*Ana*
When the carriage enters the town, we start to slow. The wheels clack and wobble as they cross the cobble roads. Our journey is finally coming to an end.
The Dawny castle should be just ahead. My heart jumps up my throat, and I swing to the window to peer out.
“About time,” Maddie relaxes.
"It'll be great to get out of the carriage for a while."
"Mmn," I can barely answer. I’m so distracted by the window and what I see- the streets and buildings are so different from Nochten. Everyone uses brick and wood here.
Although it’s not that late in the day, I find the sun ready to set. The days are short here.
Dawny’s Autumn is much different than Nochten’s. I catch sight of a colored leaf. It drops and catches into the air. I watch it fly over.
I pull my hands under my pits and shiver.
"I don't remember it being this cold."
"Is it always like this?"
Maddie moves a blanket over me. I pull it up over my chest. I am instantly grateful that she brought them.
"You're just used to the heat," Maddie replies knowingly.
"It's been some time since you've been back."
"Oh...I guess so...." But now I see something ahead. It’s growing in the distance- and it’s tall.
“I think I see the castle,” I lean into the window. A chill seeps through the glass and hits my face.
“Do you think...anyone will be waiting for me?
“What a silly thought,” Maddie laughs.
“Is it that funny?” My heart drops.
“I joke. Of course, they are. You wait and see. Everyone will come. You will have the biggest welcome.” Maddie smiles at me. But I’m not sure if I can’t take her word seriously.
Sure enough, Maddie is right, though.There is a procession even from this distance. It’s considerably larger than what I had in Nochten. And it only becomes more evident as we crawl closer. We are just shy of the actual entrance of the castle, and I’m already in awe.
So many people are here.
I see servants in black and white dresses. The nobles are dressed in what looks like rich and puffy outfits. They follow the carriage and roll in with their eyes.
Past them, I find the grand stairs. Atop, I see a woman standing alone. I already know who she is from her stark black hair and her smile. It’s Stepmother. And she wears an immaculate dress of large white puffs and blue velvet bows. Her cape cascades down the steps as her gold crown shines in the setting sun's rays.
But I only see her. I don’t see anyone around her. Are they standing back a bit?
They're waiting for me. The thought made my heart skip.
“Are all these people…for me?” I ask as the carriage comes to a halt. The coachman jumps to open the door.
A cool autumn breeze sneaks through the cabin to have me shiver again.
“What do you think?” Maddie chirps. I look back to the crowd. They are smiling. I feel it set me back.
I’m not used to this.
“But…but why?”
“Because you’re the King’s daughter,” Maddie answers simply.
“Your Empress,” The red-haired coachman holds out his hand. He is not unfriendly, but I feel his hand stiffen with my touch. He doesn’t speak as I step down. Maddie follows behind me.
As soon as I am firmly on the ground, the coach wastes no more time. He and the rest of my traveling party drive off toward the stables. I remain with Maddie at the end of the path as we watch them go.
They seem to be in quite a rush. That is my only thought. I assume they are tired from their journey. And the horses need their rest. It’s that, or they don’t like being here.
But I don’t get to dwell on it as a sweet cry breaks the air.
“Welcome, Empress Anastasia, to Dawny!” The nearby servants cheer and bow in their uniforms all at once.
“Welcome to our kingdom,”
“Ah!” I nearly jumped at the sudden noise. I hobble closer to Maddie to grab her skirt.
‘You’re doing fine,’ Maddie mouths with a gentle push to my back. I swallow down my nervousness.
If you say so. I take a shaky breath. Again, I feel a nudge on my back. She means for me to move.
I venture to shaky steps forward before I hear another cry.
“Your Empress,” The Nobels bow their heads. I see the men dressed in silks and furs as the women curtsy in their puffed dresses.
“Empress Anastasia,”
I blink back at them with shock. I did not expect any kind of welcome such as this. If anything, I’d expected the opposite.
They aren’t scowling or staring at my hair. That may be the biggest shock for me. Everyone's expressions are not disdainful. They look genuinely friendly.
I am not prepared for this at all.
