Chapter 1

Chapter 1 

Victoria Abbel's Point of View

"When will you stop massaging your breast?" I heard someone said. Halos mabulunan ako dahil sa sinabi niya, kaya naman agad kong tinanggal ang pagkahawak sa dibdib ko. Napayuko na lang ako sa table dahil sa kahihiyan.

"Kelan ba malaki 'tong dibdib ko!? Kahit anong gawin ko hanggang ganito na lang talaga siguro 'to." Halos maiyak kong sabi. We are here in the cafeteria and I was with my friend named Georginna. And yes, even if we are in the cafeteria, I absentmindedly cupped my breast and started pinching it! I just hoped no one is looking at me. That will be embarrassing. I just remembered when I used to be in middle school, we are required to attend the flag ceremony. When the Philippine anthem was played in the stereo, you have to put your hands on your left chest, little did I know instead of putting my hands on my left chest, I am cupping my breast! Geez, there is really something wrong at me. Masyadong malaki ang epekto ng sinabi ni Trevor sakin noong bata pa ako.

"Subukan mo kayang magpaturok?" Georginna asked and sat beside me. She's got one piece apple and a yogurt. Georginna is my friend of mine since we're 7th grade. Isa lang siyang kaibigan ko while she's got more than one. Actually, I'm still thankful since I have her. 'Yung iba kasing tao lumalapit lang sa akin dahil sa apelyido ko. And since then, I started choosing my friend. At isa lang talaga ang natirang matatag at totoo, and she's Georginna. She's not that well-off but at least she's real. She's living with the scholarship granted by my parents. What can I say? We are really that rich.

"No! I want everything natural." I flipped my hair. Narinig kong bigla siyang naubo sa sinabi ko.

"Natural, huh? That's why you're always wearing contact lenses." I rolled my eyes at her. Yes, my eye is aqua blue. Blame me for having a Stanislaski blood. Pero dahil masyadong agaw pansin ay mas pinipili kong tabunan ito at magsuot ng contact lenses.

"You're already eighteen yet you still like the Dmitri guy?" Napasimangot ako habang nire-real talk ni Georginna.

"Hindi mo lang ako maiintindihan dahil hindi mo nararamdaman ang nararamdaman ko!" I said and pouted my lips. Yes, it's been what...6 years? Anim na taon na ako nagpapansin kay Trevor Dmitri, pero hanggang ngayon ay wala pa ding pagunlad ang pagtingin niya sa akin.

"So, anong balak mo after nitong lunch break?" Georginna asked me. Oo nga pala, Foundation day ngayon ng school, and there will be no classes because of activity period.

"Duh! Tinatanong pa ba 'yan? I'm going to wait for Trevor's performance this evening!" Excited kong pahayag. Trevor is a graduating student, while I'm still stuck here in senior high school! He's not a music major but every time there's an event here at the University, his band always plays. At syempre, hindi ako papahuli. Every gig, I am there. Always present, supporting my future husband. My concern is that he's famous at this university. Kaya naman marami din ang nagkakagusto sa kanya at hindi lang ako. Annoying.

"Daydreaming again? When will you accept that he doesn't like you back?" I gave her a death glare.

"He likes me, okay? In denial lang siya! Hmp!" I get my sandwich on the table and stand up, and left the table.

"Keep saying that to yourself, Tori. Good luck with that!" I heard her as she waves her hand at me. Bago pa ako makalabas ng cafeteria ay ilang babae ang lumapit sa kanya. They are five and they are handing me flowers and chocolates.

"Kapatid mo si Cainn diba? Pwede bang pakibagay sa kanya 'to?"

"Pinsan mo si Nikos diba? Can you give this to him?"

"Close ba kayo ng pinsan mong si Kalev? Baka kasi hindi niya ito tanggapin kung ako mismo ang magbibigay sa kanya."

"Kapatid ni Clevon!" Tawag sa akin ng isa pang babae. "Please give this to him, please." And handed me a box of chocolate cookies. Clevon hated chocolates.

