~Nikki~
I can’t believe how much fun I just had. I can’t remember the last time I enjoyed myself so thoroughly. I laughed and danced until I couldn’t anymore. I never actually considered what life could be like if I got away from Stuart. Now I don’t have to think about it, I can live it, and it’s good.
A warm hand touches my knee, sending butterflies to my stomach. I really need to get laid if a simple touch is enough to get me going. “Are you okay?” I nod. “We’re here.” I look around and realized that we are, indeed, back home. I swear the trip from the airport was quicker than ever before.
The car door opens for me, and a hand waits. I grab the hand, and the driver helps me out of the car. Paul follows behind me and walks me to the door. “I had so much fun this weekend. Thank you for making it a good time.” I look at Paul, his smile warming my heart.
“No, thank you. You helped me remember what fun was.” Paul leans in and kisses me on my forehead.
“I will see you later.” He turns and walks down the steps and to the left. I’m still staying in the packhouse. I considered going back to my home, but there are too many memories there, and many of them aren’t good ones. After everything died down, Paul had a house built not too far from the packhouse. It was completed while he took the time to travel. I guess the packhouse held even more memories for him than my house did for me. I walk inside and upstairs to my room, determined to get some sleep.
~Paul~
There are no words to describe the complete difference between this weekend and other past events. I was finally able to sit back and truly enjoy an event. I didn’t have to play politics or listen to the complaints about other Lunas. The difference between my ex and Nikki is monumental, not that I’m trying to compare the two.
Nikki was never someone I was able to get to know in the past. She always stayed to herself, not really dealing with many people. I would see her at the clinic, with the kids, or with Stuart. I hated that I never pushed to get to know her. I always tried to get to know all of my members personally. Maybe if I had pushed the issue, I could have spared her some of the mess she had to deal with.
I open my door and immediately catch the scent of freesia. The table by the door is filled with flowers, and I couldn’t help but smile. This has to be my daughter-in-law because my sons would never think to have the place smell good when I get back. I take another whiff of the flower before moving toward my room. I want to check out the new house, but am too tired. It can wait until the morning.
I kick my shoes off and get rid of my pants and top. I pull the covers back and slip in, placing my phone on the nightstand. I close my eyes, but my phone rings before I can drift off. I feel around for it, refusing to open my eyes. “Hello?”
“Paul…..baby?” FUCK! How the hell did she get this number? I’ve changed it several times over the past few months, and she gets it every time. “PLEASE! Don’t hang up!” I swear she was reading my mind because that’s exactly what I was about to do.
“Make it quick, Kim.”
“I……I miss you so much. I miss the kids, our family.” I swear she just won’t quit. She misses her family so much, yet built that family on a lie. It’s her lie that has everything the way it is right now, and she’s just going to have to live with that. The silence stretches between us; breathing is the only sound that can be heard.
“Is that it?”
“Paul…..Paul, please…..” I end the call and place my phone back on the nightstand. I guess I will just start blocking numbers because I’m sick of changing mine. I’ll figure it out in the morning; I need to sleep right now.
~Kimberly~
I sigh, placing the phone to my temple. I knew it would be hard to get through, but he’s giving no wiggle room. I just want my life back. I want Paul and my sons back in my life. I have to figure out how to make that happen. I toss the phone on the bed and let my body follow. These past few months have been torturous, and I just want it all to be over.
“Kim, babe? Where are you?” I roll my eyes and huff. I can’t believe that I’m stuck with him. I should have gotten rid of him when I found out he was my mate. I wouldn’t be without my men now if I had done that. I remain quiet and listen to the doorknob jiggle. His scent hits me, and I want to gag. I used to love the smell of leather and sage, but now, I can’t really stomach it.
The bed dips next to me, and sparks erupt on my back. Stuart starts to rub small circles on my back, and I feel myself relaxing completely. “How was your day? Is everything okay?” If I stay like this, I know what will happen, and I don’t want it. I sit up and reach for my phone. I sit on the edge of the bed before getting up.
“I have errands to run.” I don’t wait for a response. I just leave the room as quickly as I can. I need to get my family back and shed the dead weight.
