“I fvcking tried. I swear. I just can’t do it because I don’t get it.” I almost cried my eyes out while I’m in front of my boss, explaining the reason why I had a breakdown session in my cubicle earlier.
“My god, Samsara. How are you still this dumb despite being in this industry for two years?” My boss suddenly pinched my ear causing me to react by stepping back.
I looked at him offensively, and then, my sudden rush of emotion came—
“Ouch! That’s abuse, you know!? Do you want me to report to you!?”
When I realized what just came out of my mouth, I even cried harder until there’s fountain of tears coming out from my eyes. I think that the only thing that’s left for me to do to completely embarrass myself is to have a tantrum session right here.
“What did you just say?” My boss is now looking at me as if he wants to beat me into paralyzation/
If his eyes were naturally large, they seemed even bigger now. I had no idea that they could get any larger.
"Why did you pinch my ears? Is that correct, considering that you are the b-boss?” I kept my whimper on my lungs so he would not see me much weaker– and a crybaby..
He closed his eyes and sighed before speaking, "I'm asking you, Samsara. Is it right that you fought with the customer? It would have been okay if you were handling a regular account, but you're on an exclusive one! My god. Out of all the people you could have picked a fight with, a VIP? My God. You're fired!"
My coworkers almost walked in on the scene because of their stares. For sure, they heard and knew that I no longer had a job.
But knowing me, I could not go down without fighting for my rights.
"But sir— I still have 6 months left on my contract." I tried to defend myself.
He threatened to hit me again so I turned my head away. "Are you still going to talk? Don't you understand me? Get out!"
When he said that, I knew that I can’t do anything anymore. If I speak even one more word, I know that he’s just going to get more angry.
The moment I exited the office, I was greeted by different stares. So what, bitches? What if I embarrassed myself and lost my job on the same day? Argh.
When I approached my cubicle, I felt Sean’s hand rubbing my back. “Wait for me outside when you finish gathering your things. I’ll drive you home.” He offered.
“Okay, Sean. I appreciate it.” I quietly said, having no energy left on my body anymore.
I don’t have many things in my cubicle. Mostly just notebooks, sticky notes, and colorful pens.
It’s because I like to write poems while I wait for calls from our entitled and out of touch VIP customers and members of my company– I mean, my ex- company.
The salary at work might be high, but it feels like they're taking little pieces of my soul everyday that I have spent here due to their attitude. I don't know how I managed to endure this industry for two years.
Oh, it's because I'm the breadwinner.
My parents and siblings are in the province. I'm supporting three siblings, so I wasn't able to finish my studies.
I used to dream of becoming a flight attendant. I was just two years away from getting my diploma in tourism management. But due to my high tuition f*e, my parents struggled so much, so I had no choice but to stop studying.
One day, a friend invited me to Manila to work. I figured why not, instead of enduring my three hundred fifty pesos daily wage at the wet market, which is not enough for my siblings' allowance and mom's high blood pressure medicine.
Now? That friend? She is rich-rich. Like crazy rich. I have no idea what job she did, but I want that job, whatever it is. What I know is that she suddenly joined something and ended up marrying a wealthy guy. I hardly even talk to her anymore.
As I was leaving the office, I turned right, towards the pantry. Food is free here when you're on duty.
Welp– I’m still on duty, right? They haven't officially fired me yet because I haven't even stepped out of the door.
Whose rule is that? Mine.
I grabbed the four tupperware containers I brought. Sometimes, I forget my food container in the office, so earlier, I found four containers in my locker.
While I’m alone in the pantry, I filled the tupperware relentlessly. I stuffed whatever I saw until it was almost impossible to close the lid of the tupperware.
Damn all of you. You can starve on this shift and I’m going to take most of your food.
I didn't spare the creamers and flavoring powders either. I squeezed them into the remaining space until it almost overflowed.
When I was satisfied, I headed down to the parking lot and waited for Sean to come out.
"What the heck? Did you go shopping while waiting for me?" He immediately said upon seeing the box and tupperware in the back of the car.
"They fired me. You expect me to leave empty handed? That's not happening. Plus, I have no food at the apartment. I might as well add sinigang mix to my water and call it a meal." I complained.
It's true though. My siblings' projects are all due around the same time. And I'm still saving up for Tonton's tuition, my next sibling.
He wants to study engineering but he didn't pass the entrance exams for state universities and public colleges, so I have no choice but to send him to a private school. It's better than him stopping his education, it would be a waste of time.
I can handle it. I just need to be patient.
"What's your plan, Sam? You're so stubborn. You should have kept quiet instead of speaking out." Sean scolded me.
"Nah, you don;t understand. It's so stressful and I'm really burned out. Maybe it’s meant to be that I got fired because of that damn customer so I could rest." I complained.
I opened the wafer I got from the office as Sean started driving.
"Sam, your 'meant to be' isn't enough because you're supporting so many people. Your meant to be mentality will not feed you or pay your bills either. Let me help you find a job." Sean offered.
"All right.. I might need a few days of rest at home though. Send me some food, okay? You know I have no more stock."
"Of course . I'll take care of it. Just don’t do anything stupid." After saying that, he fell silent.
Whenever I have a problem, Sean is there. Probably because he's rich. He just works for fun. His parents are doctors. So no matter what happens, he is financially stable.
Wish everyone had a safety net, right?
"Stop here, Sean. Thanks." I unloaded the box and tupperware from the car and placed them by the side of the road. My apartment is on the second floor, so it's a bit difficult to carry everything at once.
"No problem. Like I said, I got you." He replied.
"My meal tomorrow, okay?" I reminded him.
"Yeah, yeah. You're crazy. I think I'll go insane with what you're doing with your life. Goodbye, my unemployed friend." He teased before leaving.
I brought up the box first before the tupperware. And as I lay on the bed, I thought about my parents and siblings, especially Tonton. I only have two weeks left to come up with the down payment for his college. I only have seven thousand in the bank. My cash is only three fifty. I still have to pay rent, water, and electricity.
And now there's this damn disconnection notice on my wifi.
Why wasn't I born rich? Why couldn't my family be rich?
Most of all, why am I the one burdened with so much responsibility?
In the middle of my thoughts, my phone suddenly rang.
"Hello? Who's this?" I asked.
To my surprise, a rich sounding woman's voice spoke on the phone.
"This is Avon from Miss Night. I was asked to call you. Said you might be needing a job." What an expensive voice.
"Sorry? I think you have the wrong number. I already have a job." I lied. What if this is a scam?
"Samsara Angela Sakura. Half Filipino, Half Japanese. Based on the report I'm holding right now, you were fired earlier due to customer service mishandling of an exclusive VIP partner of your company. I can also clearly see that before exiting the office, you almost emptied half of the shelves in your pantry's office. Am I right?"
I was stunned and couldn't speak. How does she know all of that legally?
"Wait a minute! Who are you? Are you some kind of thug?" I angrily said.
"As I said, Ms. Sakura. I am Avon from Miss Night and I am offering you a job." She said, also annoyed.
"Well, what job is that? You haven't even said it.”
"I can't tell you what it is on the phone. We will send you an agent tomorrow. Have a good night and get some sleep." She said before hanging up.
Send me an agent tomorrow? Is she crazy? I didn't even agree with what she said. I knew it was a scam.
I ignored the call and prepared myself to sleep.
I need to make the most of my rest before I dive into job hunting.
Honestly, being poor is tough. I wish I could just marry a millionaire.