— H O O R —. . . “I am. Why do you ask though?” He asks me, gazing into my eyes so softly that for a moment that passes between us, I am lost in those deep blue chasms. I remain silent, looking at his face. His lips curl softly into a small smile as he leans closer, pushing his face into the crook of my neck. I squint my eyes, mumbling, “Because your behavior is different today.”“I know,” he says, chuckling. He raises his face again and adds, “Anyway, leave that.”He moves back and I miss the warmth he gives me. I miss his proximity. It feels like I am made for it — to be close to him. He stands beside me. “I have planned something for this evening,” he begins, leaning against the glass door.“And what’s that?” “Well, you'll get to know soon,” he shrugs, “Just be ready.”I narrow my eyes, wondering about his ‘plan’, but then, I do not wish to ask him further. I am not sure when his mood triggers and he starts scolding me again. Not like I am scared of him. I just do not want m
— H O O R —. . . I sigh as I behold the beauty of the place Zahir has selected for us. For dinner. It is vast. A table is set in the middle, holding dishes and a bottle of wine. The place is decorated with roses and I smell the pleasant and pretty fragrance of roses, mixed with the scent of burning candles. Around us, there is nobody and I look behind, finding Zahir as he approaches me. “Like what you see?” He asks me, standing beside me. “I do. It’s so beautiful,” I say, smiling at him, “And it’s for me?” I doubt it, seriously. He chuckles. “Then who can it be?” He raises his eyebrows, raising his arm to put on my shoulders like I am his childhood buddy. “Who knows?” I play along, “What if you have someone else in your mind?”“Or maybe in heart?” He adds, making me gape at him. Seriously? I was just joking. “Tell me, you’re joking, Zahir,” I narrow my eyes, turning to face him whole. “Or else?” He challenges me, facing me and giving me the same look. “You don’t challenge m
— Z A H I R —. . . “Zahir,” I hear the soft voice of Hoor calling my name. I hum in response. She taps my shoulder. “Leave me,” she says, groaning as she tries to get out of my hold. I do not want to. And I wish I could answer her this straight but I remain silent and do not even make a move. Well, as I said, I do not want to leave her. I like holding her while sleeping and I want to stay in bed for another hour. I am in no mood to get out though I know she somewhere in her heart wishes to explore more. I will take her out and I promised myself last night about it but not now. We have the entire day to do such things and almost a week to explore the city. I am sure she will be satisfied. But at least I should be rewarded for it, no?I do not ask for great things. I just want to sleep like that as long as we are together. I like holding her like this. She smells sweet and her small waist fits perfectly in my arms. Her warmth comforts me and I love pushing my face into her chest
— H O O R —. . . “Right. Why don’t you wear it often?” He says softly, smiling at me but maybe he is not aware of it. And what did he even say? I keep staring at him, biting my bottom lip. Well, I can’t wear a saree all the time because it is not comfortable on all occasions. And I think Zahir, too, can see it. But men will be men. How would he realize that I am not fond of draping a saree every time? “It’s because saree is not comfortable every time, Zahir.” I shrug and he frowns. But I do not wait for any answer. I turn around and leave. Getting ready, I come out and find Zahir still lying over the bed, draped in the quilt, and sleeping on his stomach. What? Does he really not wish to get up today? I check the time. It is already quarter to eleven in the morning. I go to him and sit next to him. My eyes fall on his half-revealed face and the thought of innocence on his face comes to my mind.My eyes remain fixed on him and my breathing starts slowing down. Soft and slow. Z
— H O O R —. . . Tears leave the corner of my eyes as he keeps tickling me, stacking my stomach because he has realized that this is my weakest point of mine. “Zahir, let go!” I scream, turning and trying to hide myself from him. He stops, taking a deep breath. His hands remain close to my stomach as if he is threatening me while he asks, “Now say you won’t lie to me.”“I won’t,” I mewl, closing my eyes. He chuckles, looking down at me. “Aren’t you like a small child?” He wiggles his eyebrows, “Lying to me as if I don’t know?” He continues further, leaning closer. His arms cage me as he leans in and we are so close to each other. Under him, I get nothing but to stare at his handsome appearance as he gazes deep into my eyes. Should this be so—for him to come so close to me? I keep this in my head and do not let the words come out because for the moment passing, this all feels right and pleasant.Surely, I do not want to cross limits with him and I know how to keep this in mind s
