We were eating at his dining table. We didn't have the energy to cook so we just ordered takeouts again. I think we've exhausted all our energy in the bathroom. God. Flint was just eating his tacos while talking about his plans for his thesis; while I just stayed silent, listening to him talk about it, and thinking about what he said to me earlier. He just said 'I love you'. He loves me. But I don't know if I should believe him because for all I know, he might have just said it because we were having sex and because he was in that magical moment and it was making his mind cloudy. Because at that moment, my mind was cloudy. So how would I know if he's telling the truth? 'I love you's' these days has become empty phrases to some. For me, it's not something you can just tell anyone without actually feeling it. If I ever say I love someone, that's because I love that someone. Not because that someone was giving me pleasure. Not because someone made my legs shake. "I'm sorry for grumb
Taylor and I have a lot to share with each other. But before that, we decided to order some food and have it delivered to the dorm. Food tastes even better when you're talking about stuff... interesting stuff.We ordered pizza and cola. We even wanted to drink some beer but we couldn't because it's not allowed. Maybe when we transfer to a different apartment, then we'll even stock some.Like usual, we set our carpet in the middle of our open area and sat there like we're having a picnic. I was trying so hard not to ask or say anything else before the food came. We need to stuff our mouths with food first before anything else.When we were informed the delivery was already outside, we went downstairs together. I really can't wait for our talk to begin. Until now, I can't believe she and Sean finally hooked up. Although I was itching to ask if they're together now, or if they have confessed to each other that they like each other. I haven't told her yet what's going on between Flint and
For a moment, I thought my body stopped functioning. I didn't know what to do, didn't know what's going on. I just know that Dad's in the hospital and it's not fine. He got into an accident and that will never be fine."Jas? What happened?" Taylor asked. She stood up and went to me to inspect my face. "Oh my god, what happened?" She asked again when she saw me crying."Dad's in the hospital," I managed to say, but it was almost a whisper. I heard Taylor gasp.Telling it to people and seeing their reaction just confirmed my thought that this is real, that this is happening."Oh my god, I'm so sorry," I heard her say. She hugged me and I let her as I continued to cry. "Do you want to go? I can drive.""Is it okay?" I asked. I feel bad that I have to trouble her to drive for me, but I guess I don't have any choice. I could call Flint but I don't think it's okay for him to drive me to the hospital. I'm not yet ready to tell it to my family, especially at a time like this."Of course. Let
"Hey," I said as I answered Flint's call. I'm outside our room, yet I'm still whispering. I was just being cautious. I feel like Mom's reading something into this when she saw that Flint's calling me. Dad's still unconscious so I don't think it was the right time to break it to her."I thought you're already sleeping. I just called to check," he replied. I could feel him moving around his apartment. He's probably doing some late-night tasks."No, I'm not," I said. I saw a bench a few meters away from me so I started walking towards it so I could take a seat. "I'm at the hospital.""What? Why? Are you okay? Something happened?" He asked. There was a rush in his tone and I liked hearing his concern. Now I'm just too tired, from the drive here and the rush that I was feeling from hearing the horrible news."It's Dad," I answered. "He got into an accident," I added."Oh. I'm sorry, JV. How is he?""He's fine. He's still sleeping. Mom said there was not much impact. He got a broken arm and
It isn't time for hell week just yet. Finals is still a month away. But right now, it feels like it was hell week for me. I have a lot to do- an article for the weekly report, reaction paper on a film we watched in my history class, a report paper for an experiment we did in my bio class, and a poem I have to write (in Japanese!) in my Foreign Language class, and all are due on Friday. It's already Tuesday and I'm starting to panic. It was like all of them agreed to make me suffer this week.I know it isn't just me. Life in college is pretty much like this but god, this is making me crazy."Did you sleep at all?" Taylor asked. It's 7 in the morning and she just woke up. While me, well, I was awake since 3 am. After class yesterday, I did my article for the weekly report, which serves as my attendance for the meeting since I didn't go to the office. I still wasn't able to finish it so I thought I'd finish it later after class.After it, I ate my dinner (which was bought by Taylor) and
I don't think I am a jealous person. I grew up being the eldest child in the family, which somehow made me feel like I should be independent. As the eldest, I learned to do things on my own and not to rely on others. Growing up, I've seen my parents give extra care to our youngest- Hyacinth. I don't really mind because I thought I was old enough so it was about time my parents should give their attention to our youngest. But then I saw how Dahlia got jealous most of the time when we were kids. I remember her crying and demanding my parents to give the same attention to her. My eldest ass could never.With that, I figured that Dahlia is indeed the jealous type. Then I thought, I didn't demand anything from my parents even if I know I want the same attention and I don't feel upset over it. I thought maybe I was just mature for my age. But then it hit me. Maybe I'm just not the jealous type."You were clearly jealous, Jas," Taylor said. I told her what happened at the pathway earlier. I