But seeing it gives me some courage. It’s not like back home. I feel like I might actually be welcomed- as I belong.
Still feeling this new courage, I can lift my head and step faster. I make an attempt to look at the stage more thoroughly because I want to see them.
I want to see my father and brother- I actually want to see my stepmother.
It’s an overwhelming sensation that makes my heart skip.
I’m really back in Dawny.
My excitement slows as I come closer. Because I can see something I couldn’t see from below. And when I start to ascend, I become certain of it.
There is only one person standing at the top. She holds her head high as a smile stretches over her soft features. Her gray eyes beam down at me with full attention.
“Greetings, Mother.” I greet first. Maddie stops just shy of stepping up. I feel her warm hands let go with a slight rush of panic. But I hide my unease.
I only dart my eyes around the platform. I don’t see them at all. Are they inside?
Queen Belinda slightly twitches her mouth. But her pleasant features return.
“Empress Anastasia, I welcome you to Dawny. I hope your trip was pleasant.” Belinda emphasizes my title strongly.
She curtsies, and I mirror the same. But I am losing my confidence as I stand here. Why is it only Stepmother?
“Is father inside?”
Queen Belinda tightens her smile.
“The King had to step away to deal with a revolt in one of the villages. So I am to entertain you until his return. Hopefully, it won’t take long.” She explains without a rise in her voice.
I can only nod.
“I see.”
A king needs to take care of such things. I try not to be disappointed. I have to be understanding.
So what about him?
“And brother Nicoli?” I inquire.
“Where is he?”
Belinda’s eye twitches at the question. But she is back to another sweet expression.
“I had hoped to meet him. I have a-“
"Empress Anastasia." Belinda moves swiftly to catch my arm in the loop of hers. I feel almost dragged up because she is so tall. But she leans lower to make up the difference.
Her hand pats mine before resting over it.
“Prince Nicoli has caught a fever and is resting.” Queen Belinda pouts as if saddened by the news.
I feel crushed by the news.
A fever? Is he going to be okay? A sudden well of concern comes over me. It feels like I drank too much water.
But I must be easy to read as she gives me another pat.
“Not to worry. It’s but a mild one. Children often get them. He needs a strict bedrest.” Her voice is calm, and I feel myself having to relax.
With that, we walk toward the castle. But it isn’t a smooth transition. My legs are short, and I struggle to keep in step. It would be fine if she let go, but she pulled me closer when I shifted my arm.
She beams a smile down at me, and I feel trapped. I have to try to put up with it.
Ahead, the castle doors open. Inside is the foyer with the chandelier. I instantly recall the dread I’ve had about it.
It still hangs like a ghost that haunts a house. I have to frown. I’ve never liked that chunk of crystal.I get nervous whenever I look at it. Especially when I see it start to swing, it looks so heavy up there and wants to fall.
I was always scared it would fall on me. I still am. The fear is not gone.
“I hope brother Nicoli will be better soon,” I try to ignore the swing death rock.
Behind me, I feel Maddie. She’s picking up my skirt. I check on her to see her beam a smile back. It’s much warmer than Stepmothers.
Queen Belinda frowns at something. She mutters under her breath.
“Nasty habit.”
“What is?” I ask, looking around. Was someone doing something?
“Ah, your ears. I forgot.” Queen Belinda laughs softly.
I feel her slightly grip my hand with her nails. It doesn’t hurt, but I can’t help but want to pull myself away. That doesn’t seem like an option, though.
“Have you ever had tea, Empress Anastasia?” Queen Belinda carries on.
“No, we don’t drink tea in Nochten,” We have coffee sent in from the colonies.
Queen Belinda smirks for some reason. I feel her long nails graze my skin a bit more. It still doesn’t hurt, but I feel myself shiver.
“Then I think it best to have a taste. I shall have something set up for you.” Queen Belinda coos with a knowing smile.
“We'll have a nice, private tea. Just for us."
"For us?” I look behind me at Maddie. She is smiling, but her eyebrows are starting to bunch up.
“We can catch up.” Queen Belinda carries on.
“Ah,” I nod. It sounds reasonable.