— H O O R —. . . The day passed normally and we did not fight. Not even for once. After our pretty and very peaceful morning, Zahir was called back by his laptop and he busied himself with it, leaving me alone. I did not mind that. I got other things to do. Probably make a list of places that I want to visit and their famous dishes that I want to try. Well, I literally could not make a list of food because I did not find it very amazing. Indian food is better and I know it is only because I am an Indian. It is according to my liking, spicy and hot. Unlike Zahir, who starts gasping if a pinch of spices gets more in it. Yeah, I have seen him doing that. Water! Water! — that’s what he starts chanting. Oh, poor man. He can’t even taste the delicious calling of chilly potato. Yes, I ordered it and added pepper. I asked him before adding it to my plate and he said he wouldn’t be eating it because he was very busy with his work. Like VERY busy, you understand? I also had no proble
— H O O R —. . . When talked about ‘talent’, it reminds me of the parable told in the Bible by Jesus Christ, the Lord. It is the story of three servants of a man who were given talents by their master. To one he was given five talents, to another he was given three talents and to the third he was given one talent.He gives them the talents and goes out and expects them to earn something from the talents given to them till he returns. The one who has five talents earns five more talents from them. He who has three earns three more, but he who has one talent does not do anything with it. In fact, he goes and buries that one talent in the soil because he says to himself that my master is a very harsh man. He takes from where he did not put any effort. He was afraid that his master might curse him, but when his master came, his fear came true.But when his master comes and takes account of everyone, he praises the remaining two servants for their work and hard work and gives them the
— H O O R —. . .The night we had dinner together, talking with each other about random things. Zahir was soft and nice to me, smiling at me all the time.For a moment, indeed I was wondering about his behaviour towards me. Do not get me wrong when I say every time I keep wondering about the change in his behavior. I have a hard time coping with Zahir and whatever has happened between us two was not good and bright at all. At least not admirable. So of course, the change in him would always surprise me. But it was only a moment. I did not trouble my brain regarding this but enjoyed his sweet side. He is a handsome man with a good sense of humor. He is cute and lovely. Only when he is like that. After dinner, we came back to our room and I spent time reading the Bible and praying. He was busy with his laptop again but after half an hour, he came and joined me.He kneels beside me. Sensing his presence, I steal a glance at him and make a place for him, letting him sit beside me.
— Z A H I R —. . .It's been days since Hoor and I returned home after attending our relative's wedding. It was awesome, by her side, and on the other hand, I was nearly bored. Only nights were the most beautiful to me because we prayed together and spent some time together. I could not even imagine using the guest's room bed for making love with my wife so I restrained myself. However, it turned out to be a little harder when she kept throwing glances at me and getting ready for the functions. I had no other way than to look at her and praise her. I wanted to do more. After we returned, the first thing I did after taking a shower was to grab her in my arms and hug her like my life depended on it. She giggled, asking me about what changed in ms all of a sudden but I had nothing to answer her. I only breathed at that moment, loving her warmth and the softness of her chest against my head. That's my haven. That night we made love again and the more I explored her, the more needy
— Z A H I R —. . .I rejected it and I regret it now. It has been days since she confessed her feelings to me and I, like a bastard, rejected those feelings. Like every time, I only thought of responsibilities and all, not wishing to give our relationship a chance but after she started avoiding me, I had no other way than to realize my mistake. Hoor does not know, or maybe she is well aware of it that she even takes advantage of it that her ignorance brings me to my knees before her. I have felt it. Hoor makes me feel like I have admitted it to myself. Hoor has become a piece of mine, without whom, I am not whole. I am incomplete without her. I feel restless when she is away from me. When her eyes are not on me, I crave even one look at her. I know I can't live without her and she made me see it in those days. I thought maybe it was because we were getting used to each other so I decided to keep myself away from her. However, my own decision made me feel restless in my heart.
