Tightrope

6. Nadia 

“Take the trash out with Afsan,” Suzana instructed, before gliding away.

A trail of scullery maids followed soon after, quick to listen to her rushed instructions. The head maid was definitely the best for her job. Prim and proper, she was everything Madame Thelowar should’ve been.

Enough of that. I needed to know about what’s in store for me come Friday. I asked Afsan about the gathering. Asking the maids, were out of the question right now.

“So, the servants have a duty this time around?” I ask.

His response was curt. “Apparently.”

We loaded the sacks into the metal crate, rusting at its side. I banged the rusted metal to attract the attention of the man upfront. It took a second for me to see him amidst the flurry of flies. After seeing him nod, I relaxed. He flicked the cigarette away before taking the trash away on his run-down bike, leaving a buzz of flies scurrying after him. I swatted at the imbeciles and took cover under the roof. To my surprise, Afsan was waiting there struggling to light his cigar. Or to ask me about something. 

“I heard some royal guests were gonna attend the gathering,” he said conversationally. 

I didn't respond. How could I? The conversation with Master Thelowar replayed in my head. I felt as if a cold grip had taken hold of my spine. Nadia, get used to hearing about the royals you dumbass. 

"Yeah? Where'd you hear?" I asked.

At his fumbling mess, my impatience rose. Will you make me wait my entire life?  I took his damned lighter and help him light his cigar. In embarrassment, he looked away before muttering a thank you. I only nodded, waiting for him to answer my question. 

“One of 'em maids were talking about it," he said after a beat.  

He took a long drag of his cigar, exhaling the smoke. His tone told me that wasn't all he heard. 

"Fuckin’ leeches. Each time they come by, they always ask for that commission money. Especially those mages. They're disgusting people, I’m telling you.”

Ah. I get why he looks so fazed. I nodded. A lot of the lower classes experienced the worst of the magic system. I wonder why...

There were different factions for mages. The lower the levels, the weaker the power, and the lesser security placed on them. Therefore... they had increased chances of getting away with stuff. But to attend a party of this scale? They most likely won't attend. 

“Well, there's a higher chance the lower levels won't attend,” I assured him. 

Afsan shrugged, but I can still see the shadow of unease shrouded in his face. 

“This is our life. We’ve become people helping others live out their dreams.”

The honesty was surprising. I didn’t expect him to say something like that, but it was true. We have no life. Servants will continue to suffer under the current rule. In one way or another, the empire structured the lower classes to be confined to this continuous cycle of the "master and servant" relationship system. One to be used, and one to gain, I thought angrily. 

A girl calls out to Afsan, and he waves at me before leaving.

"Dreams are useless anyway," I said under my breath. 

I wiped the sweat off my brow as I felt the weather change to a cool breeze. 

Great, it’s night already. I rolled my eyes hopping down the flight of stairs.

“If I see one bandit, it’s on sight,” I said, grimly. 

I slipped my hood on as I set off at a run, looking for a hitchhike back home.

......

The wind had calmed, contrary to how it had been in the morning. Jogging with the light breeze on your face definitely felt nicer at night.

Content with the atmosphere of the city, I turned my head to a group of people laughing, drunk off of booze. They sluggishly danced to the distorted song booming through a set of cracked speakers. I snorted. The people of Karandish only knew how to party until late at night. It was no surprise to see the partygoers still loitering around. No complaints from my side, though. 

“Ta-eal! Ta-eal!” I heard a young boy holler.

Come, come. The lower classes used the dialect of the past to this day. A grin crept onto my face as I made my way towards them, glad they seemed friendly enough to accept more riders. I slapped a roughed-up bill into the picketer’s palm and slid onto the open ledge.  

The carpoolers spared a fleeting glance at me before reaching to adjust the slabs of wood to fit in more people. 

“Aish-.” I felt a shard of wood poke me hard.

I rubbed the spot as I turned my head to agitated murmurs. The cause of it being an aunty. She lifted her maxi dress as she cut the line to board the truck.

“Lord, have mercy.” She groaned before planting herself in between two young boys, shifting all the material in the truck to a mess.

The passengers looked at her with irritation as they suffocated under the pressure. 

“Maam-.” The curly-headed boy coughed out. 

A stick pressed against his neck, and I winced at the number of splinters he’d get.

The older lady paid no heed and crossed her arms against her chest as if in defiance. She literally could’ve waited for the others to board before she did. 

We all sighed in defeat and ignored the pain in the ass in our presence. As if we were getting punished for our thoughts, a jab from the wood was enough to have us groaning in pain.

“Heh.” The plump lady snorted before closing her eyes. 

“Ugh, kill me already,” someone muttered, and I couldn’t agree more. 

As the car geared into motion, I felt the soft humming of the lady in front slowly drive me into a daze. I struggled to keep my eyes open as the car rocked me into a daze.

......

