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Author: Amanda Bittencourt
last update Last Updated: 2024-10-29 19:42:56

- flashback -

beep. beep. beep. beeeep. beeeeep. beeeeeeep. beeeeeeeeeeeeeeep.

It’s only getting louder and quicker.

I’m pulled from my sleep. What. Mum. No. This can’t be happening again.

I spent the night in mum’s room with Cole but he isn’t here anymore.

What is going on.

What is that beeping?

I glance up to see one of mum’s monitors flashing.

I instantly hit the call bell. Even if it’s a false alarm, I would rather know.

Mum has coded twice, but they have managed to restart her heart.

We are losing her and there’s nothing I can do.

I feel helpless.

Hopeless.

Why us? Why me? Why her?

beep. beep. beep. beep. beep.

It’s still going.

My mind trails the path of losing her, everything she’ll miss and what she won’t get to see.

That fucking plane.

It’s taking everything from us.

• end of flashback -

I sit up in bed, trying to draw a breath. My clock on my nightstand says 4:48AM.

A nightmare.

I haven’t had one since last year.

The anniversary is today.
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  • After Everything    19

    A familiar warmth encloses my back. Cole. He pulls me into his lap. I’ve been silently crying for hours now. “Shhh Em. It’s alright.” I gaze up and he’s there. Kingston came with Cole. “How did you find me?” I ask in a very hoarse tone from all the crying. “Emmy I will always find you.” I reach out to grab onto Kingston’s hand. He takes it and squeezes. These two boys right here found me. They knew I was missing and they found me. I didn’t show up at class that’s probably how Kingston knew I was missing. “Are you ok, Em?” he looks down and says. “Yeah I am. I woke up after a nightmare and wasn’t going back to sleep. So I came to only place I knew they’d listen.” “Em, don’t do that again. You can’t run away and not tell anyone. We all care about you and are here for you, right here. We aren’t going anywhere. I’m going to let Damien know you’re ok before he calls a freaking search party, alright.”Cole says standing giving my shoulder a little s

  • After Everything    20

    The pitter patter of the rain hits the windows of Della’s diner. Where Em and I have been for the past 3 hours after I picked her up from work and we came here to work on our assignment. It’s been three days since we stayed up at her place watching Grey’s until 4AM as we may have finished season 1. In one night. The obsession is real. With Grey’s and her. She’s in the same gorgeous sweat set but in a light blue colour and her dirty AF1s. She hates her glasses but personally I think they make her look adorable. She glances up at me as the computer screen reflecting in her glasses. “What?” She says. “Urm, nothing.” “I’m sure my stickers are very interesting, find a favourite?” “Ahahaha, I wasn’t looking at them.” “Ok what where you looking at then?” “Just you’re gorgeous face.” “Okay. You done staring and ready to get back into it?” Does this girl ever take a break. We haven’t stoped since we got here. Her milkshake remains untouched. She has ta

  • After Everything    21

    He fucked up, big time. I hope he knows who he’s dealing with. After coming home and seeing Addy so upset and then trying to stop Sutton from driving over to Carter’s or from Josie calling her dad to kick him off the team, which he totally deserves. But right now, we need to look after our girl. “Ok, let’s go.” I demand. “Where?” Josie asks. “Let’s just go.” “Em really?” Sutton remarks. “Yes really.” “She’s not ok.” Josie points out. “You don’t think I know that and can see that.” “Then where are we going?” “To get soft serves and to jam to breakup songs. Exactly what the heart ordered. Ok so come on, let’s go.” We are all in my car now. Josie has her best break up songs playing on FULL VOLUME through my speakers. I did this to just take Addy’s mind off things. Sitting in the apartment wallowing is fine. But she is a strong, independent, fierce women who don’t need no man so. “Fuck him.” I yell, throwing my middle finger to the sky. I pu

