The peeling sound of screeching tires. A loud thunk and an explosion of glass. An invisible force throwing me forward. But no control over anything, nothing to grab as my hands fly through the air. I hit a solid surface and jolted up. I gasp as I blink my eyes open. I’m in my room. I am always in my room. I can still smell burned rubber and gas though. The pungent fumes still burn in my nose. This nightmare will never go away. It’s the same thing every night. It has been for two years. I take another deep breath in, trying to clear the smell from my nose and the sight from the back of my eyelids.
My door bursts open and my best friend comes flying at me. At this point I think we should just share a room, with the amount of time he spends with me here. He says nothing, just climbs under the cushiony down blanket and wraps me in his arms, placing my head on his chest. His heartbeat and smell is comforting enough for me to fall back into a dreamless sleep.
I have had the same dream every night since the crash. I don’t know what am I supposed to do? I have been to every doctor that Aunt Beth has sent me to and nothing seems to make it better, except being near Jeremiah. It is messing with my life which is already a complete sh*tshow anyway. I don’t need any more weirdass situations. It’s also not super convenient for him either.
“Awe, sweetheart, you look tired. Another bad night?” Aunt Beth asks like she couldn’t hear me scream from across the house.
I can’t bring myself to be a moody teenager to her though, her and Uncle James have done so much for me the last couple years. They didn’t have to take me in, but when none of my other family members stepped in to claim guardianship over a fifteen year old teenager, my mom’s best friend and her husband took me in without question. She was the one who stayed with me in the hospital while I recovered and she was the one who held me when the doctors told me my parents didn’t survive. She made sure I saw the best doctors and specialists to help me process the whole situation.
“Yeah, They seem to be getting worse, but I don’t know why.” I grumble as I sit down at her massive island and she puts a plate of all my favorite breakfast foods in front of me and I just give her a big smile and dig in.
“You ready yet?” Oh the dulcet howl from my best friend comes from somewhere in the house ten minutes later. What would I do without him in my life?
“Almost. Aunt Beth is trying to gorge me on food and I can’t be rude and leave anything behind.” I say shoving a forkful of food into my mouth.
“Mom, you know she doesn’t need to eat the same amount as me, right? I’m going to have to roll her to school.” He throws my way walking towards the fridge like he isn’t going to grab a plateful of food and wolf it down.
“Did you just call me fat?!” I took a swipe at him from my seat, but he’s fast as f*ck and I missed. “I will remind you, sir, that I train just as much as you. My body just isn’t predestined to be god-like with rock solid muscles stacked on more muscles.”
“So, you’re saying I’m hot and we should go out sometime?” He leans on the doorframe of the kitchen as he slings his backpack over his shoulder while simultaneously shoveling food into his face. I can’t deny that my best friend is hot. He is one of the best looking guys I have ever seen and there are a lot of good looking guys here. I’m pretty sure it’s a genetic trait for werewolves. With his chocolate hair in a strategically messy flop on the top of his head, like he ran his fingers through it but didn’t bother to fix it. His light caramel eyes can draw you in and almost make you miss his full lips. His over six foot stature screams ‘I will keep you safe’ or ‘I will f*ck you up’ depending on who it’s directed at. But, I will never say any of that to him out loud, his ego doesn’t need the boost. But I have never felt the hormonal pull to him either. He is my brother for all intents and purposes and we are super close, but that’s it.
Copyright © 2024 by Miss L Writes and Ember Mantel Productions
“Are you kidding?! One of your Luna wannabes would slit my throat in my sleep. And now that you’re eighteen, they are so much worse.” I grimace and pretend to vomit.
“Are those girls still giving you a hard time, honey?”
“Aunt Beth, it’s fine. They would give me a hard time even if we were destined mates.” I pretend to gag again. “They don’t like me because I’m human and beneath them, but I somehow have the attention of their fearless future Alpha. Besides, no one has tried to hit me with anything in a long time. It’s just stupid girls with stupid insults.” I roll my eyes like it doesn’t bother me as I push Jeremiah’s big ass out of the house so we can head to our first day of senior year.
What I won’t tell her is that the insults have gotten worse recently. Apparently, having dead parents and being a human in a werewolf pack wasn’t enough to work with. Now, I am a sl*t who sleeps around with all of Jeremiah’s friends behind his back, even though we have never dated and never will. We have known each other from birth, literal birth. We have the same birthday and were born in the same hospital. Our mom’s had been best friends since college. They graduated together and opened a studio that taught yoga and women’s self defense. My mom took over the studio when Aunt Beth met Uncle James and became the Luna of the pack, which takes a ton of time.
