LillyThe moment I spotted Rick, my spirits lifted. After all, I’ve known him for almost two decades. We got along better than Jack and I. He understood me better than Jack.“You look tired.” Rick mumbled into my hair as he hugged me, then spun me around.I giggled. Probably not a good scenario if caught by the paparazzi.“Geez, thanks! You don’t look so great yourself,” I scoffed.In his suit, he looked much older than his thirty-four years. It was probably why Noona preferred him wearing suits. She didn’t want anyone to get wind that he was six years younger.“I got us some food.” He pointed to platters on the table. “Strawberry poppyseed salad, and a Mediterranean sandwich, just in case you’re not in the mood for a salad.”Oddly, my stomach churned but I ignored it. It had been a weird day.“Thank you. How much do I owe you?”“It’s on me.” He grinned wide. “I want to hear all the details about what the hell is going on.”I groaned, shooting a glance over my shoulder. “It’s a long s
Lilly“Are you sure you’ll be okay?” Rick asked for the tenth time since we left D.C. Thankfully, this would be the last time for his question because we were in front of my home. Even better was that all the paparazzi were gone. Chance must have come through with his promise of fixing it all. “Noona can stay with you,” he suggested.Another wave of nausea rolled through me. God, I’d kill for ginger ale.“I’m sure,” I assured him as I pulled on the door handle of his BMW. He’d need Noona to take care of him. “Have your wife put ice on your face when you get home. Otherwise, you’ll look like Rocky tomorrow.”He choked out a laugh. “If I was Rocky, your boss would have never landed a punch.”I leaned over, pressed a kiss on his cheek. “I’m sorry this happened.”He waved his hand. “It happens every day.”I rolled my eyes, and exited the car. “Tell Noona I’ll call her later.”Shutting the door, I watched him drive away. And the entire time my doctor’s words played on repeat in my mind. Ch
LillyAs I sat behind my desk, I nervously waited for an open window to catch Chance. I’d been at work for two hours, but he’d sent a message to Kimberly and I not to be disturbed.The message I sent him last night showed he’d seen it, but no response came. Only one missed call. From my boss. God, I hoped Chance would take the news well. He was good with my daughters, but we never talked about children. It was a moot point since I couldn’t have any more. Or at least I thought so.“How are you feeling?” Kimberly startled me out of my thoughts. “You’re still pale.”It’ll be my complexion for a while.“Much better today.”I glanced toward the door where the man who stole my heart sat behind his executive desk. Still no word and lunchtime approached rapidly.I stood up and smoothed down my skirt. Black pencil skirt and white blouse. I couldn’t handle green today. My fingers trembled and I interlocked them together. I knocked on the door, determination settled deep in the pit of my stomach
Lilly“Thank you for picking me up,” I said again.Noona drove like a goddamn maniac but it was better than taking Chance’s car. Regardless of whose name was on the title.“I want to kill the fucker,” she growled, though it looked a tad bit comical.“I knew Dr. Packard would see you right away,” she continued, abruptly changing subjects. “At thirty-five, you're at a higher risk.”I sighed. “Thirty-four.”She waved one hand, then glanced at the clock. “We’ll have five minutes to spare.”We were ten minutes away from my OB/GYN.“Not if you kill us with your driving in the process,” I muttered.I had to wonder about life’s funny ways. It took me years to get pregnant with Saoirse, and took three years to get pregnant with Sierra. But apparently with Chance it took no time at all.“I’m just so fucking mad,” she continued. “I could spit fire. I don’t understand why you’re so calm.”I turned to gaze out the window, the blur of trees in my vision. “It wouldn’t be good for the baby to get up
LillyFriday. Departure day. Putting the past behind me.It was a little past noon when Rick came through my door.“Hey beautiful girls,” he greeted. Everyone screeched and ran to give him a hug.“Are we going now?” Saoirse asked, ready to get her adventure started.“We have a few hours,” he kneeled down as he responded. “Go through your room and double check you haven’t forgotten anything.”She nodded and sprinted up the stairs. Rick sauntered to me, pecking me on the cheek. His eye was still bruised.“Hey there, Rocky.”“I wish I could say you should see the other guy, but I never punched him back,” he mused.“I know,” I patted his cheek gently. “You took the high road.”“So, what are you and Noona up to, taking off to Croatia?”“Kind of spur of the moment, you know,” I answered blushingly, uncomfortable with my lies. “Thanks for letting her join me in a few weeks.”“Ahmmm,” he added pensively. “I don’t buy it. Why don’t you try again?”I glanced at him exasperatedly. “You are such
TWO WEEKS LATERI miscalculated. Misjudged. Bottom line, I fucked up.Staring at the text message, I was left hollow. Empty. For a week straight, I’d gone back to the message and read it again and again.Pregnant. Twins. Left.My gut wrenched. My chest cracked.I pushed her too hard and wanted too much. My jealousy. My fucked-up, arrogant ways. My temper. My blind jealousy. I fought so hard to keep her and lost her anyway.After that text, I drove to her house to find it fucking empty. I called her. Over and over again. I had private investigators looking for her. Her house in Croatia, the one she let my mother use. Nothing. The town where she lived with her parents. Nothing. I even went after Rick and Noona, until those two disappeared too. They landed in Zagreb and then fucking nothing.The day she walked out my door replayed over and over again. Every look. Every word.She’d said goodbye that day. Except I was too stupid to hear it.I recalled the way her dark eyes flashed with hur
