Blame

I stared at her, shocked by the cruelty of her words. All the pent-up frustration and anger I'd been holding back threatened to burst forth. But before I could respond, I noticed her wheelchair seemed stuck on something.

Without thinking, I bent down to check the wheels. It was then that I felt a hard shove against my back.

I stumbled forward, my arms pinwheeling, desperately afraid to fall on my stomach. Time seemed to stand still as I pulled myself upright and watched in horror as Charlotte's wheelchair began to speed down the hill. Charlotte's high-pitched scream caused time to snap back into real time. I ran after her as fast as I could trying to catch her, my legs feeling like lead, my lungs burning as I gasped for air.

But it was too late. The wheelchair hit a rock and tipped, sending Charlotte tumbling to the ground. As I finally reached her, my breath coming in ragged gasps, I saw blood on her forehead. I reached for her instinctively. And then I heard Leonard's horrified voice, filled with more emotion than I'd heard in years.

"Charlotte!" he cried, running towards us. When he reached us, he glared at me, his eyes filled with a fury I had never seen before. "What have you done?"

“N-nothing. It was an accident. I-I tried…” my attempt at an explanation died in my throat as he shoved me away from Charlotte and I fell to the ground again. Shock froze my limbs. Leonard had never laid a hand on me before.

In that moment, as I lay there on the ground with my husband's accusing eyes boring into me, I realized a painful truth. No matter what happened, no matter what Charlotte did or said, Leonard would always choose her over me.

And as I watched him tenderly lift her into his arms, murmuring words of comfort, I felt something inside me finally break. The last fragile thread of hope I had been clinging to snapped, leaving me adrift in a sea of despair.

As Leonard carried Charlotte back to the house, her arms wrapped tightly around his neck, my husband didn’t even spare me a backward glance. But Charlotte did. A small smile played on her lips as she looked at me over my husband's shoulder. I couldn't do anything but stare back, my heart breaking.

As the rest of the family surrounded them with outcries of concern, I remained rooted to the spot next to Charlotte’s empty wheelchair. The day that had started out beautiful and bright was suddenly cold and gray, a perfect reflection of the desolation I felt inside.

I limped to one of the multiple garden benches that lined the path, trying to come to grips with what had just happened. As I sat there alone with storm clouds suddenly blowing in seeming to mirror the turmoil in my heart, my phone vibrated in my pocket. Matthew, my brother. I debated not answering it. I really couldn't deal with one more thing, and a call from Matthew was almost always about some drama he had gotten himself into. A feeling of unease separate from the current events niggled in my consciousness.

"Matthew, now is not a good time..." I answered but then my brother's voice crackled through the speaker, his words hitting me like a punch to the gut.

"Claire, it's Mom. She fell in the bathroom. I think she hit her head. There was so much blood! They've rushed her to the hospital."

As the words sank in, a sharp pain lanced through my belly. My hand instinctively flew to my abdomen. Oh God, the baby. Charlotte's, then Leonard's push... had it...?

"I'll be there as soon as I can, Matthew."

With trembling fingers, I dialed Leonard's number as I rose. Please pick up, please don't have left yet. The phone rang and rang, but there was no answer. The pain intensified, and I found myself doubling over. Glancing up, the house seemed so far away. I started to cut across the yard, moving as fast as I could with the pain intensifying. I choked down a sob.

One thought crystallized in my mind - I needed to get to the hospital. Now. If I could just get to the hospital, everything would be alright.

Moving as quickly as I could manage, I stumbled towards the driveway just as a familiar car almost collided with me. Leonard. And Charlotte's blonde hair in the passenger seat. My heart clenched, another kind of pain joining the physical one.

I scanned the empty driveway desperately. Where was everyone? The pain was getting worse, and fear clawed at my throat.

"Help," I whispered, my voice barely audible even to my own ears. "Someone, please. My baby..."