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2024-10-29 19:42:56“Feeling any better?” Wilma’s arm is around my shoulder. Her soft voice is in my ear as she rubs my back in her office. I had a full-blown emotional break down and did something I never ever imagined PA Emma would ever do. I told her everything about Jake, and how I really feel about him in a fit of blubbering sobs. Things I haven’t even told Sarah. I blame the maternal pull Wilma has over me and the darn gentle look she manages to throw my way at every opportunity. I’m using an almost empty packet of scrunched up Kleenex to mop up my mess of a face, sniffing down the last dregs of my self-esteem.
She sat and listened, and nodded, and some of the time, I saw that knowing look in her eye and assumed Margo had told her the odd tidbit of my sorrowful tale. She listened quietly, her gentle touch on me the whole time, letting me get it all out. She seems unsurprised to know I had sex with Jake. But then I gues
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I walk into the empty apartment two hours later, dump my bag on the table and survey the room. I don’t even want to be here, I should be at work organizing, instead of coming home to sob into my pillow. I need to get a grip of my life. Wilma is right and all of this has been non-stop, yet all I’ve done is bury my head in the sand and pushed myself to go to work, never taking the time to absorb it all. I need time to think. Real time to myself, to figure out what I’m going to do.Do I want to work in Europe? No … I don’t want to leave New York. Do I want to leave Carrero House? No. I love working there, it’s familiar and stable. Plus, I adore Wilma, Margo, and even Rosalie. I would miss the people I see every day even though we don’t interact much. I couldn’t leave Sarah. I mean, I know she has Marcus and lately, I’m starting to warm to him a little. I even laughed at
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I get up with renewed vigor the next morning. I’ve slept better than I have for days and somehow, I‘m more able to cope. I eat, wave Sarah off to work and tell her I have a day off to get ready for the dance. It’s not a complete lie as I intend to get ready in grand fashion, going to lengths I’ve never bothered with before. Wilma is right, a good dress and a girly night with Leila will help. I intend to follow Leila’s example. Something she taught me on the yacht was pampering is an enjoyable girly pursuit and can almost fool you into believing you don’t have a broken heart. She also told me that a good night with a girlfriend can change your whole outlook on life.I manage to book an appointment at a beauty salon for just after noon and I’m having the works. Nails, hair, waxing, make-up. I have a room full of people to impress, who have seen nothing but gaunt and lifeless Emma for weeks. Senior Carrero will be there, and I want to re
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“Oh, I promised someone a first slow dance.” Leila turns me, shoving me into Jake, hard. He automatically reacts and catches me, again, keeping me upright as I collide with his chest, righting me once more. He lets me go as though I’ve burned him, shifting apart and upping the awkward tension between us. “Keep her warm for me until I come back, Jacob!” She grins cheekily and takes off at speed.“That girl …” he utters tightly, avoiding my face.“You’ve got to love her though.” I shrug, biting my lip. The nervousness is overwhelming me, unable to look at his face and the music is moving into full swing as couples move around us, joining together to sway. I fidget with my hair awkwardly and shuffle my feet, looking around for a quick exit. This is beyond unbearable and incredibly intense. I catch him glaring at my fingers mid-twirl and release the strand nervously. He can still close me down with a look.
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The doubts I had about Jake in the past are dispersed with the strength of the look he’s giving me. His pain and heartbreak mirrored in mine, that same longing to have me as I have wanted him.I think Jake loves me!My world spins, the realization that everything I’ve felt, everything I’ve been so afraid of is right here in his green depths, staring back at me without hesitation.“Come with me?” he whispers, even though the room is noisy, I hear him loud and clear and nod. His gaze is focused so intently on me, flicking from my eyes to my mouth. His face flickering as he concentrates on my lips as though he’s experiencing internal pain. He kisses me again, lightly, sending flutters through me, tingles to every cell. A sweet kiss, not one of passion and misunderstanding but a ‘You’re mine and I can’t believe get to touch you this way’ kiss.He lets go of my face and grabs my
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“Oh, I always knew you weren’t a gentleman.” I jest, biting my lip unable to tear my gaze from his mouth either.You’re perfection.“Hey! I’ve been very well behaved. You have no idea the kind of thoughts that went through my head concerning you.” He catches my wrists and pins them over my head with one hand, his other sliding up from my waist and along my ribs suggestively.“None of that surprises me, you and your ex-rated mind. I always knew you had Casanova tendencies.” I tremble with shivers as his touch ignites feelings inside me that are equally ex-rated, and I tense my thighs together to fight insane urges.“Cheeky!” He plants a swift kiss on my lips then leans back to continue watching me. He lets my hands go, “You’re beautiful, and you’re all mine!” We smile at one another, then he quickly delivers another lip grazing kiss. Trying it out, enjoying t
