When every question was answered we were picked up by our guardians. Mr. Carter was one of the first ones to pick me up. He smiled at me and asked me to follow him. I did what I was told. We had to walk quite the distance. Not once had I opened my mouth.
We had to take a couple of turns and walked in several corridors. You could not see clearly what was behind all those doors you would see from time to time. Nowhere were any plates with directions on them. For a short moment, I wondered how people could work in such a place. This place felt like a maze. I would get lost within a few seconds.
When we had entered an elevator Mr. Carter asked me, "Are you okay, Alice? I know you have to process a lot of information. I'm happy to answer any questions." I didn't really want to talk but now everything had settled a bit I had some questions. "What are those tests the doctor talked about?"
Mr. Carter's face lit up and he responded, "Ah yes, the tests. We need to know everything about your body before conducting the procedure. So we need to make a couple of scans, do some blood and allergies tests, and going through your medical history. Also, a personality test will be taken, that way we can match you to the best suitable family for you."
I just nodded my head and again remained silent. When the doors opened we walked into a kind of waiting area with a desk. Behind it was a woman. "Good afternoon Miranda, how are you doing?" Mr. Carter asked the woman behind the desk.
She looked up, surprised, and answered, "Jim! Long time no see, I've been well, and you?"
"Good, good just doing my job, which leads me to my next question. Where do you have room for this lovely lady?" He asked while turning towards me.
"Let me see, what is your name sweetheart?" I looked up at the lady's face, it was warm and welcoming. "Alice Brown," I said lowly. She ticked onto her keyboard and looked at the screen in front of her. "Yes, I have a room for you, room number 203." She then took something and put it onto the counter, "Here is her wristband, and the rest of the things she needs are already prepared and waiting on her bed." Miranda said to Mr. Carter.
"Thank you, Miranda," and he took the wristband. He asked me to held up my wrist and so I did. It looked like the ones you get when you're in the hospital. It had my name, age, and a unique number on it.
I followed Mr. Carter through the long hallway. Almost at the end was my room. He stood in waiting by the door, to let me through first. I stepped into the room and looked around. It had four beds, two on each side. By the feet of the beds were bags, they all look the same. Next to each pillow was a little stuffed animal, all were different. Still looking around, I was startled by the voice of Mr. Carter. "If you look at the bags, you will find one with your number on it. The bag contains clothes, towels, and all the other necessities."
I walked up to the bags and found my number. My bed was on the left side next to the window. My view was quite depressing. It showed me an open yard where teenagers were hanging out. But it didn't look nice. It was all paved and another fence was around it, with a lot of security present. I wondered why.
You could see they have uniforms here. The boys wore light grey uniforms and girls light green. The uniforms were kind of prison uniforms, but they also reminded me of something you would wear in a hospital.
"I'll leave you, so you can get changed. When I come back I expect you to be changed and have your old clothes folded."
"Why do we need to wear this?" I asked while pointing at the uniform.
"We want you to completely disconnect with your old life so the clothes you wore there need to go," he explained. I didn't want to leave my hoodie as it was one of Alexander's but I guess I don't have a choice. He went away and I changed. Shortly after he came back and took the clothes from me.
"Try to settle in a bit, more will come this way soon. I'll see you again. Have a nice day." I just nodded my head and watched how he left the room. I sat down on the bed, took my stuffed animal in my hands, and sighed.
How will I survive this?