Aunt Beth kept the studio for me and I work there a couple days a week. I help train and the manager is teaching me about the inner workings of the business so I can take over some day. It’s the one thing that my mom left to me that I feel the most connected to her. They started this from nothing and taught both humans and werewolves. It’s a legacy that I really want to keep going, no matter what I do with my life.
“You still plan on leaving for school next year?” Jeremiah asks, not looking at me from the driver’s seat of his muscle car. I couldn’t tell you what it is, but it’s sleek matte black, big and beefy with an engine that growls.
We have had this conversation so many times over the last year that I don’t know what else to say to him.
“Yes, Jer. I have to go. You are going to really start Alpha training and I am a human so it’s not like I am looking for a mate. I mean, it wasn’t you and I don’t know how anyone else will ever compare.” I say dramatically, putting the back of my hand on my forehead. “And right now, I don’t have any other useful purpose in the pack.”
“You know how strangep that was right? Everyone waiting to see if we were mates. I mean, don’t get me wrong, you are amazing and beautiful, but you’re my twin sister.” He shutters dramatically and I just laugh at him.
“You are such a weirdo. You ready for this year though? I mean there are a lot of expectations now. Everything is starting to feel real.”
“Ready as I’ll ever be I guess.” He shrugs. “We already have a bunch of trips planned to visit with other pack Alphas so I can start building relationships with them. At least I’m not the only new Alpha. There are two more in our alliance, which helps. I won’t be the odd man out and just treated like a stupid kid all by myself.” I laugh at him, but I get it. The visiting Alphas can be patronizing to younger wolves. It’s a hierarchy thing, but some of them, like some of our pack members, think that their species, rank and position make them automatically better and allowed to behave anyway and say anything they want with no retaliation.
We pull up to the school and into Jer’s parking spot and of course the b*tch entourage is here waiting.
“Oooooh! Your fan club is here to make sure you don’t break a nail on your way to classes.” I sing song.
“Shut up.” He growls, taking a deep breath before getting out.
These girls are ruthless in their pursuit of him and many of them are eighteen like us and know for a fact that he isn’t their mate, but they still pursue him like he’s available. I mean, he’s not a saint by any stretch of the imagination, none of his crew is. They are actually kind of manwh*res. According to Tommy, it was to practice so they could be good for their mates.
But since our birthday when he came of age and is able to sense his mate, I don’t think I have seen Jer with another girl, I don’t think his wolf will let him. They are game on for their mate and only their mate. Too bad none of the b*tch brigade got the memo.
His lack of attention brought on more rumors about him slumming around with me, but I could at least shut those down pretty fast when I reminded them that means he chose me not them. They changed tactics pretty fast.
We both got out of the car and I had to fight the crowd that surrounded him just to get by, but he has never left me hanging, no matter how mean some of these girls can be, and now is no exception. I do love that he doesn’t baby me or fight my fight for me. He knows that would be more detrimental. I can actually fight for myself and I have the attitude to match. He just keeps the trolls from getting in my way or holding me up from classes.
“Kennedy, let’s go girl. The guys are waiting.” He wraps his arm around my neck and leads me away. “What am I going to do without you here to c*ckblock for me? See, you can’t go away to college. I need you here.”
“First, that is your mate's job, so chop chop and find her already so I can pass the torch. Second, you know why I want to go. I can’t be a burden any more. I want to do right by my parents and Aunt Beth and Uncle James. I need to be able to support myself, I can’t rely on you guys forever.”
“That is a lie and you know it. You had better rely on me forever. I fully plan to rely on you, Warrior.” He tries to look stern, but his handsome face doesn’t really do the look if he isn’t actually angry. “And you know Mom is never letting you go, she’s plotting just as hard as I am to keep you here.”
Before I can reply, the rest of the guys walk up looking like a Magic Mike runway show before all the clothes come off. Not gonna lie, I might have drooled a bit, but what do you expect when all of my friends are hot as f*ck. Too bad none of them are my type, and I’m not their mate. And I have tested all the waters, except Jeremiah. It’s just an unspoken rule that none of us bring it up or discuss it at all.
