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After Everything 25
He leans in running his thumb along my cheek with a gentle stroke, the wave of butterflies are filling my entire body in anticipation. His touch finally jolts me, as he leans in and smashes his lips against mine. My mind finally aligns with my body as I move my arms and wrap them around his shoulders as his grabs my face between his hands to deepen the kiss. I feel this everywhere. Like everywhere. He is everywhere. In me. Around me. Consuming me. The kiss is everything. It is fucking amazing. We kiss and kiss and kiss. It feels like days and hours have passed but in reality it’s a matter of minutes and seconds. His scent. His warmth. His presence. It’s all filling me. It reaches into every crevice of my body and ignites it. I never want to stop kissing him, like ever. But reality draws in and we slowly detach our mouths from each other. As I move my arms to around his waist and he pulls me closer to his body, there isn’t an inch of space separating us. We stay here
After Everything 26
We are together. Kingston and I we have been dating for a week now and to be honest we fell into it very easily. Nothing much changed from before, except for a lot more touching whenever we’re together and an increasing amount of intimacy when making out. We haven’t taken that next step. We will soon, but for our now we are riding the wave of our new found bliss. Today’s his first home game in a while, so I ditched Cole’s jumper for a new jumper with a ‘27’ and ‘James’ scrawled across the back. And well since Austen and Josie are now out in the open loved-up she is wearing his ‘13’ and ‘Cooper’ written in bold text across her back. We snapped a photo before the game with our guys before they hit the change-rooms. Addy and Sutton just have plain jerseys on now with no numbers of the back, I said they could wear Coles still but they opted out. I’m slowly starting to enjoy the sport more, it was dad’s thing and being surrounded by it is turning into a positive thing it’s like he’l
After Everything 27
We enter the lecture hall after picking up coffee this morning from Glazes, our new morning ritual we do together. Kingston practically lives at mine he doesn’t need much and I’m closer to campus. And well Cole is at his and as much as I love my brother doing stuff with your boyfriend whilst your brother is walls away he is not the most comfortable. We tried one time to stay at his but Cole practically burst into the room the minute he heard something, so we never tried that again. It’s a state of bliss, calm, comfort and perfection. He learnt I am not a morning person without my coffee. I learnt no kisses with morning breath. I’ve discovered he loves little kisses just along his jaw in the morning. I also learnt he does not sleep in, ever. He tries not to wake me but well he is as loud as a baby elephant and the instant feeling of warmth leaving me hits. So we get coffee every morning from Glazes sometimes I look like a zombie with my hair everywhere, bags under my eye
After Everything 28
She gets this little grin that tugs on her lips when something is making her all giddy. She hasn’t stopped giving me that look for the past 30 minutes. As I much as I love planning dates and making her feel special because that’s everything she deserves. The look on her face right now shows me that maybe I should let her plan some more. She does love her routines and planning. I have seen her google calendar, it’s all colour coded and perfect. The way she meticulously follows every step of her routine in the morning or before bed its freaking adorable. She has small little quirks she does like dancing to no music when she’s brushing her teeth or how she recites grey’s anatomy whilst doing her makeup. Or how she always stands like ‘a superhero’ in front of the mirror and repeats the line of Amelia Shepherd ‘only freaking superheroes’ Which she totally is. She is so strong and brave I admire her courage and strength. She has her days from time to time. This morning I coul
After Everything 29
The unfamiliar coldness of the other side of the bed hits me in an instant. That’s when I remember Kingston is away on a team building camp in the middle of the season with the byes and whatever. It’s been 4 days since he left. I miss him. It puts a time difference between us. Not the best thing to have in a relationship. But this could become reality… In 9 months or so. Not that I’ve been the best girlfriend during the past 6 days either. I could lie and say I don’t want Kingston to follow me wherever I end up but Damien raised me better and I don’t lie. This short week stint of long distance well it’s hard. Dependency has always been an issue of mine, I’m either super attached or so far away from a person, it’s like I’m in a different country to them even though they’re right next to me. Over the years I’ve fallen into dependency on a few people. Trust comes hard for me it takes me awhile to open up and fully trust someone completely. But that’s the thing about dependency
After Everything 30
He hangs up and I know what I need to do. I walk down the hotel corridor towards Coach’s room. I know he’s in here because I can hear the NHL replays on the TV in the background. I knock. “Hey Coach. I need to leave now.” “It’s her isn’t it?” “Yeah she is not doing okay at all everyone is trying to help her but she asked for me.” “You are going. My daughter loves that girl like her own sister. Hell, she is like my own daughter. So you go take all the time you need and don’t come back until she is okay. You hear me son. Emerson Tate Fitzgerald is a special kind of gem. Her heart holds the most love but it also means she feels the most pain and she is in an immense amount of pain right now. You go and save her. Save yourself because by the looks of your face I can see it’s breaking you too.” “Thank you.” Is all I can mutter in response as I hear his words and digest them. I walk back into my room to see Miles is packing my bag. “Thanks man.” “You are shakin
After Everything 31
I’m packing up the place I called home for the past two weeks. Two weeks ago. I hit rock bottom. I fell straight into depression. But everyone and I mean everyone never gave up on me. And him. He came when I said I needed him the most. He was there. Every step of the way. I honestly knew what I was asking for when I said I needed him. It was the biggest cry for help. I didn’t want to come back here for the reasons I told them that night but I knew I had to. I accepted it and believed these two weeks would help. And they did tremendously. I’m feeling a lot better now. I feel like the weight of the past five years is finally off my shoulders. I spent the past 10 days in a mental health facility for teenage girls. Lily owns and runs the place. She does an amazing job. Group therapy is good. But my thoughts and lightbulb moments usually happen on the pink plush couch of Lily’s office. She has many seating options but the pink couch has and always will be my favouri
After Everything 32
She’s back. I have spent the past two weeks on edge. I knew it was what she needed to recover, move on to finally allow herself to be happy for real. I missed her so much. Her smile. Her little routines. I missed it all. It was hard without her but we did it. And seeing her flash that smile at me from across the street made it all worth it. The time apart so she can heal and grow. I picked her up from the facility and she looked lighter and happier than I’d ever seen her. We spent the car ride talking and catching up. The ease she spoke with and strength to go through what she did. We went and got ice-cream continuing the tradition. We went home so she could see her brothers after we had spent the last couple hours together. The girls have a night planned for her tonight and Josie is going to spend the night with her. Per Em’s request. But Josie already made a group chat with me, Cole and Damien to send updates to because she knows she would want that. She is the lig
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