~Stuart~
More and more, I regret holding on to Kim for so long. I had a good mate, even if she was chosen. She gave me children, and we had a good life. I had to mess it all up, trying to keep that woman by my side, even if it was at a distance.
I’m almost certain that Kim’s trying to get back in with Paul and her kids. What I don’t understand is why she hasn’t rejected me yet. If what I’m offering isn’t good enough for her, she needs to let me go. I know I could have rejected her a while ago, but I always felt that I needed to do everything I could to make it work. She’s my fated mate, and that isn’t something I’m really ready to part with at this point. If she decides that she’s done with it, there’s nothing I can do.
I’m constantly replaying everything that happened in the last few months. So much has changed so quickly that I’m just now able to sit and hash through it all. I’ve visited Aida a few times, and my heart breaks every visit. I hate seeing her so lost to the world. I’ve realized that I may have played a part in where she is now. I’ve always doted on my twins, and I think I did too much all their lives.
I’ve also been thinking about Portia all this time. She could have killed me, but she didn’t, and that says a lot. It’s been my own shortcomings that caused a rift between Portia and me. I should have been better; I should have treated Portia as my child, not the enemy. She didn’t ask to come into this world, and I’ve been treating her horribly.
I grab a beer and sit on the couch. I seem to do deep reflection many days lately. I’m constantly replaying the events in my life and reevaluating my choices. I doubt Portia will ever welcome me, but I need to figure out if my mate is worth all this trouble.
~Nikki~I bounce in the bed, making me wonder if I’m back on the plane. The journey to the wedding was bumpy at best. “MOM!” I feel an arm around me, and the comfort is wonderful. I pop an eye open and look at my daughter. She’s so beautiful; love and happiness agree with her.I owe her so much in the way of an apology. I feel I could have done more to stand up for her, but I was scared. Stuart could always be a more than opposing figure and could be abusive if he deemed it necessary. I let my fear take over, and that caused me to not be there for my daughter like I should have been.I trail my eyes down my daughter’s body until I see the baby bump. My eyes start to mist while I reach out and touch her belly. My baby is having a baby, and I’m beyond excited. I can’t wait to be a grandmother. Tia moves my hand around her belly until I feel movement. I look up at Tia, and she has a massive smile on her face. “Baby missed its grandma.” I laugh and wipe my eyes.“No….no, not grandma. I do
~Nikki~I tossed and turned all night in anticipation. I feel like I did when I was in high school and had a crush on a guy. This is ridiculous because I’m a grown-ass woman, and I shouldn’t be crushing on my former Alpha, my daughter’s father-through-mate. I should be ashamed and disgusted at my actions, but I just can’t seem to get there.I swear you are acting like a hussy!Who, me? Yes, you! Why are you encouraging things?Look here, human, I have nothing to do with your desires! You make your own choices; I just so happen to agree with this choice. Aluma is right; of course, I just want someone to blame. I don’t know what’s come over me, but I think I really like Paul.I take extra care in getting dressed today. I want to make sure I look good. I put on a dark blue Wonder Woman scrub top and dark blue bottoms. I like having the fun scrub tops, and there were many times they appealed to my patients, making my day easier. I’ve let my hair grow out, so it’s now in a bob instead of
~Nikki~To say I was scared shitless is an understatement. I was so busy talking to myself that I didn’t realize Paul had walked up on me in the clinic. Suddenly my mouth goes dry as I stare at him. His jeans are tight enough that I can make out his muscles, and his v-neck is stretched across his body with his arms crossed. I move my tongue along my lips, watching his eyes watch that action. This can’t be real…..he can’t really be into me. I’ve let my mind create magnificent delusions. “I….I’m sure there are many other things you could be doing.” Paul drops his arms and saunters up to me, a smirk on his face. He stands behind me, and I feel his breath on my neck.“I’m a retired Alpha, so I have a lot of free time. That being said, who would pass up the chance to spend time with a beautiful woman? To add to that, you’re a doctor, so I get free medical instruction. It’s a win/win for me.” I swallow but immediately wish I hadn’t. That just made my mouth even drier. Paul brushes against m