LillyThe little village of Brsečine on the Dalmatian Coast in Croatia was where I found myself.The old stone dwelling gave off dreamy vibes and the dwelling held so much history.A decade ago, I fell in love with the 16th century old stone villa, which was a summer residence to a celebrated local Renaissance artist, situated in a valley-like spot on the way to Dubrovnik. The house had thirteen bedrooms, some inhabitable currently. Eventually it’d be ridiculously too large for our family, but I clung to this dream of one day having a large family and having reunions with all the people I cared about and loved.And then there was the dream of turning it into a small beach rental with an exit right to the beach and a magnificent terrace with a view of the sea. The beautiful courtyard reminded me of the story about Romeo and Juliet. The whole place just had so much character. From almost any point in the house or the yard, you could see the Adriatic Sea stretched for miles and a protect
LillyKai and his father arrived.Sienna ran past all of us and threw herself into Kai’s arms like she hadn’t seen him in a year. I couldn’t quite decide whether to cry or roll my eyes. Cursed hormones.I strode out of the courtyard behind her, approaching Jonathan.“Hello Lilly,” he greeted me with a wide smile.“Welcome,” I smiled back. “How was your trip? You must be tired.”“Trip was good but long,” he replied. “Quite a hideout you have here.”I glanced over to Sienna and Kai who looked like two lovebirds in heaven. Young love had never looked so naive and romantic. Geez, I wasn’t quite sure whether I was ready for this.Ready or not, it’s coming.Jonathan’s chuckle pulled me back. “Makes me kind of feel old,” he commented.“Agreed,” I muttered. I hoped my daughter’s love story would go better than my own. And make it platonic, I added mentally. “I’m not ready for my daughter to seriously date,” I countered.“I understand that completely,” he replied. Silence followed, lingering t
CHANCE - THREE YEARS LATERThe moment my driver passed through the gate, I couldn’t help the smile curving my lips. The immaculate lawn wasn’t so immaculate anymore. The quiet estate wasn’t so quiet anymore. The home wasn’t a lonely place to lay my head.Lilly and my home boomed with laughter, loud voices, occasional tears and arguments, but it was all worth it. I wouldn’t trade it for anything.“Seems the kids had a good day, sir,” my driver remarked.He was right. If the driveway marked with chalk full of colors, bikes, and a kiddie pool were anything to go by. I still didn’t understand the need for a kiddie pool when we had a perfectly functioning real pool, but Lilly insisted it was better.So we went with it. She dragged me to Target and picked out the cheapest pool she could find. I’d do anything to keep her happy. If she wanted me to drain the Olympic size pool, so be it. As long as she continued smiling.The car came to a stop, and I grinned. Lilly sat at the doorstep of our m
SIX WEEKS LATER“Stop fidgeting,” Noona complained. “You are messing up your hair.”“Forget my hair,” I retorted with a wide smile. God, I was so happy I could burst. “It’ll get messed up anyway. Chance gets a bit rough in the bedroom. We’re trying out some kinky stuff after the ceremony.”I winked, a playful smile on my lips.“Jesus, why would you tell me that?” Noona giggled. “What happened to my reserved best friend?”I shrugged my shoulders, glancing at the woman staring back at me in the mirror. My brown hair fell in thick waves down my back, sunlight coming through the yacht window highlighting the warm tones in it. My whiskey brown eyes sparkled and reflected back at me with a happy gleam. Slight makeup accented my eyes, lips, and cheekbones. My beach tan was enough. It contrasted against my simple, white, strapless baby doll wedding dress that came to my knees and matching two inch heels. My baby bump was getting bigger by the day.I couldn’t believe I was getting married. To
LillyBright light streaming through the window woke me, and I slowly opened my eyes, blinded by it. I hadn’t felt this relaxed in weeks, and I smiled to myself. I went to move and felt strong arms wrapped around me. I remembered last night.Too much emotion burned.I swallowed and turned to see Chance’s handsome face. My heart swelled at the sight. I brushed my fingers over his dark hair, the words from last night dancing through the air. I loved him. My body nor my mind would ever want anyone else. He was it for me.My eyes roamed the space. We ended up in my bedroom last night.He said he loves me. My pulse fluttered remembering his words.I slowly shifted out of his arms, ensuring I didn't wake him. I got up and tiptoed around the room grabbing my clothes out of the closet, as quietly as I could, and went into the bathroom to pee. As I shut the bathroom door behind me, I exhaled and leaned against it. My reflection stared back at me, the mirror reflecting a dreamy smile and thorou
