Chapter 4

 The Wedding 

Abby's Pov 

The bristles of the foundation brush were gentle against my skin as it moved over my cheek. 

But beneath the soft touch, I felt raw like a nerve that was exposed and every movement served as a reminder of the internal storm that was raging in me.

The makeup artist who was unaware of the turmoil in my chest smiled as she did my makeup.

I wanted to run and hide, to wish this marriage of a thing was a prank by my parents and Nathaniel.

Wish i had gone to law school when I had the chance, by now I won't be forced into a marriage i had no interest in.

"Close your eyes , Ma'am ." She said in a sweet and professional tone. Smiling as she did my makeup, loving her job and thinking I love it too.

I obeyed , fluttering my lashes shut but the voices in my head, drowning my fears and sadness. I wasn't supposed to be safe. Today was my wedding.

Though it wasn't the kind of wedding I had dreamed as a child, getting married to someone I love but I had to do with this 

I was doing it for my family and it was all thst mattered.

The memories of the night before, Fred and my cousin kept crashing into my head again and again, making m eyes water.

I was bleeding dry from the memories which were like knives each .

I would never forgive any of them for what they had done to me for the betrayal.

My jaw clenched as I resisted the memories that were trying to surface—Fred's smug smile, the tangled sheets and her stuttering excuses. 

"You look beautiful." The artist whispered her fingers lingering on my temple for a moment  

I smiled,the corners of my lips shaking as I muttered." Thank you." In a voice that I couldn't believe 

A picture I didnt recognize was staring at me in the mirror in front of me. a bride. 

The woman staring back at me was covered in layers of stitched fabric and ivory lace. 

My makeup looked perfect with my lips painted the softest shade of pink, my rosy cheeks and shimmering eye lids. 

Perfect. the image of joy. That would be anyone's thought if they had seen me now.

Even though I tried to smile, I was deceived by my eyes. 

The pain I was unable to speak out loud , was seen in those dark hollow pools.

 As she leaned in to adjust my veil , one of the bridesmaids chirped .

"You're breathtaking ."

 I remained silent. The word " Thank you ." I wanted to scream weighed down my tongue and my chest burned, I wasn't happy that I was getting married to Nathaniel.

The elaborate beading on the gown glittered mockingly in the sunlight, pouring through the suites large windows, as it tightened around my ribs like a robes. I was a pretty bride, but I would be pretty and happy if I was getting married to a man I loved and Fred hadn't cheated on me.

It appeared as though every pearl om my dress and crystal echoed the same taunt, telling me I was going to be trapped in this marriage forever.

My mother came sweeping into the room .

She smiled at me." Smile, Abigail, you are so pretty."

 Her navy gown was spotless with each pleat expertly ironed. 

She was too focused on examining the bouquet in her hands to even look at me while she was speaking

"I'm happy ." I lied my fingers gripping the chairs armrest until my knuckles went white 

In frustration she let out a sigh and gave the flowers to a nearby attendant.

 "Don't be sad Abigail , fulfill your responsibilities. Dont make us look foolish. Do this for your father and I." She whispered to me.

 She was only concerned with that. Not the fact that I was being herded like a lamb to the slaughter , getting married to pay a debt and help the company rise from bankruptcy.

She shook her head before leaving,e clicking the door behind her and I was left alone inside with the muffled hum of preparations. 

With my breath caught in my throat, I gazed at my reflection. In my mind Fred's face appeared out of nowhere

 The way his eyes wrinkled when he laughed, his crooked smile and the assurances he whispered into my hair late at night, promises that have since lost all meaning. 

I was surprised to hear the question which jolted me back to reality."Are you ready?"

 Admiring her work , the makeup artist stepped back and cocked her head.

 "Yes,I am." I said, the word tasting strange on my tongue  

My father was standing in the doorway when she moved aside , he had been discharged days ago and was looking so strong for someone who had been hospitalized.

His voice was steady but rough as he called.

" Abigail. "

His eyes were hard as they scanned my entire body and his expression was unreadable. " You look beautiful and presentable."

Presentable? as if I was a goods or service that could be traded. 

 With my gowns weight almost dragging me back down, I stood up on wobbly legs. 

My father extended his arm and after a brief moment of hesitation I accepted it. 

He led me down the grand staircase and out of the room with a firm almost punishing grip. 

We got into the car and in minutes we were at the church.

As we got closer, the guests turned to stare at us and their murmurs became louder inside. 

The first notes of the organ echoed through the air as the doors opened and I felt every chord vibrate in my chest. 

As we started the slow march down the aisle , my fathers hold became more firm. 

The faces blended together smiling at us, but I was unable to concentrate on any of them

Nathaniel stared at us,his expression was unreadable, his fitted suit was spotless and he was as calm as ever.

 For an instant I thought I saw something when his dark eyes met mine , but it was quickly replaced by the steely indifference I had grown used to seeing from him. 

Was it regret? Sympathy? .

With a curt nod to Nathaniel , my father let go of my arm as I got at the altar. 

The officiant started speaking but my mind was so busy that his words were just a dull hum in my ears. 

 Nathaniel's hand touched mine, his hold firm but gentle. 

"I, Nathaniel Graham take Abigail Harper as my lawfully wedded wife." He recited his vows non chalantly.

 Then it was my turn. With eager eyes the officiant turned to face me. 

The room was filled with suffocating silence with every eye on me. 

My voice trailed off barely audible .

"I…. " I forced the words out while clearing my throat." I ,Abigail Harper take you Nathaniel Graham to be my legally wedded husband. "

Mechanical and hollow , the remaining vows fell from my mouth. 

Every word was like a shackle drawing me closer to a life I didnt choose. 

"Now you can kiss the bride." The officiant said.

Before he leaned in, Nathaniel paused looking into my eyes for a moment.

 Softly , his lips touched mine as a formality rather than a proclamation.

 It was a cruel celebration of my surrender and the crowd began to clap loudly.

The reception was a kaleidoscope of lights , forced smiles and laughter that slipped through me. 

As I cut the cake , performed the first dance and accepted congratulations from people I hardly knew.

I could feel Fred's name hovering around the edge of my mind .

 His hands entwined in her hair and his voice pleading with me to understand him were still vivid in my mind. 

Though he had cheated on me, but a part of me still loved .

I felt so tired as the night went on.

 Nathaniel stuck by my side serving as a continual reminder of the decision I made. A decision, I could no longer escape from.

 He seems to know do many people and I got tired as we spoke to some Ms y people.

Soon , it was time to head home and I sigh in relief.

At last we were all alone in the car, his face briefly shadowed by the city lights. The driver taking us home.

 Nathaniel's hands were on his knees and his jaw clenched , he gazed straight ahead like I didn't exist.

" Are you happy now?" I said in a small voice.

 He ignored me. "Is this really necessary?

The words were bitter and heavy as they hung between us.

 I turned away and pressed my forehead against the windows cool glass. 

The world outside continued on unconcerned about my suffering.

 I was choking inside, drowning under the burden of a life I had lost sight of.

 I wished I could go back on the vows, wished nothing had happened to dad's company.

I sighed, this was my fate now and I had to accept it.