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Chapter 23 (ii)
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2024-10-29 19:42:56The movement at the corner of my eye brought my attention to Matt as he descended the stairs. Our eyes met and I could see he meant to say something, but his lips never parted. He appeared confused and were I a few brain cells shorter, I may have even thought there was remorse mixed in.
It was his way. Whenever confronted with the consequences of his actions, it always seemed that those very consequences caught him off guard. Matthew lived in an ideal world where he could do what he wanted, whenever he wanted and however, he wanted absent any impact on anyone outside of himself. He’d never been raised to consider anyone outside of himself in any meaningful way and never failed to be taken aback when faced with the victims and the pain they felt at his hands.
I’d done my part in raising such a monster. When we were younger, I would comfort him in his confusion and assure him it wasn’t his fault. Back then, I would do anything to make my little brother smile again—anyt
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The Girl with the Masks and The Student Body President Chapter 23 (iii)
His words faded into the background, appearing as little more than garbled mutterings too far away for me to hear as my eyes scanned document after document. Scepticism gave way to uncertainty then chagrin as the truth laid itself out before me. There were documents that dated back to as early as my 7th birthday…the year after he’d left. Many were stamped, some contained stains and other evidence of their paper aging. There were motions to move forward with hearings and other motions to suspend stemming from ‘an inability to locate mother and children’. My head swung from the revelation, my mind scrambling to make sense of the complicated court jargon that sought to further scramble my thoughts. “I’ve already got schools lined up for you and your brother. I—I know about Emily, too. She can come with us, of course, there’s no question about that. I started looking for daycares but wanted you having a final say in where she spends her
The Girl with the Masks and The Student Body President Chapter 24 (i)
The incessant ringing in my ear drowned out the sounds of the street. The neighbours I seldom saw came pouring out of their homes with expressions of horror and disbelief. It was the sort of scene that would rattle any self-respecting suburban who’d managed to convince themself the real world and life weren’t as scary as those outside their bubbles realised it to be.As if waiting in the wing for her cue, my mother yanked the front door open and came screaming toward the scene. Her grief was so great that she tried to throw herself at the still-burning car and had to be pulled forcefully away by our neighbour, Mr. Robinson. His sweet wife, meanwhile, patted her comfortingly on the back and tried to assure her that everything would be okay while offering up her deepest condolences.People moved around me, some trying to put out the fire, others trying to figure out what caused it. Someone…a faint voice in the background was speaking with the fire department while anothe
The Girl with the Masks and The Student Body President Chapter 24 (ii)
“The car wouldn’t start. Next thing I know, he’s got the hood thrown up and he’s tinkering with something. I’ve warned him for years he’s not the mechanic he likes to think he is, but he wouldn’t…he wouldn’t…” Her words teetered off as she began her waterworks anew. “I’m sorry, I can’t—I’m sorry.”“It’s alright; thank you, ma’am.” He was still scribbling down her lies, oblivious to the tainted nature of her testimony. “We’re just finishing up with your kids. Do you have anyone who could watch them while we get the scene processed and have a word with you down at the station? Shouldn’t take more than a few hours and they shouldn’t have to see their father when we get him out.”“I…of course,” she said, earnest in her response. She gave the air of a cooperative woman, ready and eager to please. “My mother lives in the town over; I don’t think she’ll mind me dropping them off before I head down to the station…”“Anyone’s fine. Have her come here. Won’t take much lon
The Girl with the Masks and The Student Body President Chapter 24 (iii)
“You know I had to do it, right?” she said, leading him over to the couch to have a seat. He was pale and still shook though less noticeably. Matthew’s mind had been pushed into overdrive as it tried to rationalise all he’d seen and fit it into the world he thought he’d always known. “He was going to take Kai…he was going to take you. We’re family; we have to stay together. You know that, right?”Her voice was soft as silk, inviting him to retain his trust in her. It offered reason in the midst of the chaos and sought to assure him that everything that had happened was for the greater good of our little family.He desperately wanted to believe that. “He…was going to take Kai?”“Yes, but I’d never let that happen—to either of you.” She spared a glance in my direction, one filled with purpose and the direct message that escape wouldn’t ever be so easy. Her actions were as much to finally rid herself of the only man capable of playing with her emotions as they were
The Girl with the Masks and The Student Body President Chapter 24 (iv)
Back in my room, I found my iPod laid on the right side of my bed. I slammed the door shut then ran over to grab it, marvelling at the device I’d been so sure I would never see again. I thought back to my little brother and the turmoil that must have plagued his mind enough for him to extend this act of mercy. The events of the day had shaken him, turning his left into right and vice versa. I wouldn’t look too deeply into his actions, choosing instead to be grateful his anguished thoughts had led to the return of the only thing I had.I hit the power button and saw at once that it was fully charged. The faintest wisps of a smile spread across my lips and my brother elevated himself in my esteem.A half hour later, the phone rang. I snatched it from the hook with an unusual degree of anticipation. So much had happened since Jayden dropped me back at Lilia’s and he was the only one I knew I could share it all with.“Hello?”“Is this Kai?”It wasn’t h
