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33. Flames & Blazing Fire
Last Updated:
2025-01-08 09:16:45
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When Regret Isn't Enough 34. The Closer I Get To You
Amanza sat there in this unintended place, time, and position, gazing at every inch of him. His intense magnetic pull caused her to vocalize her emotions and attraction to him willingly. Holland's bare flesh drew her closer to lhim as she lean against him and whispers in his ear, "Holland, is it possible that I still love you? What are these feelings?”Only the light from the fireplace shown on his beautiful upper body and gave off an amber glow. He looked so appealing and appetizing. Amanza could not withhold the emotions or tears from falling at the thought that she could have almost lost him. Getting a grip on herself, wiping her tears.She undressed him, wrapping his neck in a dry, warm towel. He was exhausted! Holland had not opened his eyes once since entering the house. Removing her leg from around him, she realized that she had to remove those wet pants."How do I get these wet pants off?" Hesitating and hesitating to touch them.Amanza convinces herself to be brave. 'After a
Last Updated : 2025-01-09When Regret Isn't Enough 35. A Delicious Body
He was lying on his stomach with his head and one arm wrapped over her thighs and the other arm wrapped around her waist and back. His face was under her sweater, pressed against her bare stomach, seeking warmth from her flesh.Realizing this, Amanza feels currents of fire blaze through her body, waking dormant parts and beaming them to life! Unpredictably, she moans lightly. Holland makes no sounds other than light breathing. She looks down at him, unknowingly awakening thoughts of their past times. His hand is now under her cashmere sweater, touching her bare skin again. Amanza breathes in profoundly, trying to contain the ignition in her core. She says, "He's sleeping and has no idea what's happening."A few minutes pass, and she can feel him changing his position again. He was like a child in his mother's lap, trying to find warmth and comfort. He turns on his side, placing his hands securely on both sides of her hips around to her backside.His other arm is positioned around the
Last Updated : 2025-01-09When Regret Isn't Enough 36. We Have A Past
Amanza stood in the doorway, watching him prepare the food. The delicious smell of breakfast filled the cabin. She couldn't wait to taste what he had prepared. He intently watched the food as he stirred and flipped the eggs while calmly telling her what he needed next:“Baby, I need our plates.”Hearing him call her baby initially felt odd and uncomfortable, but Amanza decided to relax and enjoy the moment. It made her think about what their marriage should have felt like. She permitted herself to smile inside whenever he called her baby and promptly responded, “Coming right up!”They sit in front of the fireplace and eat breakfast together, stealing glances at one another. Amanza struggles with all her mixed feelings.“Holland.........either this is tasty, or I'm starving."He slides closer to her, his knees touching hers. With each bite she takes, he smiles. Holland enjoys the movement of her mouth.“I'm never going to be able to finish my food if you are going to stare at me like th
Last Updated : 2025-01-10When Regret Isn't Enough 37. Let's Go Deeper
Holland's arm came around her without any reservations as he held her head to his shoulder, the way a small child is comforted. Holland held her in his arms until her sobs weakened and slowed. The way a thunderstorm fades away on a summer day. Tears, like rain, still fell, but the power of her fears was relieved.Amanza uttered. “I know you have a kind heart, Holland. I’m just sad it took all of this for me to see this side of you again. But I want to thank you for making such a willing sacrifice to help me. All I could think about now was that you didn’t return. It frightens me to death even now. Thank goodness you made it back to me.”Sniffling as the tears drop. Holland takes her in his arms, pulling Amanza closer and hugging her tightly. He softly says in her ear. “I know, I felt the same way. I was so worried about possibly freezing to death all alone. I couldn’t fail you again since I was in our marriage. But I promise you, I'm here now, and we're together.”Holland's hand cares
Last Updated : 2025-01-10When Regret Isn't Enough 38. What You Deserve