I looked around the room, once again. The walls were painted in white and light green, the same as our uniforms. Our bedsheets were a pastel yellow with light pink pillows. It truly felt like a child's bedroom.The stuffed animal I was holding felt soft against my hands. It was a blue elephant. I wondered why we all got stuffed animals if we were, as for now, still teenagers. Wouldn't it be more suitable to give these once we were babies?As I watched the soft animal rotating in my hands a strong feeling of sadness overwhelmed me. I missed my home, I missed my bedroom, my books, my own clothes. I even missed the presence of my parents. Maybe they weren't the greatest in showing their love for me, they were still my parents and I held a deep respect for them.But the thing I misse
"I don't want to talk about it.""Oh come on, don't be such a wuss," she whined again, "We all know that everybody here had a stupid home or did stupid themselves. I was a wild child, as my parents like to put it. I drank, smoked, hang out with the wrong crowd, didn't listen, got a tattoo, you know that kind of stuff. They were so done with me, they sent me here. And that goody-goody lady over there was the oldest of twelve children and when the twins came there wasn't enough money to take care of her so they signed her up. And they had this bullshit story about 'having a better childhood, a new way to get all the love you missed out on'. You know, so what's your story?"I felt bad for them that their parents were also the ones who got them here, but I was too afraid to tell them my story. They had endured so much, while
I felt someone grabbing my arm softly, bringing me back to reality. "Come let's go to your room." I heard Mr. Carter say. He had put his arm around my shoulder and led me back. He opened the door for me and I felt his arms sliding off my shoulders. He petted my head once and said, "Try to relax and have a good night of sleep." He then turned to Nancy and Lexi. "Girls, sleep tight. Don't stay up too long." I heard some murmuring coming from them and then the door behind me was closed.I headed to my bed and laid down. I grabbed my elephant, I couldn't care less right now what the girls would think. It gave me comfort and that was all I wanted. Hearing that your parents don't want you is way worse than them saying they want for you a second chance for a good childhood."Alice are you alright?" Lexi asked.
Before any of them could react any further at what I said a nurse came into the room."Ladies, I need you to come with me," the nurse said with a big friendly smile on her face. It looked like this was their trademark, their friendly faces."Where do we need to go?" Lexi asked."For your test, of course, I assumed they explained it to you yesterday, didn't they?""Yes they did miss, we forgot that's all," Nancy responded politely. You could see she was the responsible one of all of us. It didn't surprise me, if you have eleven younger siblings to take care of, you will need that sense of responsibility.We followed the nurse through the hallway to the elevator. When we entered there
The nurses had told us that we had to stay seated when lunch was over. Everybody looked around to see why. Nancy and Lexi had asked me if my guardian had said anything to me, but Mr. Carter had only told me to eat my lunch, so I didn't know either. Soon the head of the programme, Mary, came walking into the dining hall."Thank you for your patience boys and girls! Now, the reason why we kept you here longer than we normally do is that you all need to take the personality test. It's very simple, all of you get a set with forms, and on each one are multiple-choice questions. These questions are about you, fill in the answer you think fits your personality the most, the answer that describes you the best. We do this so we can match you with your new family. Remember there are no wrong answers! Good luck!"With that, she left the room and t
After a while, I heard Nancy and Lexi entering our room. I could hear that Lexi was upset about something. "I tell you they don't have the right to take away my tattoo. I swear I'll get one, just the same as this one when I'm sixteen again." Lexi complained."Lexi, I understand it will hurt, but maybe it's for the better. You once told me you didn't like your tattoo and with this, it will be removed for free!" Nancy said in an attempt to cheer Lexi up.I looked over my shoulder and for a second I saw sadness in Lexi's eyes, but it was already gone when she started to speak."I don't care, it's just not their decision to make. It's my body!" Lexi exclaimed.I heard a sigh, which was followed by, "I get you okay, but you can't stop it,