— H O O R —. . .He picks up the call while I sit, anticipating what is going to happen next. I fear Zahir's answer to Mr Hunt. I know he is a nice man but Zahir, in anger, says harsh things. I do not want him to start a fight with Mr Hunt. He puts the call on speaker and looks at me. His eyes linger over my face and solely catch my eyes. I swallow when I hear Mr Hunt's voice. “Hoor?” He asks, and I know I have to keep my mouth shut. “Hoor is with me. And stop calling her, okay?” Okay... It was not as gruff as I expected. I literally expected him to grab Mr Hunt's collar right pushing his hand into the screen of the phone and venting out all the frustration of the past night but he controlled it. Phew!“Uh...”“Yeah,” he breathes and disconnects the lines, tossing away my phone. My eyes widen. “Zahir, it's my phone! Have mercy on it!” I utter, trying to reach for my phone when he grabs my wrist and pulls me to him. I gasp, swallowing as I look at his face. I am glad the sheet
— H O O R —. . .“What's your problem, huh? Why are you behaving like a beast?” I utter, fuming with anger after whatever has happened. He has done this all! His jaw clenches but he does not give me a single look. I see his grip becoming lethal around the steering wheel as he drives the car smoothly. “Ask yourself! What's your problem, Hoor?” He asks instead, giving me a sharp glance over his shoulder. I purse my lips, trying not to say any bad words that will make me regret it later. “I'm totally fine. It's you alone who created a drama there. I don't understand why are you behaving like that!” I do not care if I am making it even more serious. I need answers. The atmosphere inside the car seems to change as it drops. He is trying hard to control his anger but I know he is dangerous when angry. However, I am not afraid to see his limits. Have seen his sides before and no doubt he is going to be like that again; harsh and brutal with words. “Behaving like what? A beast?” He tau
— H O O R —. . .Finding Mr Hunt at the party gave me some kind of relief. As Zahir too knows him, we got interacted and there I got to meet the girl with him. He introduced me to her and she felt pleasant. His choice is very good. However, on the other side, I could see Zahir glaring at us non-stop. It irked me. Now what does he want? I ignored that look. Mr Hunt too noticed how Zahir was keeping a poker face and answering him gruffly every time. When he was called suddenly by some of his partners, it was only Mr Hunt and me left alone. The woman he took with him also left to use the washroom. “Why is he behaving like that?” He asks me in a mutter, confused as he looks at me. My eyes remain on Zahir who is busy holding a conversation with an official man. There are two more with him, keeping him occupied. I stare at him silently, not answering Mr. Hunt for a moment being. I do not feel like doing it or maybe I am too lost admiring my husband among them. He is handsome, after
— H O O R —. . .“May I come in, ma'am?” I know what he is taking with him, and it is only for me to handle. I sigh as I look up from the screen that troubles my eyes. My gaze lands upon a man standing at the door and I am not sure how many times I have seen him today with towers of files in his arms. Only for me!“Of course,” I have to pass him a fake smile.He comes in and sets the tower beside other files. Wow. Just look at my room. How amazing it looks filled with files and files alone. And whose hand is all in this? Surely, my husband's! Because he does not want me to meet Mr Hunt anymore and he can't even confront me and order me around, so he is using such methods to keep me here. Not only that but he is keeping me with himself in meetings. All the meetings which were to be held in the next month and whatever was arranged by me, he thought of completing them all in this month itself. He made me make some changes in the schedule and everywhere he carried me. All this just
— H O O R —. . .“So tell me...” He begins nervously, running a hand through his hair as he looks at me. I wait for him. Maybe he is going to take eternity. Who knows? He is always like that around me; shy and all. Even now he is unable to look me in the eyes. I too do not have any obsession with it. To me, Zahir's eyes are everything. Keeping the straw in my mouth as I enjoy my Faluda ice cream, I steal a glance at his already-flushed face. Now what does he see? I roll my eyes back to the setting sun and realize that I have spent more time with him. I do not worry about my work. I know I will complete the pending tasks but I needed to refresh my mind which he helped me having. He is an amazing friend, to be honest. After how Zahir spoiled my mood with that interrogation, he called me and I came out to meet him. He took me to places around and bought me ice cream. Walk with him was nice as he kept cracking silly jokes. I was even laughing. Yeah, I like such stupid jokes. He wa
— H O O R —. . .Three days have passed. Life is going on as before. The only difference is that whatever happened between Zahir and me seems like a dream. Everything disappeared as soon as I opened my eyes.Work and prayer help me to forget all this every moment, but I cannot use them every moment to escape from the past. Because of whatever happened that night, I still feel as if there are wounds in my heart that have not healed yet. But I know that time will change everything and all wounds will heal. God will do it. Right now I am just waiting for these days to pass. Now that I know that our relationship is not going to improve, I do not want to stay here any longer.Another time my phone rings. It is Mr Hunt. I have been ignoring his calls since this morning but he does not seem to give up. I am not in the mood, simple. I do not want to talk to him but I know I have to. I will be responsible for many things then. Clenching my jaw, I pick up the call and I remove my gaze from
— H O O R —. . .“Are you out of your mind, Hoor?” He says, breaking all my expectations just in a second. I stare at him dumbfounded, my heart sinking deeper. My eyes do not flutter as they are set on him but he has my hands clammy in anticipation. I muster up the courage to ask, “Wh-What do you mean, Zahir?” My tone is confused. Still. I am still expecting him to give me an explanation so it can relieve the burn in my chest. “It's simple, Hoor!” He utters, getting up as he releases a deep sigh. His arm raises and he runs a hand through his hair. Once again as he shows he is frustrated. I narrow my eyes at him, staring at his face as he steps away, continuing, “It's simple that I don't wanna be in a relationship. And haven't I told you that already?” The next he turns around, eyes boring into mine. They hold frustration and anger, resembling a darker and deeper shade of ocean. His jaw clenches as he adds, “I made it clear already!”He did but I started having feelings for him.