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26. Ivan
Last Updated:
2024-10-29 19:42:56
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The Beta's Prize 27. Cherish
Martha left me in the linen cupboard for most of the day. I can’t stand to be anywhere else. The room is the only area with happy memories. The smell of clean laundry, Genevieve's laugh, the complete absence of shifters. I try to mourn for her but I realise I am mourning a ghost. My grief is for the friendship I imagine we could have had. By the time I came out it was dark and Martha was locking up. She gave me a sad smile and wrapped her arm around me. “Tomorrow you can help me, I am sorry for today, it’s been tough losing her when she fought so hard to get through her first month.” We chatted soberly as we headed back towards my room. Ivan would surely be there so I made sure to pull on my gloves before we got back. Martha noticed, but she said nothing, just absorbed it all with her eager brown eyes. I am sure she thought I would be stripping off for Ivan, not adding layers. It was so late by the time I arrived back at the room Ivan was already in bed asleep. Or at least pretendi
The Beta's Prize 28. Ivan
Kohl had wailed at me the instant I withdrew my lips from her soft skin. He was drunk on the sparks, a whirling frenzy of activity in my mind as I softly roamed from up by her ear down to her collarbone. It felt like falling. The more I gently nuzzled and nipped her the more dangerous it felt. Like a tightrope walk, a few more seconds and I would have spun her around and devoured her where she stood. But I can’t. I won’t. I must master my wolf’s urges. Just because Kohl is desperate for me to get closer to her doesn’t mean it’s the right thing to do. Even though her eyes have that pink sparkle, and her skin seems to taste of red berries. Her wolf is emerging. Which means she is potentially not herself right now. Leaving her standing there in the room and flinging myself back into bed took serious willpower. Every sinew in my body wanted more, but I did it. I proved my point that she is a shifter and here I am alone in bed. My own eyes are blazing in desire, trying to pretend I di
The Beta's Prize 29. Cherish
I woke up in Ivan’s arms, in his huge white bed. Entwined together the sparks were altogether softer when not driven by pure lust. WIth the bright light of dawn forcing its way through the small window I gazed at his face. When sleeping the firmness, the constant pretence he was someone fearsome was gone. His jaw was chiselled, his lips friendly. I knew he could smile, I needed to see it more. His hair, so russet-red, almost like a fox with coppery fiery tones that shone fascinatingly brightly. His eyes might be shut but they were already imprinted in my memory. His lively green, emerald eyes, full of friendly intentions and kindness. Then when they shimmered with gold and all his desires were laid bare. I shuddered in his arms remembering how I had almost heard his control snap when I finally got into his arms again. His face down there, the hungry way he had taken me, it was an intense combination of Ivan and his wolf. Using my femininity to tease him into action was not somethin
The Beta's Prize 30. Cherish
I am back in my dreams, travelling through the woodland. Everything is bright and fresh, the air smells like it has rained. That deeply earthy, pure scent that warms your soul. I notice my feet are bare as I ascend the path, a plain white cotton dress down to my ankles. I have never owned such an item before, yet it seems so familiar. I am walking towards the sun, still low in the morning sky. Unlike my other dreams I can take in every detail. There is a delicate gold bangle on my wrist, it moves along my arm as I walk. Climbing further up the hill I find myself breathing harder, taking in lungs full of the crisp air, but I am not tired. Every breath seems to recharge my energy. Finally, the last few tall pine trees are cleared, and I reach the top of the hill. The grassy space that I have returned to almost every night since being given to Ivan. Ahead of me are pine trees to the west, huge expanses of lakes and valleys to the east. The small brown and white wolf is there too, patie
The Beta's Prize 31. Ivan
I don’t know if I will ever be able to forgive myself. Or Martha for that matter. Why the hell was Cherish out there alone? Has everyone lost their minds and forgotten the depraved, psychotic people that lurk around every single door? The guards work here because they are frustrated drunks with gambling debts, the men fight to death here because they have no choice. The ones who do like fighting such as Denton, Shay, Maxwell, and Philo are deviants of the worst kind. Denton appears to have gathered himself a crew of like-minded bastards. He strokes his black beard and tells them the best way to torture an opponent, man or woman and they look on like he is a deity. Death holds no meaning for them anymore, their kicks come only from causing pain to others. All of them are hugely fearsome men, eager to build further muscles through over-eager grunting and lifting in the gymnasium. Seeing as nearly every prize is already dead after less than a week, they have only exercise to vent thei
The Beta's Prize 32. Ivan
Cherish remained in the infirmary whilst I was segregated from the team. Anxious days ached by. Encased in my small room I paced like a wild animal. The fear of her succumbing to her injuries plagued me constantly. I had no information, nobody came near my door as though my fall from grace was as catchable as flu. The anger at how Cherish had fallen prey to them ate me up. I barely ate or slept, hearing nothing, either from the infirmary or from Vincent. She couldn't be dead. I know Martha would have at least told me that somehow. I hope so. I also knew I still had to take my punishment. Perhaps I would be dead before she recovered. Killing a fellow teammate was probably more disliked by Vincent and Kingsley than Denton’s abduction of Cherish. Finally I was summoned. A smirking Kingsley tapped at my door, surrounded by guards toting stun guns. He had left it four days, building up the anticipation of just how horrifically he intended to make me pay for damaging his "product". The
