*
I couldn't sleep throughout the night. My mind was reeled up with the thought of Ryder and where he might be. His phone was still turned off, making it impossible to reach him.
I have no reason to believe Simon was lying about him not being home and probably not coming back too. Maybe the man was just doing as he was told because he is upset with me and doesn't want to speak or see me which is absolutely okay.
I mean, who would want to see a jerk face like me after everything I put him through emotionally. He has every right not to want to see me. I deserve it but am not going to give up that easily.
Ryder can avoid me all he want but let see how he does it in school today because I won't stop until we have that much needed talk.
I hurriedly brushed my teeth and got ready for school. I grab a cup of coffee and some bagel before hurrying out the door. Today is Monday and we have first period together so whether he wants to
*I got into my car and drove in the speed of light towards the only place i have dreaded my whole life since my parent died.Images from that night still hunted me in my sleep when I go to bed at night. That distinctive smell of disinfectant and ambulance siren blowing from a nearby distance has being stucked in my mind since that day I found myself sitting in the EU, waiting for the doctor to tell me something, just anything that proves that my mom had pulled back to life but the more I waited, the longer it took and the more obvious it became to me, it had all ended in tears just like it did with my dad's.Tears could not bring them back no matter how hard I begged and cried my eyes out. They were really gone forever and I had to face the reality of their absence right from that very moment till this very day and I can tell you how fucked up that has been.You cry yourself to sleep and wake up to yet another day and begin again. It's a void that
*We walked into the hospital cafeteria and ordered two cups of black coffee with some extra cream in mine. I offered to pay for mine but Simon wouldn't let me so I thanked him and grab hold of it before we went over and got settled in one of the empty table close to the door.I look around for the moment, not very happy with the sight around me. No one seem to have a cheerful face in sight. Why was I expecting?, this is a freaking hospital for god sake and most people here, probably have a love one in there whose live was probably hanging in the balance and they are back here trying to keep their own mind from flipping over with uncertainty.I inhaled the delicious aroma of my coffee as it hit my nose and penetrate my senses, jolting me out of my thoughts as well. Sighing deeply, I took a sip of it and almost got burnt by it.Simon gave me a stare and I bite my lower lip feeling like a fool all of a sudden. "Allow it to steam down a little.
Ryder's POV*My chest felt a lot heavier than usual as I made my way out of Jaden's house and into the open and further down their pavement and towards my motor bike. I began to take deep breath in a bit to figure out what could be wrong. I knew the sadness of finally deciding to give up on Jaden was going to get to me but I didn't think it was going to restrict my air flow this bad and all of a sudden too.I climbed on to my bike but got hit by a gigantic wave that almost knocked me off to the floor. I thought about calling Jaden for help but remembered he was wasted and sleeping it off right where I left him a while ago.Dragging myself back to his house doesn't seem like a good idea either so I pulled out my phone and called the only person I knew would come for me even if I was in the middle of a freaking tsunami.I managed to climb back down as i dropped to the floor, my back laying flat against the ground, both my hands clutch tightly
Jaden's POV*It was 7:30am when I glance at my watch yet again for the seventh time in a roll. The doctor was only in there for like thirty minutes before he left and Simon and his mom went in to check on him while I stayed back by the hallway, not sure if Ryder wanted to see me.I was afraid my presence by his bedside earlier was what triggered his reaction the first time and can't have him react the same way again. Waiting outside for now seem like the best move until am sure it's totally safe to go in again.I kept fidgeting the whole time. Just pacing around and thinking about all the damn reasons why he wouldn't want to see me.When the door crack open and I saw Mrs. Steward face, I almost ran for it. I asked her if he wanted to see me but she said no, she seem rather in a hurry so she didn't pay much attention to anything I had to say. She simply told me, she was heading home to prepare his meal before she quickly rushed down the
Jaden's POVIs it just me or everyone else only think about sleeping and hiding away when they are sad and depressed, because ever since I got home from the hospital, I have been locked up here in my room just sleeping my sorrow away while shutting the world out like it doesn't exist.What is there to think about even . I just feel this great big void in my life that keeps drilling a really painful hole in my chest over and over again. It's even worst because nothing else seem to make sense any more so I can't even focus on the pain either. I'm just here wishing my thought away. It's like pretty much all the colors in my sky is either grey or plain black. I just feel completely and totally lost. Completely lost in this darkness of my own thought.Ryder hates me and that's fact. He really does and that hurt more than you can even imagine.Groaning out in frustration, i snuggle closer to my pillow and buried my face deep into it, getting all the
