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My second treatment
Terakhir Diperbarui:
2024-12-19 20:37:02
Bab terkait
The web I can’t unweave My talk with Darren
I didn’t realize the look on Darren’s shifting so quickly as I mentioned my date with Maverick. I didn’t think much of it. Maybe he was just concerned about my safety as his patient. “Yep. I also got my internship.” I was still impressed with myself for getting this internship - even if it was on a trial basis with Maverick as my competitor. “Well you’ve had a very eventful time since your last treatment. I’m very happy that you got your internship.” Darren reaches forward and gives my hand a squeeze while smiling. He seems bothered by my date confession? I take a moment to think.It would be inappropriate for my doctor to have any interest in me. Although Darren hasn’t made any advancements, I feel like he’s been giving me a lot of attention. I wanted to think he was just caring to his patients but he especially made time to sit with me on both my treatment appointments.“Penny for your thoughts?” Darren asked as he looks into my eyes. It felt almost like he was looking for a re
Terakhir Diperbarui : 2024-12-27The web I can’t unweave Finally home
The moment I got home, I got a text notification from Dr. Darren.D: Good evening Cassandra, I spoke with your parents and everything is set for tomorrow. We will be meeting at The Oakridge Bistro at 7P.M tomorrow for your celebratory dinner. Would you like me to pick you up for dinner?Getting picked up by my doctor seemed a bit odd. This seemed a bit like a date. Other than the fact that my parents would be present. As much as I’d like to say I was excited, I also wanted Maverick to be there. C: Okay! I think I’ll drive myself. Can I meet you there? I opted to drive myself. I still didn’t know Darren’s intentions and felt that driving myself would be more comfortable. D: Okay, if you change your mind or aren’t feeling well - please don’t hesitate to let me know. I look forward to celebrating you tomorrow. Have a good night.He was professional and kind even in his texts. Other than the dinner he had planned with my family. I didn’t know what to make of his interest in me. Just as
Terakhir Diperbarui : 2024-12-28The web I can’t unweave My dinner with my doctor
The day passed fairly quickly and I found myself getting ready for dinner with my parents and my oncologist. It felt odd to say the least. I drove to the bistro Darren sent me and find him waiting for me outside the restaurant. “Hey, your parents are at the table ordering drinks. Shall we?” He held out his arm to guide me. A very gentleman-like approach. “Okay.” I give him my arm and follow his lead. Once we walk inside, I see my parent smiling with the kind of smile that you see in movies. “Hi sweetie!” My mom says excitedly as my father stands up, embracing into one of infamous bear hugs. “Hi guys! Why do you look so excited?” “Oh we’re just happy to see you!” They nod and smile in unison. Darren then pulls out my seat for me and pushes it in as I sit. “Dr. Rosario said it was safe for you have wine.” My mother says as the waiter comes with a vintage red and four glasses. “Oh, thank you. All this commotion for an internship?” I was confused. “We just want to ce
Terakhir Diperbarui : 2025-01-04The web I can’t unweave The rest of dinner
“Cassandra, I don’t expect you to answer right now. I just want you to think about it. I’ve spoken with your parents and gotten their consent but I do know that it is ultimately your choice. Please, just take some time to consider.” He was enamored with me. He spoke in a way that showed me he wanted the opportunity without having to beg for it. But what about Maverick? I was just getting to know him and I felt like there was so much potential there. “Okay, I’ll consider but on my terms. If the answer is no, that’s the end of it.” I don’t think I’d be able to say yes with how fresh everything with Maverick is. It’s not that I don’t find Dr. Rosario attractive but I almost felt it to be very odd that he sprang into this decision and even asked my parents for permission. Did he just have a kink of dying or vulnerable women? I couldn’t help but think the worst of him in this moment.“So who is this mystery guy you’re seeing?” My mom asks as we eat dinner.“Well his name is Maverick. We a
Terakhir Diperbarui : 2025-01-04The web I can’t unweave Darren’s advances
