Novels by DREAMALITTLEFIC

//If someone was to ask me why I write so much about you, or about love in general I would have no answer. What must I say? That you consume all over? Or does my love for you do that? How do I tell them that I had been so far banished from intimacy in all stages of my life that the mere sight of it feels like an opportunity to be grabbed? How do I tell a stranger that there is so much pain, so much suffering I've witnessed, been a part of, that I can't let out of my chest? It's like a dragon, chased and locked up in a cage so small it has compressed itself. How do I tell them that if I were to twist the cage's lock open, I'm afraid I'll never be able to close it again? That it'll chase away all that is left of me? All that I want to have and to be? I wonder if you'd be able to look past it, look past the green moss over my mind, past the rusting on my heart and finally see what I've been hiding? The little boy that had been far too afraid of what they said was 'love'.&nb

"Sometimes I wonder what's the point of this, everything after her but then I see you smile, listen to your laughter and let u kiss me. That's when, for a brief moment, I see. I see the point.The rain settles deep into my bones, I ache for things I do not know, things I did not know I could want. The door to my studio is open, you sit with your laptop spread out in front of you and I stare. I stare and find meaning in life once again. How much longer do I have to pretend that I do not love her?""Oh god Young Jae, all of this is so beautiful," She huffed a little. "You need to put it out in the world. I had no idea of the extent of pain you were going through. I just- God, I am so sorry.""You know, Noona, People say they want their lovers or more precisely, their loved ones to never hurt but when you were in Paris I used to wish that you did. I wished that the ache I have in my chest bounced off yours a

"I drive past that empty house sometimes, I wonder if I'll ever see you again. If you'll ever see me again. The lump in my throat is enough for me to turn around but I wish you'd see me somewhere and be brave enough to call out my name. The goodbye I didn't get to say lays crumpled up in a letter and in the texts I haven't sent to you. The agony of knowing you lay in someone's arms like you did in mine, is enough for me to have blinked my eyes clear of this fog. But oh god, my pens bleed onto paper, my thumbs bruise up against the keyboard. You are everything I write and i have become the ink that bleeds. No matter how much I struggle, even breaking through my shell, I leak all over the paper, still bleeding. And when the paper is flipped, the ink spots prettier than words ever could. They ask you to wipe me down but you too, are helpless as you gesture vaguely with your

The post wedding dinner was fun to say the least.The table was occupied by all the important people in their lives and a few acquaintainces were on the other table to their right. The couple sat next to each other, Minjae's hand clasped tightly in Young Jae's as if she could run away at ay given moment. Joon had wanted to make a joke about it but resorted to staying quiet for once.Hyun was sitting directly opposite to Young Jae on the circular table, poking around with this tteotbokki like it was as tasteless as it could get. Kim watched him lose focus a couple of times and frowned at the plate of food in front of him. Tteotbokki was his favourite, every single person around him knew that. What had caused this gloomy atmosphere over his head? Hyun seemed like he had come to terms with this reality a few weeks ago.Why the long face now?"Are you sure you are okay, Hyun? You have barely to

That’s how their dinner went, the two of them talking to one another with no shame, no filters, just complete utter love between them, and when it was time for dessert, Minjae got up and pulled a cake trolly in. It wasn’t until she poured him yet another glass of wine that he grew suspicious of her. Was she okay? Was she hiding something?“Hey Young-Jae, don’t mind but I would like it if you stay quiet for another ten minutes, kay? I need to get this done,” he hesitantly nodded, settling the glass back on the table and leaned back in his seat. “Ugh, oh my god, I’ve never been more nervous.”“Just say it-“ “Shut up.”He pursed his lips together, squinting his eyes at her th

“Fucking hell Min, you drive me crazy,” she moaned, hips dragging up against his crotch. Young-Jae shrugged tilting his head to the side with his tongue poking his cheek and the new surge of confidence had her knees weak. Does he have a glow up every week?Was that even possible?“Do I now? Why don’t show me how crazy at home?”, he teased cocking his head to signify that they were almost home. Her heartbeat shot up and for the first time, the infamously confident Minjae felt nervous. She felt as if Young-Jae was too attractive to be hers but now that he was, Jae couldn’t give him up for the world. So, with a nod and a gulp, they were tangled together on their bed.

