Chapter two.

Shrill ringing wakes me the next morning and after trying to silence the sound, I accidentally answer the telephone, somehow putting it on speakerphone and Rob's voice reverberates through my brain.

"Becky, we need to talk about this. I want to come home and have an adult discussion without you shouting or throwing things like a child, do you think you can manage that?" 

"What the actual fuck sort of an apology is that?" I wince as Jacqui's croaky voice screeches from the other side of the bed. "Are you kidding me right now? You cheat on her and then ask her if she can behave like an adult? Go fuck yourself or your new child bride."

"Morning Jacqui, I should have expected you to be there. I assume you both got stupidly drunk and that then answers my question. I'll ask Sam to pop round and pick up some things for me. Do you think you can manage to at least put a bag together for me, so he doesn't have to waste too much time?" I never realised how arrogant he was before, or how much of a dick he sounded.

"Sure, get him to pop around at lunchtime and it'll all be ready for you." I say sweetly, waving my hand at Jacqui who's glaring at me.

"Thank you, I'll speak to you soon darling." Rob coos down the phone before hanging up and I nearly vomit. Any residual guilt I may have had about sleeping with that other guy last night is gone now, it's like I've finally woken up and seen him for what he is.

"What the fuck, Rebecca Lea?" She snaps, using my full and middle name to show she's beyond furious, but I just smile as I struggle out of bed.

"We need to go shopping." I tell her, grabbing my towel and heading for the shower. She frowns at me, but, sensing I have a plan, she scrambles out of bed to get ready.

I had planned not to tell her what I was up to until I realised I had no idea where to buy clothing dye from, so we stopped off for breakfast while we searched online.

We ended up wandering around Wilkinsons like two criminals casing the joint, choosing vibrant pink dye and buying ten boxes, just to be sure the colour was strong enough.

As soon as we get back to my house, we set to work, Jacqui reading the instructions while I gather up all of his light coloured underpants, socks and shirts, both work and personal, filling the washing machine with a mixture just in case it's not finished in time.

"Is this petty and immature?" I ask Jacqui as we watch the clothes very quickly start to turn pink.

"Yes and he deserves this and more." She grins back at me. "Coffee while we wait?"

By the time the doorbell rings, we've done two loads and a third one is halfway through, the previous loads having been hung up to dry outside and I'm very lucky that it's a beautiful sunny day because they're almost dry.

"Hey, Bex, how are you doing?" Sam pulls me into a hug the moment he steps through the door. "For what it's worth I think Rob's been a dick, you don't deserve this."

"Thanks Sam, I'm just washing one last load, do you want a drink while you wait?" I ask, praying he doesn't look out of the window to see the pink washing swaying in the breeze.

"Uh, sure. Um… Becky, what happened to the walls?" I look up and burst out laughing, surprising him and he looks at me like I've gone a little insane.

"So Jacqui and I got a little drunk last night and I decided to do something about the magnolia I've always hated." He cocks an eyebrow, looking around him at the mess we've made and I can't help another giggle escaping. "We're fixing it this weekend."

"Do you need a hand?" He asks, picking at a particularly thick splatter of yellow paint with his fingernail.

"Nah, it's fine, don't worry." The washing machine gives a final vibration and shuts off. "Ok, let me put that on the line for a bit so it dries. Jacqui

can you come and make tea for Sam while I finish the washing please?"

"Oh my god. Hello." Jacqui actually steps back when she sees Sam, her eyes widening as she mouths 'wow' at me. "You do not look like you'd be Rob's brother."

"Be right back." I giggle nervously as I try to figure out how to get the washing past him without him seeing it.

"Oh my god, in all the years that we have been friends, how have you not mentioned that Rob's brother looked like that?" Jacqui sprints up behind me as I hang out the washing.

"I never thought about it." I lie, I have thought about him, a lot over the years, he's beautiful but I always felt like admitting it out loud would have been hurtful to Rob.

"How could you not? Jesus Christ Bex, he's that beautiful he'd turn a gay woman straight and a straight man gay." She gushes. "Why on earth would you have settled for Rob when there was a Sam in the same house?"

"Ok, calm down." I chuckle, spinning the washing line to the wettest washing is directly in the sun. "It's not all about looks. Rob was sweet, dependable, reliable…"

"Boring you mean." Jacqui interrupts and I laugh, shaking my head at her.

"Ok, yes, boring. Sam's the opposite, he's kind, but he's just as likely to turn up at your house in the middle of the night uninvited as he is to call you up and postpone plans because he's made an impromptu visit to France. He actually did that once, he was meant to be coming over and he rang from the ferry, Rob was furious." When I turn back to look at her, she's grinning maniacally and I've known her long enough to know that's not a good thing.

"You should fuck him." She declares, clapping her hands together excitedly. "I'm going to go out so you can go in there and fuck Sam."

"I am not going to fuck Sam." I hiss, looking around in case he somehow appears and hears us.

"Yes you are, I'm adding it to the list. This could be the best thing, not only do you get to fuck the most beautiful guy I've ever seen in real life, but it's the most perfect revenge on Mr boring McSexfailure." I pick up the basket and walk away from her, back towards the house and she hurries after me. "Come on, Becky, you can do this."

"Nope. End of discussion." I drop the basket down and wander through to the sitting room where Sam is happily munching through a packet of biscuits while watching TV.

