I cough again to clear my throat and gently grasp Elliot's lingering hand.This can't be happening."Likewise," I force the word out, giving him a weak smile. "Right, should we get started?" Julia claps her hands together, the sound causes my rigid rigid body to flinch. "Kristine has set out some of our files in front of your seats." She motions to the conference table. Brian sits down opposite Julia; Elliot placed directly across from me. I force myself into my chair, not taking my eyes off of him. I feel my face flush with warmth before settling in my cheeks and I take in short silent breaths. Elliot and Brian remove items from their bags, placing computers down on the table beside their notepads and pens. I watch Elliot's movements, as if it's all happening in slow motion. He's in a navy suit, his muscular arms defined through the sleeves. Under the suit jacket, he's wearing a white collared shirt and patterned tie. Elliot's brown hair is casually slicked along the sides of his
I use the spare key and let myself into Kate's apartment, sliding a bottle of wine into the refrigerator. I take off my shoes and blazer, drop my purse on the living room floor, and throw myself onto her couch. I hold one of the throw pillows to my face and let out a scream. After releasing my frustrations, I lay on my side, pull my knees up to my chest, and mindlessly look around Kate's studio apartment. Though small, the room is surprisingly spacious. A large TV is mounted on the faded brick wall, surrounded by pictures of us as children and up through our college graduation. Her full size bed is nestled in the back corner and I have half a mind to crawl into it and fall asleep, though I doubt my racing mind would let me. I dig my phone out of the pocket of my blazer and I notice a missed call from my mom. I unlock the screen and dial her number."Hey, Kris." My mother's cheery voice greets me after the second ring. "Hi Mom, I saw you called. What's going on?" I sigh, rubbing my
"Kris!" My mom exits the house and greets me at Kate's car, which she had so graciously let me borrow for the weekend. Mom throws her arms around me and squeezes my body against her small frame. She stands a few inches shorter than me and her grayed, blonde hair tickles my nose. "Hi mom.," I say, giving her a one armed hug. She pulls away and her brown eyes meet mine, she places a manicured hand on my cheek. "I've missed you," she says. I close the car door and stretch, straightening out my sundress and adjusting my jean jacket. I grab my pink overnight bag from the backseat and follow mom up the bricked front steps into the house. My dad is sitting at the table in the small 80's style kitchen, enjoying a cup of coffee while and reading. I throw my bag into my old bedroom and return to the kitchen, giving my dad a quick peck on the cheek. He looks up at me, his gray eyes peeking over the rim of his glasses that are perched at the tip of his nose. His brown hair is brushed across t
After an exhausting drive back into the city, I immediately set my sights on my bed. I throw myself down onto it, landing onto my pillows and melting into them. I take a deep breath and hold a pillow over my face. I scream into it until my throat is sore and toss it aside. That was enough family time to tide me over until Anna's wedding next month. I've already decided I will not speak to or see them until then. I force myself off of the mattress and change into something more comfortable than the t-shirt and jeans I had traveled in., I settle on a pair of athletic shorts and my favorite off the shoulder, black sweater. Elliot: I've picked up dinner, I'll be over soon for our '"casual'" evening. Kris: Sounds good! See you soon. Elliot: Are you sure there's no sex until after you're done with the case? Kris: Yes... I lay down on the couch and turn on the TV, not even paying attention to what's on, I just need something to fill the silence. I scroll through my phone and check my sc
Monday and Tuesday fly by in a blur. Between my workload and Julia's, I've barely had a chance to process the fact that our last meeting with Elliot and Brian is today. Julia places a cup of coffee and chocolate donut in front of me. My stomach grumbles at the sight of it. "Oh, you know me too well." I eagerly unwrap the pastry and take a bite. "I'm sorry I was out of the office the last two days.," Julia apologizes. "I know it must've made things challenging for you." I give Julia a blank stare. "Knock it off. You know I don't mind." "Yeah but-" I pick up my donut and coffee and exit my office, actively avoiding her apologies. "I can't hear you!" I tease Julia, making my way down the hallway to the conference room. She attempts to match my pace, entering the room behind me. I seat myself at the end of the table, placing my cup and donut beside my notebook. Julia calls the receptionist and asks them to send Brian and Elliot to the conference room when they arrive. She and I rec
"You've been seeing this guy nearly every day for over a month, Kris. Are you sure there isn't something more happening there?" Kate asks as she tears a comb through my hair. I sit in a chair facing the mirror as she navigates how to style it. She peers over my shoulder looking at the image Anna had sent, detailing the specific hairstyle she requested all members of the bridal party have done for the wedding day. "Honestly, Kate. I-I don't think there is. We both agreed this was something casual, neither of us are looking for anything serious. It's simply just fun." Kate stops mid-brush and meets my eyes in the reflection of the mirror. "You're so full of shit." She scoffs. "But, back to the question at hand, am I joining you for the wedding this weekend or is he? Because, obviously, you've got some options right now." I push my elbow behind me, playfully nudging her. She laughs and jumps back. "I do think though that if I bring you to any more family events, they'll all be convi