“How can you say that? The very reason we are divorced is because you let Susie interfere in our marriage and life. And now she's having your baby. What a month for now! Holland, it sounds like the cycle has been repeated. If you think about it, isn't that how Collin came along?"Holland hung his head."You are right, Holland; apples don’t fall far from the tree. You're exhibit A,” Amanza stated, staring at him.Holland shook his head no, feeling ashamed. For the first time, his eyes were opened in a way that had never been before. He never thought deeply about what had occurred and that his father was equally at fault for demolishing his happy childhood. He felt awful about allowing the same thing to happen again in his marriage to Amanza."Amanza..." He took her hand, holding it tight. Holland was grateful she didn't pull away. "Honestly, I never gave it a thought. I feel so embarrassed that I allowed this to happen again."Holland knew any sane man would want Amanza as their wife, a
Last Updated : 2025-01-11When Regret Isn't Enough 39. Is It Over
The great sea parted the earth, and it felt like it moved below her feet! When she felt the warmth of his mouth on hers. Glory be to Earth and Heaven! Her heart uttered inside.Holland captured her lips in a kiss so tender and soft but sizzling hot that she could have melted like snow. He held her in his sweet embrace. With each kiss, her lips began to burn more and more. Amanza felt her heart beat faster than the normal pace. It was a mystery. His kiss had her head spinning, and she began to wonder what Holland had done to her.It was as if she was suspended in animation. She became lost inside of him. Each touch and kiss was sweeter than the taste of a midnight rendezvous, so sensuous....was the look on his face when he loved her tenderly. Holland made love to Amanza without taking off her clothes; he spoke a language to her body, so universal.Holland whispers, “Hold me, keep me warm inside you, and love me. Girl, this is true: I would die for you.”The music in her heart began at
Last Updated : 2025-01-11When Regret Isn't Enough 40 - Follow Your Heart
The most adventurous thing Amanza ever did was marry a man without her father's approval, and then she had to hide her identity. Now, that feeling of being adventurous was returning, and she wanted to do something she might regret later. But her curiosity was begging to be let loose. She moistened her lips and became more straightforward with Holland, making it easy for him to follow his heart."Uhm, well..." Holland said excitedly as his heart thumped inside him. Hoping she was about to be all his for tonight. But he doesn't want to let go of what he's feeling right now. It doesn't want the feeling to be temporary. Or just one perfect night. “The storm will be over, and we will leave here in the morning. And I don’t know if you’ll wait for me or even return to me. I want to know that before we go any further.” Holland told her honestly.“Boy, the tables have turned.” She chuckled. “This is a discussion a woman usually has with a man. So, you’re saying what we have right now isn’t wha
Last Updated : 2025-01-12When Regret Isn't Enough 41 - Cover Blown UP
Before Holland could respond, Susie had flung herself into his arms, hugging him around his waist. Though heavily pregnant, she is aggressive, forcing herself on him. Limber and enthusiastic, she pulled him over to the couch."Take it easy. How are you feeling?" He asked, looking at her stomach, which is eight months. "I feel fine. Now that you are back home. I prepared a nice candlelight dinner for us.”“I’m not hungry.”"Come and have a seat at the table anyway. Let me pour you a drink?" "No! I said I'm not hungry! Do you ever listen to me?!" Holland said as he stood for a second, glaring at her. He was agitated and struggling with whether he should just say it. But every time, he looked at the roundness of her belly. He decided to relax. He took off his jacket and sat back down on the sofa.Susie came and sat close to him. "You've been gone for two days, and I had no idea whether you were hurt or in a hospital. Are you glad to see me? Me and the baby missed you. I was so worried
Last Updated : 2025-01-12
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When Regret Isn't Enough 54. Getting Over It