I hate to pull myself away from Nikki; I swear I feel an actual pull to her, which is crazy. The only way I’d feel a pull to someone is if they were my fated mate, and Nikki isn’t that. I ignored my feelings and the pull to leave her. My son is waiting for me, and I can’t keep him waiting. I head into the packhouse, greeting pack members as I go. I always wanted to have a pack that respected me, and I was able to accomplish that. I love the fact that my pack members have always found it easy to talk to or come to me when they need to. I will never forgive myself for allowing the treatment that Tia went through, though. She always says it isn’t my fault, but I feel if I had been more diligent, I would have seen what was going on. I had a feeling things were off, but I allowed Stuart to push me off the path of realization, and there's no excuse for that. The office door is open, so I walk right in; Landon is sitting at his desk. He looks up from his paperwork, and a smile breaks on hi
~Nikki~I swear I couldn’t concentrate for the rest of the day. I kept thinking back to Paul being at the clinic with me, and then my mind went to dinner tonight. Why did I agree to have dinner with him? It’s probably one of the dumbest choices I’ve ever made. I sigh and get out of the shower. I wipe a part of the mirror clear so I can see myself. I look haggard, feeling like an old woman. I have no idea what I’m doing right now. Am I trying to….to date?! I must be going crazy if I think I’m going to date with three grown daughters. Not just date, but date the former Alpha! I’m officially off my rocker, for sure. Oh, stop, Nikki. You still look as good as the day we finished puberty. As good as we did before the pups. You need to go and show Paul the woman you are and let him show you that he’s a man. Wear something slutty. I roll my eyes but say nothing. Aluma and I have been back and forth about this since I stupidly accepted his dinner invite. She sees nothing wrong with this, ye
~Paul~I stand in the dining room and turn slowly, trying to make sure I didn’t miss anything. I have two candles on the table, lit. I have wine ready to pour, and the meal is complete. I made my specialty: Mississippi pot roast, roasted asparagus, potatoes au gratin, and white rice. I didn’t bother with dessert because I hope this evening turns out well. If not, well, I’m sure I can find some ice cream somewhere. I can feel the butterflies in my stomach, which only increases when the doorbell rings. She’s here, and I’m not sure that I’m ready. I take a deep breath and walk to the door. I place my hand on the handle, take one last deep breath, and open the door. I swear my jaw hit the floor. My heart is pounding in my chest, and I really can’t breathe. If I had thought Nikki was beautiful before, nothing could prepare me for what I’m looking at now. She is absolutely stunning. She’s wearing a black halter dress. It fits her body like a glove and stops mid-thigh. The window from the h
~Nikki~Paul stands up swiftly, which untangles our bodies. I’m breathing heavily, and my mind is cloudy. I have no idea how we arrived here, but I want to see it through, no matter how nervous I am. I want Paul back on me, but I’m still confused about everything. The food was terrific, and I wouldn’t mind finishing the meal, but this…..this is quickly becoming even better. The time to think is not there for me because Paul quickly grabs my arm and pulls me up. He pushes my body flush with his, his hands finding their way to my ass. He backs me up until my waist hits the edge of the table. Paul’s hands find their way to my thighs, and he lifts me, causing me to wrap my legs around his waist. Paul sits me on the table, spreading my legs. Paul settles between my legs and attacks my neck with his mouth. I run my hands up and down his torso, enjoying the feel of his muscles clenching beneath my touch. Paul uses his tongue up and down my neck. He nibbles on my marking spot, causing my bo
The morning light hits me, and I try to cover my face. I turn in bed, feeling the soreness of my body. My eyes pop open when I remember what I did last night. I’m sore because my body was worshipped all night long. After the dining table, we stopped in the living room, on the stairs, and had a few rounds in the bed before collapsing. Even when I was younger, I’d never gone so hard with someone. Stuart and I did what we did, but it was always when he was in the mood. He wasn’t horrible, but he wasn’t the most sensitive when it came to making me feel good. Paul was so attentive that I started to feel bad. I felt I didn’t give him nearly as much as he gave me. I move sharply to the side at the thought of Paul. The bed is empty, and I’m slowly starting to panic. I hear no sounds from the bathroom or scents indicating food being made. Maybe this was just a one-night thing. Maybe Paul isn’t here to try to make it easier to walk away. My phone pings and I look over at the nightstand. I ha