45: Nightmare

Turquoise.

It's all I see at first when I first open my eyes. My heart's beating uncontrollably. I climb out of bed and rush to the bathroom. I think of splashing water in my face, but I change my mind and take a cold shower instead.

Last night's events affected me more than I expected. Damien truly wasn't himself. Almost as if someone—or something—took over his body. The alcohol played a role, of course. I can't stop thinking about what happened. I turned and twisted in bed before I fell asleep just processing everything, hence the dream. I haven't had a dream like that in a long time, since high school I think. When I close my eyes, I can still feel his lips on mine. The fact that my entire being is up in flames is the most degrading part for me. I'm too old for this. I can't believe that my subconscious would trick me like this.

The cold shower helped.

I turn the tap off and pad into the bedroom. I wrap my towel around my body and dry myself quickly. It's still early, but I want