The Girl with the Masks and The Student Body President Chapter 25 (i)
The next morning, I rose before my alarm. The adrenaline coursing through me at the thought of the performance I would put on left me too anxious for any meaningful rest and caused nothing but tossing and turning the night before. There was a part of me that was relieved to greet the day if only because it meant I would no longer be left to wallow for hours with thoughts I would sooner forget.They would talk about it; it was invariably the course things took no matter where I transferred. There would even be those who were bold enough to walk up to me, shamelessly seeking clarification or further provocation. Rationality dictated that I ignore them and wait to be transferred again but experience reminded me it would make little difference. My peers had always had overly active imaginations. They needed little help from me to flesh out the details of their fantasies concerning the many lives they had convinced themselves I lived.It was only 5:50 in the morning but I&r
The Girl with the Masks and The Student Body President Chapter 25 (ii)
At the other end, I found Madelyn. She stood by Hayley and a girl from our French class. Our eyes locked for a second or two before she turned to continue the conversation she’d been having.It had begun, and I would need courage to see me through the day.I thought of Emi and the mother I wanted to be for her sake. It was only the beginning; life would be harder. She was still young, but there was no telling what lay ahead for her when she gained her own classmates and started accumulating her own experiences. If I couldn’t withstand the harsh words spoken about me in ignorance by my peers, how would I help her through her own struggles? How would I lift my head proudly and guide her through the bad feelings if I couldn’t escape my own?I would have to be the person she would one day look up to and that started with making my way to my locker without allowing the piercing stares to crawl too deeply under my skin.First would be math, th
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“Yeah. We figure the three of us could get better…acquainted.” He took a step forward, forcing me to move back until I met the wall and could go no further. With nowhere to run, my gaze was forced to the pair whose lips had spread into satisfied smirks. They knew they had me cornered and had rightly assumed no one would come looking for me. Screaming, while useful, would draw unwanted attention and I’d garnered enough of that on my own.Dale, the other boy, reached a hand over to caress my cheek. It was an action that caused my heart to hammer erratically inside my chest. My airway began to constrict as visions of my past transgressors and their hungry hands flooded my mind. It wasn’t only the two who stood before me, but every boy I’d ever had the displeasure of meeting. They’d managed to find me, transcending time and space to assault me once more.I shoved his hand away. “I don’t want to acquaint myself with eit
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The Girl with the Masks and The Student Body President Chapter 37 (ii)
“There’s…there’s something I need to tell you.” I only needed the courage to find the words.Jayden’s brows creased as he took me in. “What is it…?”“You’ll be angry.”“I won’t.”“You can’t promise that; you don’t even know what it is…”“And you can’t be sure I will be until you’ve told me and given me a chance to react.”We sat at a silent stalemate as several minutes trickled by. I knew he was patiently waiting for whatever bad news I would spring, and I knew it would hurt him. The fear I harboured had nothing to do with ending the new fairytale I’d taken on and everything to do with the hesitation I felt following everything he’d done for me and now my brother.He didn’t deserve what I’d done, and it had been all for naught. I never got pregnant and didn’t h
The Girl with the Masks and The Student Body President Chapter 37 (i)
Three weeks later, my brother and I dutifully attended our mother’s funeral. There were only a handful of people in attendance and even then, they were mostly family. The genuine friends my mother had made were no more than a handful and only one of them shed any tears.Aunt Rebecca was the only immediate family member to cry with even Nana maintaining a wall of stoicism while the pastor carried on with his final sermon. I didn’t hear most of his words. My eyes locked on the casket waiting to be lowered with a detached sense of disbelief. At any moment, it would open, and my mother would come out barking her laughter at all the fools who’d thought a single bullet would be enough to keep her from her children. She would hug Matt and promise she would never leave him then offer me a plastic smile as she assured me we would talk about it all when we got home.I’d spent the better part of the earlier service with my eyes fixed on the woman while the
The Girl with the Masks and The Student Body President Chapter 36 (v)
It was another seven minutes before the paramedics arrived and when they did, there was a race against time to get me stable. I’d already lost too much blood and kept slipping in and out of consciousness. I learned later that the police had also been called but in the haze I’d fallen into, I couldn’t say when they arrived on our usually quiet street.I was loaded into the ambulance with my brother and an officer accompanying us. It was Detective Charles, the man who’d promised my mother he would find out the truth about her ex-husband’s sudden, tragic death. He didn’t know what to make of the scene he’d come onto but knew there was a deep well that buried secrets so dark that two children had no business holding onto them.Conversations carried on around me, but they were too muffled by my fading consciousness for me to hear. The next time I awoke, I was on a hospital bed with my brother asleep on the chair that sat in the corn
