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Going Back
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2024-10-29 19:42:56Related chapters
All Grown Up Blurting It Out
Audrey“Should we go straight over to his place? Or wait, he’s probably at the hardware store right now. That’s easy. Let’s swing by on the way back to the house. Mom is dying to see you too, but I’m sure she’ll understand if we have to make a stop on the way.” She smirked at me. “You’ll have to keep it to kissing for now, though.”I shook my head. I wasn’t ready for a confrontation with Jesse yet. I hadn’t told him that I was coming back, even though I knew it was only a matter of time before the rumor mill informed him. I should probably talk to him before he heard from someone else. I didn’t want him to think that I was avoiding him. Anyway, I wanted to see him.Not right away, though. I wanted to sleep before I saw him, at least. I was still worn out, and I didn’t want to say something that I would regret.I also didn’t want him to look at me, knowing that I was pregnant, and accuse me of not taking care of myself and, by proxy, our baby. I hadn’t realized how important that was t
All Grown Up Together
Audrey“Have you at least given Jesse a heads-up already?” Annabelle asked. “It is his, right? Not some French dude’s? I mean, it’s okay if it’s some French dude’s, but Jesse’s going to be heartbroken.”I shook my head. “It’s his. But I haven’t told him yet. I wanted to tell him in person,” I said, even though I knew that part of my delay was just that I was having a hard time getting the courage to do it.“Yeah, that’s probably a good idea,” Annabelle said. She paused. “You probably don’t want to tell him in the middle of his work day, huh?”“Nope,” I said, shaking my head. “To be honest, I really need a shower and a night of good sleep first.” I glanced over at her, wondering if she would argue with that. I knew that Jesse had a right to know. It wasn’t like I was going to try to keep this from him. I just wasn’t ready for that conversation yet. Surely, she would understand that.Fortunately, Annabelle was nodding. “Yeah, let’s get you home.” She started the car. Was it just my imag
All Grown Up Stranger
JesseWe weren’t super busy on Saturday, and it was easy enough to manage the shop by myself while Joe was on his lunch break. The only trouble was, it gave me a little too much time to think. I was starting to dread that. I still couldn’t stop thinking about Audrey.That said, I was starting to finally feel like I had settled back into my old routine. All right, maybe I was still going to Gabby’s more than I used to, all for the sake of asking Annabelle about her sister. I was starting to get used to the silence around the house in the mornings and evenings, though, and that was what really mattered.I did miss the excitement of being with Audrey. Now, every day sort of felt the same. A colorless blur. Oh, there were certainly moments that were out of the ordinary, like when Chance actually clocked in on time that morning and Joe started cheering for him, confusing the heck out of the kid. That had brought a grin to my face.Most of the day was just the same as the day before: going
All Grown Up Take Me Now
AudreyI had been nervous about how my reunion with Jesse would go. Would there still be that lingering anger that had driven us apart over my last few days in North Carolina? I knew that he had apologized for that, and I of course had forgiven him. Still, there might be an awkwardness that hadn’t been there before.He could have realized what I had been telling him all along, that dance was the most important thing to me and that he couldn’t factor into those decisions. He could have decided that he was better off with someone else. Because hell, he sure deserved someone else. He was a good guy, and he deserved someone who was going to put him first.He didn’t seem to be thinking along those lines, though, as he kissed me. The kiss was heated, his soft lips moving firmly against mine. He took control of the kiss, plunging his tongue into my mouth and tangling his fingers in the hair at the nape of my neck to guide me into a slightly different angle so that our noses weren’t mushed to
All Grown Up Like Teenagers
JesseAudrey giggled as she turned her leggings the right way around and pulled them on. I couldn’t help grinning over at her. She sounded happy, and I knew that it wasn’t just the orgasm making her feel that way. No, she looked happy to be back, and I knew it wasn’t Aberdeen in general that was making her feel that way. She had to miss Paris and her ballet, but she was happy to be here with me. That meant the world to me.“Just like teenagers,” she commented as she pulled her shirt on. I was there immediately to push my hands up under the fabric, touching her breasts through the lacy bra that she had just covered up. “We can barely keep our hands off one another.”I raised an eyebrow at her. “Are you complaining?”She sighed happily, leaning into me as I tugged one side of her bra out of the way and toyed with her nipple. “Not at all,” she promised me. She leaned up on her tiptoes for another soft kiss. “I know you’ve got to get back to work and all, but maybe I can see you later?”I
All Grown Up How Long This Time?