The next three days were horrible. All of the teenagers had to get three kinds of scans, an MRI, a CT, and a PET scan. Because they are short on equipment, we all had to wait for a long time. Nancy and I tried to keep ourselves busy with the board games, but after one day we were already done with them.So I was left alone with my thoughts. I couldn't help but think about my parents and brother. My brother would be at home by now. An image of him showed up in my head and the longing for him grew with the second. I missed his soothing voice, his funny jokes, and his comforting words. I had already missed him so much because he was gone so many times before I left the home.I wanted so desperately proof them I was good enough to stay in their family. I just needed time. Why couldn't they love me like my brother? Why did they never talk about their feelings? Why were they always so cold towards me?I heard from many teenagers that either their parents had sat
"But I thought I had to wait longer." I looked at him with a puzzled face. "Yes, but because of your attempt to escape they want you to go first."I didn't really know how to react. I knew I was prepared for the procedure, but it was hard to imagine myself as a baby again. Also, I wondered how much I would feel about it. Would I feel pain? Would I still understand my surroundings as I did now? There were so many questions I had put forward every day, but now it was too late.My worry was visible to Jim and he tried to calm me down. "Hey, no need to worry or to get scared. I'll be there until you fall asleep and I promise you won't feel any pain.""Promise?" I asked."I promise," with that he held a hand out for me to take. I took his hand and he led the way out of my room. Outside I was greeted with not two but three guards. Feeling intimidated by them I walked closer to Jim and clung to his arm. As we walked through the building we entered corridors I wa
15 years laterAlice p.o.vI was sitting on the pavement waiting for... I didn't know what for, I was just waiting. Hoping to see a glimpse of them. The weather was nice. I had put some music in my ears to ease my impatience.The reason why I was here was because of what my dads told me.It all started with a couple of innocent dreams. I saw myself but with different parents and a brother. I was often yelled at for doing nothing. I didn't understand the dreams as I couldn't decipher them.I thought they were just dreams or rather bad dreams.But the dreams felt so real and I knew it didn't happen to me. I had two dads, no siblings, and was raised with love. I absolutely loved my fathers. They would move mountains for me if I asked them.They made sure I had everything I needed and in return, I was always on my best behavior and got good grades, with help of course. Turned out I had dyslexi
James p.o.vI was now two days home, back from the hotel where I was staying. I felt like such an idiot. I had left with the thought I would punish Hadeon. So he could see how dependent a baby is on its parent. But after my rage was gone, after two days I was so afraid.Afraid of losing him and afraid of losing Alice. They were the only family I had.I thought Hadeon would never take me back. And to top it all I had smashed my phone against the wall the first night of my stay at the hotel. Therefore I couldn't call him. I was such an idiot.I felt so lost without him. Just when I had made up my mind to go home the next day Jim had called. I know it sounds very shady, but really I couldn't take it anymore being away from my husband and daughter. I needed them. They were my oxygen.So I was really glad I was home right now. I sat with Alice in my lap looking at cartoons. It felt great to have her in my arms again. I
Hadeon p.o.vI bounced my leg up and down as I was watching my phone. Should I call? No, I shouldn't. But should I? Doubt clouded my mind. Could I take care of Alice on my own?I had called James already multiple times but he still didn't answer, so it was up to me to decide. I was quite desperate as Alice didn't get the attention she needed and it was still crazy busy at work.In a couple of days, I had another court date. The last time was a one-time thing. I couldn't bring her every time with me to court. I made up my mind and called Jim."Mr. Carter speaking.""Jim it's me, Hadeon.""Hadeon? Why are you calling?""I-I screwed up Jim...""What do you mean?""I-I made a mistake that caused James to leave me and now I'm alone with Alice. I-I don't know... I don't know what to do.""I'm afraid, Hadeon, I can't follow you. What do you mean with 'don't know
Hadeon p.o.vWell, there I was, all alone with my baby girl, watching how my husband, the love of my life, drove away from us. I had screwed up big time. I felt so bad for what I did to Alice, I didn't mean for it to happen. It was so stupid of me to forget her like that. I'm a complete idiot.I walked up to my daughter and picked her up. "I'm sorry Alice. I was a bad papa to you." She looked at me and said, "daddy." Well, now I'm totally screwed. "I'm sorry princess, but daddy had to go away for a while." I apologized to her. "Let's make dinner shall we."That night I had spent it with Alice, letting her stay up a bit too late, I didn't want to be all alone. Only when it was eight in the evening she was deep asleep and she needed to go to bed. So there I was at eight-thirty in the evening, alone with my beer. I felt so, so stupid. I already missed James, I needed him. I would never, ever make a mistake like this again.I tried to call hi
