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Regret.
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2024-10-29 19:42:56“Where were you last night?” I questioned Ryan.
He blinked and hesitated for a moment before getting up from the ground.
He grabbed my shoulder and leaned down a bit to my height to look me in the eyes. Part of me didn’t want to know the answer. I was afraid that he would admit that he lied to me. I just wanted him to give me some excuse or something to prove Vian wrong.
Meanwhile, Jackson got up from the ground and tried to leave the place.
“Ava, I am so sorry that I lied but it’s not what you think. I would never do something like that to hurt you. I will explain everything later.” He ran to follow Jackson after saying that leaving me alone.
Yet again I was left in the dark with so many questions. I don’t know what everyone is talking about or hiding from me. I don’t understand how I am involved in all of this but somehow they succeeded in making me feel guilty for so
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You are my FLAME Not heartbroken.
My entire world collapsed, and I was standing there listening to him in terror when Ryan told me everything. I couldn’t imagine how a person could be this vile. I know Jackson, but I never thought even he would do something like this. Ryan also told me how if it wasn’t for Vian that would have succeeded. He also apologized for lying to me about the call with his mom and confessed that he was Nina that night because she asked for his help. “I just didn’t want you to misunderstand. That’s why I lied. I am sorry Ava.” He said with regret. “Why?” I asked Jackson looking at him in disbelief. I still couldn’t believe what I heard, and I wanted to know why Jackson did what he did, after all, I am his best friend’s girlfriend. He snorted and chuckled like it was some kind of a joke. “Why? I just wanted you out of our lives.” He spat with venom in his words. “I lost my best friend because of you and I lost my girlfriend because of my best friend.” Jack
You are my FLAME Is it wrong?
It was a miserable week for me. Vian and Jay avoided me like a plague and gave me a cold shoulder no matter what I do to convince them. Ryan looked dejected whenever I saw him. He looked like being alone didn’t bother him but the light in his eyes was gone. I caught him looking at Jackson having fun with the rest of his friends and then he walked away when he noticed me. He didn’t even try to talk to me. Everyone behaved like we lost something except for Jackson who was the reason for everything that happened in the first place. I wanted to do something about it. I couldn’t watch him having fun while he crushed the spirit in all of us. I waited for the right moment to do something. I didn’t want to take the risk when there is a high chance that he didn’t delete Hazel’s video but I wasn’t going to leave him alone and sit like everything was okay. At the end of the week, I was mentally drained.
You are my FLAME Is that hate?
I know that friends get angry, and they fight, they reconcile and then they fight again and then they reconcile again. This is the vicious cycle I know… the cycle I believe. I believe that if you love someone once then you could never hate them no matter what they did to you. If you hate them, then what’s the point in loving them in the first place? Unless they betray you in some way… even then I don’t know if I could hate them fully. But have you ever thought that your best friend hates you? Like when you approach them to apologize, but all you see in their eyes is that they are not so loving anymore or some foreign emotion that your friend never showed you before. At that moment, has a thought crossed your mind that they hate you? Even if you reconcile and get back together, when you think back at that moment from years now I am sure that you will think that, ‘I thought I almost lost him/her.’ I went home to change deciding that I will
You are my FLAME New chapter.
I was sure that I didn’t deserve this. No matter what it is I would never treat them like they treated me now and that made me angry. At that moment, I knew they hated me and the only way I can limit the damage is if I walked away from them, first. “You know what… never mind.” I stood up wiping my tears vigorously. ‘Stupid tears just don’t know when to stop.’ “I thought we are still friends. Now I understand that we are no more. I wouldn’t disturb you guys anymore.” saying that I exhaled deeply trying to control my emotions. “Aves…” Jay called me before I step out of the door. “Stop… Just stop.” I said holding my hand out towards him. “You were walking away like I wasn’t there kneeling in front of you.” I couldn’t hold it in anymore. “I loved you both so much. One mistake… that is all it took for you to throw me away. I mean it wasn’t even a mista
You are my FLAME Forever?
In the upcoming weeks, a lot has happened. We were almost at the end of our high school days. I didn’t feel bad about leaving it all behind. Maybe I will miss my grandma and all of our favorite places where we used to hang out. My favorite tree at school, the ice cream parlor, the park, my roof, and the lake, where I went on my first date. I would miss all those places but I was more excited about our future together in London. Jackson’s issue was covered up by his parents like it was nothing. They made some kind of deal with the police and the girl’s parents to draw a veil over it. The parents agreed to it because they didn’t want the entire town to know about the scandal their girls were involved in. That’s the perk of having rich parents. You can do anything and get away with it. But thankfully Mr. Donan refused to graduate Jackson from our school strictly. So he was sent out of the country to continue his studies by his parents. No o
You are my FLAME Bucket list.
