Chapter 5: Don't Let Me Go

“MOMMY!”

My heart pounded when I heard that voice. When I turned around, I saw a little girl running towards me. I’m guessing she was around five years old. She had chubby cheeks, curly blonde hair, and bright blue eyes. She was beaming as she tried to reach out her tiny hands to me. The sight tugged at my heartstrings. She looked so beautiful and yet, so familiar which was odd because this was my first time seeing her.

I should know because I would have remembered that face. That was a face that was not easy to forget.

She stopped when she was in front of me. And when she smiled at me, my chest swelled with so much warmth, joy, and pride.

Wait. Pride? But why?

I didn’t even know her. But somehow, it felt like my heart knew her, like I was gazing at a face that I had known my whole life which was really weird.

And when she held my hand, all of her dainty fingers were clasped on mine, it felt cathartic that I found myself suddenly tearing up. What was this feeling? Who was she? How could someone so little affect me this way?

When I regained my composure, I smiled. It was simply hard not to smile while looking at her. “Hello, kid. Who are you?” I asked.

Her smile vanished. Sadness instantly clouded her face. Seconds later and she began sobbing. “It’s me, Mommy. Please don’t let me go.”

As soon as she said those words, Zachary’s image popped in my head. And then I froze as the realization dawned on me. This little girl was… the King’s daughter?

Before I knew it, I took my hand back and run away from her. I could hear her calling me. She was crying harder this time...

“My Queen, are you okay? You’ve been crying in your sleep.”

I woke up when I heard Lilia’s voice. She was right. My cheeks were damped with tears and my chest was still heaving. I quickly wiped my tears away and sat straight. I must have dozed off while she was driving. I keep falling asleep these days.

I cleared my throat. “Where are we now?”

“We’ve been in front of the clinic for a while now, my Queen. I’ve discussed things with the management. To ensure your privacy, the clinic will take no one else but you for the rest of the day. They are now expecting you. We can head in anytime you are ready.”

I stared at the clinic through the car window. It looked as secluded as Lilia described to me. It was an old vacation house which was surrounded by huge trees. The house was almost impossible to notice from afar. The tall gates were rusty and there were no other establishments nearby.

Lilia promised to find a good place and she delivered. According to her research, this was the go-to clinic of the top female celebrities and daughters from affluent families each time they wanted to get an abortion. From Zambales, my grandmother’s province, we went to Manila with the excuse of locating Terrence and then we traveled to Tagaytay.

Lilia sat at the driver’s seat patiently, waiting for my next order. Yet, I remained quiet. A week ago, when I found out that I was pregnant, I was so sure that this was what I wanted. I’d been anxious the entire week. I couldn’t wait for this day.

But now, I couldn’t seem to open the door.

I leaned on my seat. My chest felt heavy. Until now, I still can’t believe how a few hours of lust could change my whole life. That night with Zachary was the only time I’d ever been reckless.

This month was supposed to be my first break because I had worked as his secretary for years. I never took a break because I had nowhere to go to at that time.

So, I should be enjoying this freedom. I wouldn’t get to have this again the moment I start ruling the Hunters. But everything was a disaster from day one.

Lilia’s voice seemed hesitant when she said, “My Queen, are you okay?”

“Lilia, if I tell you that right now, I have absolutely no idea what to do, will you be ashamed of me? Will you find me weak?” I asked instead.

She smiled tenderly and responded with sheer confidence, “Never, my Queen.”

When I heard that, a sob escaped from my lips. Lilia was the only one who knew my situation. She and I grew up together along with Terrence and Alucard. When we were still in the orphanage, the four of us used to be inseparable. We were so close to one another that’s why when the Dela Torres’ wanted to only take me and my twin, we begged them to adopt Alucard and Lilia as well.

When the couple agreed provided that Terrence and I would do their bidding, we were on cloud nine. We thought being adopted by the wealthiest couple in town was the beginning of a life that we were dreaming of. But that was all just an illusion. If only Terrence and I knew what was waiting for us in the Dela Torre residence, we never would have let our friends get dragged down in this hell.

That was our greatest regret.

Thinking about it now, Alucard was not always a heartless man. In fact, he used to be one of the most compassionate people I knew. But living with the Hunters had changed him the way it changed me and continues to change me until now.

“Lilia, do you blame me for the kind of life you have now? If not for me and Terrence, there is a possibility that you and Alucard would get adopted by a more decent couple. You would have lived differently.”

Lilia took her seatbelt off. She held my hand and gave it a light squeeze. I knew her feelings for Terrence. The two were so deeply in love with each other. And I know that she was just as worried as me now that he had suddenly gone off the grid.

Despite that, I’d given Lilia another thing to worry about: my pregnancy. How merciless of me.

“What are you saying? Terrence, you, and Alucard had been my family ever since I could remember. Without you and your twin, I wouldn’t have been alive. I will always be grateful for that. I had been at death’s door many times than I could count but both of you had saved me every single time. And you had given me the chance to escape so many times as well.”

“But you didn’t. You are the craziest human being I know.”

She laughed. “I didn’t because I chose this life. Believe it or not, I am happy, Kate… because I am with you. I am with my family.” She wiped my tears. “This is the first time I’m seeing you cry. You said that the day you will cry will be the day the world will end. Does this mean that it’ll be the end of the world soon? Am I going to die?”

“Don’t say that!”

“Just kidding. Whatever you decide to do today, I will be on your side, Kate, I promise.”

“Thank you, Lilia. I dreamt about her; you know.”

“Who?”

My voice cracked when I replied, “My baby.”

Her eyes widened. “Oh, God.”

“She called me ‘Mommy’, Lilia. I did hear that Vampires have incredible abilities and maybe this was one of her abilities manifesting through my dream.” I held my stomach. “She’s the loveliest thing I’ve ever seen in my whole life. The cracks inside me, my broken pieces, all that seemed to disappear when I saw her smile at me. Her eyes were glowing. When I felt the warmth of her touch, I felt full. For the first time in my life, I felt complete. And when she cried, begging me not to let her go, it hurt me. In my dream, I turned away from her. But it broke me, Lilia.” I shook my head as tears streamed down my cheeks. “I don’t think I can do this. The Hunters will kill me for this, but I don’t think I could let her go.”