Tiningnan ko ng masama ang huling babaeng magsasalita. Kinuha ko ang hawak niyang heart shaped design na lunch box at kinuha ito.

"Is this for Damien?" I asked her. Dahan dahan itong tumango. Geez, Damien was no longer in school yet there are still girls who keeps on giving him food and flowers. Huminga muna ako mg malalim at tumingin sa limang babae.

"Consider these as done." Hindi maipinta ang kanilang mga mata dahil sa saya. I smiled sincerely at them as I walk outside the cafeteria. First thing first, hindi ako naiinis sa kanila. Why would I? Sa ganitong paraan lang nila maipapakita ang paghanga nila sa mga kapatid at pinsan ko. And of course, I am like them too. Sino ba naman ako para pigilan sila sa gusto nilang gawin? If they want to give these things to them, then I will help them.

Kaya naman kahit may gagawin pa ako ay mas inuna kong hanapin ang aking mga kapatid. I saw Nikos first, with Kalev and Alexander.

"Nikos! Kalev! Wait!" sabi ko sa kanila nang bigla na lang nila akong lagpasan. What's wrong with them? Napailing na lang ako, oo nga pala ganito naman palagi. If we're in school, they don't acknowledge me as their cousin, and even my brothers don't acknowledge me as their sister! Kapag nakita nila ako sa hallway, lalagpasan lang nila ako! Gosh!

"What?" Bored na sabi ni Nikos sa akin at si Kalev naman ay nakatingin lang sa akin. Natatakot talaga ako sa kanya sa tuwing tinitingnan niya ako ng ganyan. Na para bang may kasalanan akong nagawa sa kanya. Nagtaasana bigla ang balahibo ko sa batok.

"This came from your admirers!" I said.

Kalev shrugged his shoulders and didn't even bother looking at me. Lumapit naman sa akin si Nikos ang tiningnan ang mga dala ko.

"Hmm...Throw it away." He said and put his hand inside his pocket. Sinamaan ko siya ng tingin. This is exactly why I hate them! Wala silang pakialam sa nararamdaman ng mga babaeng nagkakagusto sa kanila.

"Here it goes." I heard Alexander say.

"You asshole!" Sigaw ko kay Nikos at binato sa kanya ang mga bulaklak.

"What?" Natatawang sabi niya sa akin. Siguro ay pinagtatawanan na naman niya ang mukha ko.

I'm fuming mad!

"You're such a dick! Wala na sa sanang magkagusto sa'yo." I said and stick my tongue out. Nikos patted my shoulders.

"Chill out, cousin. Huwag mo naman sanang ibuhos sa akin ang frustration mo dahil hanggang ngayon hindi ka pinapansin ni Trevor." Nikos really love teasing me about Trevor. Trevor is their friend and he's really a snob.

"Bakit naman napasok si Trevor sa usapan?" Naiinis kong turan. Ibinaba ko lahat ng mga dapat kong ibigay para kay Nikos at Kalev. I crossed my shoulders and put it on my chest.

"By the way, impossibleng mangyari na walang magkakagusto sa akin. I'm Nikos, remember?" I rolled my eyes at him.

"Look, it's Trevor." Turo niya sa likod ko. Bigla akong nataranta.

"How do I look? How do I look?" Natatarantang sabi ko at pinipigilan ko ang sarili kong tumingin sa aking likuran.

"You looked like an egg." I kicked his foot and turn around but Trevor isn't there.

"Got you!" He said and laugh frantically.

"God, Tori. You looked like an ugly swan." He said still laughing. Ang lakas talagang mangasar nitong lalaking 'to! What's wrong with this guy! He really likes it when I am panicking. Nikos and his weirdness.

"Fuck you, a-hole!" Sigaw ko at pinaghahampas siya ng mga bulaklak.

"She's really a Stanislaski, don't you think?" I heard Alexander say, who's carrying a biology book.

