Natasha really cannot dance; it’s so bad, it’s painful, but she seems to embrace it like a champ, and we end up giggling ridiculously. I try showing her how to shimmy but she just can’t, how to sexy wiggle, which is worse than bad, and even for the life of me, I try showing her how to just sway side to side and fake a dance, but each and every attempt is just hopeless. I have never known a woman have such little fluidity to her movements as her, and she seems so prim and proper out there that I have to rescue her before this starts to become embarrassing. I shake my head when it’s clear the new faster beat to the next song is beyond her capabilities and drag her back to the bar above, back into the fold of Arrick’s friends in a happier mood, strangely light and forgetting everything else for a minute.
When we get back up the stairs, I notice he’s standing at the bank of windows with Nathan and a couple of other men. They’ve been watch
I’ve been down here for the best part of an hour, not as drunk as I want to be despite downing a few, but I cannot shake this awful soul-destroying agony in my chest. I don’t let the tears fall, knowing the mess it will make of my face and make me look pathetic. Instead, I do what I do best; I lift that chin, push the pain down behind the block of ice that is now lodged in my heart, and swear I will never say his name again.I don’t need him.I find some of his friends down here and dance like my feet are burning, paste on my party face and revert to Sophie of the city. The one who spent two years coping with her heartbreak alone. Able to function while a black hole overtakes my soul, smiling and acting like nothing fazes me. I chat to people I recognize and run into a few faces I know. A good little act at being okay while the wall of mirrored glass above my head conceals the man who’s taken another huge dump on my heart.Pushin
I’m blocked by Camilla, thrusting a champagne glass in my face almost immediately; it’s like she knows my intention and is telling me to back off without saying a word. The glass she gives me is of something clear, and I notice the weird oily swirl running down the center as though something alien has been freshly poured in.I glance from the drink and back to Camilla, catching sight over her shoulder of the girl I’d been about to rescue, being fucked in a corner, pounded against in the most vulgar way, while her face is that same gaping emptiness, and I recoil, nausea rising up. From here, all you see are his back and shoulders, no hint that he’s exposed at the front, his hand pushed hard at the wall, concealing her mostly, while the other keeps her leg up at his hip so he can screw her standing up. Subtle thrusting motions are all that give the game away.
Hands come around to grab my breasts and I lash out furiously, trying to yank free with little effect, wriggling to move but it’s almost futile. I’m held taut, and I can only imagine they think the super drug is going to render me docile at any minute. I start to panic. So many flashing images running through my head to send me over the edge if I let that pervert back in to render me useless. I claw away the visuals and try to focus on staying here, in the now.“What the fuck, Cam?” I snap at her, but the male behind me yanks me back against him harder, clutching my breasts painfully from behind, diving into my naked neck and shoulder and biting my skin with little care to leaving marks. I react psychotically, turning in his arms with new found strength from a sudden adrenaline boost, yanking my wrists free and throwing my hands at his chest with slaps and shoves that are quickly restrained with fast reflexes and what feels like a million hands.
Throwing all my faith into how much I mean to him, I let him go, run around the side of the two of them and push in between as soon as he reels back to take another punch. I close my eyes tight and brace myself for the impact of at least one hit, because of how quickly I have managed to get between the two bodies. Freezing when I do so, inhaling sharply as I prepare for a smack, but nothing happens.I open one eye, and then the other slowly, relieved to see him staring at me, fist poised in mid-air and breathing so hard that he’s panting. His eyes are on mine, a look of confusion and rage mingled together, and I literally cross myself and make a little ‘thank you’ sign to the gods above, even though I’m not religious. That could have been goddamn nasty.I reach out, grabbing his wrist and pull it down to me, cradling
Natasha reaches out and takes his arm, bringing him back to reality. He frowns at her and then me and follows obediently for a second, releasing his hold on me.“Wait. Where are you going?” He turns back to me when he realizes I’m not following him. Eyes suddenly clear and confusion ruling instead, a snap of instant despair in those beautiful depths.I guess he really was not listening after all. I blanch at his sudden mental presence, thinking he could have snapped back to the present a bit quicker than this, but now is not the time.“Home. Bring my jacket later when you come back, I’ll get a cab. I have my bag here and money.” I point at the little tiny clutch that’s been nestled on me all night. A thin chained strap over my body that makes it almost invisible. I have everything I need to get home to his safe apartment.“No, Sophs … I’m taking you home, I’m coming with you. I take care o
I tie the robe around me when I’m dry, the shower having made me feel a hundred times better, and I throw everything I was wearing in the bathroom trash can. Underwear, shoes, and all. I never want to lay eyes on any of it again, and if I didn’t think it would set off all Arry’s fire detectors and cause a huge scene, then I would burn it all. The thought of that creep all over it makes me want to gag.I venture out into the lounge slowly, on Bambi legs. I need a glass of water and then I’m going to bed to forget this night ever happened, and I’ll deal with the emotional fallout tomorrow. I stop short when I spot Arrick still sitting on the couch, nursing a coffee, still dressed, seemingly a lot more normal and sober, but in complete torment. I figured he would have gone to bed by now and not to still be sat out here in the low lights. He looks wrecked, more with it, and just emotional for once.“You feel any better?” His eyes m
It’s almost dawn and I’m lying on my bed. I’ve barely slept, waiting for him to come back, with a million thoughts running through my brain, tormenting me into oblivion. His phone is here, not smashed thankfully, despite it hitting a marble floor. At some point I regained enough sense to wander over and pick his things up, like a mute zombie trying to find something to do besides stare at a closed elevator. I left them on the kitchen counter. I paced like crazy, cried myself sick with heartbreak, disappointed in myself then ended up in here hoping to try and sleep.I’m wretched and anxious and all I keep seeing is that ragged torn look on her face, as though I had just slayed her entire family with a dirty spoon, right before her eyes. All I keep thinking about is the way he ran after her, like it was all that mattered and left me here to be alone. The excruciating pai
“Here.” I pass Jenny the sketches we have been working on across the table and the pretty brunette leans in to pour over them with interested soft brown eyes. Tall and slender and a little shy in her mannerisms, Jenny is my classmate and fast becoming one of my closest friends, next to Christian; both of whom I met on day one of orientation and something just clicked with the three of us, straight off. I have something real with these two and despite myself, they have both wormed their way under my self-defense system over the last few weeks until I simply need them around me to function.Christian is standing five feet away and draping some wild bohemian fabric on a tailor’s dummy to no avail. All tall and immaculately groomed in his “preppy boy” outfit today. Blonde floppy hair and gray-eyed, his grin aimed at his two best girls. We are tucked in a corner of the busy sewing room while the hustle and bustle of the other students around us