*Everything seem to be moving in slower motion as I began to walk towards my team mates with the sole intention of telling them the truth. I rather have all of them hate and judge me for my sexuality and be free than allow myself put up with Tia's manipulation for another day.I know am not perfect. I never said I was perfect because no one is fucking perfect. People just like to hide their flaws and put up a fake appearances to get people approval but that's besides the point am making right now.We all make mistakes and learn from it and I wouldn't call mine a mistake. I fell in love and it doesn't matter who this heart of mine has chosen to love and it's not something to be ashamed of. I admit i was scared of what everyone would think of me but not anymore.The world can judge me if they want but am done judging myself. I'm done listening to the voices that says, I don't fit into their idea of what love is suppose to be or how love is suppose to
*"How long Jaden? Just tell me how long you have been screwing him behind my back" Jasmine more than yelled at me yet again and I had to put a safe distance between us before she tries to hit me again. She looks like she is going to hit me again and I can't promise not to tie her to a chair if she does."Calm the fuck down alright?, it's true Ryder and I have kissed around a few times but we haven't been fucking If that's what you are referring to. I mean, it's true I love him but_""_You love him?" Her voice cut me off mid sentence. "Are you even listening to yourself right now? How can you say, you love him when you know I was the one that liked him first. I mean, everything was going so well between us until you probably seduced him or something and then got him to dump me like i was nothing and now, you stand here to claim to love him and have kissed around a few fucking times?, how long have you been laughing behind my back at my cluelessness" Her li
Ryder's POV*It's really painful how Jaden never ever consider making the right decision when it comes to me or himself because if he is, then his decision won't always be about others. Putting their happiness first, maintaining his perfect image for them, just so they can love and accept him.He'd throw everything good in his life away for their comfort even if it causes him so much pain and discomfort. That's exactly how much he is willing to get hurt for the people who doesn't give a fuck about him, so they can see the perfect boy that's Jaden Cole. The star boy who is the basketball captain. The one who can get any girl with his charming smile. Heck, he even got Tia to show off he is really good at it.Why am I saying all these?,I'm hurt alright. I have been hurt deeply and i'm not talking about the pain in my flesh. I'm talking about the one in my heart. The one caused by a certain boy named Jaden Cole. He is the reason that is making me vent
Five years later.Jaden's POVI took another glance at my watch for the umpteenth time in a row and then back at the weather outside and sigh. It was still drizzling after a heavy downpour and I can't help but wonder if Ryder is still going to make it here as planned.I grab a glass of water from across the table and downed it, still trying to calm my nerve a bit. Five years has slip by so fast and a lot have changed around here. I graduated from college two months ago and even made it to my favorite basketball team as assistant captain.Jasmine was in her third year of college and barely come around. Just like I said before, a lot have changed around here but something have pretty much stayed the same like my relationship with Ryder. Yes we have had our ups and downs but we are still sticking it out.When his father found out about us, he felt Ryder was going through a rebellious phase and would eventually grow over it, forcing us to put our relationship on hold for a couple of month
*Thirty minutes later, we arrived back in school and at the venue where the party is being held. Finally arriving in school came with a different kind of headache. I mean, aside from posing for a compulsory photo session at the entrance with awkward position with a bunch of people I might not be seeing again for the rest of my life, I also had to deal with my sister clingy ass who is still holding onto my boyfriend's arm as if he is the only lifejacket in a middle of a sinking ship.This particular scene kind of remind me of the first time I saw them together and even though I was convinced Ryder was the one swooning all over her, now I know my sister is the nosy house fly that won't go away and leave us alone.I mean, where the fuck is her prom date for crying out loud. If Oliver doesn't find and take her soon, I will be forced to do something my side. Ryder on the other hand seem to be enjoying this way too much as he was gladly going with whatever the fuck she want without a sing
Jaden's POV*"Wait, is it just me or Alec seem a little pissed back there" I finally let out a breath once we got home and went up the stairs and into the safe comfort of my room.Ryder gave a careless shrug as he took off his shoes before jumping on my bed with a loud sigh. "I don't know, I think he was just his usual nosy self"Maybe am just being jealous but still, I wasn't very comfortable around the guy and that's just pretty much it.Taking off my shoes and shirt as well, I slipped into bed beside him and he immediately reached over and pulled me closer before kissing the top of my head with a sigh.We just lay in that position for a bit, no word uttered, just listening to each other heart beat before I heard him yawn loudly."Can I crash here tonight?" He asked while peering down at me with heavy eye lids.Wrapping my arms around his midrib, I held him closer before nuzzling my face into the fabric of his clothes. "Is that a yes?" He asked between laughs."Stay forever" I tol