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The car journey to his apartment passes in a flurry of back seat grinding and fumbling, lying flat across the smooth leather seat. Jake heavy on top of me with hands and mouth all over my skin, pushing me to a searing heat that has me panting and kissing me as though he’s been deprived for years. Toe-curling kisses that have me begging for more. My fingers feel out his shirt and bow tie, undoing both so they hang freely open while his naked strong chest is covered in my lipstick kisses and his jackets discarded on the floor.If the internal, blacked out window of the limo hadn’t been there, I would be ashamed of what Jefferson would be witnessing. Jake almost has me on the seat, his desire set free, my body no longer out of bounds for him and he’s making the most of it. All my inner voices and fears chased away by his kiss while the doubts and panic are gone.He bites, nips, licks, and kisses every exposed part of me, rips my underwear off under my dr
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“Turn over.” He commands gently, and I do as I’m told as he comes to kneel over me and starts undoing my dress. My body sags a little at the release from the tight corset. “This dress is coming out to play again, next time we’ll keep it on.” He almost growls, his voice raspy and deep. He sounds more like passionate Jake now and it excites me beyond belief. He catches my hips, pulling me down the bed until my feet slide to the floor and stands me up. When I do, the dress falls around my ankles, so I’m left standing in lace panties with the warmth of his naked torso against my back, his hands trailing down my exposed waist and igniting goosebumps. I close my eyes and let my hands drop to my sides, exposing my naked breasts.“These can stay on.” He helps me step out of my dress, his hand cupping my foot in my high stiletto shoe and he runs a finger up the back of my naked leg, causing me to shiver in anticipation. He moves aw
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I wake in the early morning light entangled in Jake’s limbs and bed sheets, my body aching and heavy from everything he’s done to me through the night. I can’t help but smile at the memories, a warm blush traveling over my sensitive skin.If I had thought Jake had a high sex drive when dating his string of floozies, I have severely underestimated him. Last night, he’d been addicted to my body, barely giving me time to recover. He’d been true to his promise and brought me to dizzying heights of orgasm more than once with his expertise and confidence in pleasuring me. There is not a single inch of my skin he has not kissed or licked or massaged softly and I finally passed out from exhaustion, rather than his wavering libido. My brain too confuddled to function anymore. My Casanova is truly a master in the bedroom, with the confidence of a man who has no sexual inhibitions. I am literally glowing all over.Old Emma has been reborn.
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The Carrero Influence ~ The Dance ~ Jake shifted in his seat for the millionth time and tried once more to get his brain to focus on the laptop on the highly polished walnut surface. He just couldn’t keep himself on track lately. The sound of a female clearing her throat startled him to look up and the impatient stance of Margo waving a piece of paper with a raised eyebrow suggested she had been talking to him while he was zoned out. “Sorry. What?” He frowned and sighed heavily, pushing himself back into his molded leather chair and rolled up his shirt sleeves in agitation. “For God’s sake, Jacob. I’ve been here for three minutes talking at you. You need to just bloody well call her.” Margo’s stern tone did nothing to help his current mood, and he just shifted forward again to try to ignore that intent, chastising glare. He went to his laptop, ducking his head in an attempt to dodge her blue eyes and typed something aimlessly. “Don’t k
The Carrero Effect 270
The Carrero Influence~ The Elevator Scene ~Jake walked out of the boardroom meeting without any clue as to what he had just sat and endured for the last hour. Margo had been glaring his way and nudging him with her foot under the table every few minutes and making him all the more aware of how ‘out of it’ he was. He had been this way ever since his father’s email had come in, informing him that Emma was back in his building; Back within reach and he had no idea how to handle it. He didn’t know if he should be happy or panicked that he could just see her around his building again, he wasn’t sure how the hell to feel about it but couldn’t deny the slight feeling of hope in his chest that he could bump into her.If he was being honest, he hadn’t had his head in the game for weeks, not since he had sent her away and today was just another prime example of how ‘not well’ he was doing without her in his life.