Collin needed a drink! He couldn't believe Olivia hadn’t contacted him! You see, the night of the storm, he failed to get her phone number from her a month ago. She's the only other girl that made him feel something besides Deja. He’d thought long and hard about it, and Collin knew she was the one he could see himself starting a family with. That’s right. He wanted to have his own family to love and cherish. He knew it sounded strange, but that had been his secret thoughts. He’s headed to the club to meet his friend Tony Jones. "I called Tony and a few other guys. Tony said he couldn't wait to see me!"Tony Jones is the guy Collin made good friends with when he worked at Wright’s Jewelry. Collin was looking forward to seeing Tony. "Hey, baby, can we get some drinks over here?" he called out to the waitress, looking forward to a cold one. The rest of the guys arrived shortly after he had downed his first beer. Everyone was having a good time laughing and talking about the sights in
When Regret Isn't Enough 53. No More Pain
Collin’s PerspectiveA week had passed. Collin knew he needed time to purge himself emotionally from his firm and close connection to Deja Amanza Wright. He filed away all the memories of wishing, thinking, and dreaming about the girl he had wanted for so long but would never have by his side. Collin sadly mumbled. "It's done."He flexed his hands open, then closed them tight against his knees, trying to push back the tidal wave of tears he felt. Logically, he knew that this was what he had to do. The pain coursed through his body to his broken heart. He couldn't keep hoping that he had an opportunity when there was none. So now it’s time to do and see things differently. If I stay in the same place emotionally, I fear I will be stuck and never move past my devastating loss. And as much as he wanted to hold on to these memories, never to let a single one of them fade. He prayed out loud. “Oh! God forbid let these memories disappear completely before they drown me.”Each day at work
When Regret Isn't Enough 52. End Of A Dream
“And, if I can have a second chance to capture love again, I think it will all be worth it.” “I wish things would have turned out differently. It would make my life so much easier if it were.""It's okay, Collin. Love can be a complicated thing. But it doesn't have to be if you find the right person for you. I’m not the right girl for you. Love can't be explained or quantified; it is something you must experience, and when you do, you will know. I promise you will know." Collin nodded, “Okay…I get it; it doesn't have to be me. I’ll accept that; I will be your friend. But do I have to be your brother-in-law? Yuk!”“Don’t make me laugh.” “No, I'm serious. I don’t get why it has to be Holland. He’s been a jerk all my life.” “No matter how I try to explain it, I know you, Collin. You will never understand. So don’t wreck your brain trying to figure me out. You probably will never get it because you have never been in love or married.”“So, I’m not on your level.” “That’s right…I have
When Regret Isn't Enough 51. What Could Have Been
Tonight, Deja's heart broke as tears came to her eyes. She couldn’t face him or answer his question, so she turned her back to him. “Collin, don't ask me that.” “Please, Deja,” He said, taking hold of her shoulders from behind. “I’m trying all I can to appeal to your sense of reasoning. She hung her head, shaking it, saying no.Collin Halston had been a longtime friend of the Wright family since Deja entered college. They had met and became close. Having Collin in her life over time made her rethink a few things. Deja wasn’t sure how she felt about him associating with her dad. Clinton and her father took a liking to Collin almost immediately. As time passed, he became a mentor and took Collin under his wing. Occasionally, her father would ask her that question during her college days. If I loved Collin, it would have made me highly defensive.Deja thought, ‘Why did I get so defensive when I asked that question.’“Deja, why are you crying? Who are you worried about? If you want to
When Regret Isn't Enough 50. What Should I Do
Tonight, Deja's heart broke as tears came to her eyes. She couldn’t face him or answer his question, so she turned her back to him. “Collin, don't ask me that.” “Please, Deja,” He said, taking hold of her shoulders from behind. “I’m trying all I can to appeal to your sense of reasoning. She hung her head, shaking it, saying no.Collin Halston had been a longtime friend of the Wright family since Deja entered college. They had met and become close. Over time, Having Collin in her life made her rethink a few things. Deja wasn’t sure how she felt about him associating with her dad. Clinton and her father took a liking to Collin almost immediately. As time passed, he became a mentor and took Collin under his wing. Occasionally, during her college days, her father asked her that question. If I loved Collin, it made me highly defensive.Deja thought, ‘Why did I get so defensive when I asked that question.’“Deja, why are you crying? Who are you worried about? If you want to give us a chan
