Lahat ng Kabanata ng Rejected by the Beta: Kabanata 31 - Kabanata 40

“You know, I wish you weren’t my mate,” I say, once we’re out of earshot of the others. I’d like to say it in front of everyone. I want everyone to know my true feelings about him. I want everyone to know what a coward James is. But I still won’t stoop that low.For James, it’s not just his pride on the line. It’s also his place in the pack that’s at risk. And though I resent him for not choosing me, I still begrudgingly respect what he chose. I won’t take that from him. “I wish I never met you,” I continue.The words sound wrong. They feel clunky and awful on my lips. They feel like flimsy lies I’m saying to try to make myself feel better, but it’s true. James has caused me nothing but hurt and trouble.I can see the hurt on his face as I fling these words at him. But he deserves it. He deserves to feel the intense pain he has put me through.“You let me down every single time you get the chance to,” I say. “And I’m so done with dealing with you. Don’t you ever try to tell me

I’m led through familiar hallways, back into the Alpha’s office. I suspect he’s going to interrogate me further and that the claim there was a guest here to see me was a lie to get me to come here without fighting. Once I enter the office though, I see my brother at Ryan’s desk. He stands and he doesn’t seem concerned or upset at all. Has our relationship fallen apart so much that he doesn’t even care that I’m a prisoner?As he looks at me, I realize something though. He is upset. But he’s mostly upset with me, and the concern is hidden in an attempt to make this seem much simpler than it is. I’m in for a lecture when I get home.“Getting yourself in trouble again, I see,” Ben says, with the smile I’ve known since we were children. He shakes his head. “I knew you were up to something, Isabel. You can’t fool me, you know. We know each other too well for that.”“I know you’ve been up to something too,” I counter. Maybe now’s not the time, but I won’t let him get away with putting

“I can’t stay here,” I say. “I need to get out of this house.”Ben’s face pales. “I’m sorry,” I continue. “I love you, but I need a break from all of this. It’s too much. I can’t stay here. I need to get away for a little bit.”I run upstairs because I can’t keep looking at this brother I don’t recognize. It hurts being so close to someone only to have things change like that. He’s here, but I’ve lost him. I’ve lost James. I lost my parents and now I realize I didn’t know them fully either.So, where do I go from here? I keep losing people. It seems like I don’t have a place to fit.Then, I realize there’s still someone left, of course. My best friend is the only person who I’m not having so much drama with. And I know she’ll be willing to listen to everything and give me advice.I don’t even know that I need advice right now though. I’m not sure advice could really help me. There’s not much I can do about everything, but the listening part would be nice. And I really do need

Ryan’s warning sticks in my mind for the rest of my shift.Stay away from James.There is something about that threat though that sticks to me even deeper than most would. Because there was feeling behind those woods. He truly means it.He knows there’s something between James and I. He knows and he hates it. And it’d be so stupid and dangerous to meet with James tonight, even though I already agreed to.Ryan has shown his loyalties of course lie with James. If we’re caught, I’m the one who’s going to pay the highest price. Yet, I still take extra time getting ready that night. I pick out a simple, light blue dress that I hope will catch the moonlight. I do my hair. I apply light makeup.“You’re really going to meet with him after everything?” Sharon asks, as she looks me over.“I have to,” I say. “Despite everything, he is my mate. I have to go to him. I’m drawn to him. It feels like fate. And I did already agree to meet with him.”She shakes her head in disapproval but she d

The cold of the night settles in once the pack leaves. It reaches through my skin, into my soul. And I stay there much longer than I need to so I can feel safe. I probably stay there much longer than I should.The pact was extra terrifying this time though, so I can’t get it out of my mind. I worry that if I leave, I’ll run into them and who knows what they’ll do to me this time. Who knows what they’ll do to Ben.I stand, deciding that if I’m captured, at least maybe I’ll be brought to Ben and we can deal with this together. This will all be better if we can do this together.Of course, I know that if I’m going to save him, I’ll have a better chance at doing so if I’m not in chains. So, I want to avoid capture if I can.I will save him regardless. If I have to, anyway.As I walk back to my house I think about if I really will have to save him. The pack caught me and they didn’t harm me. They just put me in a cell and then let me go.That has to be the case with Ben as well. Sur