I promised myself that before the semester ends, I'll tell my parents about me and Flint. I feel awful for hiding something from them. Maybe I was just a coward. But I really dreaded telling it to them because I don't know if they'll be supportive or not. Of course I want them to be supportive because I really like Flint. Sure, I still don't know if we love each other, but we'll get there. I know we'll get there. It's just that right now, we're just enjoying each other's company.The finals are almost over. I have two remaining exams. I've already submitted all my final requirements and I was glad I started those early. I haven't gotten enough sleep lately because I was quite paranoid because of the exams. I don't even have enough time to hang out with Flint. Most of the time, I just stayed in our room to do stuff. Also, Flint's so busy too so it's really not an issue.Now that I only have two exams left, I feel like I'm starting to have more time to think about things. For the last
The first taste of alcohol was awful. Upon taking a sip from the glass, the bitter taste hits my tongue. I tried my best to swallow it all at once and I felt like it burnt my throat.I made a face after one sip and I heard Flint chuckle while looking at me."This is fun for you, huh?" I mumbled. He already drank a glass but it doesn't seem to affect him. Me, I feel like I'm about to puke right now."I think it is," Flint said with a grin.I took the glass and drank it in one go. My co-members cheered on me."Woah. Slow down," Flint mumbled."I think it's about time we witness drunk Jasmine," I said, giving him a smile. He shook his head, but there was a smile on his lips.We drank more. Well, except for Flint. He didn't really drink much because he said he still has to drive so he needs to stay sober. Also, someone needs to take care of me when I get drunk.The team was having fun and most of my co-members were already drunk. I could feel my face heating up and my head spinning a litt
When Mom said she's near, I went out of the apartment and waited for her outside. I brought the things I would need because we can't discuss things in the apartment because Taylor's there. It's almost dark now and I'm not sure where she would take me so we could talk. But I couldn't care less. There are far more important matters we need to prioritize. A few meters away from where I am standing, I saw her car slowing down. I felt the erratic beating of my heart again. I am about to know something tonight. It could be big. It might surprise me. But I'd rather feel that way than be clueless at all. Mom stopped the car right in front of me. She looked at me through the window to her side. "Hi, hun," she greeted. I could tell she's a little tensed. "Hi, Mom," I replied. "Hop in," she said. I did what I was told and got inside the passenger's seat. As soon as I sat there and settled, silence enveloped us. I'm not used to the silence. Mom and I talk a lot and I hate that we
After that interaction with that man, I couldn't go back to what I was initially doing. There are a lot of things running in my head- questions I was answers on. I can no longer concentrate so I decided to just go back to the apartment. No one was there when I get home so I'm pretty much alone- alone with my thoughts. I couldn't even stay still. I would lay on the bed, sit up, stand up, pace around the room. I was restless and I know I couldn't do anything if I don't ask my Mom. If there's someone who can explain me everything, that would be my Mom. So I got my phone and dialed her number. As much as I want to go home to ask my questions in person, but that would take hours. I can't wait for a few more hours just for my questions to be answered. I needed it to be now. Mom's phone just rang on my first call. I couldn't just give up. So I dialed her number again. On the third ring, she finally answered and my heart almost jump upon hearing her voice. "Are you okay, hun?" Was t
The weeks continued and our set up stayed the same. Due to Flint's busy schedule, there are days when we don't see each other. It's sad and I was really longing for his presence each time, but I understand that I can't demand for his time because he has things he needed to do. I was also kind of getting used to going somewhere alone when my friends are busy. When Flint still has a flexible time, he's the one I'm always with. I'm pretty much used to being alone, but it's just sadder now. Today is one of those examples. Taylor has a thing with her organization, Sean went out with his friends, and Bailey, who I really considered one of my close friends now has a date with Elisse. Flint doesn't get jealous anymore with Bailey. He had seen him together with Elisse once and according to him, they were making out to the point that he wanted to shout at them and tell them to get there own room. After that, he never got jealous again, because he knows Bailey already has someone he's craz
I know Flint. I know when he's mad, when he's stressed- pretty much everything. For the many months that we've been together, I've learned not to counter his sour mood with another sour mood, and I believe he's also like that when I'm the one in a bad mood.We don't always have good days so I understand if he's in a bad mood most of the time, especially now that all his school loads are quite hectic.Hearing his tone, I know he's not in a good mood so I just try to give him a small smile as I open the gate so we can get inside the apartment. It's already dark and cold outside so we need to be inside.Nobody talked while we were on the way to our unit. All I could hear was the sound of our shoes on the floor. Right then, I knew Flint's tired and probably so stressed. I'm not really a patient person, but with him, I can always stretch it. Maybe that's how love is.When I opened the door to our apartment, I saw Taylor sitting on the stool at the counter, with her laptop in front of her.