Jaden's POV*"So, where are we going?" I said to Ryder as he handed me his helmet with a smirk."You will find out when we get there. Now, C'mon" He gave me a wink then his leg swung over and he positioned himself on his bike with a flick of his hair that was starting to look longer than usual.He did so in a perfectly and effortlessly way. Just like a fucking rock star would. I mean, he was already looking the part. Black jacket with equally dark ripped jean and boots.He was fucking perfect.I snapped out of my drooling and placed the helmet over my head and then pushed myself up and over the bike and immediately link my hands around his waist. And not once did I forget to sniff in his scent into my lungs. He smell so fucking divine and edible."You ready?" He called back at me and my grip tighten in response."Let go"The motorcycle engine roar to life instantly and next thing I know, we had sped past the school gates and also out of sight and towards an unknown destination."What
Ryder's POV*The rest of the day drone out slowly with preparation for our final exams. I barely even saw Jaden, making my day even more boring than it started out.I sent him a text earlier and he only replied with a heart emoji and a talk to you later.I can't believe how much am missing him even though am pretty much seated with the guys and they haven't stopped chattering on top of their voices."Why are you sulking?" Nathan asked me out of nowhere with furrowed brows."I'm not sulking Nat" I snapped at him."Yes you are" he said poking his middle index at me. "You look so sad without Jaden and it's starting to hurt my eyes pretty bad" he said and began laughing.Noah smack him over the shoulder with a weak glare. "Quit making fun of him. It's already hard enough that Jaden is not here to cheer him up. I mean, you wouldn't know since you haven't been in love and all" he gave me a sympathetic look and I just scoffed at him.Oliver and Cooper just chuckle under their breath, obviou
Ryder's POV*After walking around hand in hand, Jaden and I spotted an ice cream truck by the road side and went for it. We ordered for two vanilla with extra cherry at the top.Before I could take out my wallet and and pay for it, Jaden already beat me to it as he quickly handed the lady a few bucks."Hey, I really wanted to pay for that. You have been spending for us all night?"I said with a little sad pout.He gave a shrug, "I don't mind spending for us and besides, you did all the spending when we went out on a movie date last time so it's my turn""Alright" I told him with a smile and he reached out and pulled me closer to his side, his arms wrapped protectively across my shoulder while the other one held on to his ice cream comb.I took a lick at mine and felt the flavor melt in my mouth. "Umm, This taste so good" I have moaned and commented.Jaden gave with a questioning look before he answered with a nod and took a lick at his."You are right, this actually taste pretty good"
Jaden's POV*Ryder and I ended up back in my house and inside my room to be exact. My whole muscle aches like never before and instead of spending 50 buck at spa tomorrow, he offered to massage me first. At first I thought he was kidding around or just wanted to see me butt naked and spread out like yummy candy before his eyes but boy, was I wrong? Not only does Ryder have pretty magic fingers. He also knows exactly how to unknot my fucking tensed muscles just fine."Are you better now?" He question from right on top of me and I groan into the pillow before replying."Not yet. I'm going to need you to go a little lower and faster than that and work it some more"And just like I wanted, he added more of that coco scenting oil i got from Jasmine room into his palm and slap it to my flesh before his hands began to work their way down to the arch in my back and causing my eyes to roll all the way back when he made it to the exact spot I wanted."Yup. Right there babe. That's the fucking
*note: this chapter will be written in two point of views. First from Jaden's then Ryder's so take note.Jaden's POV.*The crowd erupt into a loud cheer as we sprint into the court, my eyes immediately scanning the bleachers for Ryder. My eyes caught sight of him among the last row and it's crazy how he is looking at me too. I held his gaze for another moment before refocusing on the task at hand.The clock was about to start ticking and the crowd was relentless in cheering us to victory. We went over the rules of the game with the referee before we took our positions. Before the ball get toss in the air, I clear my mind of every single noise and whisper as I focus more on the ball.For the next twelve minutes, give or take, the only thing that matters is getting this ball through that hoop as many times as possible.I look over to my right and Oliver seem to be mirroring my thought exactly. I allowed the cheers of the spectators wash over me and through me,fueling the adrenaline pum
Jaden's POV*Tonight is the day we all been training our butt off for. Winning tonight game can leave us with a future to look forward to, especially for people like me hoping to get a scholarship to college and loosing would mean looking for another means to survive through college but just like coach Mike said earlier. Loosing tonight game doesn't mean we are failures, it simply means we should put in more work and come back better but I doubt there would be another chance like this one for me.This is my last year of high school and also my only chance to make something out of it. My parent already did their best saving up enough money to carry us through highschool and even though Jasmine doesn't know it yet, we only have enough to send one of us to college and that's why I need this scholarship, that way Jasmine will have enough funds to go through college without stress.I only found out recently and telling her about it won't change anything