, and more than anything, we’re ready to get the hell out of this room. Now isn’t the time for the Jax and Theo roadshow. “Jeez, man, lighten up,” Theo grumbles, shooting Brock a sideways glance. Brock lets out an exasperated sigh, scrubbing a hand over his face. “I just want to get this over with.” “Me too,” Reid agrees. “Let’s
Alpha Gray 49
FALLON It might seem like overkill for my friends and I to sneak in extra training after the alphas work us so hard all day, but our nighttime sessions have quickly become my favorite ritual. As wolf shifters, we already have a strong drive to stick close with one another, be part of a pack, and the bonding that occurs when you spend an extended amount of time with the same people is no different. It’s like my friends and I have formed our own little pack within the pack, learning each other’s strengths and weaknesses, having one another’s backs. I feel a tinge of sadness when Boyd suggests we call it a night on Friday evening, the realization sinking in that this is our little group’s last after-hours session together. By this time tomorrow, we’ll know whether we’ve made the squad- and I’m so hopeful that we’ll all make it, together. It seems like the others must have similar sentiments, because we take a little longe
Alpha Gray 48
FALLON “Girl, you’re on fire!” Shay laughs, elbowing me. “About time you got that damn flag, for real this time!” We’re sitting at our usual table in the dining hall on Wednesday evening, still pumped about our war games win this afternoon. The alphas let us choose our own teams this time around, so naturally my friends and I fielded ourselves together. I got the flag fair and square and I even made it across the boundary without one of my own teammates taking me down- and the best part? Since we were all teamed together, we all get to share the victory. “What’s this about a flag?” Brooke asks, walking up behind me with a plate in hand. “I keep hearing something around the complex about how my sister’s a total badass.” She waggles her eyebrows, setting her plate on the table and kicking a leg over the bench, sliding in to take a seat beside me. I’ve totally turned it around since Monda
Alpha Gray 47
FALLON I feel like shit. I’ve been bottling everything up since Saturday night- I haven’t even gone to Brooke to talk things over. I don’t know why… maybe I’m embarrassed? I feel like a fool for getting involved with Gray. Hannah’s words still haunt me. As I jog onto the practice field on Monday morning, all of my muscles are achy, like the pain I’ve tried to bury deep in my soul is physically manifesting in my body. Then I see Gray standing out there with the other alphas and the sight of him cuts like a dagger straight to the heart. Even in his workout attire- gym shorts and a cutoff t-shirt- he’s an Adonis. His magnetic eyes immediately find mine. I dart my gaze away quickly, staring at the back of Davis’ neck instead as I follow him to the center of the practice field and take a spot beside him. I’m now close enough that I can smell Gray, my wolf stirring in response, but I can’t bring myself to look at him