I watch Sophie fix her hair in the mirror for the millionth time and feel myself smile even through the nervousness that pumped in my blood both because of how beautiful she looked and also because of what was about to happen.It wasn't the first time but I couldn't bring myself to not worry about going up to the stage and speak in front of at least hundred people that were invited to the summit I had willingly asked to be a part of. She sighs and stomps her feet before draping herself over the royal blue couch next to my similarly designed seat. "Just leave it alone, you look perfect just like that."She picks her head back up from where it was lolling at the back of the couch and scowls directly at me. "Easy for you to say, you just have to comb yours once and you're good to be. God! I'm so jealous of men sometimes," Sophie complains even though I knew she didn't mean it."Well, sweetheart, I think you're forgetting that women too can get the

"You guys are really all going to sleep here?", my mouth was wide agape in bewilderment of my friends' weird request as they all nodded, not bothering to look away from the screen. "Well then, two of you can take the room upstairs, I'll sleep down here," I shrug and settle down on the round chair in front of Mrs. Kim and Kate."No, you sleep in your room and we take the living room," Mr. Min states in a no-nonsense tone, completely ridding me of any excuses. "It's your birthday, go have some 'me' time or whatever.""First of all, it's Nathan's room and my birthday is tomorrow," I dead-pan, picking at the hem of Nathan's shirt to busy myself and keep my thoughts away. "I'll have a whole lot of me time tomorrow, don't worry.""But what's the difference? What's his is yours and what's yours is his," Kate shrugged, nonchalantly throwing me a smile as she leaned back in her seat on the couch."Oh he's definitely not worrying and your bi

"Good morning Sophie," Kate hums softly from the other side of the room and I hum back, not having enough energy and still half asleep to reply to her greeting. "I'll be on the lawn if you need me.""Okay," I mumble, finally, and then her footsteps faded into the distance. Once again, the room felt too quiet and solemn without Nathan's warm presence in it. Gathering all my energy, I get up and stop in a sitting position on the bed, smiling softly at the drawn curtains.Who would've known, Nathan's habit of keeping the curtains drawn originated from Kate? I yawn and stretch my arms up to feel the satisfying pop of my muscles after a tiring night with all the guys and then having to drive back, completely exhausted. My head thrummed with a slight headache and I wondered if it was some sort of handover.Nah, maybe just lack of sleep.I find myself slipping down the bed and towards the bathroom in haste to brush the weird morning breat

My fingers tightened around the warm cup of coffee, it's temperature already helping with the shriveling cold outside even through my knitted gloves. They were a gift from Kate, she had been into knitting a few weeks back and made a cute couple on the back of them.The coffee shop was newly opened next to the Yongsan Seoul Hospital. I often came around to grab a cup of coffee for myself when I was particularly lonely or stressed out. The doorbell that chimed whenever somebody entered the shop made it's signature sound again and I ignored it, picking up a packet of brown sugar to rip it open and added it to my coffee."Didn't you already put two?", Hearing Mr. Min's voice, I jump up in surprise before a smile causes my cheeks to hurt. He smiles back at me, pointing his finger between the two already empty packets of sugar lying on the table. "You shouldn't put in so much, it's like aiming for diabetes.""I don't do that always," I lie, rolling m

"Is that-" he tremors."Yes," I assure."Are they-" he begins again."Yup," I confirm, last letter popping.Seok-Min was star-struck. He couldn't take his eyes off the three men huddled on the couch together for a whole minute. It wasn't like this was the first time Nathan had bumped into a fan or have somebody struck like that but there was a certain rawness to Seok-Min that made him shy.Maybe it was the fact that the past few days had been so rough on him that he didn't expect anybody to care about him anymore. He probably didn't expect the news announcer to be that whipped for him but it wasn't news to the rest of us. The man had literally defended Nathan on national television and risked his job trying to protect his name."Hey," Nathan chirps out, quietly and shyly rubbing the back of his head. I watch as Seok-Min smiles happily and I gesture for him to sit down once he had returned all their greetings."

It's five in the morning, my head rests back against Nathan's chest, we both have been talking for the whole night now, three hours washed away in love and unresolved matters. His back is against the headboard of my bed and the window is open ajar to let the chilly wind it.It seems like it might rain in the next few hours and I want nothing than to just lie down for one more day, waste a few more hours talking to him before we need to get up and face reality. Reality that there were lot of untangled ropes in our lives that were swirled around."Hey, Nat?", he hums, tightening his arm around my front. "Can I take up a nursing job or something? You know, I'll have to get my license and work," I trail off, feeling smaller with every silent second that passed by."What made you think you needed permission for that?", he asks, voice sharp and seemingly offended. "Do you think I have autonomy over your life? I can't believe you sometimes Soph."