Unexpectedly, Darren leans in and presses his lips against mine. I forget what’s going on for a moment and melt into the kiss. Even with it feeling good - it still didn’t feel right. I pull back from Darren who seems shocked. “I’m sorry. I just don’t know if this is a good idea.” I look down at my hands to avoid eye contact. “I understand that you’re conflicted but can I know why?” Darren looks genuinely confused. “You’re my doctor and I’m a patient at your oncology office. Don’t you think that’s an odd place for you and I to be in?” I’m your patient and you’re treating me for brain cancer. How could you be enamored with a dying person? But I kept that thought to myself. Hearing the false promises and affirmations of life whenever the word dying came up - was exhausting and I didn’t like sugar-coating. “Whether you want to pursue this or not, I’m still going to provide you with the best care possible. That doesn’t have to change.” It didn’t but it did sound conditional. “
Terakhir Diperbarui : 2025-01-05The web I can’t unweave Home at last
After our meals, we say our goodbyes and I walk with my parents to their car.“Cass, we just want you to be happy and see you in love maybe just once. We didn’t mean to hurt your feelings.” My dad says as he was always the one within reason.“I get it and I appreciate it but I love what I do. I’m not giving up on life just because I have no one. I am dating and I’ll commit when I’m ready.” I give a shy smile. I knew my parents meant well but match-making with my doctor was not one of their brightest ideas.I watch as they get into the car and turn around to see Darren waiting to walk me to mine.“Well, I think this dinner was the most interesting dinner I’ve had in a while. How about you?” He jokes as we walk through the parking garage across the street from the restaurant. Thankfully, he wasn’t taking everything so seriously at this moment.“It was the weirdest of dinners, but the restaurant was nice. Thank you.” I didn’t blame him for how he felt. He opened my eyes to things I hadn’
Terakhir Diperbarui : 2025-01-05The web I can’t unweave The truth
“How about we go my place and talk? Then I’ll answer any questions you have and tell you everything.” The idea of him knowing made me nervous but there weren’t many options at this point. “Okay, but you have to be completely open about everything.” He knew I’d try to give a synapse version. “Fine.” I give Maverick directions to my apartment and we’re there in a matter of ten minutes. Not enough time for me to mentally prepare for all that I would have to tell him. I unlock the door to my apartment and open the door for Maverick to come in. I see his facial expression is blank until his eyes fall on the typewriter placed carefully on a small desk in the corner of my living room with a chair in front. I see a small smile escape when he sees it. “Do you want something to drink?” I ask as I reach for the refrigerator door in my kitchen. “Water is fine.” He says as he sits down on the couch, waiting for the conversation to begin. I bring two bottles of water to the couch and slowl
Terakhir Diperbarui : 2025-01-07The web I can’t unweave The response
As I sit there, waiting for Maverick to respond. I think of the word: Eremition. The act of gradually fading from the lives of others - in desire of solitude. That’s what I had become in the last few years of chasing a legacy. But here, I was transparent. I was showing my vulnerability and weakness to a man, rather than showing my strengths and accomplishments. It made me feel extremely exposed.“You have cancer?” He asks as he slowly sets down his water bottle. His tone said he was in disbelief. I had that same tone when I asked that very same question.“I do. That’s why I’ve been pushing so deeply to make a legacy for myself and why that gentleman at the shop gifted me the typewriter.” I say as I gesture towards the beautiful piece of history sitting just nearby.“Why wouldn’t you tell me this?” He asks as if his care could cure me.“Because it’s depressing. The pitiful stares, the remorse and the way people treat you as if you’re so fragile - would you want to be looked at as a wit
Terakhir Diperbarui : 2025-01-09
Bab terbaru
The web I can’t unweave My consciousness