The Beta's Prize 33. Cherish
When I finally woke, I was terrified I har somehow been transported back home. The dark, musty surroundings, the smell of too many bodies in a small bleak space made it all flood back. For a second I panicked that everything had been in a dream, until my vision cleared and I realised the dark, windowless room was unfamiliar and the woman gently dousing my head with a soaked sponge was Martha. “You made it,” she whispered, a sad smile on her creased face. Her brown eyes scoured mine, though I had no idea what she was searching for. “I have no idea how, but you did.” “My wolf,” I whispered weakly, “we met,” as I sipped from a cup of water. Martha clasped her hand to her chest. “Now if that is not the hand of Fate, the very Moon Goddess herself in action I do not know what is! To bond with your wolf, to gain shifter healing in the very instant you needed it to survive? Blessings indeed!” It was too much to think about right now. All I knew was I had never felt such hunger. My stomac
The Beta's Prize 34. Ivan
Kohl had been working overtime since Martha told us Cherish was returning. I slept for longer than I ever thought possible whilst he worked to repair my damaged flesh. Shifter healing can only do so much, I woke to find myself stiff, aching, and still covered in bandages. I managed to get myself something to eat and have a wash before crashing out on the bed again, my back facing towards the ceiling. I was sound asleep when the crashing of Cherish bursting through the door woke me. She didn’t have to say a word, I knew it was her from the scent of berries that drifted across the air plus the way Kohl leapt to attention. He must have been exhausted from healing me, yet he was as active as a puppy in her presence. “Ivan,” she whispered as I heard her footsteps patter along the wooden floor. The mattress sank as she lowered herself. I was swiftly confronted by the overwhelmingly gorgeous image of her blue eyes and blonde-framed oval face staring at me from the other pillow. My eyes sea
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The Beta's Prize Epilogue 6: White Forest Ball (Cillian)
Without thinking I shouted “Stop!” causing the cloaked person to sprint. “GUARDS!” I screeched, unable to mind-link members outside of my pack. Why was the entire fucking castle asleep! Sprinting after the cloaked figure I saw nobody else, no guards, not even a servant to help me catch the stranger. Arriving at the huge foyer of the castle, surrounded by flickering torches, hanging tapestries and miserable grey stone walls I had nothing to follow. They had vanished into thin air. All I knew from the build around the cloak was that they were a man, a man wearing long black trousers. Giving up the chase, I headed back to my room, flights of stairs, leading me to nothing but duplicating corridors of arched doorways, presumably student accommodation. The door to my parents’ suite remained open. “Papa?” I knocked softly to no answer. /Cillian, I am so sorry/ Vez said, realising before I did that my world had been knocked from its axis, shattered like porcelain. On the double bed, wrappe
The Beta's Prize Epilogue 5: White Forest Ball (Cillian)
I understood immediately why Papa never took us to many of these charades. Standing there in a pompous white shirt, on display like a prize pig at a fair I was happy to escape with Genevieve into the masses. I wasn’t so happy about Nikolai. We had only met briefly during a few childhood meetings but as a man he oozed anger and resentment. What for, I have no idea, but my sister and her wide eyes clearly thought it was the hottest thing she had ever seen. Silently, from my chosen distance, I watched his charisma overwhelm her, my own heckles rising. /She asked you to let her be an adult, to make her own choices/ Vez urged. Ever since first shifting and Vez came into my world it has been like having two fathers, both eager for me to prosper as Alpha. Our wolf fur was as red and fiery as my hair. I cringed, remembering how Jackson had laughingly called me the Infant Inferno, leaving me furious. Vez however, despite our fiery colour was sage, calming and fair. My papa tried to downpl
The Beta's Prize Epilogue 4: White Forest Ball (Genevieve)
Having to walk in behind my parents I felt like a child amongst women. Despite the stunning dress, the styled hair and jewels I’d been given, the ballroom had a strange feel about it. I felt watched ,studied, but not in the usual way, like at home in Cragstone when crowds gathered. One person’s gaze had me flustered. The smell of burning spice made my eyes widen in fear, urgently seeking out the owner. As though we were in danger of attack, then I saw Nikolai Romanov. He headed up towards our little royal enclosure furtively, as though he was breaking in. He was just as entitled to be there as the rest of us and yet his fearsomely dark eyes were stuck on me. He offered no greetings to anyone else, not even his parents. My heart flipped, what do you do when someone looks so blatantly at you? He wasn’t undressing me with his eyes or anything crude like the silly Kharkov boys. Instead, he was seriously, steadily looking at me as a person. Almost the same age as me, already nineteen and
The Beta's Prize Epilogue 3: White Forest Ball (Ivan)