“Jay, open the door.” I banged on the front door for the third time, but there was no response. Vian and I showed up at Jay’s house as soon as it was dawn. I had a plan in my mind to take Jay’s mind off of things. Vian didn’t know anything about my plan, and I was planning to keep it that way until its time. “If you don’t open the door in three, I am breaking in. You know I will do.” I sent a warning. I was about to kick the door in frustration due to lack of movements on the other side but the door opened suddenly making me stumble. Thankfully I balanced myself by grabbing Vian who was standing beside me. “What?” I heard Jay’s curt reply standing with an annoying look at the door. “Get ready. We are going somewhere.” I didn’t give him time to say anything and went inside pushing past him. “Not in the mood.” I heard him from the back. ‘Well, too bad. I didn’t come here
You are my FLAME Hints.
It’s been months since I came to London. We successfully graduated passing the final exams with flying colors. I miss old town badly, but I promised my grandma to visit often before I left. London life was very much different from the life I had in my grandma’s town. Even though I have been visiting my mom every summer, staying here, permanently felt different. The city was always busy, and it was hard to keep up. I felt like I was always running. I helped my mom with café work in the morning, and I worked at a pizza shop as a delivery person in the evening. I applied at the University of London for an English literature course and was waiting for a call from the office. It was my mom’s idea to apply to that college. She thought if I go to college in London then she can spend more time with me unlike before. She had this beautiful picture of my future in her mind where I become a professor or a writer, fall in love, and start a family in London. It all sounde
You are my FLAME Jealous.
It was that day I was the most excited in my life. I woke up early that morning to choose what dress I was going to wear and how I was going to style my hair. It took hours for me to choose a perfect dress. I was in a good mood for the whole day. My mom looked at me weirdly when I was whistling while helping her in the kitchen. My brain was firing serotonin all day keeping me high. I was looking at the clock every five minutes expecting it to strike at 4 pm. I told my mom that I was going out with Vian and started getting ready an hour before. I wanted to look beautiful, but I didn’t want to come out like I was trying too much. I decided to go with a simple purple crop top pairing it with high-waisted jeans and white sneakers. I let my hair down styling it with light end curls. I kept my makeup minimum but concentrating more on my eyes. I used eyeliner and mascara to make my eyes lookout. Vian used to say that my e
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You are my FLAME Epilogue.
I blinked a few times to adjust my vision and then I screamed noticing the person who helped me.“Jay!” I hugged him tightly in excitement without believing my eyes. I was relieved that at least Jay was there beside me even though my dad and brother couldn’t make it.“Do you think we would let you get married without dad walking you to the aisle?” I looked around hearing Damon behind me. Willie, Damon, and Dev walked towards me in their black suits and I couldn’t help but get overwhelmed watching them. Since the moment they have taken off the blindfold, it all felt like a dream.“I thought you guys aren’t gonna be there.” I wept like a crazy girl hugging my dad and my brother in elation. Weirdly, even when I was happy beyond words tears kept rolling down my cheeks.“Baby girl, you haven’t said anything about my masterpiece,” Dev said running his hands over my dress. I was surprised an
You are my FLAME You are my Flame.
I was taking an evening walk with Vian towards our high school in the old town. The sun shone brightly on the western sky just before setting like it was ready to give the stage to the moon and the stars. We were walking in silence immersed in our thoughts.A day before, Vian suddenly barged into my office with Damon and took me with him hauling me away from my office without saying anything about where he was taking me and leaving Damon in charge of the company like he owned it.I was busy for the past two weeks, and I couldn’t even properly text Vian on those days. I was trying to finish a deal with a Chinese company that was interested in investing in our company. If I get that deal successfully then, I needn’t worry about paying Ryan’s dad’s debt in a year. With Vian and Jay’s help, I could pay him off within 6 months.I tried my best to refuse Vian and Jay’s help but they somehow convinced me. Jay told me that he was payi
You are my FLAME Sorry.