  • After Everything    22

    “Can we please just give up we have been at this for hours now?” I innocently ask Em. “Seriously. You have just laid there doing absolutely nothing.” “Hey, I helped with that point.” I say gesturing to her screen and the singular line that reads Session 5…. “You mean the same title we have used on each document we have so far. Yes. Thank you your help was invaluable. Really couldn’t have done it without you.” She says mocking me. “So can we give up for now?” “Yeah we can. I’m actually pretty hungry. Do you want to just stay since the weather is pretty crazy out there.” She asks with sly smirk on her face. “Yeah, I will. Should we order from Della’s?” “YES!” “The same as always?” “Um yeah how do you remember?” “I always remember with you.” “Ok, well everyone else is out so do we want to just hit up the movie room.” “What the fuck you have a movie room?” “Shit, I forget it’s not normal. But yeah we do.” I get up and follow Em down the hallway

  • After Everything    23

    “Get up, get up, get up. It’s date day.” “Ok Jos you have way to much energy for…” I half open my eyes to read me clock “for 7 in the morning.” “Sorry, it’s just my best friend is finally going on a date with Kingston James.” I roll over to further burrito myself in the blankets and warmth, but I hear a scrunch of paper under my head. What is that? Oh, it’s a note. Morning beautiful. Hope you slept well. Just letting you know you have the cutest little snore. I’ll see you tonight gorgeous. X King. “I do not snore.” I argue with the air since he’s no longer here. He must have had practice this morning, I did feel the faintest kiss on my forehead that must have been him. “You do snore a little but Em now is not the time for that debate. You have to get up. We are going to brunch and then we need to get you date ready.” She pulls me up and out of my bed. “Because right now, yeah that’s no okay.” She says gesturing to my grey sweats I stole from my b

  • After Everything    24

    She is breathtakingly gorgeous. In her simple long sleeve white dress. With Doc Martins. Absolutely freaking beautiful. And I get to take her out on a date. After handing the donuts to Josie, the look is certainly a sight (one she gave Austen this morning, so I know she loves him). I grab Em’s hand leading her towards my car. “I’m really sorry Jos hassled you yesterday and today. I will get her to delete your number.” “It’s fine she was a big help and she cares a lot about you. Also don’t tell her to delete it, I’m might need it sometime.” If everything works out and Em become’s mine after tonight. I might need Josie in the future because Em is someone I can see the whole future with. And as everyone keeps reminding girls like her don’t come around twice. “Oh ok. I won’t. So where are we going?” “A special place. It’s an Italian restaurant.” You are taking her there. You haven’t taken anyone there. This is a big deal, Kingston. Are you sure? Yes because looking

  • After Everything    25

    He leans in running his thumb along my cheek with a gentle stroke, the wave of butterflies are filling my entire body in anticipation. His touch finally jolts me, as he leans in and smashes his lips against mine. My mind finally aligns with my body as I move my arms and wrap them around his shoulders as his grabs my face between his hands to deepen the kiss. I feel this everywhere. Like everywhere. He is everywhere. In me. Around me. Consuming me. The kiss is everything. It is fucking amazing. We kiss and kiss and kiss. It feels like days and hours have passed but in reality it’s a matter of minutes and seconds. His scent. His warmth. His presence. It’s all filling me. It reaches into every crevice of my body and ignites it. I never want to stop kissing him, like ever. But reality draws in and we slowly detach our mouths from each other. As I move my arms to around his waist and he pulls me closer to his body, there isn’t an inch of space separating us. We stay here

  • After Everything    26

    We are together. Kingston and I we have been dating for a week now and to be honest we fell into it very easily. Nothing much changed from before, except for a lot more touching whenever we’re together and an increasing amount of intimacy when making out. We haven’t taken that next step. We will soon, but for our now we are riding the wave of our new found bliss. Today’s his first home game in a while, so I ditched Cole’s jumper for a new jumper with a ‘27’ and ‘James’ scrawled across the back. And well since Austen and Josie are now out in the open loved-up she is wearing his ‘13’ and ‘Cooper’ written in bold text across her back. We snapped a photo before the game with our guys before they hit the change-rooms. Addy and Sutton just have plain jerseys on now with no numbers of the back, I said they could wear Coles still but they opted out. I’m slowly starting to enjoy the sport more, it was dad’s thing and being surrounded by it is turning into a positive thing it’s like he’l