“You stupid girl! Not like that!”

My grandmother whacked me on the head with her rolled-up newspaper as I made the same mistake again.

“Oof, Nanu, this is so damn hard! Who even learns how to balance like this?” I rubbed my head as I winced in pain.

My feet developed bruises as I tried, in vain, to keep my balance on the tightrope. I grit my teeth and stomped on the spot. The damned rope was very tempting to rip right now.

I couldn’t copy how she showed it to me. Impatience filled her movements as she watched me fail every two seconds.

“You fool! How will you be careful if you keep stumbling like a bumbling toad!” My grandmother shouted from the kitchen.

I stretched out my sore muscles, unwilling to go on.

It was hard to believe how much pressure she put on me, especially as a kid. I was gifted with magic, with intelligence (maybe not much), yet I was already better than others my age. Sure, some people could use mana, some also had mighty strength.

But, my gift was special.

My grandmother wouldn’t tell me what my gift was. Every time I asked, she’d dismiss me, saying I should cultivate my skills before getting ahead of myself. My curiosity is the reason I got stuck known as the troublemaker. My grandmother told me my mother already felt what a pain in the ass I would be when I grew up. I rolled my eyes at hearing that. I’m like the best kid around. Heh- My old grannie was wrong. 

I sighed, plopping onto the ground, squinting against the bright rays from above. Something came into view to block the glaring light. The smell of spices let me know it was my Nanu. I closed my eyes, not wanting to look at her face.

“Tsk, when will she learn.” I imagined her disappointment and my heart ached. 

I smiled despite the pain. She looked funny when she got mad. I heard her soft footsteps fade away and the rustle of a movement in the distance.

“Get up.” She nudged me with her toe, and I sat up begrudgingly.

“Get up.” Nanu motioned at me to stand up, throwing her shawl at my head. “And hold that.”

I obediently followed her orders and observed her. Who knew when the sandal was gonna come flying.

She felt the tightrope and tugged at it lightly, her back now facing me. Her coiled dark hair fell to the back of her knees, ribbons entwined, glowing as if sensing her mana presence. She had the resemblance of any other grandma, but she had a strength that overcame even the strongest soldier in the entire empire.

Her green eyes blazed fiercely with control as she hopped onto the tightrope. She tested her weight, moving her arms in the air as if trying to get a feel of the air. It was a dance akin to moving in water, a slow, steady pace that sent hearts into a frenzy but calmed the eyes. Maybe it also made me fall asleep too, but I won’t tell her that.

I lost my train of thought in following her pace. 

She hopped gently from one end of the rope to the other, gliding through the wind, balancing her mana and controlling her centre. She had her eyes closed but smirked as she sensed me struck in awe.

“I like this sound,” Nanu hummed. 

“Hm, what sound? I can’t hear anything.”

She glanced at me from the side of her eyes. It took me some time before I realized. 

“Woooow, you don’t like it when I talk, I see.”

She chuckled, and I folded my arms, turning away from her. Of course, she didn’t care.

It didn’t take her long to lose herself in her world. Of mana. Of the spirits of the air. I saw a glimpse of a passing cloud of air. It looked like a man, now that I think of it. The cloud sputtered on her, covering her in a glittery mosaic of leaves and shiny… stuff.

Her dress flowed in the air and landed gracefully at her ankles. I yearned to be like her. Listening and dancing to the song of the wind. Synchronizing myself to every sway in the leaves. In these few moments where she showed me her skills, I saw my grandmother as the younger version of herself.

Her beautiful eyes struck intensely with her milky brown skin as the bangles on her arms jingled and added their musical beat to the dance. Compared to my flip-flop back cracking dance, I wanted to be like this so much. 

At the end of her dance, I sat there quietly but felt more determined than ever. Ignoring the blistering pain in my feet, I stood up instantly and looked at her in admiration.

“NANUUUUUUUU! That was amazing! Why don’t you ever dance like this for me, huh!” I hugged her and buried my face in her jiggly belly.

She laughed, warmth spreading across her gestures as she raised my face.

“My babu, this dance is difficult, and it’s not for the weak. It’s for those who can focus on their core.” She poked my belly, making me smile.

“Many can’t guide mana as best as we can, and that is because we were born from a lineage of warriors who used mana, intelligence, power, wisdom and strength as their powerhouses. We’ve all started with these foundations. Controlling our thoughts and emotions, we must suppress our powers. It’s all about how well you can revolve yourself around your central powers. Once you pass that damned stage, we will finally get to the wielding and stuff. But focus on what I am teaching you. Soon enough, your muscles will naturally memorize the movements, so don’t worry, my Jaan.”

I listened to her beating heart, trying to digest what she told me. She kissed the top of my head lightly before releasing me to go back to her duties. I ran my fingers across the rope and tried convincing myself. I could do it.

I pounced on that tightrope more determined than before.

......