I know exactly why she is nervous. It’s not ideal and we’ve put it off for so long that it’s brought the formal gold bordered letter from Alexander to force our attendance. They are so young, the twins are barely even adults. If they find their mates tonight there it is more complicated than they realise. For Kharkov’s girls, or Lyon’s boys, when they make their match it will be a simple case of falling in love and finding a place to live and be happy together. Our children, should it be from a rival pack, will see alliances drawn up, decisions taken out of their hands as their parents become a tangle of wants and wishes. Should my beautiful, delicate little Genevieve be drawn in with that dark-haired lout Nikolai, what then? He is the future Alpha of White Forest, as Freya is to live in Rising Star. I would lose my darling girl. I know it is just the mindset of a scared father. I am a proud, happy man, terrified of nothing the world can throw at me. Except for damaging my family'
The Beta's Prize Epilogue 2: White Forest Ball (Cherish)
I gasped at the sight of our intruder. Cillian, my beautiful boy, had somehow transformed into a powerful, charismatic man, his white shirt open at the top showing the sculpted chest he inherited from his father. His coppery red hair had an even fierier tone than Ivan’s, almost sheer red, whilst his eyes had eventually turned blue like my own, despite starting green. He had a strong, masculine jaw and his figure had developed over the past year. He had trained like a beast with Kharkov and Jackson, as if preparing for his mate by getting into perfect shape. “Are we ready to do this parade then?” he grumbled, fiddling with his cufflink, the rasping depth of his manly voice still making me wistful even after years of it breaking. “How has a white shirt made you look this grown up,” I said softly, adjusting the collar of his shirt whilst he towered over me and his father. The squidgy faced little boy who hid behind my skirts clutching stacks of buns he had stolen from Martha was no m
The Beta's Prize Epilogue 1: White Forest Ball (Cherish)
** TWENTY YEARS LATER ** “I cannot believe it has truly been so long since we were last at White Forest,” I murmured, standing in the same suite we had used so many years ago. Back when I shouted at Helena and suggested she had failed Ivan. The four-poster bed and stained glass windows were unchanged. As if we had simply stepped back in time. The sight of the balcony, where I had once stood in only a black cloak for Ivan to devour under the pale blue moonlight made me smile and Halo purr in remembrance. “You are as amazing now as you were then,” Ivan murmured, approaching me with a grin. In his late forties he was getting somehow even more handsome with age. His hair remained the stunning copper beacon I looked for first in every room whilst his frame remained strong, tall and muscular. Although my heart had two other beacons to contend with in Genevieve and Cillian, Ivan’s strength was the tree which my roots had grown around. They had turned eighteen last winter, Ivan insiste
The Beta's Prize 106. Cherish
Although Ivan’s silly trick with the balcony made me laugh, we were soon back in the same glum mood we had left the dinner party with last night. The stone walls around us swirled with confusion, the footsteps of unknown servants constantly pattering by made me feel watched, edgy. At home, in Cragstone we knew exactly who roamed our smaller world. “We should just ask Helena outright,” I snapped in frustration, “they’re discussing us and our babies so why shouldn’t we know.” Ultimately we had the matter taken out of our hands. A small, elderly male servant summoned us for breakfast with Alpha Brandon and Luna Hollie down in the dining hall. Kissing the babies and leaving them with Kharkov and Penelope we made our way for attempt Day Two of the so-called Conference. As expected the four of them were already there. Brandon raised his hand as soon as he saw us enter and saw Ivan assessing the situation. Alpha Alexander for once looked distressed. His cheeks were flushed and his eyes wer
The Beta's Prize 105. Ivan
My worst fears were confirmed. This wasn’t a proper conference, there was no respect for our attendance as the leaders of the Shadowlands pack, it was some ridiculous notion by Helena to try and fix her own ego. Kissing Cherish softly as she tended to the babies with Penelope I informed Kharkov I was heading for a stroll, he could stay with the women and enjoy some breakfast. His face lit up at the prospect, whether it was breakfast or the company of the women I could not tell which thrilled him more. I loved the fact he had such a bond with Cherish. Having someone in your corner like that, it’s how I used to see myself and Helena. Different but the same. /If everything had stayed the same, we would have been dead in a ditch long ago. Some things have to change/ Kohl murmured sagely. I agreed with him, but I still regretted my lost friendship. Heading out of the huge double doored stone archway I found myself looking down upon a splendid view of the surrounding forest. It was so
The Beta's Prize 104. Cherish
When the servant brought us into the dining hall it was just as grand as I expected. Huge golden candelabras and chandeliers lit up a picture perfect room. The usual tapestries and war scenes I had grown used to seeing at White Forest were not present here. Rising Star was a gallery of landscapes. The valleys, lakes and forests depicted everywhere gave the castle a softer feeling than I had expected this pile of stones to provide. Even the soft rugs were welcomely eyed by Halo, my feet still not fully healed made me want to jump to the nearest chair. I preferred this castle to White Forest, though as Halo warned me, that may just be because I had lingering reservations about Luna Helena and her knowledge of Fate. Ivan, bless him, knew my feet were not fully healed yet and made sure to have me seated comfortably before anything else. Alpha Brandon and Luna Hollie were kind and gracious hosts. They clearly adored Helena and Alexander, a cosy coupling that we were on the outside of.
