yo mama so old jokes

Landon Mikaelson knew he made a terrible mistake when he let his wife out the door and out of his life permanently. It was supposed to be an arranged marriage between the both of them. A deal to act like a married couple for a year and a half but circumstances began to pave way for mutual feelings he didn't want. So he divorced her and let her go which turned his life around for the worse but something takes him to her door and making him plead for a second chance,a secret kept by her that changed their lives forever. What is it??. Well find out yourself.

The story of a bastard prince turned Alpha King and his fake mate. To the world, it’s a fairytale of a prince and a maid. In reality, it’s a sham. Killian is known as the bastard prince, a murderer believed to have killed his brother for the throne. Cold and merciless, Killian firmly believes only fools love but on a whim, he announces a random maid as his mate to avoid a political marriage. Then his beliefs begin to change. Carrot is fleeing her abusive mate who, not only rejected her, but also tried to kill her and then sold her off to an old, perverted Alpha. She runs to the capital and renames herself Amethyst. Working as a palace maid, she is scrubbing the ground one day when the Alpha Prince takes one look at her and declares her his mate. A lie. In public, Killian dotes on Amethyst but in private, he ignores her existence. He crowns her as his queen and they continue their fake relationship until their lies unravel as the truth. They are true mates. Can Amethyst open her heart to a man who disregarded her from the start? They may be true mates but with a woman deadset on having Killian, a disgraced dowager queen determined to avenge her son and the awakening of Amethyst’s hybrid powers, how long can their relationship last?

Twenty-two years old, Aurora Torres suddenly disappeared when she learned that her father made an agreement that was against her will. She had a simple life away from her parents, but after two years of being separated from them, she was forced to return because her father needed her help. Upon her return, she openly accepted the wedding arrangement of a stranger named, Damien Harrison. Even before their marriage, they both agreed to make a rule— their marriage was only up to a piece of the paper. Will Aurora and Damien's business marriage last for a lifetime? Or will they end up never falling in love with each other?

ADESSA: I should have known better that nothing good lasts forever. Especially for someone like me—a lowly, orphaned Omega. The last year has been so perfect that I thought I had finally found my place in this world, right in the arms of my mate, Alpha Kael. Kael chose me to be his Luna out of revenge to the female who broke his heart. His reasons didn't matter to me. And though I knew he could never love me the same way he loved Desiree, I have nothing to complain about. Kael was the ideal mate—the perfect Alpha. I was lucky to be his. I was so immersed in the bubbles of my perfect world that I forgot he was never mine in the first place. When tragedy struck, and he awoke with no memory of us, I found myself alone in the shambles of my dreams, witnessing the man I loved walk away with the woman who had broken him. In the blink of an eye, I was back in the same place I was before I met him. KAEL: My life has always been perfect. I am the Alpha of one of the strongest packs on this side of the country and betrothed to the woman who will be the perfect Luna to stand beside me. So when I woke up with no memory of the last two years of my life, married to a woman I had never met and couldn't remember, I began to question everything around me. I wanted nothing to do with her. She is not the Luna I envisioned to end up with. ¤¤¤¤¤ THIS IS A STANDALONE NOVEL AND NOT CONNECTED TO MY PREVIOUS BOOKS/SERIES.  Follow me on my socials for updates and teasers — author.cassa.m.

In her five years of marriage, Elsie loved her husband, Oswald, with all her heart. Even when their life wasn't happy. But now the man she loves so much is looking at her with a hateful look, slandering her without proof. "Tess is awake, she told me everything! You fu*king murderer!" Tess, Oswald's beloved woman, and if she hadn't had the accident, it would have been Tess, not her, who would have become Oswald's wife. And now Tess was awake. Her dream had awakened instead. She didn't want to have to explain. She didn't want to have to go through countless detentions and begging... Elsie looked at Oswald, who was still indifferent, and said, "Let's get a divorce..." Oswald doesn't believe that the greedy Elsie can give up her life as a rich madam, and he assumes that she will come back and beg him for money. Until Elsie's true identity is revealed and everyone is stunned...

