2

Arabella Rivera

 

For an entire hour, I had occupied myself by rearranging the books on my desk over and over. It was not like I had a tendency to be an organized freak.

 

It was just that, the thought of leaving high school in a few more months made me a little antsy. Okay, a lot. I was literally thinking of every possible bad scenario. One where there was a stack of books burying me or two getting a B on an exam. I wince by the very thought.

 

Letting out a breath, I stepped back a little to observe my work as I dusted off my hands. I hummed staring down at the neatly piled books stacked to the very left corner of the desk.

 

No, the history book looks too big to be at the very top.

 

A little again and it would flatten the rest of the books in a stack of flat pancakes.

 

I step forward and reach over to rearrange the books again and placed the history book at the very bottom. Stepping back again, I dusted off my hands this time with a soft smile beaming on my face as I observe my work.

 

Just then the door to my room opens softly. So grossed in my organizing I had now only realized that the sun was about to set. The golden hue of the sunset warms over my face as I turn to face the opened door. I smiled as Gertrude enters with a tray.

 

Her dark eyes fall on the books on the desk and she seems to be calculating something in her head. It was only a few minutes ago she saw them stacked on the right corner when she came to ask if I wanted her to bring me my dinner.

 

" I see you've arranged them again." She smiles tenderly and places the tray on my bedside table.

 

Gertrude had been working for my family before I was even born into this world. She practically raised me even though she was a teenager at the time. She was of Mexican descent and was now the age of thirty-seven and didn't look a day older.

 

I let out a soft awkward giggle. Gertrude knew how fidgety I got when it involved school. It was not seeing the children again that had me on edge, but it was the pressure to always top all my classes.

 

Mother and Father always said, to succeed in this world, one must always fight to remain at the top of the chain. Their words had been engraved into my mind before I had even learned to speak.

 

"They didn't look neat stacked on the right." I murmur walking over to her. It was not a lie though, from my perspective, they looked kind of off stacked on the right.

 

She smiled sadly clearly seeing straight through me. That is one thing I hated about her being with me for years, is that I could never seem to lie to her. She just sees right through it. Something father and mother never seem to care about.

 

"You'll do great Arabella, the semester hasn't even started yet and you're already so nervous. Relax." She utters and uncovers the food revealing green string beans and fully cooked steak.

My stomach pinches with hunger as the aroma goes straight to my nose.

 

I inhaled. "It's the last year of high school Gertrude. Mother and father will no doubt be tough on me. Especially since I haven't decided on which college I will apply to." I murmur, fishing for one string bean only to get my hands slapped away.

 

"That's unladylike Arabella, use a fork. Hands carry so many germs." Gertrude scowls. I rolled my eyes, retracting my hands.

 

Gertrude sighs as if exhausted. I wouldn't be surprised if she was, mother had a knack to overwork her to the point of exhaustion. "You have a lot of time to choose the college of your dreams Arabella." She reaches over and holds my cheek tenderly.

 

"You're too young and beautiful to be so stressed. Take some rest after you have your dinner." She pinches my cheek softly and smiles to reassure me.

 

Crazy how she acted more of a mother than my very own who gave birth to me.

 

I nodded to reassure her but we both knew I would not ease the weight on my shoulders. At this point, I grew accustomed to having that certain weight on my shoulders constantly reminding me that I had to prove myself in this world. That I was supposed to be the perfect girl mother and father made me believe I was.

 

But that's the thing I was far from perfect.