It has been tough since I spoke to Isabella. I can honestly say that I have pushed Caylee away since then. Now, I wish I can say that I don't know why. But I do.
I still have feelings for Isabella.
Now, what feelings? I have been too scared to think about it. I have been too scared to explore my heart to find out what they are.
We have three months and a week to go; things have been what I expected. The excitement, the passion, and the risks. But what I have not expected is Caylee. Now, this is another feeling I am now scared to explore.
And that brings me to this. Why do I need a woman to make me a man? Why do I need a woman to make me forget about another? Not that I am saying that Caylee is a rebound, but I have heard the stories going around at camp.
Now Caylee and I have not gone all the way yet, and now more than before, I am asking myself why? What has changed that I don't desire her so badly?
I wish I knew all the answers
Complete static. That is all I hear. It feels as if my world has come crashing down on me.I am not losing a man today. I am not losing a squad, and most of all, I am not losing Caylee. So it is with absolute frustration that I sit in a few agonizing moments and frantically try to get hold of Lewis and the Marines that were with him. I call for another unit to give me an update."Matthew. Come in.""Go ahead, Lieutenant.""Status on Lewis and his team.""They are under control now.""And Caylee?""Taken a shot to the chest. But her stats is fine.""Thank god! Get your asses back here.""Affirmative Lieutenant.""Roger. Over. Out."With that, I sigh in relief, once again, I should not, but I know the boys are coming back home and that Caylee is still alive. Now, this is a different kind of relief that I feel. Perhaps not the one that I truly thought that I would.So it is with anticipation that I wait
The moment that I heard that Caylee had gotten hurt, I could not bear thinking of how I would feel if I ever had to lose Isabella out of my life completely. I know it was the messed-up time to realize this, but I knew that I had to let go of this thing I thought I felt for Caylee. I was making her a way to run away from my pain, to deal with the heartache whenever Isabella pushed me away.Now here I am sitting, and I am asking the woman that I said I never want to see in my life again to take me back and somehow, even perhaps, forget that any of this has happened. My heart will not take to be even further rejected. I simply cannot live without this woman, and if she will give me half a minute, I will prove this to her.Is she will only say a word."Isi, did you hear what I said?""Yes, I think I did. Well, at least that is what my mind says.""Please, say something?""Clay, I, I think I must go. James is going to be home any minute."
…Matt POV…Now, I have been wanting to make this walk for a while. I don't quite know if it was to give Isabella a piece of my mind or if I wanted to give James what he deserves. Guess I will find out.As I step onto the porch, I need not even have to knock for James swings the door wide open, "What can I do for you, Jackson?""You can start by calling me by my name.""I don't need to call you anything. What do you want?""I am here to see Isabella.""Well, she is not here."Just the sight of this man makes me want to punch that goddamn ugly face of his in. I know full well she is here, and I am not going to stand here and play games with him."I want to see Isabella."Just then, Isabella steps out from behind him. It seems that she has been crying for his makeup has run down black over her cheeks. As I try to reach out for her, the asshole slaps my hand away."Oh, no, you did not just do that."
…Isabella POV…I promised James that I would never tell Clayton; he made me understand that if I do that, he would not only have him and myself killed. But the thing is that I cannot keep this in any longer; it has been killing me to be away from him. Yes, I did betray Clayton, but I cannot betray him any longer.So I swallow deep and try to breathe underneath what is only but stuttered breaths."Clay, James said that he would have you killed it. I have told you the truth.""Isi, what are you talking about?""He, he…god Clay, I am too scared.""Please, I will get Matty to phone the cops. Just tell me what is going on."Then out of nowhere, there come two men bursting through my front door. I can only but shout out one last word to Clayton, "Help."With that, Matty and I are forced into the back of a black van. The air is stuffy, and there is a small hint of something awfully smelling hanging in the air. The
…Matt POV…I am being dragged down the stairs into a dark hole; the first thing that overpowers me is the suffocating coldness that fills the air. The walls are covered in green algae from the constant rain that comes spilling in from the outside. The floor is but only covered in mud; you shall not find a bed or even a chair to sit on. There is no living thing that makes its way through here, not even a rat. And as for the smell, the only thing you shall smell is your own fear.This is by far the worst place you shall ever find yourself in.So the day comes even faster than night disappearsI have just spent my very first night in this dark and very much suffocating hole. Well, I do not quite know if the sun has risen or if it is still pitch black outside. I fear that I shall spend my time in here for days and days. I fear that something should happen to me in this godforsaken place.So, needless to say, that I am not only foolish but
…Matt POV…If I thought that this day could not get any worse, some asshole has just struck me against the head. I can only think of one man, and god, James, better hope that I never get loose.But as I look next to me, in a bundle on the floor completely covered in the mud, is Isabella lying in complete stillness. So with a pounding head, I push myself off the floor to go over to her."Isabella, wake up."But there is no answer. Once again, I pull at her shoulder."Isabella, wake up."Still no response."God, Isabella, fucking wake up."The dread sinks over my body, has that goddamn monster killed her. But then I hear a loud gasp and a struggle for her to catch her breath."Fuck, Isabella, I thought you were…""Damn, Matty, I nearly thought I was.""What the hell is going on here?""Matty, I think that Clay is in danger."With that, a suffocating silence fills every corne
"What are you doing here?"But then as if with utmost flawlessness, the real click clack that I was waiting for makes her grand entrance. She does come dressed for the part and taken by her tight black body suit. I would be foolish if I for one second believe that she comes in here peace. It seems the very thing I truly expected her to have forgotten by now, has now most certainly snuck up, and as they would say, it has come to bite me in the ass.But I must say I am still very intrigued."What are you doing here?"Yet she does not say a word."Have you gone death? What are you doing here?""I do request that you shall show me some respect. After all, I am the one that have you tied up."But then next, there is a face that steps out from behind her, a face that I thought I would never see. "Oaky, now what the fuck are you doing here."I truly belief that my near death experience has in deed affected my vision. This pathetic lit
…Matty POV…A part of me is questioning if I truly did hear the words that are coming from the direction in front of me. If there are ever the most terrifying words that one has spoken, then I a sure that this will be it. I do wish that he did not just say that, for I am more afraid of Clayton's life than mine.No, as I stare into the godawful face of James, the other man has not yet made his appearance. Well, this shall not happen today. I shall not allow to be taken and overpowered by two men that clearly think that they are playing god.Now, as I watch Isabella's face, I see the terror creep over her face as the other man starts to speak. If there is ever the most terrifying look that words can not speak then that is what is on her face. But as this man steps forward, I can see the utmost expression of joy on his godawful face."Mark," I hear her gasp as she nearly trembles over in tears. "What are you doing here?""Next time, get