I don’t remember what happened exactly.I remember a nose bleed that was problematic.A conversation with Darren that was uncomfortable and then darkness. I slowly look at my surroundings to find myself still in the oncology treatment bay and Darren is sitting by my side.“What happened to me?” I groggily ask as I search my mind for answers.“You lost consciousness for a few minutes. I believe you were overwhelmed.” I could tell by his response that he was giving as little and as much information as possible.“Why was I overwhelmed?” I didn’t need to be tip-toed around. I needed to know what was happening to me.“You ran your fingers through your hair and well, some of it came out.” He fidgets with his fingers as he says what I feared most in the beginning.“I’m going to lose all of it, aren’t I?” I sit back to contemplate my life. What would it be like once I looked just as sick and they told me I was? What would people see? Or worst, how would they treat me?“Your hair can grow bac
The web I can’t unweave My episode
I push the tissue to my nose and apply pressure as Darren grabs a first-aid kit on the shelf across from me - returning with a stop bleed stick and placing it gently into my nose.“What’s happening to me?” I ask in a nasal tone as I try to calm my roaring thoughts.“It’s just a side effect of the radiotherapy. Bleeding isn’t uncommon.” He says as he holds the stick inside my nose.“I’m not going to be able to go back to EnviroDoc, am I?” I needed to know if this was going to be my life as I proceed treatment.“You can go back. You just have to listen to your body and take it easy sometimes.” He makes it seem easy. “It’s going to tough for a little bit while your body tries to cope with the radiation but you can do it.”“What if I can’t?” I ask as the tears begin rolling down my face.“Hey, it’s going to be okay. I’ll do everything I can to make sure you get better. This is just the beginning of a long journey but it’ll pass.” He says with a soft smile.“I’m vomiting, losing consciousn
The web I can’t unweave Darren’s proclamation
“Are you sure about your choice?” He asks as he clasps his hands together.“My choice?” Was he referring to Maverick? My choice in one man or the other? “Yes. I know you chose to pursue treatment and since the very first one, I felt a connection to you. I know you felt it too.” He says as he makes unbreakable eye contact with me. This was not the kind of conversation I thought I’d be having while being injected with radiation.“I did but my connection with him was growing as well and he’s made me happy.” I think back to when I first met him. I had been swoon after our dream but after seeing his genuine nature - I was very enamored. His confidence, intelligence and appearance were paired with care, compassion and dedication. I never thought a man like that existed or that someone like that would be interested in me nonetheless. “I didn’t think that the moment we spoke in the bathroom would lead you to him.” He bows his head.“But it was a clarifying moment, Darren. It just didn’t go
The web I can’t unweave Time for more treatment
After what has come our nightly ritual, we laid down for bed. Maverick had cuddled me close until I fell asleep.I awoke the next morning to my alarm. I’d have my first radiotherapy enhancement today. I look over to see Maverick is still sleeping and I shuffle quietly out of bed. I almost make it out until I feel a hand grab my wrist. “It’s early. What’s wrong?” I look over to see Maverick peaking at me groggily.“Treatment - today. I have to be at the hospital in twenty minutes.” I say as I stare down at the bed.“Want me to come?”“No, get some rest. I’ll only be gone about an hour.” I lean over to kiss him and then get ready to leave. I watch as he rolls onto his side and falls back to sleep.This was the first time Maverick had been there when I woke up. His chiseled features accented by the shadows of light dancing along the curtain. His hair thrown carelessly and his blue eyes - out of sight as he slept. He reminded me of what Greek mythology expressed as Gods. As u admired his
The web I can’t unweave Home at Last
Once we get back to my apartment, Maverick wakes me gently and picks me up to bring me inside. He gently opens the door and takes me directly to my bed. He then shuts the door and brings himself back to the room, sitting down in the bed carefully.“You feeling okay?” He asks carefully as if the words were boulders that would roll over me if spoken too loudly.“Yeah. I’m just really tired.” Not a complete lies I was tired although I was more exhausted than anything and it had nothing to do with a lack of sleep. I wasn’t improving the way we had hoped, my health was slowly interfering with my life, my doctor seems intent on pursuing me even while I have my person sitting in the same bed as me, I embarrassed myself at EnviroDoc and there’s still the cherry to top it all off: I have brain cancer. A cruel sick joke that taunts me relentlessly so I meant it wholeheartedly when I said I was tired.I look up at Maverick to see his mind is steadily at work. He had read between the lines. There