"You met through work then?" Aunt Lisa asks Elliot. My family approaches the end of their dinner, wine glasses nearly empty, and plates picked clean. I push a stray piece of chicken around on my plate with the tip of my fork, wanting to avoid eye contact with my mother whose gaze I can still feel burning into me. Anna has joined us and is seated on Elliot's other side.He nods and sets his drink down on the white tablecloth. "Kristine was assisting on one of my legal cases, very thoroughly might I add, and, well, here we are." He rests his arm on the back of my chair, his fingers gently rub my back, tracing in circles."We obviously waited until after I was finished with the case.," I interject, dropping the fork onto the plate. I cringe as it clatters against the ceramic. "It-–it wouldn't have been right otherwise. You know, boundaries." "Oh yes, Kristine insisted on being professional about it." He laughs. "I'm so glad you're able to join us." Anna smiles at him. "Had I known you
I watch as Anna walks back down the aisle at the end of the ceremony. She floats hand in hand with her husband, the train of her shimmering white dress trailing behind her, and flower petals flattening beneath their feet. Ben leans over to place a kiss on her cheek as they exit the venue., the guests cheer and cry, overflowing with joy for the happy couple. Myself, the bridesmaids, and groomsmen dance down the aisle as we follow them out of the building. Elliot catches my eye as I pass his row. He sits comfortably beside my parents, my mom chattering excitedly to him and my father. He doesn't seem to be paying any attention to mother's words, as he is too busy undressing me with his eyes. Elliot realizes that I've noticed and winks at me, a smile extending across his face. The butterflies in my stomach return full force, catching me off guard. How does he do that? The rest of the wedding guests trickle out into the garden as the catering staff transitions the room into a dining spac
"Do you still think about him?" Anna asks quietly, stroking the hand of the small blanketed bundle in my arms. I nod, meeting her eyes. "I do. Every day," I sigh. "I really thought I'd be able to build a life with him. Get married, have kids..." I look back down. "...have something like you and Ben do." Anna chuckles softly. "Be glad you can wait a little longer on the having kids part." She takes the baby from my arms and lays him in his crib. "Leo has quite the personality of his own already," she says, admiring her son. Motherhood suits her. I've never seen Anna glow the way she does when she looks at her child. I take one last look at Leo, my godchild, sleeping soundly before following Anna back out into the living room. I sit down on the couch across the room from her, folding my legs beneath me and hug a pillow to my chest. Their home has finally come together, the last touches being Leo's nursery. The living room and kitchen are now an open floor concept after my destruction
I brush my thumb along Elliot's jaw line, feeling the soft stubble on his chin against the pad of my finger. He sleeps soundly, softly snoring, his naked body barely covered by my bed sheet. I love you... I rest my head on my arm and clench my eyes shut. My mind races and my body aches. I think back to a year ago, when Elliot and I had first met in that loud, sweaty club. When he had taken me home and reawakened my body that night. When his company and his touch made me crave him more and more each day. And now... I loved every minute of what happened earlier in the evening, feeling like we were one again, like there was nothing wrong. And yet, nothing was the same. We've changed. I've changed. Three months ago, I left him. Everything we built together had come to an abrupt end. I love him. But I can't forget what he'd done. And yet, after I left him, he sat by my side for days on end until I woke up in the hospital. He loves me, endlessly, unconditionally which is a love I've ne
"Three more!" Kate cheers. I groan, sweat drips down my forehead, my muscles beg for me to stop. One, two, three. I let out a deep breath and collapse onto the floor, lying flat on my back. "Careful of your head!" Kate gasps. I shoot her an annoyed look. "I'm fine. It's been three months, Kate." "Okay if you're so fine, get off the floor by yourself." Kate stands back and crosses her arms over her chest, looking at me skeptically. Fuck. Come on, Kristine. Get up. I sit up and ease myself onto my knees, I push myself off of the floor using extra support from my hands. I wince as I stand up straight and I breathe hard as I place my hands on my hips. "Ha. Did it." I stick my nose up in the air. "I wish I could have gotten a video of that, you looked ridiculous," Kate snorts. I playfully punch her arm. "Get out of here, go home," I laugh. "Happily." She sticks her tongue out at me. "But first—" Kate steps toward me and checks my eyes and my heart rate, before taking a quick lo
