“PAINFUL PAST”

“I don't like that baby Cecille! She is a plague! She is a plague in my life! Don't bring her near me!” Alice's hysterical cry to her older sister Cecille echoed through the room.

Cecille's eyes warmed even as the intense anger she felt for her younger sister consumed her.

“And what is your daughter's fault in all this? It’s not her fault that the man who got you pregnant ran away!” Cecille retorted, her voice carrying a furious tone directed at her youngest sister.

A week had passed since Alice gave birth, yet she hadn't touched the baby.

And that hurt Cecille deeply.

But she couldn't force Alice to accept her own child; her sister's rebellious nature was a barrier.

"I don't care! If it weren't for her, I would be in Japan today, already making a lot of money. I could have bought what I wanted! Unlike now, I don't have any money in my purse! I even have a problem with her diaper and milk!” Alice replied without changing her tone.

Cecille let out a heavy sigh and then bowed to the baby lying on the wooden bed.

She couldn't fathom why people like her sister could dislike their own child as if they were broken toys.

After all, the child was innocent and bore no responsibility for her parents' actions. In fact, the child was the real victim.

"I'm leaving now. Take the baby; she's all yours. Do whatever you want with her. Find someone who can adopt her. It is enough that I did not abort her and let her live, but I'm not ready to be a mother to her yet," Alice's words snapped Cecille out of her thoughts.

Cecille's anger intensified. She turned to Alice, who was already carrying a traveling bag containing her personal belongings.

"No problem. If that's what you want, I won't stop you. I only want one thing,” Cecille said, tears welling in her eyes.

Alice raised a skeptical eyebrow. "What's that?"

“Don't ever show yourself to me again,” she replied firmly and furiously.

Alice just smirked at her as she raised an eyebrow. "You don't have to tell me that," that's all, and she left the room.

Cecille could hear the loud noise as Alice slammed the door. It was at that moment when she could no longer hold back her tears. She compassionately picked up the beautiful baby, who was still sound asleep.

She kissed her cheek then hugged her tightly. "From now on, I will be your mother, Lana, sweetheart," she said, caressing her small and perfect nose.

**Ten Years Later…**

“I am the only family she's got left; I can't leave her. Her mother already did that to her, and now you want me to abandon her?” Lana was stunned, reading her English textbook when she heard that high tone voice of her Mama Cecille.

“Why don't you look for her mother? She is the one responsible for that child, not you! ” replied her Uncle Gary, her Mama Cecille's boyfriend.

"You know Gary, if you can't accept my niece, maybe it's better for us to end this," Cecille said in a firm voice.

From the moment she peeked at the door, Lana could clearly see the shock on Gary's face.

"You would leave me for that child?" Gary asked in a tone of coldness and disbelief as he recovered from the shock.

“I love Lana like my own child. That child is my own blood and flesh, so if you can't accept her, I'm sorry,” then Cecille acted as she approached and then opened the door. "You can go now," she shooed Gary away.

"You'll regret what you did, Cecilia," said Gary in a tone full of intense resentment for her aunt.

Her Mama Cecille shook her head. "I will never regret choosing my niece," she said in her usual calm tone.

When Gary came out, her aunt quickly pushed the door shut.

Then sat in the living room set made of bamboo and cried. At first, Lana hesitated to go out to approach her aunt. But she couldn't stand it either.

"M-Mama," she said touching her aunt's shoulder.

From her face being sunk into her own palms, Cecille quickly wiped away her tears and then smiled at her. "What's that, sweetie?"

Lana did not speak. She just hugged the person she has known since childhood as her mother. Even to say she has always been aware of the true story of her life.

“Promise Mama I will study hard so that you won't have any difficulty sewing. I will be kind and help you with the house chores,” she said, stroking the hair of her aunt who is now crying.

Moments later, her aunt looked up at her and sat her on her lap.

“I know you’re worried. I will not leave you, no matter what happens. In my heart, you are my child and I am your mother. And a mother does not and never leaves her child,” she promised her.

Lana no longer spoke.

She believed what her Mama Cecille had said.

And in her heart, the promise she made is true. The time will come, she will give her Mama Cecille a beautiful and abundant life. They will not be poor for life.

**Eleven Years Later…**

“Oh, there you are. I cooked a snack; it's on the table, just eat,” said her aunt who was busy sewing a school uniform.

Smiling, Lana looked at her aunt who has always been supporting her.

Just over a week after she was born, her mother left her and never came back.

"I have good news for you, Mama," she said standing up then continued to the kitchen. Lana returned carrying a bowl of cassava in coconut cream.

From being bent over to the sewing machine, her acclaimed mother faced her.

"What's that?" her Mama Cecille asks.

A sweet smile tore from Lana's lips. "I have a job!" in a cheerful tone.

Cecille's face brightened at what she said. “Oh, that's good. Where is it, by the way? ” she turned her attention back to the clothes being sewn so the machine made a noise again.

