Lynn: Your man tells me you're alone & in need of a night out until he can get to you tomorrowMe: BoooooooLynn: I'll be there in an hour. Put on a flirty dress. We'll go pretend we're loaded at a high-end restaurant downtownMe: Really Lynn? Lynn: Hell yes. He's buying & we have no spending limit. See you in an hour.Me: ...okLynn was right on time. It was hard not to laugh when we reached the street, and I saw her dad's Mercedes. "You really are playing this one up, aren't you?" "Hey, it's not every day someone else's man gives you a carte blanche spending limit to take his girlfriend out on the town and entertain her. My dad offered the car, so I took it, as I did your boyfriend's money. Stop worrying about it and have fun." She slid her sunglasses down her nose and walked like Jessica Rabbit toward the car. Her fabulous ruby-colored dress hugged her cute figure in all the right places, cinching her tummy, downplaying her enormous breasts, and drawing her into a perfect
It had been several hours since Brett left for the wedding. Gray's wife...fiancée...whatever she was now, had sent out invitations; she'd invited everyone at the distribution center. Brett felt obligated to go since he and Gray had worked together in management for years. He thought it was the right thing to do, and not showing up would send a negative impression to the rest of the staff. I didn't disagree, but I had wanted to go with him. But after talking to my counselor, I couldn't come up with a single productive reason for my presence. And in the end, it had been the right decision. Had I been in the church when he called, had he been able to physically reach me, things might have gone differently than they had. I didn't want to be with Gray, but I wasn't dumb enough to believe he didn't still have some weird power over me-just like I wasn't sure I could ever be near drugs again. Both were addictions, and both wreaked havoc on my life for far too many years.I replayed the phone
Twenty-four hours before the weddingTypically, it's the bride, who gets so excited in anticipation of her wedding day, she can't sleep. I had never been geared that way; however, Brett apparently was. I had no trouble sleeping and nerves about the big day hadn't hit me. Brett, on the other hand, had been running around like he was jacked up on coke. We had to leave for the airport early in the morning, and he'd been darting all over the house double checking our bags, loading the car, making sure he had our passports. The list was endless. I loved the man, but he needed to calm down before I became nervous and jittery. I'd tried for the last hour to get him to come to bed to no avail; it was time to pull out all the stops. I wanted my man in my bed, so I could curl up next to him and go to sleep. He refused to join me, so I went to him-naked. Stripped bare, I left a pile of clothes on the bedroom floor and crept down the stairs. He was in the kitchen getting the coffee ready to br
There weren't many people on the plane, but there could have been a massive horde, and I wouldn't have known it. I was asleep on Brett's shoulder before they pulled up the landing gear. I woke to the stewardess instructing me to put my seat upright and prepare for landing. Wiping the drool from my mouth, I gazed up at Brett to see the look of adoration he always showed me. Smiling, I acknowledged just how grateful I was that fate intervened with better plans than those I had for myself-I'd been given the perfect partner.The terminal was bustling with people. I couldn't help but notice the way women stared at Brett and glanced down to our intertwined hands. They didn't even try to mask the looks of disbelief as they scowled their judgment in my direction. I had no problem admitting, Brett and I did not look like a matched pair. Brett could've graced the cover of GQ, while I would've been better suited for Rolling Stone. He was breathtakingly beautiful with piercing-green eyes while I
She'd held out on me for over a year, but the reward was well worth the wait-Annie was insatiable. We had fooled around. She took care of me and kept me interested but always escorted me out the door when things got too heavy while we were dating. Initially, I hadn't known the specifics, but I knew her issues ran deep. Then add Gray's shit show to her life, and there was no way she wouldn't have needed time. The more I got to know her, the more of her life she revealed to me, the more surprised I became when she finally did open up. I knew she was inexperienced in terms of the number of players in her game, but we never discussed the intricacies of how she involved herself in the sport or the depth of her playbook. I got a hint, glimpsed it the night she moaned after I spanked her. Expecting her to jump, or possibly even yell, the cry of pleasure was a shock, and I sure as hell didn't know a woman could soak her panties with a smack on the ass. Our honeymoon was a period of explorati
"Do you think our friends will be mad?" she asked. Her voice filled with apprehension, and the thought lines in her forehead were pronounced. Annie hated to disappoint people, and I'd been waiting on this to rear its ugly head. I knew it would come and hoped like hell she didn't regret our decision in the end."Annie, I stand firm in the idea that sometimes it's easier to ask for forgiveness than permission. Our friends and family won't stop loving us because we got married without them." Smoothing her hair with my hand, I tried to reassure her, to soothe her worry away-but that was easier said than done."It may be that way for guys, but I'm afraid Jenny, Lynn, and Scarlett aren't going to see it the same. Some part of me always thought my wedding would mend things with my parents, too, but I didn't give them that opportunity. I feel like I chose the selfish route not including them.""Do you wish you had done something differently? You know we don't have to tell anyone we tied the