“Then let’s do that.”
“I am so glad.” Queen Belinda curls her lips into a new kind of smile. It’s kinda sharp looking.
How odd. I think, but toss the thought aside.
*Nicoli*
As they walked on, a pair of blue eyes peeked down from between the banister above. The boy was in awe of the girl’s silver hair. It was like nothing he had seen before.
So, of course, he had to consider the owner with more care. The first thing he could note was how much smaller she was. And she looked frail with her thin arms and legs.
I thought she was supposed to be older. Nicoli thought and touched his head to measure.
She’s no bigger than me-“Your majesty, there you are!” One young blond maid harshly whispered upon spotting the stole away at the stairs.
“You are supposed to be in bed!” The maid cried and went to help the boy up.
“What are you thinking just to sneak out? If the queen finds you out here, there goes my head,”
“I only wanted to see her,” Nicoli replied and took her hand. He pouted with a trained cast down of his eyes. It had the result he wanted. The young blond cooed before furrowing with guilt.
“Aye, you are just curious.” The maid went and threw a glimpse to catch the supposed guest.
Sure enough, she could see the telltale mark of her silver hair.No wonder he was curious. Anyone would be.
“The great failure of Dawny.” was what Queen Belinda’s maids referred to her as.
But the maid couldn’t see such a thing. She thought the girl looked quite the opposite.“She’s much prettier than I thought she’d be. Ain't she?”
Nicoli nodded in silent observance. His blue eyes seemed to be glued to the girl who was walking with his mother. They disappeared around a corner.
“But we can’t stay here, your majesty.” The maid again remembered herself.
“It's the queen's orders. So now, let's get back before she finds out, okay?” The maid gently squeezed his hand, and they began to walk.
“Okay,” Nicoli chirped with a practiced smile that made the girl coo again.
“Such a sweet child.” The maid couldn’t think of any child more perfectly willed.
While the maid turned back to look ahead, Nicoli took his chance. He swiftly lifted the skeleton key from the servant's pocket and shoved it into his sleeve.
*Ana* We are escorted to a set of guest rooms that are freshly cleaned with flowers in every vase. The rooms smell sweet and airy. And it feels bright with the yellow wallpaper and soft cream-colored furniture. It was more than adequate for anyone staying in the castle. But I feel odd about having to use it. Why can't I use my old bedroom? I remember having one of my own. Though I can’t say exactly what that looked like. But I did. So why not just let me use that? Unless someone else uses it now. It strikes me that they might not be free anymore. It might be his now. I smile when I think of him. If that's the case... I don’t mind the room change. It’s insignificant to me. "What you smiling about?"Maddie is in the middle of unpacking. She opens trunks to pull out packed clothes. "I was thinking that this isn't my room." "Oh? You remember that?" Maddie pauses to roll a pair of socks. "I'm surprised you can. You were so young when you left." I lessen my smile a little at tha
*Ana* Maddie was right. I feel dismal as the temperature drops the closer the maid guides us outside. She leads me down the patio steps toward the gardens. All the while, I try not to shiver obviously but it’s becoming more frequent. The Autumn chill is no joke. I have to pull the shawls closer. But they are not effective and the cold stabs through. Worse, it’s just around my shoulder. My feet and legs are getting the worse end of the deal. The chilly air seems to lick at them. I should have just put on that stupid dress. I am suffering silently. Ahead of the maid, I can make out a stoned seating area. A table has been set with china and snacks on tiers. The table has two chairs. One is empty as Stepmother sits in the other. Upon seeing her, I dart my eyes about. I’m hoping to find another smaller figure. Someone that should be either shorter or around my height. But, as we draw over, my expectations die. There is no one else around. It is going to be just the two of us. Thoug
*Ana* “Queen is how I’d prefer you call me if you don’t mind. Since we are not related, after all.” Queen Belinda smiles to thin out her lips. Her blunt white teeth look sharp even though she is human. She doesn’t have fangs but I feel like if she did- she would be lashing out at them. But why? I look at her so confused. My head starts to shake before I even know it is. Why are you looking at me like this? “But, we're family-“ “Empress Anastasia,” She again addresses by title. “I’ve been in society long enough to recognize those of talent. You, my dear, I can validate. You may do great things one day.” Queen Belinda motions for Julia. The maid pours more tea into my still-full cup. I see it begin to overflow and stain the tablecloth. It grows up to the edge of the table and threatens to spill over. I have to quickly switch away less it drip and burns me. “What are you-“ I look to Julia, but Queen Belinda demands my attention. “You have no mother and will never know how it is
