Midnight Rain

*I do hope you are okay and you get home safe with your brother. Message me if you are ready to have that late night stroll and be ready for the song jam. Hehe. - VJ*

I smiled. I will admit that he got a bonus point on that. He really made up my night. Funny how a complete stranger changes my perspective in life in just hours.

(Fast forward: Its been six months since VJ and I chatted. We've been into lot of coffee dates and a lot of caramel beer moments. I also introduced him to my parents and they liked him. For Sy, I haven't talked to him yet. He bombarded me with missed call and messages but I keep on ignoring it. Its been two months since VJ and I are in a relationship. I'm happy and safe. But one thing comes up to my mind)

"Baby, its been six months and you still haven't tell me your whole name"

"Why does it matter?"

"Maybe because I do have trust issue?"

Yeah. You read it right. We are officially together and yet he can't show me his phone. Tell me his name. Or tell me where he lives. We didn't even had photos together. Everytime that someone will call me by unknown number and we're together he seems confused and out of his mind. I know he's hiding something and yet I can't confront him.

"I am just scared that my past will haunt you baby. That's it."

So it means that his ex thing, the one that he told me on the bar the first night is true?

"How will that affect me huh? I just don't understand"

"This is the first time that I have been happy on my entire life. I just don't want it to be ruined again"

It doesn't make any sense. I wanted to have a private investigation on him but I know that will make the drama more chaotic.

Then we both got busy. We both hardly don't have time for each other. There are days when we just meet and eat then he'll take me home. Its been unclear.

"Why don't you just call him? I mean visit him on one of his events?" Fijii suggested.

"He has private life. Very private one"

I don't want my brother to get into our relationship. To find out everything. I don't want to lose him.

Then one day, rainy afternoon day.

"You know what it just doesn't make sense. All I am asking is for us to have fun together just for one day"

"Dan, why can't you understand that I am super busy right now. This is my job. My bread and butter. I do have a lot of appointments for today and I know you know it right? So what's with this argument?"

I got irritated on what he said to me there.

"Stop the car I'm going home"

"Are you fricking dumb? Where in the middle of the highway and you want me to stop?"

"Are you also deaf? I can manage on my own. I even know how to get home drunk and it is just rain. So stop the car"

"I am here and making up with all the promises and late appointments that I wanted to have with you and you want me to stop?"

I didn't reply to him. Instead, just look out of the window and see the gloomy clouds. All of a sudden I just felt tears coming down on my eyes. I wanted to ask him a lot of things to be honest. I don't want people hidding something from me. What am I to him a plain friend? Isn't it my right to know everything?

Two years have passed and we lost communication. There so many things that happened that fate just wants me to get rest. Worldwide pandemic started. Fijii got into a prestigious school in Japan. Dad had a business venture with Mom at Italy. And I am currently at Venice making my own signature wine.

"Im at Venice Gauxshie can we meet now?"

I ran as fast as I can where Domaine sent his locaation. I hugged him and I feel like I am smiling right now.

“Tell me Margaux, How will I know if I can trust you again? Do I even have to invite your man here and make him spill the tea?”

I am very furious. I can’t even describe how many times do I want to punch him in the face. How eager my hands are when it comes to hearing your name.

“I have told you a lot of times that I don’t want you mentioning his name”

Seems like the silence break every single spot in the room.

How am I going to tell everyone about that. I am not yet ready to let everyone know that I haven’t seen you for weeks now. I am doing the best. The very best. Everyone knows that.

“What’s the matter? I smell something different in your aura.”

“Since when did you become a psychic huh?” I sighed. I will sell everything that I had just to see you again. To let you hear me apologize one more time.

Its been two years since I last ended my happy me. A lot of things changed and that make my brother really taking extra careful on his words on me.

As of now, I heard from my sources that you are married. I tried talking to you but you seem dry and don't want to see me. This is my way of sending message to you.

You could have said that you wanted to have a bride, I just could have ended my dreams. Sorry for being nosy about you. Maybe I am still not yet ready to handle love at that time. 

"Wow Margaux, never thought you will be making a delicious wine and not that expensive not like our names" Fijii laughed.

I sip on the wine. My one year exploration has resulted to a great one.

"So what's it called then?"

"Vino E Rimpianto" 

Wine and Regret in italian language. While you are sipping on it, I am also asking myself the what ifs and also did you really love me on that months VJ.