Chapter 7 - New Beginnings

Leo

I walk on the school property not really ready to get into the grind of the coming week. I am tired as usual, it’s a miracle I woke up this morning.. I get to the parking lot where all the popular kids hang out. Their car doors open and music blasting from their speakers. I know if I look straight ahead I’ll see Golden. She’s with her friends leaning

Zach’s words filter into my head uninvited. I look straight ahead and Golden is looking in my direction. I quickly look down my heart in my throat. I look behind me maybe there’s someone there, a bunch of 8^th graders are leaning on a wall. But they are not looking in her direction, they are staring at a phone.

 I look back up at Golden and she’s still looking at me. I look away and take deep breaths. Was she looking at me? Why would she be looking at me?  Am I tripping?

I need to get my head straight there’s no way in hell Golden was looking at me. she doesn’t even know I exist.

I get to homeroom just as the bell rings. Most of the students are already in class.

“Good morning” Zach says to me when I sit down.

“Morning bro” I say and will my heart to slow down. I can hear Golden come down the hall. The sound of her voice makes my heart skip every time I hear speak but today is different.

“I feel good today” Zach says next to me.

“You feel good every day Zach” I say looking anywhere but at the door where Golden will walk through in 3…2…1

“I have a feeling something miraculous is going to happen.” Zach says and I half hear him because my heart is beating in my ears at this point.  She walks through the doorway and walks past me. She stops a few feet from my desk and turns to Zach.

“Hi Zach” she says to him and smiles. I look at Zach who is beaming at her. What’s happening?

  “Morning Golden, how are you today?” He says to her and looks at me for a split second his goofy smile back on his face. Then he looks back at her.

“I’m well, thanks for asking. How are you?” she says smiling at him. I’m confused; did I wake up in a different lifetime? Why is Golden all friendly with Zach?

“Good morning class, please let’s get settled.” Mr Swan says and Golden moves away from Zach. I turn and look at him and he gives me hidden thumbs up.

I want to know what’s going on here. But our first class is English today and Miss Green doesn’t like students talking, she’ll send you to detention in a heartbeat. So I won’t be able to ask Zach about this whole Golden situation. I can’t afford detention but I’m tempted to risk it all and ask Zach what the hell is going on in her class.

I can deal with the consequences later. I look at Zach weighing my options. I shake my head no. What’s wrong with me?

I’ll have to ask him at lunch, since we don’t have any classes together after English.

I get through the morning with so many questions and the fact that Golden and I have the exact same classes isn’t helping. I catch myself looking at her sometimes. And I caught her looking at me at several times during the day too.  Or I could be dreaming, today is a weird day.

At lunch break I head to our spot, we always have lunch in front of the principal’s office. There is a great spot under a large tree, where there are stacked bricks.. Zach is still in a good mood of’ course. I say hi to Dan, Brian and Wes.

I sit on the bricks next to Zach and start having my lunch. He looks at me with this I told you so look on his face.

“Is there something you want to share with me?” I ask finally indulging him.

“Well…” he starts and he’s interrupted by a voice

“Hey” Golden says behind us.  The whole group turns to look at her.

“Hey” Zach says first and the rest of us follow saying hey.

“I wanted to apologize for the way Cole acted at the party.” She says to Zach and the rest of us stare at the exchange open mouthed. This is like an eclipse. Wait eclipses are not rare enough. This is a miracle.

“No, you don’t have to apologize. You did nothing wrong.” He says smiling at her.

“Well I felt bad and thought that I should come and apologize anyway.” She says and looks at me for a moment.

“Well I appreciate your kindness and just know that we’re good. I would offer you a taco as a symbol of my accepting your apology but …” Zach says raising his empty hands. Golden laughs and I almost choke on my lunch. 

“Maybe next time” She says when she finally stops laughing.

“You know what I might hold you to that.” He says looking from me to her.

“Well okay” She says and looks at me again. Then she starts walking away. I turn back around and go back to eating my lunch. I try to process what just happened but none of it makes sense.

“What the hell was that bro?” Wes asks voicing the exact question I have but very afraid to ask. I don’t know if I want to know the answer. Does Golden like him? They spoke to each other so easily.

“That my friend is the Zachary charm” He says smiling at me. He winks at me and goes back to eating his lunch.

“What the hell are you talking about? There is nothing charming about you.” Dan says laughing.

“Well you don’t know that now do you?”Zach says smiling. What is he saying?

 I feel my heart going at a twice it’s normal speed, what if Golden and Zach like each other. That would suck.

The bell rings and we have to go back to class.

“We’ll talk later.” Zach says to me when we head back to class. I nod at him hiding the fact that I want to die on the inside.

It would break my heart if they actually like each other, Zach is my boy and I love him.

To be honest, I can’t lie and say I would be happy for him if he and Golden started dating.

 I walk back to class feeling al the stress in the world come over me. Why did I allow Zach to get all these ideas about Golden to get into my head? Everyone knows that a girl like Golden will never look at me. She’ll go for someone like Zach, someone who comes from a well off family. Not me, who doesn’t even know where his mom is, let’s not even get into where my father is.

I sigh instead of screaming which is what I really want to do.