"A nasty one," Kalev said back, giving a small chuckle.

All the girl's efforts had gone to waste. My two older brothers told me to fuck off. Aba akala mo naman ay ikinagwapo nila ang pagiging a-hole?! Hindi lang alam ng mga fan girls nilang mga dugyot sila lalo na sa bahay. Argh!

"Geez, they are so annoying," I whispered in the air.

Anyway, the show is almost starting. Nandito ako ngayon sa school amphitheater, waiting for Trevor to perform. I was on the first column, perks of being a Stanislaki. Being a Stanislaski has a lot of benefits yet tiring. They said we have all the luxury in the world, all the advantages, everything but people only know the surface. They don't bother looking inside what's really inside our family. I just don't want to spoil the fun, I'll just keep my mouth shut.

"Make some noise, everyone! Trevor Dmitri and his group is already here!" Sabi ng MC kaya nagsigawan lahat ng tao. At syempre, papahuli ba ako? Nilaksan ko ang aking sigaw as I saw the man of my life on the big stadium. Gosh! He's dazzling like a star from the sky and he's really born as an artist. Sino bang hindi magkakagusto kay Trevor? Even though he's quiet, he is still attractive as ever. To tell you the fact na mayroon akong standee niya sa loob ng kwarto ko. My brothers find it creepy. I consider it as my happiness. He's really handsome in his get up. It was a simple long sleeve and a pants. His eyes is mesmerizing. Para bang inaakit ka niya sa mga tingin pa lang niya at ang tangos ng kanyang ilong. Para bang hinulma ito ng maayos. Even his jawline! And his lips is to die for. Ilang taon ko na rin gustong halikan ang kanyang mga labi. Simula siguro noong twelve ako ay pinapanaginipan ko na kung gaano kalambot ang kanyang mga labi. I rarely see him smile though. That's why I like more about Trevor. He was so mysterious. And I love mysterious things.

My ship went down in a sea of sound

When I woke up alone, I had everything

Fuck!!! He really got a good voice. I curse under my breath when I heard him sing the first verse.

A handful of moments, I wished I could change

And a tongue like a nightmare that cut like a blade

Oh god! Pakiramdam ko tuloy kaming dalawa lang ni Trevor ang nasa buong lugar. No audiences, no band mates, just us.

In a city of fools, I was careful and cool

But they tore me apart like a hurricane

A handful of moments, I wished I could change

But I was carried away

And our eyes met! Halos kumawala na ang puso ko sa aking dibdib. And I'm afraid that my heartbeat is louder than the speaker.

Give me a therapy, I'm a walking travesty

But I'm smiling at everything

Therapy, you were never a friend to me

And you can keep all your misery

Pero napasimangot na lang ako ng bigla niyang iniwas ang kanyang mga mata. Ganon na ba niya ako hindi kagustong makita? Oh! Bigla ko tuloy hinawakan ang dibdib ko. I should better work on my breasts and maybe, he can finally notice me!

Hanggang matapos ang tatlong kanta ay nanatili akong nakatayo sa amphitheater. Hinayaan ko lang magsilabasan ang mga tao. When the way is visible, I walk straight to the backstage.

I just wanted to greet him, just like what I used to do. Binuksan ko lahat ng mga rooms sa back stage. There are five rooms in total, at apat na ang nabubuksan ko. Maybe they are using the fifth room. I excitedly opened the door.

Ang laki ng ngiti ko nang makita ko si Trevor. But my smile doesn't lasted that long when I saw him with a girl. Nakita ako agad ni Trevor and I saw him smirked while looking at me. He pull the girl towards him while still looking at me. As he whispered something before crashing his lips to the girl. He's kissing someone in front of me and I almost lost my breathing. Sumakit bigla ang dibdib ko sa aking nakita, lalo na at biglang umungol ang babae.

"Hmm...Trevor." To my shock, halos malaglag ang panga ko sa sahig. It was Georginna.

***