JesseI tried not to think about the inevitability of her return to France. She might be done with the Global Travelling Dance Academy of Performing Arts for now, but I knew her well enough to know that it wasn’t forever. She’d be back eventually. Sooner rather than later, probably.I pushed those thoughts aside, though, reminding myself of what she had said to me the last time she was here: Can’t we just enjoy the time that we have? That was what I wanted to do now. Although I also intended to have a serious conversation with her at some point about our future. There was no way in hell I was letting her go off back to France without me again. No way in hell.For now, though, we’d keep things light. “Have you had lunch yet?” I asked her as I slid into the driver’s seat of my truck.Audrey shook her head. “Nope, and I’m starving,” she admitted. “This whole jetlag thing is hell on my body, let me tell you.”“When did you get back?” I asked her. “Just today?”“Yesterday, actually,” Audre
All Grown Up Autumn Vibes
AudreyI knew that I shouldn’t have eaten so much, but I really had been starving when Jesse asked if I had eaten lunch. I definitely shouldn’t have eaten so many fried, heavy foods, especially not when I had been so careful about my diet over the past couple of months in France. But I was hungry, and French fries had just sounded way too good to pass up.Now, though, I was feeling queasy again. The last thing I wanted was to bolt for the restroom to get sick. The lies about why I was really back here just kept coming, and although Jesse believed me for now, I didn’t think it would take much for him to put two and two together and realize why I was really here. He was a perceptive guy, and he knew me all too well.I tried to play it cool as he kept asking me questions about Paris and getting kicked out of the Academy. This, I hadn’t planned on. I had thought, somehow, that he would be so happy that I was back that he wouldn’t care so much about why. I’d known before I went to see him
All Grown Up Putting It Off
AudreyFirst, though, I had to get to the point where I had the baby. Right now, my visions of the future were dashed as my stomach roiled uncomfortably. I bolted from the table, barely managing to gasp out a quick, “Be right back!” Fortunately, there was no one in the bathroom as I hunched over the toilet and threw up everything that had tasted so good just minutes ago.I was pale and shaking by the time I was through, and I gave myself a grim look in the mirror as I washed my hands. Behavior like this wasn’t going to help me keep my secret, I knew that. Jesse was bound to worry about me. The last thing I needed was for him to insist on taking me to a doctor or something. Which was just the kind of thing that he might do.Food poisoning. That would probably cover it for now. I’d say it was something on the flight, maybe. That it had been bugging me the whole time that I was in transit. That would buy me time until I was ready to tell him about the pregnancy. Maybe the morning sicknes
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All Grown Up All Grown Up
AudreyI couldn’t believe that Jesse had gone to all of this work to build the perfect nursery for our baby. From the looks of the crib, it was hand-built, not just one of those flimsy things that you put together from the store. I could tell that there was still some work that he planned on putting into that, and there was a rocking chair only half finished on the floor. But Jesse was building me a nursery for our baby.I could barely believe it.Here I had been so worried that he would want nothing to do with me or the baby, when in fact, exactly the opposite was true. He wanted this enough that he was willing to put his love and dedication into incorporating us into his life and his home. He wanted our baby to grow up here just like he had grown up here.He was so perfect. I didn’t know how to tell him that.Instead, I was given the opportunity to show it to him.I caught his hands in mine and tugged him out of the nursery and back down the hallway to his bedroom. This time, I was
All Grown Up Moving Forward
JesseWhen I heard Audrey’s reasons for why she hadn’t told me about the pregnancy, I felt my heart break a little. Not because her reasons were terrible, but because I’d been so terrible to her this week. If she’d only explained things to me before. I knew that was my fault, though. I hadn’t let her explain. We’d been tired and too full of emotions to really talk last weekend, but I at least should have made time to see her earlier in the week.I didn’t know what I’d been expecting from her, but her actual reasons for not telling me were almost too sweet.“I’m assuming that you want to try to get yourself back into shape and go back to being a ballerina once the baby is born?” I said now, at dinner.To my surprise, Audrey shook her head. “Honestly, I think those days are over.”“I’m sure you can talk to your director and work something out with him,” I said, frowning. “I know there was the injury as well as this, but he seems like a reasonable guy. It’s not like you don’t have the ta
All Grown Up Mending Bridges
AudreyJesse slowly came up to the porch, like he thought I might run in the other direction. “You look really pretty,” he said quietly.“Is that all you came here to say?” I asked tartly.The lips of his mouth twitched with a grin. “Just the start of it,” he promised me. “Have you already eaten? I was hoping that maybe I could take you to dinner and we could talk.”I stared at him for a long moment. So now he wanted to talk? I wanted to hear whatever it was that he wanted to say, though. I wanted him, so badly that I ached. I found myself nodding. “Let’s go,” I said, heading toward his truck.We were both silent on the way to the restaurant that had been our favorite as teens. I should have known that he would take me there. Back to where it all began. There was a part of me that was terrified that I was never going to be able to come back here again after this too-serious conversation that we were about to have.There was another part of me that soared with hope, wondering if this m