Relationships really has its ups and downs. All throughout the months Flint and I were together, we had fights and also made up. There were days when I thought we were really going to break up but he would do unexpected things... he would try to win me back each time.I love Flint. And I love how he makes things better for me. I love how he always say sorry even if it's not his fault. I love how he always make sure I had coffee before classes because he knows how I don't function well without caffeine. I love how he brings me food I didn't even know I wanted even when I don't say anything.I love him. Everything he does, I love it.I've always thought that like any other relationships, ours will also have its honeymoon phase just in the beginning. But eversince we were together, Flint does everything that exceeds my expectations. In return, I also do the same. I make sure that I give him the same love I'm receiving.But no matter how perfect a relationship may seem, there will always
"Hi!" I happpily greeted. It took a few seconds before Flint looked my way. When he did, he then smiled."Hey," he murmured. I scowled a little when I realized that there was tension between him and Bailey. I don't know what's up. I just know something doesn't sit right with them.I tried to dismiss it though. Maybe it was just me reading too much into the situation. "Hey, we have a new applicant," I said smilingly. I then turned to Bailey and smiled at him. "This is Bailey. He's a transferee and we have the same major! He's interested in joining the Weekly Report," I mumbled."Hey," Bailey mumbled. He offers his hand for a handshake. Flint took it as he introduced himself."I'm Jasmine's boyfriend," he said."And the Weekly Report's layout artist," I added."Great. Nice to meet you," Bailey mumbled."Ditto," Flint said. He then turned to me. "Are you still needed here?" He queried."Yeah, I guess. Eya will be alone if I leave," I replied."Oh, no. It's okay. You can go, lovers. The
It was officially the first day of the second semester. Like the first day last semester, it was pretty much like introduction of syllabus and other stuff about our subjects. We also had some activities and most of the professors only talked to us for a while and then dismiss us.On the oval, there were a lot of booths organized by the different clubs here in school. It was recruiting season again so after the class, students come and visit the booths to see and check what clubs are available.Since I don't have a class anymore, I proceed on our booth. It was currently headed by Eya and Robin. Robin will have a class in a few minutes so I'll take over. We will cater students' questions regarding the rules and regulation of the club, as well as how our organization works.We also handed out flyers. There were some new faces which I bet were transferees and they're looking around. They reminded me of me when I was still new here in the university. Well, I'm technically still new, but I'
Days passed by so quickly. My last duty at the admin office was yesterday and now I'm just here at the apartment, resting and preparing myself for the upcoming semester.I've already applied for the scholarship that I was eyeing and received a reply that I passed. This semester, I'm officially a scholar which means that my parents don't have to pay for my tuition. It was a really big help especially that Dahlia will be in college soon. Mom and Dad were happy about the news. I didn't tell them I applied for the scholarship. I just told them that my average qualified and I just thought of applying.I also received the news that I was one of the students who got a high GWA for the first semester. In the first week of classes, there will be an activity to be held for those outstanding students. Certificates will be handed out and parents are invited. I thought it wasn't that huge of a deal for my parents because they've been doing it ever since I started going to school. They pretty much
After saying I love you to the person you love, what comes next? Do we take this relationship to the next level? If so, what's the next level? There were a lot of things running through my head when we first exchanged those three words. I know I already felt it and it's the truest it can be. I love being with Flint. I love telling him how my day went. I love how he listens to me everytime. I love how we become so comfortable with each other. I love Flint. It wasn't my plan to tell it to him while we were doing the deed, but at that moment, I just couldn't keep it in. I love him, and I'm afraid this love is overflowing. He's my first love. He's the first ever guy aside from a family member that I ever loved. I've written romance stories, and also read those kinds, but in reality, it was a different thing. For starters, it's reality. There's no pause, no cliff-hanger scenes. In real life, things go on. After we did it, we fell asleep. Now, it's already morning and all I did eversi