funny joke tagalog tanong

Nang malaman ni Jillian na buntis siya, dalawang buwan pagkatapos magkaruon ng aksidenteng pakikipagtalik sa isang estranghero, na akala niya ay si Brent na kanyang boyfriend, yun pala ay ibang lalaki. Nang hanapin niya ang lalaking may kagagawan ng kanyang pagbubuntis, tinanggihan siya nito dahil may hinihintay itong ibang babae. Na stress siya na nagdulot ng pagdurugo during her pregnancy kaya kinailangan siyang dalhin sa ospital. Paggising niya, natagpuan niya ang sarili sa hospital na kasama ang pinakamayamang babae sa mundo na si Madam Lishou. Sa halip na magalit, ininsist ni Madam Lishou ang isang kasal sa pagitan ni Jillian at ng kanyang apo na si Mckenzie. Nalaman kasi nito sa isang source na ang apo nito ang nakabuntis sa kanya. Tumanggi ang lalaki na pakasalan siya, nagalit si Madam Lishou at binantaan ang lalaki na itatakwil kung hindi ito magpapakasal sa kanya. Napilitang pumayag ang lalaki sa kondisyon na civil lamang sila ikakasal. Habang nagkakalapit ang loib nilang mag asawa, biglang nagparamdam ang dalawang tao mula sa kanilang nakaraan, si Tamara na nagnanais na muling mabawi si Mckenzie at si Brent na handa siyang tanggapin ulit sa kabila ng kalagayan niya. Paano ito makakaapekto sa kanilang pagsasama? Sila ba'y paglalayuin ng pagkakataon, o magtatagumpay sila sa harap ng mga pagsubok, na nagpapalakas ng kanilang pagsasama sa paglipas ng panahon?

Kirey hanyalah pegawai biasa. Minim prestasi dan tidak cantik. Namun, dia selalu saja membuat jengkel Gio, President Director di perusahaan tempatnya bekerja. Pria tampan dengan sejuta pesona dan prestasinya dalam mengelola bisnis itu justru begitu penasaran dengan sikap yang ditunjukkan Kirey kepadanya. Ada saja perilaku Kirey yang menyebalkan di mata Gio namun membuat pria itu selalu rindu bertengkar dengannya. Bagaimana mungkin wanita biasa itu tidak tertarik dan menolak pria macam Gio yang digilai para wanita? Suatu hari, keadaan telah memaksa Kirey harus berurusan dengan Gio. Keluarga Kirey terlilit utang ratusan juta rupiah dan satu-satunya cara yang bisa Kirey lakukan adalah menikah dengan Gio. Pernikahan kontrak dengan imbalan yang cukup fantastis bagi Kirey pun menjadi pilihan terakhir untuknya. Dengan begitu, dia dan keluarganya akan terbebas dari utang dan keluar dari kemiskinan. Setelah menikah, Kirey malah semakin membenci Gio. Ketika tahu suaminya itu ada hubungan dengan si pemilik utang yang membuat keluarga Kirey bangkrut dalam semalam. Tidak hanya itu, Kirey menyembunyikan cinta untuk pria lain di hatinya. Tanpa sepengetahuan Gio. Penasaran, kan? Ikuti terus kisah perjalanan pernikahan Kirey dan Gio dalam“Me VS Mr. Presdir”.

