I pause for a beat. He knows about it, of course, because he pays for it. It just seems like an out of the blue question. “About a year,” I answer.“And you take it every day? The way you’re supposed to?”“Yes.”He strokes harder, faster, his eyes glazed and distant as he looks at me. “That’s good. And when you had sex with Dante, where did he come? Inside of you?”“Yes.” For some reason, this line of questioning makes me nervous, like I might be in trouble. Lines seem blurred. But there’s an urgency to Xavier’s question; thinking about it is turning him on. “But in a condom,” I add.“That’s good,” he breathes, voice quivering. “That’s good, baby.” His brow furrows deeply, as if he’s in pain, and his breath starts coming in hard, rough pants. “Show me how good your tits feel. Squeeze them for me. Let me see you play with them.”Lifting my hands, I cup each one, rubbing and massaging them while my stepfather stares with rapt attention. I have a terrible thought, a thought I feel guilty
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