*Ana* After my Stepmother leaves, I don’t move from the table. My mind is blank as I feel the events linger. I’m trying to make sense of things, but it doesn’t stay still enough. It keeps rolling around in my head. I can still feel her kick under the table- her phantom nails grating over my skin. But the final blow was to hear that I won’t see brother or father.- that he doesn’t want to see me. She could say all of this without losing her smile. “It can’t be…” My voice comes too late. No one is here to hear me. I have no one to listen. I’m not sure it could change anything, though. Even if I had spoken up then, what could I say? What could I prove? Did I have anything to counter her with? That I was safe? That Father wanted me? But then why wasn’t he here? Was it really true that he had to leave? Or was that an excuse? What proof do I have? Did I have proof that it wasn’t true? Nothing. This is the quickest answer that comes to mind. I have nothing. What I have is a single le
*Side note to readers: song recommendation while you read. Try Once Upon A December by Emilie Pandolfi* I groan while stirring from sleep. My eyes burn as I flutter myself awake. But they give me the chance to adjust to the darkness. Each blink helps clear my sight as I see better at night. And it is night. Some time deep into it. I can tell by how dark it looks outside from the windows. “Maddie?” I am up. My eyes scan the room, for her but see nothing. However, I find that the trunks are all closed and stacked up. Maddie must have finished packing and gone off to bed. The sight brings a small smile of relief. We can leave as soon as it’s morning now. I feel myself grow a little warm at the thought. Home never sounded so wonderful as it did right now. Home. I never thought I would look at it like that before. Until now, I had thought this was- At least I know people will be waiting for me. They have to. But the thought gives me no solace. I feel myself grow cold again. I mo
I must be in the right direction. The song is getting louder. Thank god, I’m relieved that I’m going the right way. It's been a couple of minutes of following down the strange hall. And it would be a waste if I wasn’t. I’ve been trying to remember this when I turn- so I can find my way back. I don't want to be lost. But it’s easy to get distracted by what I found here. My eyes can’t seem to stop themselves from roaming. But seeing it has proven one thing for sure, this hall is abandoned. It has to be. It’s full of discarded pieces with little to no organization. As if this were the land of castaways- I see furniture covered up in big white sheets and portraits piled on each other. Unidentifiable pieces of wood and building supplies are bundled haphazardly together- as if someone intended to come back for them. But that must have been who knows how long ago. Everything has a thick coat of dust. I move my hand to trace a line over an exposed armrest. It’s clean against the thick c
*Ana* "What is this place?" I feel a little silly to even ask. Because I know what it is. Sorta. It’s a room. But it’s not like I’ve ever seen it. The colors are so vivid- I must blink to ensure my eyes aren’t playing with me. I want to say they could be because I’ve been in the dark for so long that it’s not adjusting to the light just yet. But they’re fine. My eyes are not seeing things. I am standing in a room like that which I’ve never seen. And I’m blown away right there. If I had to break it down, the room should start with the walls. They have painted shades of blue in yellow of the likes I have never seen. It’s almost garish in the shade- seldom used in nature. It’s a color I never expect to find in my palace. But that is just the walls. What is inside the room is as follows- a lush purple carpet that sinks in with every step. It borders most of the room save for the sides where the furniture is. I see toys everywhere- they litter the ground. I see trains, building blocks