"Mercedes Estate, it's a big company of houses and condos," she replied. "So don't take too many orders because you don't have to work hard. I'll work for the two of us from now on," she added with a smile.

Cecille laughed at her first before she spoke. “And what do you want me to do? Nothing? That would be hard; I would be paralyzed if I didn’t move. The good thing that you should do with your money is to save them, and then, get married.”

At the last thing her aunt said, Lana couldn't help but laugh. “Find a husband right away? I don't even have a boyfriend,” she replied as she finished the food from the bowl she was holding.

Her Mama Cecille shrugged. "It's been a long time since Richard; haven't you moved on with him yet?"

At the name she heard, Lana quickly felt the pain draw in her chest. "He's my first love, Mama," she answered almost in a whisper.

That was when Cecille took off the glasses

 she was wearing. “Lana, you were only eighteen then. You are now twenty-one and soon will be a career woman. Why can't you forget him?”

Lana didn't answer, so her aunt continued sewing.

"Gary was my first love also, but because I focused my attention on loving you I didn't find it hard to forget him," she said glancing at her afterward.

"Look, I will tell you if I like Karen; the only problem is, I don't, so please stop being suspicious!"

When she remembered what Richard had said to her, Lana smiled bitterly.

That was when she confronted Richard after hearing from someone who had seen him and Karen entered the cinema together.

A month after that argument with Richard, the man left her and admitted to her that everything was true and even her suspicions. That literally something had been going on for a long time with him and with that woman she was jealous of.

"I loved him so much, Mama, yet he replaced me with another woman," she said in a sad tone.

"I know, that's what you always say," replied her aunt then sighed. "Admit it to me, Lana, did something happen to you and Richard?"

Lana was surprised by her aunt's straightforward question. “Oh no, Mama! Nothing!” she said with a series of shakes of her head. "I think that's the reason why he was not satisfied with me. Because I don't want anything to happen to us,” she replied sadly.

Her aunt nodded. “That's better because nowadays many men are looking for that. Unlike in our time, that virginity is important. ”

"I don't want to be like my mother; that's what I really avoid," she said telling the truth and then stood up to turn on the TV. "Maybe you forgot your favorite TV series in the afternoon. There, perfect timing,” she said with a smile as she saw a perfect face on the screen. “Andrew Scott is really handsome, right Mama? I really admire him,” Lana's mood changed quickly when she saw her favorite actor.

“Well, he is obviously and really very handsome; he is also good at acting. But I just can't help but doubt him. He has been famous for a long time, but why doesn't he have a girlfriend? ” her aunt's meaningful words that she knew for a fact were obviously to tease her.

Lana's immediately pouted her lips at what she heard. "Hey Mama, Andrew isn't gay; maybe he's really not attracted to those he works with, or maybe it's because we haven't met, so he hasn't fallen in love yet!" at her last words Lana couldn't help but shudder.           

Mama Cecille laughed softly at what she said. “That is exactly the reason that I see why you are having a hard time seeing the good qualities of your suitors. You're so obsessed with that actor,” she said, following her words with an amused laugh.

When her aunt said that Lana's excitement intensified even more. “Oh my gosh Mama, I have a strong feeling that we were really meant to be. Honestly, even though I haven't seen him personally, I feel that the day will come when we will meet in the most romantic way! ”

“Anyway, he is handsome, and you are beautiful. You two would be a perfect match, and if you will end up together, your baby would surely be handsome or definitely be beautiful!”

They laughed out loud and at the same time at what her aunt said. "That's why I love you so much Mama; you have always been my best and number one supporter," that was true inside her.

Her aunt didn't answer; she just smiled and stared at her.

While in Lana's mind, maybe what Mama Cecille was saying to her was true. She doesn't pay attention to her many suitors because of her attraction to Andrew Scott.

Mama Cecille loves watching dramas and TV series.

And that's when she first saw Andrew's handsomeness on television.

At that time, the young man was just starting in show business. But because he was handsome and good at acting, the young man rose quickly. And she’s already one of the many to follow the man’s career.

She doesn’t regularly watch Andrew’s movies because she doesn’t have the budget for that. But now that will be having a job, she knew she could finally do it with Mama Cecille.

Andrew Scott is half-British and half-Filipino. He grew up in London in the United Kingdom and decided to return to the Philippines with his sister Samantha, who, as far as she knows, is now studying Culinary at a large and famous school here in Manila.

Andrew's grandmother was a well-known actress during her youth. That paved the way for the young man so many in the show business became interested in him. She read about those pieces of information and some are from Andrew's own interviews.

Well, at least in the world of being a simple fangirl, there are no rejections, no heartaches. Pure romantic excitements, pure love. That even if they say she can only be with Andrew in her dreams and only there will she be able to hug and kiss him, she is very much contented and happy.