“Seriously? You are still wearing that?” Vian questioned with a very upset look in his eyes. “I… I forgot about it.” I said feeling guilty and defenseless. “You forgot about it?” he asked me in a mocking tone. “It’s YOUR finger and YOU are wearing it.” He pressed the words pointing at my hand. “How could you forget something like that and it’s been two days,” Vian said with a menacing look. He was right, and I have nothing to say to that but I wasn’t going to stand there looking all guilty and go down without an argument. “Well, you were with me on those two days, why didn’t you say anything about it? You must have seen it at least once. You should have told me something before proposing to me.” I yelled back. It was the most absurd thing that came out of my mouth. “Oh, I am sorry I didn’t notice the ring in your finger because my concentration was elsewhere in your body,” he growled back without thinking. It took him a second to realize what
You are my FLAME Already Engaged!
Two days. Vian and I ignored this world for two days without giving a fuck about anything and lived off only eating takeouts with little sleep and lots of sex. We didn’t pick up any of the calls we received on our phones. In fact, we forgot where we kept them. Sometimes in the middle of the night or in the early morning and sometimes, at late noon we hear them ringing but completely ignored it just for the fun of it.I used to worry about others than myself usually. If it was some other time I would have thought about how Willie and Damon would be worried without hearing from me for two days and on top of that I didn’t even tell them where I was going. To be honest I didn’t know where I was going when I walked out of my house.But the whole world faded away when I was with Vian those two days. I was madly, irrevocably in love
You are my FLAME Burned like a furnace.
I am not sure if I did justice to Vian and Ava's love in this chapter but I do hope you guys enjoy reading it............................................................................“You did. But… You… My name’s written there… striking Ryan’s name… is this what I think it is?” he asked me.“Yes,” I said firmly. I was nervous about what he would say after everything happened.“But… But why? Last night you said… you said…” he tried to say something, but he couldn’t as he was hit with lots of emotions remembering last night’s events.“I am sorry,” I said as my voice croaked remembering the night… remembering how I hurt him with my words.“Why? What happened? What’s changed?” he bombarded me with questions as he was surprised by my change of heart suddenly.“I know wh
You are my FLAME Confessing again.
“Elena!” I was hit with surprise and confusion at the same time.“Your dad let me in.” She said with an awkward smile as she walked in and took a seat beside me on the bed.“I am really surprised to see you here,” I said hoping that she would understand the real meaning of my question. I wanted to know why she came to meet me.But she remained silent thinking about something, fidgeting her fingers. “Do you want anything to drink or something?” I asked her but she politely refused.“I heard you got engaged. Congratulations!” she said with a small smile. It didn’t feel like she was actually wishing me, though.“Thank you.” I said smi
You are my FLAME Let's start again.
Darkness.That was the only thing I could think of when I came to my senses. I have been awake since an hour ago or so, but I stayed in my bed without opening my eyes.Darkness. Sometimes it’s not just something that you only see when you close your eyes or in other words that you can’t see anything in the absence of light but you could also feel it when there is no light in your life.I kept my eyes closed to see the darkness clearly so that I didn’t have to feel it. It awaits just behind the veil of my closed eyelids to engulf me as a whole.I will have to open my eyes anytime soon and let it swallow me but I prolonged the inevitable just by staying in bed with my eyes closed, feeling content as my mind made up an illusion of peace.
You are my FLAME Vian.
Vian’s journal. Dear diary, I am gonna tell you a story about a stupid boy who sacrificed his love twice for his friends. To him, they both mean the world, and he would do anything for them even if it meant hurting himself. I was just a cheeky, naïve little boy when Jay and Ava came into my life. They both loved me regardless of who I was and cared for me like I am their family. In life, nothing can be quite precious in this world as your ideas and experiences to share with someone. Nothing can be more magnanimous than being an inspiration to someone. On that note, I know I must always be grateful to Jay who inspired me with his dreams and ambitions when I was just wandering around in life, and Ava who made me run towards my dreams. To someone who doesn’t know who his mother was and has a father who travels a lot rather spending time with his son, Jay and Ava were the dad and mom to me. Over the years, Jay bec
You are my FLAME Jay.
Jay’s Journal. Dear diary, It’s so hard for me to see Vian and Ava like this. I cannot watch them being in pain, hurting each other. Everything was my fault. If only I hadn’t fallen in love… with her, with my Ava, I could have prevented years of pain for the three of us. Yes, I am in love with Ava, and I have been for quite a while. I don’t exactly remember when I started to grow feelings for her, but I remember the times when I enjoyed her company so much. I crack jokes just to watch her laugh and I tease and annoy her to see her cute pouts. I thought it was just friendship for a while but then I realized I didn’t want to lose her to someone when I lost my mom. She always took care of me and loved me more than my family. I’ve always enjoyed the way she treated me special than others… than Vian. I guess I was just too late to realize that. When we moved to London, I started noticing certain changes with Ava and also V