Bumukas ang malaking pintuan sa harap ko, at narito ang lalaking minamahal ko, ang mata'y walang damdamin habang lumalapit ako sa altar. Ngumiti ako kahit na masikip ang dibdib ko. Narinig ko ang musika habang dahan-dahang naglalakad patungo sa lalaking naghihintay sa harap. Si Kiel, nakatitig nang seryoso sa akin. Walang kahit anong kasiyahan ang makikita sa kanyang mukha, at ito'y nagdulot ng kirot sa aking puso. Iniharap ko ang aking kamay, ngunit itinuring niyang wala ito at agad na umusad patungo sa harap ng pari. Iniwan akong nakatambad ang kamay sa ere. Yumuko ako, bahagyang nahihiya. Sumunod ako sa harap ng pari, at sinimulan na ang misa. "Maari mo nang halikan ang iyong asawa," ang sabi ng pari. Humarap ako kay Kiel, inaasahan ang isang halik sa labi, ngunit sa pisngi lamang ito dumapo. "Nakuha mo na ang titulong Mrs. Valerian, ngunit tiyak kong hindi mo makukuha ang aking pagmamahal," bulong niya. Pumikit ako, at naramdaman ang sakit sa aking puso. "Tandaan mo 'yan, Sam? Hindi mo makukuha ang aking pagmamahal dahil may iniibig na ako," dagdag niya habang nagpalakpakan na ang mga tao. Tumulo ang isang butil na luha. "Sarap mong pagmasdan habang umiiyak," layo na nito sa akin pagkatapos ng mga salitang iyon at agad na lumabas ng simbahan. Pinalis ko ang luha ko at mag-isang ngumiti sa harap ng mga taong masaya para sa amin. Kumikirot ang dibdib ko sa likod ng aking mga ngiti. Daig ko pa ang sinaksak, ngunit hindi ko pinahalata. "Saan pupunta ang asawa mo?" inosenteng tanong ng isang matanda. Ngumiti ako, ngunit hindi na nagbigay ng pagsasalita. "Baka excited lang," mapanukso ng isa. Tumawa ako, kahit na parang pinipiga ang puso ko. Ako si Samantha Alexandria Perez, o dapat bang sabihin Samantha Alexandria Perez Valerian, and I am his unwanted wife.

WARNING: R-18 l MATURE CONTENT l SPG l VERY SEXUAL l READ RESPONSIBLY No woman could tame a Sandoval like Gaston Pierre, but she did so without even realizing it. The playboy son of a powerful family in Davao vowed to himself that he would not be involved with any woman. For him, women are simply distractions. Before meeting her, he used to play around. Everything around him is a joke, all in good fun. But when he met the young and innocent woman in their hacienda, everything changed. Her innocence and pure heart enchanted him. She redefined his life. He now sees life differently than he did before. She gave him direction, a guide. Camilla is now the light of his life, his everything. But, like all love stories, theirs was tested. Fate played a part. An accident happened. He lost his sight. Living in the dark for years, he punished himself and sought no refuge. He enjoyed living in darkness because it allowed him to see the light. In the darkness, he can see her shine. She's the only light that has kept him alive for years. She is the only star he wants to see every night, but she is nowhere to be found. How long will he wait? Can he still find what's missing? Will the stars align to give another chance to the love they failed to protect? Or will he forever live in darkness, unable to see the brightest stars tonight?

Night Stalker Series 3: Forrest Wood is an enigmatic tattooed bartender who lives in two worlds to protect someone he loves. He never questions his self-control over temptations while searching for answers for half his life. Until something has changed in a woman, he’s been keeping tabs for a while. When he’s finally ready to deal with his feelings, he knows nothing can be easy in his life—it only complicates his plans and his secrets that Megan might not accept who truly he is. A flirty, blunt, and funny, Megan Simons built her walls over relationships until her life crumbles down in front of her. Forrest comes to the rescue. She finds him intriguing and beyond attractive. When she starts bringing her walls down, she finds herself in a situation where Forrest Wood is more than what meets the eye.

New girl Cierra makes a big impression with the popular kids on her first day at High Moon High School.When Titan takes a shine to her, will it blossom or will there be a spanner or two in the works.When Cierra meets the leaders of her new group of friends, she learns quickly that she would rather live like them than without them but when all of her friends are involved in an attack and the twins are left comatose will she have what it takes to step up, to show everyone what she is made of? Cierra Cardle needs to stay strong and not crumble through the trials. Can Cierra and her loved ones pull through? Join them in this romantic action filled adventure.**********Today is my 5th first day in high school so nothing new to me, same thing different school no doubt. Snotty popular girls, ass hat jocks, and everything in between.A weak human girl in a warewolf world, scrap that, a bad ass girl in a big scary world. Bring on the wolves!