“Hello, little brother,” I repeat. But I still don't believe it. I never thought I would get to say those words. Let alone see the very face that is my brother. This must be a dream. Or not- as I hear another snore from him. It breaks the fantasy- only proving that this has to be real. I don’t think anyone ever dreams about someone else snoring. But still, I can’t help but stare on. “He’s adorable.” I find myself needing to gush over him. His face looks so sweet, like a little doll- a miniature of my father in almost all the ways, save for the beard. But outside of that, I am happy. It's good he takes after Father. Better than the alternative-if he happened to take after my stepmother more- I don’t think I could do that. I already know. It would make this very difficult. Just thinking of her makes me shiver. What a scary woman. Was she always like this? I can't remember. But there is something I was right about. If this was his room, which it had to be-This child is well tak
*Ana*I would have thought that most would have gone ahead and skipped today, what with it being rather colder, but I quickly find I am wrong. Even in the cold, the rose garden is bustling with others. My simple walk in the cold winter morning is not so simple, turning more into a social outing, whether I like it or not.As such, I must present myself accordingly. I control my smile to be gentle and inviting just as the first wave comes over. “Your Empress, The noblemen bow in unison. “Sir Pendwick.” They nod their heads to him, next. “A beautiful morning, is it not?” Their outfits look fine, rich, and most importantly warm, for the cold weather.“It certainly is a clear sky,” I remark, noticing their noses turning pink from the cold. It makes me wonder how long they have been out here, and a better question, why. But I let the thought pass, thinking it better not to ask, simply wanting to get back to our walk.“Good morning,” I nod in their direction before turning with Pendwick in
*King Alexander*“They grow up so fast,” Alexander mused as he watched what used to be his little boy, turned now young man, take back inside. Nicoli’s face bright with excitement as he rushed back with no other thought than Ana. How Alexander envied him, then. “Damn, and here I hoped we would talk a bit longer.” Alexander pouted.“He’s just excited about the news.” Johan went. “He’ll be back.”“Aye, I get that.” Alexander would have liked to have a bit more time together. He knew the years of traveling between Nochten and Dawny had put a distance between them. His own son not even sure to hug him anymore, Alexander reflected.“Still, I’d like just a moment.” It was like they were strangers to each other. But, then, it was the price he had to pay, after all. Alexander knew that something would have to give after putting more effort on Ana than him. So he couldn’t hold it against him. Besides, it was good to see his reaction.He’s just excited for Ana. I understand his joy. Alexander
*Nicoli*“Mother,” Nicoli barely spoke, short of breath, as he rounded the stairs. His mother already on her way down, with Julia in close tow. “You shouldn’t run, Nicoli. ” Belinda reprimed with a slight shake of her head, “it’s unbecoming of a Monarch.” But she stopped as if to wait. Seeming to want him to join her side. Something Nicoli had no problem doing. Because Nicoli knew what she really wanted. And he moved without needing to be asked. Taking her hand into the crook of his arm, it earned him a gentle smile back. Her angry already half dissolved by the act.And further diminished by Nicoli tacking on his best smile.“Forgive me, Mother, I was just excited to find Father coming home earlier than expected.” Nicoli went before noticing the slight pink hue around her eyes. Making his smile thin a little. She was crying again. His eyes darted to Julia. She gave the barest of nods to confirm he was right. But even then, she said nothing to betray her master. Her steadfast loyalt
*Nicoli*“It’s here, it’s here!” Nicoli’s elation only heightened the further he moved. His long legs take him in leaps and bounds leaving everyone behind.Why, he was already taking the stairs before he dared another glance down at his letters. He knew he shouldn’t, it wasn’t wise to be distracted when climbing the stairs. But Nicoli was more coordinated than most. And he trusted his balance and memory of the castle. Even if he didn’t, Nicoli would have caved to his excitement anyway. It happened each time he got another letter. Nicoli would lose his crafted mature and pleasant demeanor, which everyone loved so much, for that of an excited child in an instant. Ana just had that effect on him.And Nicoli would not restrain himself when it came to her. Not anymore, not after so many years. And so, his eyes freely roamed over the letters. Passing over Hidi’s careful cursive and yellow seal for the red seal. It was Ana’s letter that he wanted to read most. Hidi’s of course, would be r