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  • After Everything    Epilogue

    REHEARSAL DINNER | the night before the wedding MATURE CONTENT | 18+ “We are getting married tomorrow. Like tomorrow.” Em says from her spot resting on my chest. “Yeah we are, surreal huh?” I respond. “Um yes, but I’m excited.” “Me too, no nerves?” “None not with you ever.” That makes my heart swell. “So you aren’t going to pull a Burke and leave me at the alter?” I ask referring to one of the many weddings on Greys. “Not at all, I want this so fucking much.” “Me too Em.” “I love you.” She whispers. “I love you more.” “How are your vows going?” She asks. Ugh those things, the declaration of love. Matrimony. They are coming along nicely but I just know Em’s are going to be like 1000 times better than mine. “Good. Yours?” I ask and she smirks. “I’m happy, Josie loves them so I hope you do too. Because there’s still time for Jos and I to run of into the sunset.” That’s not the first time either of them have mentioned their happily ever afte

  • After Everything    68

    Time flies when you are busy, overworked and exhausted. I feel like I blinked and now it’s a week out from my own wedding. I’m getting married to the love of my life in a week. I couldn’t be happier or more excited. But first, the bachelorette night courtesy of Josie my maid of honour. I knock on her apartment door, box in hand and question ready on my lips. “Oh Em you look nice, did you want Josie?” Austen asks opening the door to greet me. “Thank you and yes I would like my best friend.” “Did Kingston ask you yet?” “Yeah last night although I’m kind of sad I didn’t get a box too.” “Oh well, guess you don’t have the better best-friend.” That’s something we all fight over who has the better best-friendship, which duo is better. The sisters by love or brothers by choice. We don’t know. There will never to be a correct answer. Because really we are just a lucky bunch of people to be surrounded by amazing company that we get to share, live and love with.

  • After Everything    67

    “That’s not fair!” I shout as Em hits me again with the water gun. She continues until I surrender and throw her over my shoulder as she laughs at me. “Kingston put me down.” “What, baby?” She starts pinching my behind and I can’t reach her hand to slap it away. “Stop that.” “Well put me down now.” I throw her in the water. She breaks the surface and her stern gazes meets mine. “Not like that.” “You asked for it.” “I said put me down not toss me in the lake.” We are up at Miles’ vacation home in Cape Cod we have come the past two years as one big massive family. It has enough beds for everyone. We play games, cook together, laugh, have fun, it’s a tradition I don’t see us breaking anytime soon. This is sort of our last hoorah. All together. After this we all go our separate ways. Yeah we’ll stay in touch but it won’t be the same. Unless we all live near each other again. When we leave here tomorrow we will be making the journey to New York. Sin

  • After Everything    66

    There are future spoilers for other couples (who will eventually have their own stories). It’s hard writing this time for K&E and not talking about where their friends lives are at. They are all so close like a massive family. So read at your own discretion. Pause reading here, if you want to read Josie and Austen’s story from the beginning and not where they end up, I try keep it to a minimum, but again kind of hard since it effects King and Em directly. It’s up to you where you go from here! These chapters and this time was my favourite to write and are probably some of my best “Come on Em we are going to miss our flight if you don’t hurry up?” Kingston shouts from the bathroom. “Josie you too. Hurry up.” Austen adds. “Em what is taking so long?” “Just need to finish, last chapter…” “You have time for that on the plane, now get your butt in gear. Are you packed, do you have everything?” He says snatching my iPad from me. He pulls me into his chest. “Yes

