NIKOLAI.It’s not the wedding I planned but it’s not far from it either. It’s. . . . just perfect.Most people have glamorous dreams and fantasies about their wedding days, I did too, till I didn’t anymore. It might sound like an exaggeration to some people but my mother was the light of my life. When she died, it all went dark. Really dark.I started to feel less and less hurt till I couldn’t feel anything anymore. All my emotions were lost in the abyss of my hollow heart and along the line, I became a monster. My father saw a dark soul and instead of giving light to it, he made it into a monster. I no longer have nightmares about the day she died but I didn’t forget about it either. It’s still fresh in my memory. The way the air smelled that day. The wetness of the night and the way water dripped down my hair relentlessly. The heat that came with. The itch. The worry.The sound it made when it hit the ground, the screams and the grunts. It’s like I can still hear them, I can st
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