Chapter 1

Arabella pov

"You're getting married next week, so prepare," he said casually, as if discussing the weather and not the fate of my entire life.

I stared at him, shocked, while finding it hard to process his words.

"Married? How? Why? Next week?". I asked, trying to make sense to all that he had said

He continued eating while ignoring my questions, and then he said

"Pass the sauce, this meal is bland."

I tried to play calm, as I passed him the sauce. This was what he always did, taking up decisions about my life, without bothering to let me have a say in it, i turned to my mom, hoping for an explanation from her, but her lips were set in a thin, disapproving line, which wasn't shocking as she was against me questioning my father's decisions.

After a few minutes of silence and no explanation from anyone, I summoned courage and I asked again, trying to sound polite. "But why am I getting married so soon? I haven't even had a chance to—"

Before I could say another word, my mother's sharp palm hit against my cheek cut me off, her eyes blazing with anger and irritation

. "How dare you question your father?" she hissed.

The pain of my mother's slap against my cheek was painful but the true pain was the familiar sense of helplessness that washed over me, I barely tried to hold my tears. In this family , my wants and needs were always subject to the standard of my parents, they barely cared for what I wanted .

"Is it my life you're all talking about?" The words came out suddenly , an outburst that had been long overdue. I was simply tired of being controlled, or having my future dictated by those who claimed to know what was best.

“ I have the right to know what exactly I'm getting into, don't I?" I asked, while barely holding the tears from falling.

My father suddenly got up from the table, his chair scraped the floor with an unpleasant grate,and his gaze shifted to me.

"Do you now feel you have the right to question my decisions?" He said, as he came closer to me "Or do you think I owe you an explanation?" he asked while his gaze still on me

I swallowed hard, my throat suddenly dry, unable to look him in the eye.

"You're getting married, and that's final," he spat, the words laced with a finality that left no room for argument. With that, he turned and stormed out of the dining room.

"Then let it be over my dead body," I said wondering where I got the courage to say such words.

“ I can not…”

My mother's voice cut through my words,

"Then die, you useless child," she hissed. "The day you killed my son, the heir to my husband's business, was the day you lost any value to me. The least you can do now is save the family by getting married." she said, while she walked out.

I felt the air leave my lungs, the weight of her words crushing me with the realization that she still held a grudge against me, for the death of Ryder. I collapsed into the dining chair, for my legs were barely able to carry me. It had been a very long morning, and I was tired of everything, I barely could process the fact that I would be getting married next week.

I tried to control the tears that streamed from my eyes and down to my cheeks. I didn't bother to wipe them away, letting them fall,my body shook with sobs, my chest heaving as I struggled to catch my breath. The room around me blurred, and all I could focus on was the thought that my mom still blamed me for Ryder's death. Had I not insisted on going on the field trip, Ryder might not have come to pick me up and he might still be alive. Perhaps it was my fault, which I have been made to pay for, but for too long, no amount of suffering could ease my dad's hurt and my mom's grief, since that day not only did I lose Ryder but also my parents and me, as we all died,when Ryder died.

I didn't want to be consumed by the thoughts of Ryder's death, as I had more pressing matters to face and I couldn't think about it in the dining room. So I managed to push myself up from the dining chair.

As I reached my room and slammed the door shut behind me, I collapsed on the bed, while burying my face in my pillow, and letting the tears flow, I was angry at everybody and everything. I wept for Ryder, for my parents, and for the life we once had. I cried for the loss and the pain that still lingered.

Just as I thought I'd found some peace and quietness in my room, I heard the door creak open slightly. It was my mom who was standing at the doorway, her eyes cold as she said

"The business is collapsing, and marriage is the only way to save it. It's going to happen with or without your say , and you better play along, as this is the least you can do for us."

I looked at her and all I could feel was anger and resentment, as she was willing to sacrifice me, to use me as a pawn in her game, just like she had always done. I looked away as she left, I was really tired of everything, the fight and the silent treatment she gave to me.

If getting married to a person I don't even know will ease my parents' anger then so be it. After all this was what I have been trained for all my life, maybe getting married might not be that bad, I could finally get rid of the memories of Ryder.