Hadeon p.o.vToday I had to stay at home from work as James suddenly had to go to the company. He said something was wrong and they needed his help. I didn't quite understand as he wasn't the CEO nor the largest shareholder, but I couldn't stop him. So it was just me and Alice today.I couldn't pay her too much attention as I had a lot of work to do as well. I could only give her the necessary attention and care as I was busy working on a case. I was glad when I could put her down for a nap so I could work without any interruptions in my office.I saw that it was almost time to wake up from her nap when one of my employees called me. She didn't bring me good news. The judge had nullified our key evidence to the case. They told us it would only help speculation which wasn't good enough.We needed to have 'hard' evidence according to my employee. I was busy with making calls, looking through files, and going through everything I had s
Hadeon p.o.vIt was weird to be back again, back to my childhood home. The last time I was here was when I told my parents James was my boyfriend. They were outraged. Especially my father.He never wanted to see me again. Telling me I wasn't his son anymore, that he would disown me and that I was never welcome again in his house.My mother, on the other hand, was already thinking of ways to 'fix' my problem. Saying the church could help me, even though they weren't big on religion. Or that I should change my scenery by engaging myself more with straight couples.I already knew before I was going to tell them they wouldn't accept my sexuality. Only I did not expect it to be so incredibly harsh.After I told them I didn't speak to them for several months. It was James actually that encouraged me to seek contact for our wedding. James and I never had such a big fight from
James p.o.v"Babe, can you grab more diapers please!" I heard some cursing from upstairs but didn't pay any mind to it.Hadeon was grumpy all morning because we were going to visit his family today. I partially could understand why he wasn't excited to go to his childhood home. His history with his family was rich in constant fights, discussions, and confrontations with his parents.I had a feeling he had no happy memories of them, at all. I wished he had. The few memories I have of my family, the few happy ones, always got me through difficult times. Times when I missed them the most.But because of that strong feeling of great loss, I tried hard to convince Hadeon to find a way to make peace with his father and mother.I heard my moody husband stomping down the stairs with his arms full of the last things we needed for our short trip."Here are the diapers.""Thank you, honey." I
Hadeon p.o.vWhen I got home from work I heard a female voice coming from the living room. I hung up my coat, set my suitcase down on the floor, and made my way over to the living room. There I saw Mary and James having tea together while the little girls were playing with all the toys around them.I knew certainly then that James and I bought too many toys for our little princess. I made a mental note to not buy any new ones for the time being.When my presence became known to the people in the room all the attention was on me. "Hadeon? You are home quite early." James commented.I walked up to him and kissed his head. "Yes, and that is a problem because?""It's not a problem, I just noticed. That's all. I am glad you are home early for a change." I could hear clearly the undertone of his words. I knew he had trouble with me being home late from work since we had Alice.After I had greeted my h
Hadeon p.o.vI didn't get why James was so upset. She wasn't alone that long. He is just a neat freak and a control freak. The moment things don't go his way he gets agitated and starts yelling at people. I didn't do anything wrong. I rubbed my hands over my face. I was frustrated and I needed a drink. I opened one of my cabinets and got my whiskey and my glass out.First I needed to cool down and then talk to him. It was something I had learned when I worked on my anger issues. I would apologize and then explain the situation, if I had done that it was all up to James. If he would make up or stay mad at me.The thing that frustrated me the most was that James thought I didn't care for our daughter. I loved my princess. I would do anything for her. I just didn't see the harm in letting her be alone for a couple of minutes.I finished my drink, but I wasn't cooled down enough so I got myself another one. I needed a backup plan if he doesn'