All Grown Up Missing Him
AudreyI shook my head. “It’s more complicated than that,” I sighed. “He just got mad because I didn’t tell him that I was pregnant until we were on the way to the hospital. I lied to him about why I was back here, and he can’t trust me anymore.” I bit my lip. “I deserve it, for waiting for the perfect time. I just didn’t think waiting was going to end up making things so terrible.”“Oh, Audrey,” Annabelle sighed, coming over to sit next to me on the bed and giving me a hug. I knew she was probably going to be running late for her shift, but she didn’t seem to care. She just wanted to make sure that I was all right. I nearly cried with how much I appreciated it.She noticed. “Are you crying?”I had to laugh. “Hormones,” I told her. “I’m pregnant, remember? My emotions are all over the place.”She shook her head and went to grab me a tissue from the box on the dresser. “For what it’s worth, I don’t think he’ll be mad at you forever,” she said. “You didn’t see him when you were in Paris
All Grown Up Baby On Board
AudreyI’d had a great day with Mom and Annabelle, cooing over all the adorable little things that we could buy for the baby in the local mall. I knew that they were really excited about the baby, but as much as I tried to match their enthusiasm, I still couldn’t help but feel upset and unsure. It would have been so much easier if I had known that Jesse and I were an item and that he was going to be there for me. For us.I still hadn’t heard from him, though, and now it had been nearly a week since he had found out about the fact that I was pregnant.It had been a long week. Other than that shopping trip, I had barely left the house. What was there to do? Anywhere that I went around town, there was a chance that I might run into Jesse. I didn’t want to admit that I was avoiding him, but the conversation that he and I needed to have wasn’t one that I really wanted to start in public where anyone could witness it.It was a small town. Soon enough, everyone was going to realize that I wa
All Grown Up Audrey
JesseI took a calming breath to steady myself. No. I at least knew Audrey well enough to know that she wouldn’t do something like that without at least telling me that was her plan. Even though I hadn’t reached out to her, she knew where to find me if she really needed to talk about something like that. She knew where I worked, and she knew where I lived.At least, I thought I knew Audrey well enough to trust in that. If not Audrey, though, I had a feeling I would have caught an earful from Annabelle if her sister was even considering that.“You’re sure it’s yours?” Joe asked.“Yeah,” I said. I grimaced. “I actually asked her if it was someone else’s and that was why she hadn’t told me about it. She got pretty upset that I had even dared to think that she might have been with someone else. I believe her.”Joe nodded, and I could tell he was thinking everything over.“Am I right to be angry with her?” I asked, when he didn’t say anything. “I mean, she flat-out lied to me. You were rig
All Grown Up Processing
JesseI knew that I should probably talk to Audrey. Not talking to her was driving me crazy. She had always been one of my best friends, and if there was anyone that I wanted to talk to, it was definitely her. I missed her. I wanted to know how she was handling all of this. I wanted to know what she was thinking.I wanted to make sure that she was following the doctor’s orders to rest and stay off her feet for a little bit, in case it was the stress that had caused that terrible cramping that she’d had the other night. It had been hard for Audrey to stay off her feet before when her ankle was injured, so I could only imagine how she was coping with it now.I hoped for the sake of the baby, our baby, that she was taking the doctor’s words seriously. I had a feeling she would be, though. Somehow, I knew that she was going to make an incredible mother. That little baby was lucky.It was one of the few things that I was sure of.The rest of it was all uncertainties, and that right there w
All Grown Up Stress
Audrey“Eleven weeks,” I said. “Annabelle and I went for the ultrasound on Friday.” I pulled out the picture to show her, and her face lit up.“Look at that little peanut of a thing,” she cooed. “He looks adorable.”“He?” I asked skeptically. “You can’t possibly tell that from the picture.”Mom tutted. “Let me have my dream,” she said. “It would be good to have a little man around the household again. Besides, look at the way he’s positioned. He must be a boy.”I tried not to laugh. “Maybe it’s a boy,” I said, glancing at Annabelle.“Audrey’s hoping it’s a girl so that she can teach her to be a ballerina,” Annabelle said.“The world could use more male ballerinas,” Mom said, winking at me. “I always wished that I would have a boy to balance out you girls.” She sounded wistful, and I suddenly realized that I had never known if two kids were all that she planned to have or if things just hadn’t worked out for more. It suddenly seemed like something that I should know.Mom was wrapped up
All Grown Up Telling Mom
AudreyI had barely left my bedroom for the rest of the weekend after Jesse dropped me off at home. I couldn’t help thinking of the terrible things that he had said to me out in the driveway. I couldn’t help thinking of how much I deserved for him to say those things and more to me.I had fucked up. I knew that now. No, I had known that all along. I knew that I should tell him about the baby. All the reasons not to tell him seemed so stupid now. I couldn’t even think how to apologize to him, in fact, that’s how stupid all the reasons sounded in my head.Not that I was going to get a chance to apologize to him. I had given him his space on Saturday. He wanted time to cool off and process things, and I would give that to him. Sunday, I hadn’t been able to stop myself from texting him, though. I understood if he wasn’t ready to talk yet, but I just wanted to know when he might be ready to talk. The uncertainty was killing me.He hadn’t responded. Suddenly, I felt panic go through me, eve