  • After Everything    65

    6 MONTHS LATER… Graduation, baby. We finally did it. Boston U’s Class of 22! It’s been an amazing, adventurous, sweet, crazy journey. But we did. Us four girls stand hand in hand in their apartment before we finally head out to walk across the stage. After four years. All the ups and downs. Every party. Failed grade. Library study session. Coffee from Glazes. Hockey game. Sorority event. We made it through. Stronger and better than ever. We all have incredible futures ahead of us. Me as at nursing school. Josie at an internship for Vogue. Addison as a teacher at a prestigious school. Sutton at an insane PR and Marketing firm for Sports Professionals. I can’t believe we did it. I love these girls more than life itself. Without them this would have been a boring journey. We are sisters. Wherever we end up we will always have each other. “You girls ready to go?” Cole asks from his spot next to the door. He’s accompanied by Kingston, Austen and

  • After Everything    64

    We’ve enjoyed a perfect state of bliss bridging the gap between Christmas and New Years. We spent the time with Em’s family. It’s important for her mental health to spend time with them and during the semester it doesn’t happen that often. So we soaked up all the time we could with them. Along with bouncing back and forth to my parents as well. Over the past year our relationship has grown to new heights. All because of the girl next to me. She was the catalyst. The fighting force. My parents thank her every time. She just smiles and says sweet words in response. But she truly has no idea how strong they feel over this. Knowing I could have ended up like him scares them the most. But more importantly it scares me. We also took time and brought Cora and Tate with us. Since the two of them are two peas in a pod. It’s adorable honestly. Seeing them get along so well is amazing. We are home now. And tonight is party night. We are getting all dressed up and heading t

  • After Everything    63

    Christmas is in full swing at the Hale-Cooper and Fitzgerald-James apartment. Like it looks like Santa and his 12 reindeer threw up in our apartment. There are decorations everywhere. Not that I expected anything less from Josie. I mean she makes ‘Winter Wonderland’ her bitch. The tree is real for god sake. Real. Like pine and woody smelling. It fills the apartment day in and out. Oh and if that isn’t enough there is about 16 Christmas soy scented candles in our apartment. There’s bound to be 2 burning at all times in every room. The carols and music fill our speaker system in our apartment every morning 9am sharp. Then throughout the day its the alternating routine between music and movies. There are snacks always out. Candy canes. Hershey’s kisses with festive flavours. There is always a round of Pillsbury Christmas cookies in the cupboard and one in the oven. Oh and fresh ready to bake packet in the fridge. Just for safe keeping. In case we eat them all. We’ve b

  • After Everything    62

    It’s been a month since Em’s incident. It scared and terrified me. Receiving that phone call from Callum. I knew I shouldn’t have left her… I’m cooking dinner for us at home, the vegetables are prepped and chicken is cooking now. Josie is studying at the breakfast bar. Austen’s not home and Em isn’t home from the library either. “Not studying with Em today?” I ask Josie. “Nah cramps got really bad today, so I just decided to stay home. That smells good.” “Thanks.” “Ugh Kingston your phone is ringing.” “Does it say who it is?” “Callum. I think.” Miles’ boyfriend why would he be ringing me. “Pass it here.” “Alright.” She leans over and grabs it. “Hi Callum.” “Umm hi I’m with Emerson now, something’s happened. She needs you. We are on our way to the hospital now.” With that all the colour drains from me. Emerson, hospital, what the fuck. “Kingston what is it?” Josie asks worried. “Emerson something happened.” “What? Where.” “I don’t know we need to

  • After Everything    61

    “Damien, I can’t….. that……. I hate….. It hurts Damien, I can’t breathe…” “Emmy you’re ok, slowly in and out, there you go, you are safe now. You have a concussion, you are going to need stitches for the cut and will need some wrapping on your wrist.” “WHERE IS SHE?” I hear the familiar voice I love come down the hall. “Do you want to see him? He’ll understand if you don’t.” I just nod and squeeze his arm. “I love you Emmy, you’ll get through this. We’ll see Lily together alright. I’m not leaving you alone.” He enters to hallway leaving me with the nurse in the room. It’s protocol, I know that. Kingston enters the room and I can see his tear stricken eyes. “I’m so fucking sorry. Emerson. I should have been there. I should have. I’m so sorry.” “It’s not your fault.” “I know but I should have been there, I shouldn’t have left you there by yourself.” “How were you meant to know. I’ve done that many times. Just tonight something happened.” “It’s not your

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