I Shouldn't Have Let Her Go

Amber.

I can't shake her from my mind. After all these years, seeing her again tonight was like ripping open an old wound that never fully healed. I thought I’d moved on, buried those feelings somewhere deep enough that they couldn’t touch me anymore.

But the moment she looked up at me, every emotion I’d worked so hard to forget came flooding back.

Breaking up with her is still my worst mistake. I should have fought for us; I should never have allowed my work to get in the way between us. I was a fool. A big one.  

A few years ago, after my graduation, I wanted to reach out and reconnect, hoping to get back with her, but that was when I found out that she’s now married, so I’d convinced myself that keeping my distance was for the best. I figured her being married was my sign that she’d moved on, and it was time I did the same.

But seeing her tonight, with that hollow look behind her smile, made me question everything. There was something about her tonight—something that gnawed at me long after she disappeared into the crowd. She was no longer that cheerful girl I used to know; the warmth was gone, and the fire in her eyes seem to have dimed.

The fear in her eyes when she looked at her husband was subtle, but I saw it. I know Amber too well to miss the signs when she’s pretending.

Attending this event was supposed to help me network with some potential business partners in the city. But I haven’t been able to concentrate on anything else since Amber bumped into me.

“Where was your head all night?” my best friend Brian asks as we say our goodbyes to some guests while waiting for the valet to bring the car around. We both attended the event together. Brian owns several upscale clubs in the city and is a regular at events like this.“You seemed distracted, and it’s so unlike you.”

“She was here, man.” I pull my fingers through my hair taking in a deep breath of the evening air. “Amber,” I add. Brian and I have been friends since high school so she knows about Amber.

“Yeah, I know; I saw her and her husband. Well, it’s hard not to when everyone keeps fawning about how much her husband dotes on her,” Brian says with a bit of annoyance.

“So you knew she was going to be here? Some heads up would have been nice, man.”

Brian shakes his head, shrugging. “I didn’t know she’d be here tonight. But they pop up at these events a lot—her husband’s got the social-climber vibe down. He’s always pushing to get into places like this.”

I nod, a faint smile forming as I glance over at Brian. “Guess I wasn’t wrong about him then. But how come you never mentioned you’d run into Amber at any of these events?”

Brian gives a casual shrug. “I didn’t think it mattered. We’ve only spoken a couple of times, and honestly, I doubt she even recognized me.”

I can’t help but chuckle, glancing at him. Back in high school, Brian was overweight, but now he’s all muscle—a near bodybuilder. “You can’t blame her,” I joke, giving him a once-over.

He laughs, punching my arm. “Some of us had to glow up, okay? But listen, if she’s the one that’s got you so worked up, don’t overthink it. Just focus on why you’re back here. You’ve got bigger things ahead of you.”

I know he’s right. But seeing her again has already upended everything I thought I had under control. And somehow, I don’t think that feeling is going away anytime soon.

Brian grabs the keys from the valet, and as he pulls the car around, I tip the valet and slide into the passenger seat beside him.

“I know that look,” Brian says, giving me a serious glance as he settles in behind the wheel.

“What are you talking about?” I try to sound casual, but he knows me too well.

“She’s married, man. I can see you’re not over her, but you’ve got to let it go.”

I sigh, running a hand over my face. “She didn’t look happy, Brian. There was something in her eyes...”

Brian shakes his head, his tone shifting to a gentler plea. “Liam, there are plenty of beautiful women out there. You’ve got to move on from Amber.”

“That’s just it. Amber isn’t just any woman.”

“But she’s married. And from everything I’ve seen, she’s in love with her husband. She says it every chance she gets, and it’s all over the news. G****e them, if you don’t believe me.”

He doesn’t give me time to argue before he starts the car and pulls into the bustling city traffic. “Sullivan. That’s her husband’s name,” Brain supplies.

I pull out my phone and, within seconds, find articles and videos of Amber and Dan. Dan’s some sort of hotshot with a successful startup, and he’s always praising Amber’s influence on his business.

I read a few more articles before I decide I’ve seen enough. Maybe Brian’s right. Maybe I misread her. Maybe she’s happy in her marriage, after all.

As we pull up to one of Brian’s bars across from my hotel, he gestures to the front entrance. “Come on in. Have a drink before you head back to your room.”

“Yeah, sure.”

I step out, and we head inside, greeted by the low hum of music and the soft glow of lights. Brian signals to a waiter, who brings us two glasses of scotch as we settle into a private booth.

“Look around you, man,” Brian says, gesturing toward the crowd. “Plenty of gorgeous women who’d be happy to take your mind off her.”

I smirk, reaching for my glass. “You might be onto something., but I think this drink might just do the trick.” I down the scotch in one gulp, wincing as it burns down my throat. I glance at the waiter and lift my empty glass. “Bring the bottle.”

Brian raises a brow. “Easy there. I didn’t say you should get trashed.”

I shrug, lifting his untouched glass and finishing it off. “What’s wrong? Don’t want me supporting your business?” I say, giving him a crooked grin.

Brian laughs, shaking his head as I pour myself another drink. It’s going to be a long night.