The Girl with the Masks and The Student Body President Chapter 36 (iv)
“No!” I answered quickly. I hurried to hold the note I’d written up for her to see but she gave it only the shortest of cursory glances before pulling back then throwing her entire weight into the smack she landed on my cheek. The force sent me toppling to the ground faster than I could right myself and by then, she’d begun kicking.“I bet you think you’ve found something, huh? HUH? Think you’ve got the upper hand now; that you can blackmail me because of what you’ve seen? Do you know who I am, little girl? Don’t you know that I will kill you?”I shook my head frantically as I curled into a protective ball. “I didn’t—I didn’t see anything, I swear!”“Don’t fucking lie to me!” Her next kick landed in my face, causing blood to gush from my nose.“I won’t say anything; I won’t, I promise!”“I shoul
The Girl with the Masks and The Student Body President Chapter 36 (iii)
I set to decline Adam's offer but, in a flash, he was on his feet pulling on his own pants. “The bus might be a while. I don’t want you standing out by the bus stop waiting for however long.” He pulled for his shirt and slipped it on. “You hungry? We can hit up a drive-thru on the way.”The rumbling of my stomach betrayed any answer I could’ve given. Adam nodded his understanding then led the way from the house. He got me my usual off the menu then dropped me off in front of my house.Adam had tried to fill the ride with small talk, in what appeared on the surface to be a sincere interest in catching up, but I’d already begun to shut down. I didn’t want to talk. I didn’t want to feel, to see, to be.“Hey,” he said as I set to walk away from his car. “Remember what I said, alright? I’m here for you.”I nodded, seeing no need to argue and not wanting to prolong the conversat
The Girl with the Masks and The Student Body President Chapter 36 (ii)
I swallowed my pride, understanding the role I would have to play. It wasn’t an unfamiliar one and would require no great effort for me to slip into. I dropped the pitch of my voice, forcing it into a sultry invitation I knew he wouldn’t refuse.“Your pay’s built into this favour.” I hated myself.Adam pulled away to look at me, his eyes glistening hungrily. “I’m listening.”I took a deep breath to steady myself. “Emily’s…dead.”“Who?”A surge of hot anger rose in me at his ignorance, but I was forced to swallow it. Adam’s lack of knowledge was in large part my fault. I’d never allowed him to meet her, nor had I ever told him anything about her. She may as well had been a stranger to him—as she truly was—and in that moment, I realised the small stake he had in the decision I’d made…how…insignificant my plight was been for
The Girl with the Masks and The Student Body President Chapter 36 (i)
“Hey, Kai.” Madelyn stopped me on my way down the hall. “Wait up.”Reluctantly, I brought my feet to a halt then offered her a forced smile. “Hey.”She began rummaging through her bag as she drew closer before pulling out a pastel pink toddler shirt with a crown printed on the front. Madelyn extended it to me with a sheepish smile. “I saw this when my mom took me shopping and I thought…you know…it’d look really cute on your daughter. It’s probably a little big; we didn’t know her size, but she’ll grow into it, right?”I didn’t think I had any heart left until I felt another piece of it break off. She wasn’t wrong, Emily would have looked amazing in it, but she would never have a chance to grow into it, nor would she ever wear it.The strained smile I’d been forcing dissolved. A lump lodged itself into the back of my throat requiring me to take several m
The Girl with the Masks and The Student Body President Chapter 35 (iii)
I considered writing him a note asking that he take care of them, but much like everything else, it didn’t matter. What would I care if he ripped through my room like the Tasmanian Devil after I was gone?The air inside my mother’s room was still. It was the first I’d been in there—the first I’d been in any of her rooms since my father left. Matt was welcome to cuddle and watch movies from time to time, but never me. There was an air of reverence that came with the subtle warning I shouldn’t have been there. I was walking on holy ground as a tainted sinner. Such a transgression would normally fill me with fear but that particular feeling couldn’t have been further away.I took the time to sweep my eyes across my mother’s room. How foreign it seemed, as if I’d been transported to another world. Nothing was out of place and the bed had been well-made. The blinds were half open, allowing light into the room while blott
The Girl with the Masks and The Student Body President Chapter 35 (ii)
Uncomfortable and uncertain, the nurse returned to her desk. Seeing her whisper about me with her colleagues brought the laughter to the next level. My insides hurt from how hard I laughed, and I could feel a pressure building inside my head, but even then…I couldn’t stop laughing.Those around me grew unsettled by the persistent nature of my unprovoked laughter. One by one, they rose from the chairs closest to me and made their way to stand at the wall at the opposite end of the waiting room or by the nurse’s desk.Their evasion tickled my insides until they screamed. Those people had nothing to fear; I wasn’t the murderer.By the time I was allowed to see Jayden, the laughter had died. It was replaced by a subdued silence that stood in stark contrast to the boisterous half-cackle half-wail I’d carried on with earlier.I didn’t have the energy for it…didn’t have the energy for anything. I’d been dra