*Julia*Julia was already out before the posthorse was even taken to the stable. And Like clockwork, she took her spot to stand and wait as the mail was delivered over to Postmaster Nettle. Her presence shocking no one. Why, it was such a common sight to see her now that Nettle nor the other servants even stirred. The silent old woman’s presence was nothing to them. She was simply a part of the process. And like always, she waited and watched for Nettle to approach with hawk-like precision. But regardless of her cold approach or silent pressure, Nettle still kept his own. He would not move faster, even for the queen’s handmaid. He only nodded to her in greeting.“Ah, Julia, I see you have ears like a cat.” he joked. “You arrived just in time. I’ve just received the post.”“PostMaster Nettle,” Julia returned stiffly, already looking past him. Her eyes scanned the letters on the golden tray in his hands. They immediately went to the return addresses. She already vying to see where th
*Ana*Is it really time? Can I really do it at last? The thoughts swim in my head as I dash away from Father. The breeze lifts my shawl as I move.Can I write to Nicoli? I knew this day would come. But now that it’s here, I am almost overwhelmed.It doesn’t feel real to me. After going through so much, the first blood, the coronation, the trade problems, Mykhol’s departure, and countless other things. So much has happened since then. It just never felt like it would happen. But here I am, running. And it feels so unreal. Nothing does now. I can’t even feel the ground under my feet as I move. Everything seems to slow down, or I move even faster.I am only vaguely aware of the sound. It’s my heart. It hits against my chest like a drum and by the time I am back inside, a slight wave of dizziness is swimming over me.But I can’t stop. I won’t stop. I am driven like a moth to a flame. It is like I am floating through the halls. And my body feels weightless as I come to my door.“Naska!” I
*Ana*Is this where I get my work ethic from? It’s fair to make the argument because I am surprised how immediate Father is to start as soon as we get back inside. I don’t think I’ve ever seen him so seriously.But he is. And I can’t say I’m not glad about it. When he said get to work, he meant it. Immediately after Mykhol departed, one of the first and most important things Father sought to fix was the supply issue.He made it all look so simple. A new trade route was established going through the Almony mountains, not our desert. And secondly, Almony, not our Nocthen merchants, would be used going forward. This, of course, caused quite the outburst in court, not to have any Nochten’s but foreigners involved. I included. But Father assured me that they would be reliable thanks to his own experience. Even Hidi has vouched for them through letters, among other things. As for the other things, Hidi sounded peeved in her letter. Something about doing surprise visits instead of correspo
*Naska*“I will hold things down until you are back.” Naska managed to whisper, finally having that spare moment alone with Mykhol all morning.Otherwise, I’ll never get my chance. Naska gave a sharp glare behind her to the crowd. Somehow, word had spread overnight of Mykhol’s departure. Thus, why did so many come despite the early morning? They had come to bid their farewells.On any other day, Naska would have warmed at the sight. It demonstrated how many gave their support to him. She would have gloated, prideful at how much power Mykhol had by the display.But the high number of girls in the crowd kept her escalations at bay. The sight of so many in the audience cooled Naska down with their pained expressions and wanton eyes. Eyes, which were all directed at Mykhol, no less. Naska clenched her hand at the sight.Back off, he’s mine. Naska wished she could break away right there and start throttling them. Harm them and something more, that is, until she felt his cool finger graze
*Ana*“Cousin?” I start again finding his silence. Mykhol stiffens but his eyes remain on the door. I almost wish he would turn around and start yelling. But we just continue to stand in silence.“Are you upset?” “Does it matter?” Mykhol’s voice is so quiet that I almost miss it. “Cousin, I don’t want to fight.” I close my hands and take another moment to muster the courage. If I just explain things clearly, he won’t be upset. I’m sure if I explain myself. My reasoning, Mykhol will understand. He will understand. “Cousin, I want to explain myself.” I try again. “From a practical standpoint, you going back to school will be-”“Always so practically aren’t you?” Mykhol’s voice cuts through mine. “Almost to the point of being heartless.” His eyes are like fire. They burn and hurt as they stare down at me. “But I’m sure you’ve heard that one before, right?”I have to dart my eyes and swallow again.“Heartless?”I repeat as an awful memory resurfaces. The whispers and jarring stares