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The Carrero Effect~ The Holiday: Part 2 ~Jake was searching under the water, too dark to see anything and scrambling with his hands at anything that felt like it could be Daniel. Panic gripping his stomach as he frantically surfaced for air and dove again. He had hit the water without a thought the second he knew Danny was in here. No cares that he was maybe too drunk for this and just endlessly searching despite his muscles aching and being so heavy he could barely move anymore. It felt like it had been hours instead of minutes and he still hadn’t found him. He wouldn’t give up on him, he wouldn’t lose his best friend this way.Surfacing for air quicker this time he took a moment to drag more into his burning lungs and wipe the water from his eyes. He could hear yelling from the deck, crying from Leila and other voices but he was fully zoned-in on the surface of the water looking for any signs of him.“He’s here, Mr. Carre
The Carrero Effect 268
The Carrero Effect~ The Holiday: Part 1 ~Jake strolled into his apartment and threw his bag down on the couch. It had been a long trip and an even longer week, but he suddenly felt restless at being back. Normally, getting home brought him all kinds of joy, but this time it felt slightly empty, and he actually wished they’d stayed at that damn dance just so he could still be with her right now. Pacing to the window and looking out across the New York skyline he ran his hand through his hair and cracked his neck in a bid to release some of the tension building up his spine. Flexing his arms over his head and straining the jacket holding him tight. He needed to get out of this monkey suit they called a tux and get comfy, maybe he just needed to feel less business-like and properly relax. Maybe he needed a drink.He needed to stop fixating on Emma; it wasn’t healthy, and the constant stream of thoughts he had about her was getting harder to control. S
The Carrero Effect 267 - Bonus Chapters
The Carrero Effect~ The First Meeting ~Jacob Carrero stood in his room in front of the large mirror over the vanity and warmed hair wax between his fingers, smirking at the familiar black and gold branded product on the wooden surface. His father was still lording over the decision to start a male grooming line with Jake’s face all over the advertising campaign; not that he cared. He was used to being publicly owned, always on show, and every woman’s idea of a fantasy male.Which guy wouldn’t? Women falling at your feet every day. Hell yeah.He rubbed it through his hair expertly and spiked it up toward the center and forward in its trademark style. He was never really one for much fussing over his hair, this kept it sorted and then he never had to care for the rest of the day or mess with it unless he ran his hands through and mussed it up. If he had his way, he would shave it all off, but he had done that in his teens and he
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I catch sight of some of my favorite women on the right-hand side of the aisle. Margo is wiping a tear from her eye and nudging Wilma in her side as both woman wave to me. They’re blowing their noses and crying as Donna throws tissues their way. My crazy trio of motherly hens. Donna’s mascara is pouring down her normally flawless face and I spot Rosalie wave from behind a very handsome man, grinning wildly and looping arms with him, a look of radiant happiness on her pretty face. I beam back at them with a tiny wave before moving on in time to the music, slow steps, with Giovanni leading the way.I catch sight of the Huntsbergers, my new extended family sitting close by and smile warmly at them. The row of adopted children and Huntsberger father looking so proud of his family. Ben and his baby son are near the end of the row. He’s is cuddling him proudly and looking every bit the doting dad. He is now the soul parent o
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“My son was in pain and hiding from what he wanted most,” he says so factually, looking down at me, “I put you back in his path, so he would stop being a coward.” Giovanni grins and all words leave my brain in an open-mouthed silent gawp; realization dawning on me so suddenly that I am literally rendered speechless.He sent me back to Carrero House? Making me believe that he was going to fire me if I didn’t … an ultimatum that led us to where we are now.Giovanni is admitting to maneuvering me back into Jake’s building, so we would end up back in each other’s arms, crafty jerk that he is. He giggles like a schoolboy at my obviously shocked expression and pats my hand tenderly over his inner elbow. That self-confident effortless look on a man who always sees all and knows everything.“No need to thank me, Emma.” He
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I smooth my hands down my ivory wedding dress. It’s classy elegance and understated top is lined with a simple sleeveless fitted bodice and tiny pearl detailing. It has a full wispy floating skirt, and layers and layers of chiffon puffing out to a full-length cloud of loveliness. It’s a fairy-tale princess dress and matches beautifully with the elegant engagement ring twinkling on my hand, sparkling in all its shining glory.I admire my flawless natural make-up in the mirror, touching up my nude lipstick. My tawny hair is wild and curled in its loose romantic style, tiny tendrils hang around my face and I appraise my reflection with pride.I look beautiful! I feel beautiful and serene. There is no fear whatsoever.I look like a woman hopelessly in love, about to marry the man of her dreams.I am that woman.I slide on my satin ivory stilettos that almost mirror the shoes I used to adore so much. It feels weird to be ba
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I am getting so frustrated at myself, my inner anger rears up. I’m surrounded by the song that gave me two of the happiest moments of my life, when he gave me his all, and yet here I am lying here, my sub-conscious holding me back from what I deserve. It’s like the beginning of our relationship all over again. I’m back to the defiant, closed-off Emma who never let him in, always holding back when he needed me most.No! I am not doing this to you, Jake. Not anymore, I won’t!The song is a reminder that he doesn’t always need to be my strength, but a prompt to show me that sometimes I need to be his too. I need to build my own force to find my way back. I need to hold him up and face whatever reality comes when my body wakes up. Maybe that’s why my mind doesn’t want me to wake up. It’s afraid that what Ray did to me will make me hide in the shadows again, that I won’t be able to love Jake and le