Falling in love is the easiest part but trying to be ignorant about it and pushing it all away? What good would that do anyway? Meet Lucy Wilson, a 26 year old surgeon. Her work brings her back to New York, the place where she grew up with her childhood friend. A confident, young, beautiful woman who is well aware of the amount of attention she receives from the opposite sex but all these years she has been career focused and never allowed herself to get distracted by serious relationships. Meet Theodore Phillips, a 27 year old guy who is currently residing at New York. A full time Chef by profession and a pretty normal guy who lives a normal peaceful life. Just the way he likes it until he meets his childhood friend after almost 7 years. What happens when they try to reconnect ? Will they be able to let go of their silly fights from the past and move on as friends? Most importantly, will they be able to stay as friends as they claim to be or something more than that? Dive into their story filled with joy, fun, laughter and oh yeah, crazy drama of course.

Book Two of Cruel Intentions Series. This book can be read as a stand-alone, but for better comprehension of the characters, it is recommended to be read after Betrayed the Mafia. Theodore is the second in command of the Irish mob in New York. He is known as a player, use and toss. Theo hates relationships seeing them as useless. Theodore is funny and lighthearted around his friends, but when dealing with business, he is ruthless and heartless. His cold heart always prevails. Theodore is manipulative and a great liar. Theodore is chosen to help forge an alliance between the Irish and the Americans. He needs to marry the daughter of the boss. He takes his job and position seriously and accepts his fate. He doesn’t believe in love anyway, so that nothing will change for him. He will just have to wear a ring and play house. What happens when she is the girl he has avoided for years, the girl he feels the need to protect? He sees her as a weakness. He condones how she lives her life, but the day he allows himself to get close to her, everything changes, and his addiction to her becomes impossible to resist. Theodore is everything Everly has always dreamed of as an online romance novel writer, and she is inexperienced and sassy. The only way she has experienced love is through her books. She lives almost in captivity because of who she is, and Her purity will be negotiable. But once Theodore pops her cherry, he can’t stay away, involving her in a thread of lies and manipulations that she could only imagine as a plot of one of her books.

After witnessing Ares' accident, Vera had felt she has the responsibility to take care of him. There's a lot of options to do, but she chose to take off the heave on her chest which was to go and look for the reasons why that accident happened and become his bodyguard, nurse and driver. She thought those were the only things she need to handle, but her Captain still demanded her to act as a fake fiancée of her friend for some reasons. Working for Ares made her more attached to him which shouldn't be happening, but will she be able to stay with Ares just like a job and finish her mission-or is her story bound to be more complicated?

She's perfect. Kind, beautiful, and hardworking. Scholar din siya sa isang prehistisyosong unibersidad na kilala bilang paaralan ng mga mayayaman. Marami ang nagkakahumaling sa kaniya, pero dahil sa mahirap siya, ay nalalait siya. Because a girl like her shouldn't be studying in a school na hindi ka level ng kaniyang estado sa buhay. Ilang beses at halos araw-araw na siyang binubully, pero dahil sa pangarap na gusto niyang maabot, nagtiis siya. But never did she knows na hindi lang iyon ang pagdadaanan niya. Isang araw, dumating ang SSC council president at nakita ang SSC secretary na pasimuno sa pambubully kay Hailey. Pinaglaban nito si Hailey at sinibak sa pwesto ang mapangahas na bully. Hindi lang 'yun, pinag drop out din sa school due to violence. Lubos ang galit ng mga bully kay Hailey. Dahil kay Hailey napasibak sila at napahiya. Kaya naman, sinet up nila si Hailey at ibenenta sa isang grupo sa bar. She was raped. Hindi niya alam kung sino. Hanggang sa isang hindi inaasahan na pangyayari, nasangkot siya sa isang situwasyon kung saan muntikan na niyang ikamatay. And someone happened to save her. She owed her life to him. But this man wants her as the collateral. Gusto siya nitong maging role play girlfriend nito para lang mapatigil ang ina nito sa kaka appoint ng mga babae. Pero papaano kung malaman niya na ang lalaking ito ay ang rapist niya pala no'ng gabing binenta siya at ng mismong ama ng kaniyang dinadala? Magagawa pa ba niyang mapatawad ito?