The web I can’t unweave Finally free of the hospital
After Darren left, I waited about an hour while Maverick stayed resting peacefully at my side. Waiting for my discharge was just as eerie as walking up in this same room once again.I hear a knock at the door as the nurse slowly enters. She sees Maverick sleeping and decides to speak to me quietly.“Ms. Richardson, these are your discharge papers. The doctor has added your new treatment regiment in which you’ll be following up in the oncology department. I believe he spoke with you already?” “Yes. I’m aware.” I say quietly as I try not to wake Maverick.“Okay, great. Well there are some health guidelines to follow for your condition and the doctor has added a prescription of antacids for your stomach and zofran for your nausea. I have your prescriptions as the doctor requested they be sent and filled to in-office pharmacy. Do you have any questions for me?” She asks as she carefully hands me the paperwork and a bag containing my prescriptions. “No, thank you. Am I okay to leave now?
The web I can’t unweave My results
After more than an hour of imaging, Darren returns me to my room. “I’ll be back to go over your imaging with you in a bit. Is there anything I can get for you in the meantime?” Darren asks with a sad smile. I think I’m okay. Thank you, Darren” I look at Maverick as Darren leaves the room. He looks exhausted and yet he found time to raid the vending machine for snacks and a drink. “Hungry? I had some time to get a few things since I didn’t know how long we’ll be here? He smiles slightly. We? He was free to leave at any time but he intended on staying even though he was exhausted. “I’m okay right now. Do you want to share the bed with me for a nap instead?” I start to scoot over, leaving half of the blanket for him. “An irresistible offer.” He smiles as he gets into my bed. He then puts his arm behind my head and brings me closer to him. “Are you tired?” He asks. “Not really but this is nice.” “Well the nurse gave me a tablet where you can stream shows while you’re here. Care t
The web I can’t unweave Still in the ER
I try to rest as I wait for Darren to return to take me to imaging. As I slept, I begin to dream of things I’d never considered for myself in the future. I am in bed reading a children’s’ book to a tiny human, smiling as I turn the pages and see their excitement and hear the word ‘mommy’ echo as the child looks up at me. A moment passed as I reply ‘yes baby’ with a smile. I continue reading until all of a sudden - it’s dark outside and the darkness engulfs the room. Once the light returns, I’m in a white room. It’s large and empty space making it feel like a cage of white walls. I instinctively pick up pieces of crayons and write on the walls as if in a trance and begin writing my fears on each wall of my enclosure.No loveDeathNo familyDeathCancerDeathNo legacy DeathBy the time, I stop writing, every surface of that room was covered in fears written in different colors and ‘DEATH’ written in capital letters and red crayon all over. I then get up and begin touching each wall.
The web I can’t unweave My not so short ER visit
“Cassandra, what happened? You seemed fine this morning and I have you on the schedule to come in tomorrow.” he says as he reads my chart - making no effort in acknowledging Maverick sitting by my side. “Well I got dizzy and went to the bathroom at work and the next thing I remember is vomiting blood.” I look down at my legs, trying to remember anything else but that seems like everything. “Have you eaten anything strange lately?” He asks as he washes his hands to put on gloves. “No. I didn’t even eat breakfast this morning.” “I’ll be checking you over and we’ll see what’s the next steps. Okay?” Darren makes his way towards me. “Okay.” Maverick keeps his hand on mine as Darren examines me. He touches my lymph nodes, listens to my lungs and heart, checks my tonsils and ears but finds nothing out of the ordinary. “I’m not seeing anything that would have caused that bleeding externally so I’d like to press on your abdomen to make sure there isn’t any discomfort.” “Okay.” I lay
