Chapter 5

FOUR YEARS AGO

"I didn’t know you go here. I mean in this class.” He was taken aback, looking at me with those big doe eyes. "Wow, what a coincidence."

"You spilled coffee over me, yesterday. Remember?" I rolled my eyes at this handsome, dark-haired boy that has the best and the most river-like clear blue eyes I've ever seen. "It's not something one should forget easily."

“Oh, I know, I didn’t mean that. . . I meant I didn't know that you, too, have signed up for this class."

“Yes, I have. I’m minoring in it. You look like you’re doing the same thing, yeah, obviously.” I felt anxious talking to a stranger for the first time in a long while. Awkward.

“I didn’t think I’d ever see you again after what happened yesterday.” He let out a gust of wind from his lips. "At least not this soon."

“When I said, I guess so, I meant it.” I coughed and looked away. I wetted my lips, finding it uneasy to keep the conversation on. "By that I meant that I would see you around on the campus."

“Yeah, I guess so.” He laughed one of those cute boyish laughs that he must have saved for special people and rare occasions. "It's such a funny expression. I mean, you can't really guess anything for sure on someone's mind, can you?" He shrugged his shoulders. "I don't understand why people use this expression to begin or end their sentences."

“Knock it off! It's a surprise for me though. I didn’t know you attended this one class that I go to. I missed this class today by like five minutes. I was in no mood for this.” I faked-complained in order to be charming. "But I dragged myself to class, anyway."

“Oh wow, so why did you make it here, then?” The dark-haired guy, who spilled the coffee on my shirt yesterday, was in front of me, really in front of me, talking casually with me and, dare I say, looking very dapper in his V-neck black t-shirt, which accentuated his broad shoulders and rippling muscles. Just a twitch in his upper arm was reason enough for him to flex those specs without trying. It was very apparent that he was a gym lover and the only exercise I ever did was crying and overeating cupcakes in bed after two months of my recent breakup, which also happened to be my first most serious heartache. "Did someone threaten you?" He gestured to my friend sitting on the other side of the row, shooting me a death glare from her eyes. "Like that girl who keeps staring at you."

“Of course, she did threaten me since she threatens me everyday. She's my best friend." Then I laughed hoarsely. "By the way, it's my favorite class. There is no denying it. And, there’s no reason I wouldn’t make it. Even though I'm sacrificing a lot of my sleep for this class in the mornings, it still has been such a life savior. I love literature and am waiting for the discussion of this play Look Back In Anger to start again in class,” I added, getting lost in my love for books somewhere on the way. "I have found it completely fascinating, so it takes me a while to shut up about it."

“I love that play! Jimmy is so sarcastic. I love his dry sense of humor.” I saw his long nose twitch and I pushed loose strands of my hair behind my ear, totally forgetting the fact that it made me look like a potato. "I was pleasantly surprised when I was reading it."

“You totally get my drift, then. People will think he’s a bully and, apparently, he is kinda, somewhat, but that guy is one hell of a kind,” I said, thinking deeply about this fictitious character who was taking too much space in my head. "He's not entirely a bad guy, but from the looks of it, he sure comes off like it."

“And he has the most amazing criticism for his wife’s family,” he agreed, amused. "I couldn't stop laughing at some part of the text."

“There’s that, for sure.” I felt a genuine smile creeping up my face because it was not every day I could have stimulating and intelligent conversations with guys who looked this good. "What do you think of his treatment towards his wife?"

“I guess I would’ve loved the main character more if he was a bit less aggressive." He stated the fact and I found myself agreeing with it internally, even though I was so defensive about the main character, Jimmy. Already changing for a guy, Lee. You go girl. "He almost comes off as stiff and abrasive, at places."

“Yeah, I second that, but it’s just how he’s wired, you know, in desperate want and need of affection from his wife even after three years of marriage, since he’s totally attracted to her and she’s like nada. No reaction,” I scoffed.

“But that doesn’t mean he has to be verbally abusive towards her? See, I don’t agree with you on that.” He blew out a loud sigh. "He should have treated his wife better and have tried to reason with her in gentler words. It's possible if he had tried to go down that route."

“You know what?" He scratched the tip of his nose. "I am at two pieces with my own reasoning. It may seem like he’s bullying her, I mean he's Jimmy, since he’s the kind of guy who's loud-mouthed but… it's the wife who’s the real bully in their household.” Then he situated his glance on me. "What do you think about that? Do you agree with the fact that I just said?"

My mind was blown at his statement. He was killing me in a good way with his intelligence. It sounded like I should change my perspective once in a while. I needed to be open-minded. What if he suggested a foursome randomly? Well, not that open-minded. Unless that was what I really wanted.

“You really think so?” I went ahead and became my weird self again and tried to make sure, at the expense of it killing the conversation. "I honestly don't know."

“Yeah, I resonate with that… or else, why would he be so affectionate towards her?” He looked at me from behind his long lashes and, for a moment, I got lost in his handsome boyish face. Get a grip. I needed to get one of those. "There's no other reason for him to be this affectionate with her when she keeps completely disregarding him."

The dark-haired guy was raking his hand in his hair and before I could answer, Mr. Freyer entered the classroom and interrupted our conversation. I realized that I was still standing, hovering around his bench and intimidating him into a conversation. But, from the looks of it, there was no way a girl like me could ever intimidate him. He had this whole relaxed, easy aura, and confidence about him that made me a little bit jealous of him. 

Can we exchange the confidence you exude?

Mr. Freyer was clearing his throat and everybody was taking their seats. I realized that there was just one empty seat beside him, so I took it and melted beside him on that metal bench. His sexy shoulders touched mine while he was adjusting in his seat, and goosebumps flared up on the bare skin of my spaghetti straps top that I was wearing. 

This is not good. Not good. Not good. Not good.

Our teacher turned around with his blue marker to the whiteboard and continued to drone on the principles of mystical energy in poetry and art, and I tried to control my breathing because I could feel my heart beating loudly, colliding against the walls of my chest. I edged slightly on the farthest of my metal seat as much as I could, making sure that no parts of his body touched mine. That kind of electricity was never worth any pain.