ChanceMy woman.Fucking mine.I watched her sleep, her naked body a sight to behold. I’d never tire of watching her. Not in five years. Not in twenty. I’d grow old with her. Love her. Worship her.I fucking loved her so goddamn much that just the thought of losing her brought me to my knees.Tucking her body into me, I skimmed my lips against her temple. A small sigh left her lips but she didn’t stir. Jonathan said she tired easier.It turned out my best friend sleeping with my ex-wife was the best goddamn thing that could have happened to me. Our differences were settled, although I still refused to trust him.But I trusted Lilly.“You’re in my blood, beating in my heart. You’re my life,” I whispered against her temple. “My everything. Life without you would just be existing. I love you. In this life and the next.”Her dark eyes fluttered open and our gazes connected. Confusion and exhaustion lingered in hers.“Did I wake you?” I asked.A breath of silence.“I wanted to make sure yo
LillyTonight’s dinner. At my favorite restaurant. With people I loved.I loved him. He was part of me, just as my girls were.Chance’s words playing in my mind. Over and over and over again. Marry me. Just like that? God help me, I wanted to, but I wanted his love even more.“Look, Mommy... we are beautiful!” Saoirse exclaimed, pulling me away from my thoughts. I caught her watching herself in the mirror, not an ounce of modesty on her face.“Girls, you’re going to turn vain if you continue looking at yourself in the mirror.” Then because I couldn’t resist, I smiled. “And yes, you look beautiful.”My little ones whirled around one more time.“Ok, lovebugs,” I murmured while hugging them. “Go play.”I smiled as they disappeared and I went to get myself ready. A quick shower, even quicker blow-dry, some mascara, and I was ready. My hair had gotten longer and even thicker with my prenatal vitamins. I couldn’t help but smile as I looked at my image in the mirror, the move reminding me of
LillyThe next morning, we found ourselves on the beach early.Chance and Sophie eventually joined too. It was the downfall of a small village. It took all of ten minutes to reach all four corners of the entire village.“Hi, Mommy.” Sierra ran towards me with her chubby hands outstretched. “Mr. Paolo gave me an extra scoop.”I missed the days when the world revolved around ice cream.“Me too,” Saoirse exclaimed.“Free scoops are always the best.”“So this is where you’ve been hiding?” Chance sat next to me. Saoirse and Sierra left to play with their cousins to build yet another stone castle in the water.I glanced down to my bathing suit and regretted not wearing a one piece. The two piece white bathing suit revealed my little bump and next to Sophie’s knockout body, I felt a bit self-conscious. Although I had the best reason for it.“Hi there,” she greeted me. “I hope you don’t mind that we joined in.”“Of course not,” Jonathan replied before I could. He had eyes only for Sophie.Int
LillyI rushed out of there like the devil was at my heel.Rick trailed behind me. “I don’t know how I’ll survive seeing him every day,” I whispered as I glanced over my shoulder.Chance’s intense gaze remained on me, the heat of it burning through me with promises of passionate nights, rustle of the sheets and filthy words against my skin.I shook my head, hoping to clear the images creeping up my mind. “I should have said a million per night, per room.”“He would have paid it,” Rick declared confidently. “Maybe it’s good that he is here. You can decide if you want to go after him.”I glared at him. “Did he look alone to you? Did you not notice that seriously gorgeous redhead next to him?”“I did.” He shrugged casually, tucking his hands into his pockets. “But I also noticed he wasn’t looking at her. His eyes were on you the entire time.”“That’s because he wants to talk about the pregnancy. When that man gets something in his head, he doesn’t let go. I’ve seen him in negotiations.”
Lilly“Kristoff,” I breathed. “What a surprise to see you here.” Lie.Ever since the gifts, I knew deep down he was coming. Nothing and nobody would keep that man away when he set his mind on something.“No matter where you go, I’ll find you.” The deep sound of his voice did things to me I had no business feeling. Then the words sunk in. Unhealthy, my reason whispered.A loud, delighted screech and the moment evaporated through the summer breeze. Saoirse ran through the terrace. Chance knelt down before she threw herself through the air into his arms. Sierra followed, her eyes shining like the sea under the bright sun and the biggest smile her little face could muster.My heart stilled, the image burning right into my soul.Family. God, this felt like family.Our eyes collided, my heart slowed and the world ceased to exist. Just Chance and our kids. No, no, no, my kids.It was only then I noticed the woman beside him. A gorgeous redhead, wearing a classy white Greek summer dress with
LillyWe danced in silence until the song ended when Rick stepped in.“Can I cut in?”“You already have,” Jonathan grumbled.I just chuckled and took Rick’s hand just as Daughtry’s song “September” came on. “Not exactly a dance song.”“That’s ok,” he told me, putting his arms around me. “We can just slow dance.”Our bodies in sync, we danced slowly, just as we did back in our college years. So much has changed. Almost two decades, time wasted on my late husband. Catch twenty-two though, because if I regretted those years, I wouldn’t have my daughters.Opting not to think about Jack, I focused on the words of the song. And damn if that wasn’t just as bad. The words tore at my chest and fragile heart. Since songs never made me tear up before, I mused. This self-revelation would be the death of me.An ache bloomed in my chest, remembering moments with Chance, like snapshots for perfect moments. Damn hormones. Tears burned the backs of my eyes, the ache traveling through my veins to my he