Ben is our dark haired, tattooed and broody Beta. Tommy is our fun loving Delta and Jason our blonde surfer boy Gamma. They are all tall, and wide like Jer, with Adonis muscles crammed into too tight shirts. I always wonder if that’s on purpose or if they just can’t be bothered to find clothes that fit.
They all do the bro hug thing as we meet up and each one gives me a hug and kiss on the head or cheek. It’s all very public and very much on purpose after last year.
2 - Kennedy“Hey Kennedy! Looking good girl! I think you get hotter every time I see you.” “Tommy. You saw me yesterday…at training…when I kicked your ass.” I didn’t actually kick his ass. I just didn’t get beat, and gave him a run for his money.“That’s better every time too.” He closes his eyes and smiles and we all just laugh.“You are so stupid!” I say to our future Delta. “Does that line work on any girls?’“I save my best lines for you, until I find my mate of course. Then I won’t need any lines, she will love me no matter what.” He puts his hand on his heart.“Lucky girl.” I pretend to vomit on Jason, who just laughs.“You’re lucky the Moon Goddess is going to force someone to be with you forever. Otherwise, I don’t know if anyone would put up with you that long.” Ben huffs a laugh. I don’t know if I have ever seen our tough-as-nails friend really show any emotion outwardly. He’s actually a really nice guy, when you get to know him, but to the outside world he’s stern
3 - Kennedy“So, the cat’s away. What are the mice going to do?” Tommy taunts.“This mouse has some homework to do and the Beta gave me something to test this weekend so we are playing hide and seek.” They all look up at that? Shocked faces tell me I am going to have to work for my freedom.“Not a good idea, Ken. You heard Jeremiah. He’s going to lose his mind if he finds out we let you off in the woods by yourself.” Ben tries to shut the idea down before we even start.“It was your dad’s idea! Come on Ben! Please?”“Uh, no.” “Jason, help me out. It was an assignment from the Beta, you can ask him yourself.”“I can guarantee that he would not assign you something the same weekend the Alpha, Luna, Gamma, Delta and Jeremiah are all gone. Even he knows what Jeremiah will do if any of us allow that. And he will be too busy running the pack for two days to supervise. Not a chance. I love you Ken, but I like my balls more.” He laughs.“Ugh, Tommy? What do you say?”“If they a
4 - KennedyWalking into the gym and flipping on the lights I, at least, think to warm-up a little first. I crank some angry rock music, grab a speed rope and start jumping to get my blood flowing and my muscles warm, still letting the rampant negative thoughts run wild. Weak, Orphan, Alone, Replaced, Unwanted. Just a repeating loop every time the rope hit the floor a new word would pop up. Once I had a decent sweat going. I moved over to the heavy bag, checked my wrapped hands and started running through our usual hitting warm-up then I just started wailing on the bag adding in kicks and full body movements, until I couldn’t feel my limbs any more. I stopped when I couldn’t push my body any further and leaned my forehead on the bag breathing hard. My weak human self doesn’t have the same natural stamina my werewolf friends do. Another wave of irritation washes over me. Not Enough, my internal voice taunts me.Ben walks up next to me in his own workout gear and hands me a water bo
5 - KennedyOf course a text isn’t enough, Ben has to call with his response. “Are you sure? Have you talked to Jer about this. He’s going to be pissed if you leave and don’t say anything. I do like living you know.”“He doesn’t get a choice, Ben. I don’t want to be here right now and I need a place to go. If you won’t help me I will call someone else.” I’m getting angry the longer he tries to stall.“I’m on my way, just do me a favor and talk to him. You are important to him.”“Um, sure, whatever. I’ll see you in a couple minutes.”“I mean it, talk to him.”“Or what, Ben?” I’m back to being angry. Great. Adding mood swings to the list of new emotions.“I’ll make you.” He grunts and I just hang up on him too irritated for this right now. I walk my two bags downstairs and set them by the front door and grit my teeth. I need to say something to Aunt Beth or she will tear this whole pack apart looking for me. Come to think of it, I didn't see her when we got here to meet Rayna today. W
6 - KennedyMy eyes go wide. “First what?” Still dodging, I’m sure they all talk but it’s not something we talk about out loud as a group.“Yes!! I knew it! Who was your first kiss?”“Huh?!”“Don’t play dumb, any red blooded non-mated woman would be a complete moron for not taking whatever they were offering. And you are beautiful, and they have definitely noticed. Who. Was. Your. First. Kiss?”“Jason.” I covered my face. I don’t know why I was embarrassed to tell her. It was nice and he was so sweet with me and everyone was around for that one. “But just the one, during a game of spin the bottle. Not something any of us talk about really.”“What about Tommy? He doesn’t seem like the type to stop at kissing. But I also don’t get the feeling you slept with him.” I shake my head no. And she smiles like the Cheshire Cat. “Yes! How far did you let it go?”“What are you, a mind reader?” I sit there and she just looks at me expectantly. It must be the alpha blood, she’s just used to gett