“Don’t make me repeat myself twice, part those legs for me, Bunny.” His deep voice which always sends my brain reeling due to how silky it sounds, washed over me slowly as he murmured quietly against my throat. I tried to point out to him that there was no way I’d be able to do as told with his legs still pinning mine down, but the words died down in my throat when he sucked the skin over my beating pulse into his mouth. “Go on. You want to be good for me, don’t you?” “I— I do.” I choked out, letting out a breathy whimper when he wrapped his free hand around my throat and squeezed on it a little. ——— Forced to marry the ruthless mafia lord, whom everyone was afraid of at the age of eighteen, Sofia had no other choice but to follow her father’s wishes like a dutiful daughter was supposed to. While Luca Ricci only took a wife, because he wasn’t getting any younger at the age of thirty-three. She was the angel to his demons, the light to his darkness, the innocence to his sins… He wanted to protect her, since the moment he locked eyes with hers on their wedding day and saw the amount of fright brewing in it. He wanted to make her good for him, to mark her as his; with his handprints on her ass and his cum dripping off her face. To own her completely, to wrap his hand around her throat and do so many sinful things to her body. But he was the mafia lord, and danger just seems to be lurking around him, wherever he goes, and in whatever he does. He must protect his wife at all costs.

BLURB "Boss, these are the pictures of the lady's face. It's a good thing the hotel's Surveillance camera captured her perfectly." Davis uttered as he placed the file containing the pictures in front of him. With a deep frown on his face, he picked up the file and carefully brought out the pictures. He gasped at the young lady with Grey eyes, plump lips, and platinum blonde hair. She's the epitome of beauty. "I need every information about her by tomorrow. " Tristan Zachary ordered with his voice as cold as ice. "Okay boss " Davis immediately exited out of the well-furnished office. The moment the office door was shut, Tristan stared into space lost in thought. #Flashback# Tristan groaned as he felt so much ache in his head. He managed to sit up on the hotel's bed while gazing around in awe. With the lingering feminine scent that hit his nose, and seeing he was stark naked, Realization struck him hard. He immediately knew a lady was on his bed last night. Due to his drunken state, he couldn't identify the mysterious lady's face. A lady that was an exception from other ladies, Tristan still finds it hard to believe he had gotten that close to a lady without feeling sick. He instantly wants to find the lady and confirm his fears. "Davis" Tristan calls out as the room door was instantly pushed open by his assistant. "Boss" Davis uttered with a bow of his head. "You saw a lady step out of this room right?" He couldn't help the anxiety in his voice. Davis knew his boss has a phobia for ladies, and was taken aback by his sudden outburst.

At 18, He asked her to accompany him to the prom and she agreed because she liked him. At 23, He asked her to pretend to be his girlfriend, and she agreed because she loved him. At 25 he asked her to be his fiancee and she agreed, all because she wanted him to be hers forever. But now at 27, he's decided to break the 2 years of engagement to marry his true love and this time he did not ask. He simply decided that it was all over and he didn't need her. All the years, she followed him like a lovesick puppy only to get her heart broken mercilessly. The fairy tale she was living in vanished with just a simple blink. But too bad, she knew how to cure her broken heart and stand up again. But then what's wrong with him? Why is he behaving like a possessive fiancé all of sudden? Why the sudden change of heart? Shouldn't he be with his lover instead of trying to hold her captive? Wasn't he the one who said she's not the one for him and he didn't want her? Why was he behaving like a jealous husband? Does it mean The Cold-Hearted CEO Wants Her Back? _____________________ ________

Unloved. Unwanted. Abandoned. Those words have followed Kayla since birth. Abandoned by her pack as a pup and left for dead in the woods she was taken in by the Cedar Wood pack. Raised as their servant and deemed a runt too weak to hunt with the pack, her life is one of servitude and that's all it'll ever be. That's all she's worth. Or at least that's what people keep telling her. So why does the visiting Alpha of the most powerful pack ever to roam the land keep looking at her and what is he whispering about?

Harlyn thought her life would finally change for the better after a night with the alpha king who marked her, claiming her to be his. If only she knew what awaited her. She was supposed to be a quick lay, to satisfy his urge but it felt so good to be with her that he lost his senses for a moment and sank his fangs into her neck, marking her and accidentally claiming her as his. But he couldn’t keep her, she was of no use to him socially, she was a lonely orphan who wasn’t able to fully transform after she turned eighteen and therefore had no place in his elite life. He was the alpha king and he could only pick a mate that matched his status. There was only one thing to do. Reject her. That didn’t play out like he had imagined. And just like that, a whole new journey begins for the both of them.