When Regret Isn't Enough 49. Don't Do Go Back
“Oh…Collin, my father had no right to ask you that.”“I never had the chance to tell you how I feel, but I should let you know now that I got angry about your meeting with Holland.”“Collin,” Amanza took a deep breath and considered her following words carefully. "Collin, you're a great guy, and I care about you. However, I don't see this developing into a relationship if that's what you're looking for from me."He stared at her blankly like he hadn't heard her. Did he hear what she said? "You don't see it going anywhere?" he asked quietly. "No, I don't, I'm sorry." If he were hurt, he wouldn't have shown it. There was no anger or pain in his eyes. “Have you forgotten? I was there for you to pick up the pieces last time.”Amanza rolled her eyes. “This is not about Olivia but me?” “Yes, I don’t want to see you hurt again, Deja.” Placing her hand gently on Collin’s masculine hand in a reassuring manner. “Look, I’m a big girl and can care for myself. I’ve learned a lot, and I don’
When Regret Isn't Enough 48. He Will Disappointed You
"I don't know about us getting back together...but I did not know how I felt about him and was angry. All I can say is we talked and covered a lot like two grown-ups, and I know how I feel about him...""I'm still not following," he said quietly. "Even though our relationship is in question, I knew I loved him at one time, and he loved me. We've been married for three years, and after being divorced for six months. In two nights, we still found an attraction between us and chemistry. That’s all I’m going to say, do you understand?" Collin nodded his head slowly, thinking about him and Olivia. "So, you're keeping your options open but not hoping you two get back together. Right?” "Exactly. I’m keeping my options open. If he’s not the right guy. I'll move on." He stared at the table for a moment. "Have you ever considered the possibility that you're just emotional right now after going through the storm and so much this year? And since Holland happened to be there, it’s not mistake
When Regret Isn't Enough 47. Think About Forgiving
"Hi, Deja." The masculine voice said with a hint of reservedness."Hey Collin, how are you?" “I’m okay.” “Thanks for inviting me out to dinner. I know this must be about Olivia, right?” She says, still staring at him strangely."Deja?" Collin calls her name.“Uhm, yes,” “What’s wrong? Why are you staring at me?”“O,h nothing."Ah, where are my manners?" Collin says, quickly standing to pull out a chair."Here, have a seat."Amanza takes a seat, still staring at him. She didn't know if Collin wanted to talk about anything serious with her or if he was just looking for a good time with his friend. But he wouldn't get anything from her that went on between her and Holland if that’s why he asked her for dinner."I ordered you a glass of red wine. Would you prefer white or something else?" "No red is fine. It's usually what I drink," Amanza says, still staring as she raises the glass to her lips. Collin sips his tequila, smiling nervously and showing a hint of curiosity about her behav
When Regret Isn't Enough 46. Heart Exposed
“Deja, I know me. I won’t tolerate no family being involved in my relationships. Girl, you know I’m outspoken. And if he’s anything like his brother, he could keep stepping. I won’t let anybody treat me like I’m less than them. No point intended.”“Trust me, I didn’t take it that way. And Holland was so different at the start of our marriage. But Collin doesn’t have the same issues that Holland has with the family. The family has disowned Collin, and Holland is the beloved older brother. I think they all mistreat Collin because of the dread of stepmother syndrome. I would put my head on a chopping block, and she’d be behind the wedge between Collin, his dad, and Holland. Holland still has his issues, but I think that can be improved with time.” “Wait a minute. Why do you feel that way? Have you been talking to Holland, missy?”Amanza smiles. “I know my ex. He is a made jerk, not a born one. I just have a hunch. Collin is a good guy, and he’s open-minded. Hey Olivia, he said for me to
