Words From The Heart 

Chapter 7

Sansa's Pov

Letters

'Love, it's been a while since I've thought about you recently, it's been years since I've seen you, but your gorgeous face is still stuck in my head. I still visit the locations where we used to spend our greatest moments together.

Walking down the beach with your hand in mine, while we were both lost in each other's eyes as deep as the ocean, your lovely smile made me feel alive. Those were the days I longed for. Back when you were mine.

My life has changed since the day I met you; you were the best thing that ever happened to me; no borders, no restrictions, nothing could keep us apart.

I believed I was strong enough to let you go, that I could live my life without you, but I was mistaken; I had no clue how wretched I would be without you.

Your fragrance is still present. I can smell you in our bedroom, and your old outfits are still hanging in the closet, giving me the impression that you are still here.

I haven't touched or changed anything in our bedroom, and the same white thin curtain blows out the window in the winter. The creaking sound of the window reminds me of how you used to react to noises in a lovely manner.

The red rose was printed on a yellow lamp on the side table that was broken and you instructed me to throw it away, but I kept it since I remembered you buying it for our bedroom to brighten it up, and it was your favorite lamp. You have brightened my life since you met me.

The same warm cozy atmosphere of our room never gets old; I love to remember how things were with you; the guitar that I used to play and sing songs for you is still hanging on the wall near our wedding photo painting that our daughter created for us on her 9th birthday.

Everything remains the same, except you. The loneliness I feel every night on the right side of my bed when I turn and can't see you there when I turn my face to look at you as I used to, thinking you'd smile back and hold my hand in your soft palms and stare at me for a long time,

I love to lose in your deep ocean eyes when all I have to do is look at you and forget about the rest of the world.

I miss your touch on my face, getting closer than ever before, holding me near enough to hear my thoughts, the aroma of your creamy skin, and your silky hair seemed like a sea under the moonlight.

The darkness I see was wonderful with my eyes closed when your lips sealed in mine and I could feel them. The pleasure I used to have with you was on another level, the melody I used to hear in your voice, the happiness I used to feel in your touch had all vanished.

You're not here, and the sorrow I feel is enormous; I still couldn't believe it after all these years that I'd lost you so long ago; what hope was I clinging on to?

I couldn't believe it when I was the one who closed your unmoving eyes with my quivering hands and a heavy heart as your soul left your body; I believe genuine love is always intended to be this way.

It felt strange to have to celebrate happiness and mourn my greatest loss on the same day, the day we were separated. It was the most distressing recollection I had.

My heart was unmoved by anything in the world, and I never fell in love again; you were the first and last person I ever loved.

I had to pretend to be cheerful and enthusiastic when my heart was crying for you and I felt your absence every second.

I don't want to show how depressed I am without you, but I have to act like I am the happiest person in the world in front of our daughter.

I can't change the fact that she was born and you were gone, the same day I lost you forever, I never wanted to tell her that I tried hard to hate her but I couldn't, she is innocent and the best gift you ever gave me, I realized it by the time, she is the example of our pure love for which we fought to the end.

Our princess, Sansa, the name you gave her. She is interested in you and the good memories I told her but kept the cruelest within me.

I love you, Lucinda Hansley, and I miss you. I will always love you,

Your Raven Elsher.'

Some of the letters my father wrote to my mother were discovered locked inside a box hidden inside his closet on the day of my father's funeral, my birthday, February 14th. My mother died the day after giving birth to me. When I lost my father on February 14th, it became a cursed day for me.

How I became the curse in his life destroyed my heart. He never made me feel like my birth was his worst memory, even though he was probably in pain at the time.

I questioned how he restrained his wrath and hatred towards me after I murdered the most important person to him by coming into this world and causing my mother to lose her life.

The shame I felt after reading the letters, his thoughts, and the words he wanted to tell my mother but couldn't since he was suffering all the while I was at his side but I never knew.

He never told me that my mother died on my birthday, he never mentioned the date, and he always avoided talking about my mother.

I used to think he avoided and disliked my mother until I discovered his letters in which he penned his sentiments and the things he wanted to tell her. He kept his letters buried inside the box, trapped inside.

No matter how much we love someone, we will have to say goodbye to them one day; love is a scary thing that we do not select but fall into by accident.

That's what I used to be frightened of; falling in love was difficult for me because I put walls around my heart, making it hard for anyone to enter or breakthrough.

I'd never wanted to be close to anybody before, but Logan changed my mind. I fell in love with the man who was willing to give up his pack, his status as a beta, and his entire life to be with a half-human, half-werewolf like me.

I was nothing more than a survivor, who spent her adolescent years in fear, on different streets, without shelter, and protecting herself from demons, devilish men who wanted to harm me in any way possible after my grandpa Falkor kicked me out of the house in the middle of the night on the day my father died.

Being in love with Logan made me feel comfortable for the first time in my life; he was a shelter in the rain and a relief in the suffering; he was a lovely reality when I used to wake up from my nightmares; those nightmares had vanished after I met Logan.

He was sweet, kind, and the most attractive man I'd ever encountered. He was brave enough to protect me from every threat; he demonstrated his love for me; he won my heart and made me his forever.

I last saw him at our wedding hall when our ceremony was disrupted by Xavier, and I had to sacrifice myself to save Logan, who would blame me for leaving him.

No matter how far we were apart, he was always in my heart and mind, which Xavier despised the most; he wanted me to forget the man I loved, but it was impossible for me to forget the one who made me feel love for the first time and convinced me that I deserved to be loved and to be happy.

"NO!!!!" The woman's cry was audible, and her voice rang through the jungle in the cold night, alerting birds, animals, and creatures to the loss of a loved one.

Xavier and Samuel's attention was drawn to a pregnant woman seated next to Father Raven, who was not responding as she yelled and screamed his name and demanded that he wake up.

"You can't just leave me like that!!" The woman was crying more, losing control, which was bad for her and the baby she was carrying.

The enigma engulfed me once more: if my father died like the way in the past, how did he live and care for me? He stayed with me till I was 14, I was at his burial, still trying to figure out whether he died right in front of me in the forest or if it was simply a dream.

Who was that woman, when my father was only in love with my mother?

Was that even correct? Or was the reality I was living a lie?