"Fuck Sam, Fuck Sam, Fuck Sam." Jacqui chants quietly but directly in my ear until I shove her away from me and Sam looks up.

"Nearly done?" He asks, offering me my own biscuits.

"Not yet, have you had lunch?" Jacqui asks him and when he shakes his head, she grins. "Can you look after Becky for me while I go get us all something? I won't be long, have a drink or something while you wait."

Running out to the kitchen, she comes back with a six pack of lager, placing it on the table and wiggling my keys in her hand to show me she's got them to get back in.

"She's a bit of a weird one, eh?" Sam laughs, picking up one of the lagers and pulling the tab. "I'm ok to drink this right? There's nothing in it? I feel like something's going on and I'm not sure if I should be worried or not."

"Yeah, you're fine, honestly. She's angry at Rob but the only way she'd involve you is thinking I should sleep with you to get back at Rob." I hadn't meant to admit that and I can feel my cheeks burning, so I swiftly follow it up with. "So you're safe, Rob she'd put something in the drink, but you'll be ok."

"Good to know." He takes a long drink and I can't help watching his Adam's apple bob up and down, I blame Jacqui entirely for putting any sort of inappropriate thoughts in my head, but while I'm staring, I realise Sam's now watching me. "So she reckons we should fuck to get back at Rob for fucking the bimbo at his work then?"

"Uh huh." I roll my eyes, desperately trying to think of somewhere else to take the conversation.

"And what do you think about that idea?" I swear to God his voice has dropped an octave lower and now Jacqui's idea isn't seeming so weird, but no! I can't.

"I think she's officially lost the plot." I snort, literally snort, as I fake laugh and I'm fairly certain my cheeks couldn't get any redder.

"Harsh, I'm not that bad, am I?" He teases, leaning over to nudge me with the back of his hand.

"Oh yeah, course, you might as well rename yourself Quasimodo." I laugh for real this time, but stop short when I realise he's still leaning towards me and our faces are inches apart.

I couldn't tell you who closes the gap, but one second I'm laughing at the idiocy of the idea and the next we're kissing. Not gently kissing either, he's biting my lip, my tongue is trying to get in his mouth and any second now I'm sure I'm going to be straddling him on the sofa.

"Sorry, sorry, we can't." I pull back, thinking how much sexier his lips look now I've kissed them.

"Pretty sure we just did." Sam says and I can't help but notice his hands are still on my back, putting just the slightest bit of pressure to get me to lean forwards into him again.

"No." I laugh, extricating myself from his grip before temptation takes over again. "What I mean is, we shouldn't. He's your brother, it would wreck your relationship with him. I can't be the one to do that."

"You're a good girl, Bex." He leans forward, cupping my cheek in his hand and dissolving what little resolve I'm holding on to. "He never deserved you before and he sure as shit doesn't deserve you now. Let's go get his clothes before I say fuck it and risk him hating me."

"O… K." I swallow hard. Sam must be exuding some sort of weird pheromone or something because I'm finding him fairly irresistible now. I'd even forgotten what we did to Rob's clothing until Sam breaks out in deep, uproarious laughter.

"I cannot wait to see his face when he pulls these out. I'll take a picture and send it across to you." He starts to gather the clothes up, folding them neatly into a carrier bag and then winks at me, making my stomach do somersaults. "I'll text you in a bit."

With a kiss to the cheek, he hops into his car and drives off, leaving me standing there, staring in the direction he left and reminding myself that I did the right thing when I stopped us from progressing past a kiss.

"So… what happened?" Jacqui calls when she gets back three hours later and I'm sitting on my sofa watching a film.

"He laughed when he saw the clothes, said he'd send a picture but I've not heard anything yet." I reply, wanting to keep the kiss to myself.

"Well, that's not exactly what I meant but it'll do I guess." She flops down beside me, dropping a pizza box between us and taking a slice for herself. 

We've almost finished the film when the first text comes through, a series of picture messages from Sam that shows Rob in a fit of rage, looking at one shirt then pulling them all out before throwing them back in the bag and storming out.

Sam: I wish I could have video'd it, he's going fucking apeshit xxx

Sam: Don't feel bad, he deserves that and much, much more. The more I think about it, the more I'm thinking your friend might have been right ;) xxx

Becky: You're only saying that because you enjoy the fallout. It wouldn't be right. Thanks for the pictures though. Sorry you've got to get the earful. x

My phone pings again and expecting it to be Sam, I immediately swipe it open, only to be presented by a furious text from Rob.

Rob: I cannot believe you did that Rebecca. I genuinely thought you could be mature about this and we could discuss everything, but clearly not. I'll be sending you the bill for the replacements. Robert.

"Send away Robert, we won't be paying them." Jacqui scoffs, crossing her arms over her chest.

"We?" I laugh, nudging her with my elbow.

"Yeah we. It's you and me now baby, I might even move into the guest room. We could live like Rachel and Monica and have the best single life going." She grins, both of us jumping when we hear a knock at the door.

Expecting it to be Rob, we both sneak to the window and peer out, only to see Sam standing there looking back at us as if he knew what we would do. He grins and waves at us to open up, and as soon as he steps inside, Jacqui tells me she's going home and will call me tomorrow.

Jacqui: Please fuck Sam, do it for me. Then tell me all about it. Xxx