When the plane touched down in Greenville, Annie and I turned our phones back on for the first time in over a week. We had promised each other we wouldn't allow any outside distractions to mar our trip, and being out of the country made that easy to explain before we left. Once on the road, she looked at me. "Do you think it's safe to check the messages at this point?" Her face was tainted with worry."Sweetheart, your friends will not be mad at you. Plus, they don't even know anything yet. Are you trying to avoid the confrontation? Is that why you aren't checking your phone?" She nodded her reply."Who are you most afraid of telling?""My mom and dad," she stated plainly. "Things between us have been strained for years. This may be the final nail in the coffin. The sad thing is you're exactly what they always wanted for me." I'd met her parents when we'd run into them one night, but it was only briefly, and neither had shown much interest. We'd all wanted to go in separate di
Anticipating jet lag and the overwhelming fatigue that comes from vacation, we had planned the trip and time off work so we had one more day before returning to our daily grind. At that point, Annie's friends knew she was back in town. They had laid low yesterday. We got in late afternoon, and they gave her some space. But as soon as the sun came up this morning, her phone wouldn't stop ringing. First, it was Jenny, then Lynn, followed by Scarlett, all of them wanting details. I felt for her. I had sent my friends a text message last night saying we'd gotten married. They each said congrats or some other guy form of the word, but none really cared. They had all known it was coming and knew Annie was it for me. Guys were just different that way. I think they all appreciated not having to sit through a ceremony or buy a gift.She grunted a frustrated moan as she rolled over to face me. "I guess I just need to get this over with."I held her to my chest while she sent a group text to
Our story didn't stop at the courthouse. We had dinner with Brett and Annie that night and hovered around their kitchen table. My best friends allowed me to share Joshua with them and gave life to his memory. I showed them the only pictures I still had while holding Alissa in my arms. She smiled up at me as if she knew. That tiny human connected with me on a level she may never understand, but somehow, she knew-without Joshua, she wouldn't be here. Watching her run around with her friends as we celebrated her birth five years later, I couldn't help but think how foolish it would have been to walk away from all of this. Dan and I would never have children, but what we had was far better for us. Annie and Brett were more like siblings than friends, and their kids were amazing. We got to spoil them, take them anywhere we wanted, and send them home. We had family at holidays and special occasions, and we never missed out on anything either Grayson or Alissa were doing. But at the end of
I had called repeatedly, but each try had gone straight to voicemail. Either his phone was off, or it died without being charged overnight. I didn't want to speculate about which it was. I drove as quickly as I could and slammed the SUV in park in the first spot I could find before racing into the courthouse. I followed the signs to the Justice of the Peace, but when I reached the office, completely out of breath, Dan was nowhere to be found. The clock on the wall read 10:11 am. My eyes scanned the room, making sure to identify each person as a stranger before moving on to the next face. Surely, he hadn't left after ten minutes. He had to know I'd come. A guy slammed into my shoulder in his haste to rush out of the office, not even bothering to apologize for nearly knocking me over. But standing stock-still in the middle of the doorway probably wasn't the best idea. I just couldn't believe he'd left. I waited for hours for Matt to show up at the hospital, but Dan hadn't waited ten lo
My night had been restless, and just as quiet as the evening after Dan and I had gotten out of the bathtub. He left after dinner and went to Brett's house, but I didn't have the courage to ask him what he'd done while he was there. He returned in the same mood he'd left in, the one he was known for. To an outsider, he appeared unwavering-but I knew with time to think about it, he'd decide he couldn't stay."Did you want to get a new dress for tomorrow?" "For what?""To go to the courthouse? Or do you want to do the whole thing off the wall and wear jeans?" He kept unloading the dishwasher like he had asked what I needed from the grocery store. "I didn't think we were still doing that?" Maybe he'd taken up drinking.He turned toward me suddenly, dropping a dishtowel he'd used to dry his hands with. "What are you talking about? You said Monday. Tomorrow is Monday.""Dan...""No, don't Dan me. Has something changed that you don't want to marry me now?"Oh, for the love of God. I
I stood in the spot he left me in when he returned with towels from the dryer. He set them on the counter, turned off the water in the now full tub, and removed his clothes. I watched in a trance until he was before me with nothing on. With my hand in his, he stepped over the side of the bathtub and then helped me in. The garden tub was made for two, and I nestled myself between his legs while he leaned back. The bubbles created a cover, hiding our bodies except for the parts of us not under the water. My fingers fidgeted nervously with the white foam until he took my hand and wound his fingers between mine.He might have been waiting for me to start, but I didn't know what to say. The silence was painful, and I ran through the scenarios of how this might play out...none of which ended well."What was his name?" The words of inquiry fanned out against my skin like a warm blanket. They were gentle and softly spoken, inviting me to open up about a piece of me I hadn't shared with anyon
We walked into the sanctuary with two minutes to spare. Brett quickly found Dan, and Annie was in a tizzy. Alissa was nestled into a cradle her dad had created with his arm completely unaffected by her father's helpless panic. "Dude, slow down. What's wrong?"I held Dan's hand in front of Brett, but Alissa had my attention. Just as Brett started to answer Dan's question, Annie came around the corner. Her face was flush, and if I had to bet, I'd say she was roughly two minutes from pulling her hair out.I hadn't heard anything Brett said to my fiancé. The moment Annie got close enough, I saw why she was distressed. Grayson had spit up all over his christening gown...and it stunk, even from here.People started to fill the pews. "What do you need me to do, Annie?"Brett stepped in, suddenly relieved and in control. "Nothing. We're good. Dan went to get stuff out of the car."My brow scrunched in confusion. I had no idea what was going on or how Dan was helping."Seriously, Lissa.