"Welcome back!" My co-worker's voices echo through the office, catching me off guard and causing me to stumble backwards. My hands fly to my mouth in surprise. Bouquets of fresh flowers, cards, and treats overflow on my desk. I smile and drop my bag onto the floor, picking up some of the cards and looking through them. "Guys, this is too much. You didn't need to do this," I say, teary eyed. Julia wraps one arm around me. "We wanted you to know we missed you and we're happy that you're back. The last two months without you have been too quiet." I brush the tears from my cheek with the back of my hand. "Thank you everyone." After receiving gentle hugs from each of my co-workers, I close my office door and ease myself down into my chair. My body is still sore, my movements are slow and rigid. I take a deep breath and rest my head against the back of the chair. The day has barely even started and I'm already exhausted. I open my laptop and turn it on, the screen coming to life for the
I peel my eyes open and look around the dull, white hospital room. The lights are harsh and I find myself squinting because of them. The sanitized smell of the atmosphere burns my nose. Elliot is asleep in a chair at the foot of the bed, his head rests on his arms which are folded on top of the mattress. The beeping of multiple machines reverberate in my ears. I examine the wires attached to my body. An IV in my hand, pulse oximeter clip on my index finger. EKG chords attached to my chest and a thin oxygen tube positioned beneath my nose. I brush the tips of my fingers against the oxygen tube and wiggle the finger with the pulse oximeter attached. "Kristine? Honey?" Mom whispers as she leans forward in her chair. I slowly turn my head to look at her and the corner of my mouth pulls into a pained smile. I try to speak but nothing comes out. "Don't talk, you've had a tube in your throat. You're going to be sore for a little while." I nod. I drop my hand from the oxygen tube and plac
"The surgery was successful. Bleeding is under control, it doesn't look like there will be any long lasting damage. Recovery from wounds like this could take time, but she was very fortunate." "Thank you, thank you very much doctor," my mother says through muffled sobs. I hear footsteps retreating and the click of a door closing. Mom sits down beside me and runs her fingers through my hair. "Did you hear that, baby? You're going to be okay." **** "Elliot, go home and get some rest," Mom says softly. "You need to clean yourself up." "I can't. I can't leave yet." Elliot's voice is strained and hoarse. "Honey..." My mom's voice cracks. "You still have her...her blood all over you. Please. Go home, shower, change, there will still be a place here for you when you get back." "My shirt... I–I didn't even realize..." **** "Three stab wounds to the abdomen. Two broken ribs. Concussion and minor brain bleed as a result of a skull fracture?" Kate lists off. "Her neck and face are cove
"No, please." I try to fight him off. "Mr. Harris—" "Shut up," he hisses in my ear. A slight whimper escapes my lips. He turns around and hits the emergency stop button on the elevator panel. "You've ruined everything for me. I've lost it all. My home, my wife, my kids, my job. It's all gone and it's all because of you," "Doing this... Won't help your case..." I spit. I ball my hand into a fist lift my arm, attempting to hit him. He wraps his meaty hand around my wrist and pins it against the elevator wall. "Probably not, but it sure does make me feel better." He removes his forearm from my throat, replacing it with his hand. I take in a quick breath before I feel his thumb and fingers press against my airway. "I haven't got anything else to lose." I've reached my limit. My sadness, my disappointment, my anger, spills over all at once. I haven't got anything else to lose. "You fucking did this to yourself," I force the words past my lips, I'm finding it harder to breathe. "What
A recess is called and I'm ushered out of the courtroom, Brian and Elliot escort me back to the conference room where Julia is waiting. Julia rises from her seat as we enter the small room and I quickly put distance between myself and Elliot. "They seem satisfied with what you've said, Kristine. I believe you and Julia can leave,." Brian tells us. "Thank you," I say as I quickly throw my bag over my shoulder. "Good luck, gentlemen," Julia says as she recollects her papers. We hurriedly exit the room, leaving Brian and Elliot behind. "Kristine!" Elliot calls after me in a hushed tone. "Wait a minute!" I stop walking, close my eyes and inhale. I flex my fingers before clenching them together, my nails digs into my palms, the sensation grounding my emotions. "We can keep going, Kris. We're done here." Julia grabs my arm, gently pulling. I shake my head. "I'll meet you at the car in a few minutes," I tell her. "He's going to keep trying. I need to just hear what he has to say." Sh
"Shit!" I hear Kate mutter, followed by a soft thud. "Dammit.""Are you okay?" I call from the bathroom. "Have I ever told you that you own a lot of shit?" She groans. I stifle a laugh,. "Yeah, once or twice." While I had been with my parents, Kate managed to recollect all of my belongings from Elliot's apartment. He had been there while she was repacking some of the boxes, but wouldn't tell me much more than that. Part of me wanted to know how he was doing, the other part of me wanted him to not exist. "I have another apartment showing scheduled tomorrow, you'll only have to deal with me for a little longer." I've been sleeping on Kate's couch for nearly two weeks now, and today is my first day back in the office after taking some personal time to recollect myself. While I'm not whole, I'm at least functional. "You know you can stay here as long as you want,." Kate tells me, leaning against the bathroom door. "Maybe I'll just move into the storage unit with the rest of my thin