All Chapters of Better In Every Way: Chapter 11 - Chapter 20

Walking into this Monday morning, I feel refreshed. I feel like I’m slowly starting to adjust to everything. Having George popping in and out of my apartment this weekend helped to make everything feel a lot less lonely. Not to mention, we had finally managed to figure out how to place those large rollers on my head; so now I have the extra benefit of a perfect hair day to kick off the week.As usual, Liliana was ready to greet me at my door with my schedule for today. This week, however, she did not hold back.Today was supposed to be my first official day back; so there was a lot that I needed to attend to.After giving me the rundown for the week, Liliana left my office. Only to, like last week, return with a bouquet. “Another one came for you this morning. Still no card; and this time it’s just the flowers, so no package.” She said.“Oh, okay. Just put them on the coffee table.” I point to the flowers from last week that had begun to wilt. “You can throw those out.” I say.“You

I made my way back to the office alone, feeling more optimistic than I have in over a month. I tried to ignore it, but the last few weeks had me in a sort of state of emotional limbo. The experience of having a part of my life plan ripped away and significant aspects of my world view altered had truly emotionally and mentally exhausted me. The only time I wasn’t at an emotional flat line, I was riding the very deep dips. But not right now. Right now I find myself on an upward trend. I allow myself to revel in the hope that my life didn’t go to complete shit a month ago. Maybe everything didn’t go as planned; I may not get the full package where I’d return to the ranch style home, family, and doting husband after a long days work in a fulfilling career. But I can still have the fulfilling career.And goddammit, does it feel fulfilling right now.I make a beeline for Rachel’s office. As I walk past her assistant, Micheal, he gives me a nod to indicate that she is available. I do not wa

I am woken up close to noon on Saturday morning by the sound of someone knocking at my door. I try my best to ignore it, choosing to cower under my sheets where its warm rather than going out there and facing the world that is becoming increasingly colder and colder. It may be mid-autumn; but the weather, especially in the mornings, was a biting prelude to winter.Besides, I am exhausted. This last, very busy, week had taken a lot out of me. Outside of the physical toll, everything that had happened had also emotionally exhausted me. Old feelings and very confusing new ones had my head in a spin by the time Friday rolled around. So much so that I couldn’t even make it to Melody Line.I wasn’t in the right headspace to be interacting with everyone, especially Rachel.I still very much needed that space that I asked her for, and I didn’t think it would be fair to subject Emma and Rory to the awkwardness that undoubtedly still exists between us.I just wasn’t in the mood for celebratio

It seems I may have underestimated what is going on between Rachel and Dominic as just a crush on her part. It appears as though the feeling is reciprocated.I have been staring at them for the last ten minutes as they were engrossed in their own conversation that Alec and I were not a part of. Seemingly too concerned with each other to remember that we were even there.“I thought this was supposed to be a meeting.” I say to Alec next to me.“It is.” He says, much too absorbed in the endless options on the dessert menu— even though we hadn’t even gotten our entrées yet— to even notice the two lovebirds at our table.“Then why do I feel like we are third wheeling their date?” I ask just as Rachel giggled at something Dominic said. Full on dainty schoolgirl giggle. A sound I haven’t heard her make since she was actually a schoolgirl.Alec finally looks up from his food quest to look at them and then me. “We don’t have to be third wheels, this could be like a double date.” He smiles.“Yo

I did get a text from my mother soon after I left the church, but I didn’t open it. What good would that do anyway? I already know what it says. She probably just sent a long winded text about how I embarrassed her and our family. And she, more than likely, is ranting about how my non-wedding put our family in this position in the first place and a whole other manner of unhelpful things that I just don’t want to see. Opening up her text would just make an already emotionally exhausting day even shittier. And this week was going so well. At the risk of jinxing it, I will admit that I had been feeling different lately. I wasn’t just distracting myself. Emma had been basically forcing me to “deal with my shit”, as she’d put it, for the last month. I can’t say that it was comfortable, it was hard as hell, but I need it. It feels like tearing down a building block sculpture you spent so much time on because some of the pieces came out or don’t fit right anymore. So now it’s time to