The time on my phone couldn't be right. There was no way it was a quarter to eight. Somehow in my haste to get to sleep I either hadn't turned on my alarm or had turned it off an hour ago when it rang. I threw the covers back and practically fell out of bed. The thud of my body on the floor woke Dan whose concern, while well intended, only slowed my progress out the door."Let me go. I have fifteen minutes to get to Annie's house, and I had planned to shower before I went."He didn't relinquish his grasp on me once he got up. "Lissa, calm down. You aren't going to do anyone any good in a panic." I relaxed until I felt the tension in his arms subside and then made my break. "I'll be back. Can you get the gifts out of the closet and throw them in the bags on the kitchen counter? There's tissue paper there, too.""Sure, where are they?"I raced around tearing my pajamas off to put on a bra and some real clothes. As much as I loved Brett, I wasn't interested in him seeing any more of
"You look like shit, Lissa. Did you have a baby that keeps you up at night, and I missed it?"I swung my attention to Annie to find her giggling to herself. "You don't look so hot yourself, heifer." The wink I shot her direction ensured she saw my playfulness. "I haven't slept all that well the last couple nights." I didn't need to tell her why."Bad dreams?" She'd become a pro at this whole parenting gig. She never missed a beat with either kid and managed to hold completely coherent, adult conversations while breastfeeding one and changing the other. Anyone else would need more hands but not Annie Ryann. "I don't know what it is. Just not getting a lot of rest."She stopped what she was doing and gave me the eye. The one that told me she didn't believe a word I said. I scooped Alissa up and ignored her."Spill it.""There's nothing to spill. I'm just not sleeping well.""Are you nervous about getting married?"Her question was natural, based on the fact that event loomed jus
I'd spent most of the summer with Annie, Alissa, and Grayson while Dan and Brett worked. As my vacation neared its end, I got excited about returning to work. I couldn't wait to be around my students again and the music. I dreaded seeing Rob, but hopefully, he'd be somewhat human now that some time had passed. I hadn't heard from him in the time I'd been off except for the email he sent out to the department today about meetings over the next couple weeks. It would be strange being away from the kids. Annie and I were more like co-mothers, with her taking the lead and the long nights. But I'd spent several of those with her as well. I knew how exhausting one infant was...I couldn't leave her alone with two, and Brett still had to work. Maybe it was an excuse to feel like I was an important part of their lives and their team. Maybe it gave me a piece of what I'd lost years earlier. Either way, I found myself having to be pried away from them. When I told Annie to let me know if I got
The addition of Alissa Danielle to our tribe had been profound. I loved being able to walk across the driveway to relieve my friend in the morning so she could shower, take a nap, or whatever else she was in the mood to do. I didn't care what it was. I'd help her with laundry, cleaning, anything to keep her from experiencing the sleep deprivation that had caused the end of the world I knew. It was twice as bad for her because with each passing day, she became more pregnant and less able to move...or stay awake. I took advantage of the time she granted me with Alissa and tried to maintain the bond the two of us shared. I knew it would change over time, but I hoped as she grew older it would strengthen in different ways. I wanted to be her friend, her confidant, her second mom. In the few weeks she'd been alive, Dan and I both had fallen head over heels for her. But at the end of each day, we got to go next door, have sex as loudly as we wanted to, stay out until all hours of the night