She is Not A Bitch.

Although Melinda had me smiling like a five-year-old, I still found it hard to sleep.

I was still wallowing in depressive thoughts. The scene where I put an end to the life of my father was still playing and replaying in my head like a broken record, and I couldn't do anything to stop it.

The guilt and fear that followed the thoughts of my father's death were overwhelming, and I struggled to come to terms with my actions and their consequences. I couldn't shake the feeling that somehow, I was being punished for the terrible deed I had committed.

But I asked myself again, ‘Was this what the moon goddess meant when she said, “death must be earned, as much as life?” Have I been cursed to keep wandering the earth without a certain purpose, like Cain, who was cursed to be a fugitive, wandering the surface of the earth, because he slayed his brother?”

Yeah, maybe I have been cursed, maybe I have not been cursed, but the reality is that I’ve had to wander the woods, like a fugitive. Althou