7 - RykerI am so sick of all these damn meetings, but I can’t say that out loud, because this was my idea in the first place. I just didn’t expect all of these former Alphas and Betas to be whiny b*tches. They get worse every time we do this. I guess this explains why they couldn’t hold onto their packs.I am supposed to be getting ready for the new Alphas ceremony. I do not envy the three new Alphas coming up. Some of the old pompous assholes like to throw their weight around and try to make these kids bow down and convince them not to make waves, but that is the point of appointing the next Alpha, new blood, new ideas. We get better and learn from past mistakes and triumphs. Some of these guys though, they need to be put out to pasture and not even allowed a seat on the Elders council.We haven’t had new Alphas come of age in a couple years. I’m not the most recent, but not too far off. I am an exception to the rule though. My dad was injured in a huge war and even with his
8 - KennedyI’m groggy but I can tell Jeremiah is holding me, my head is tucked into his massive hard chest. Another breath, another hand squeeze. I look over and Rayna, sitting next to Jer, is looking at me with sympathy and I can feel the tears prick behind my eyes. I try to blink them away, but it’s no use. They fall in slow streams from my eyes. I squeeze them shut trying to stem the flow.“Hey, don’t fight it. Let the sadness go. It will help.” Her voice is so soothing, but I let the tears just flow.“It doesn’t make it any less embarrassing.” I sniffle and pull my hands from hers to rub them over my face.“There’s something that makes sense.” I look over and see Ben at the foot of my bed. Even better. “What happened this time? Was there something different about your dream? You yelled for all of us.” He points and I see Tommy and Jason too. “You’ve never done that before.”“Huh? I don’t know. I don’t really remember.” I lied and closed my eyes again but opened them back up qu
9 - RykerWe pull up to the gates of Alpha Edward’s pack grounds and I can already tell there is trouble. They waited for him to be at our regularly scheduled meeting to set up. I really am too tired for this, I should be heading to the new alpha meet to relieve my sister and dad, not dealing with wannabe leaders. They were only supposed to represent me for the first night. I step out of my car slowly, adjusting my shirt and buttoning my jacket, deliberately taking my time to piss off the guard they stationed. They are inconveniencing me, I have no problem returning the favor.“You are not needed. Go back to your greedy pack of assholes. Alpha Edward is too weak to protect us and we have chosen a new Alpha and he is not entertaining guests at the moment.” Well, at least he pretended to be civil. Too bad I can smell his weakness from here, he’s got balls. He probably volunteered for this post to make himself look better to whatever dipsh*t thinks he’s in charge.I continue to d
31 - GretaWalking down the hall, I hear Landon and Ryker. “Yeah, we don’t know what happened exactly. The fire was just too big and everyone was running around. Peyton and I were at training and someone came in and yelled ‘FIRE’ then all the kids went crazy. Peyton and I ran together, cause we’re neighbors but the wind was too bad and there were sparks everywhere. I got burned on the arm and she told me we can’t search anymore. We told you how we found Gabriel and Trinity. Do you think that our parents are still alive?” I finally hear a whisper of the little boy he is in the question.“I hope so buddy. But you are here now and you can stay as long as you want to. In the morning I’ll have my guys start looking into your pack’s situation, now that we have an idea of what happened. You have done a great job protecting your pack. Your parents and your alpha will be so proud.”“Speaking of the littles,” I step into Bennet’s room where they are sitting on the bed. They both look over a
30 - GretaThis little doll of a girl is wrapped in Finn’s arms like a koala. She tucks her face back under Finn’s chin so she can look at me while maintaining full contact with him. Her posture is shy, but the look in her eye is most definitely not. It is almost territorial. My wolf grumbles in my head before I remind her that this baby has been through a lot and isn’t a threat. But she knows my name. That is interesting.“Oh! I am so excited to see you all!” Kennedy gushes unable to help herself. “Are you hungry? Samuel said you hunted before you left your camp. Or are you tired? We’re going to set you up here with us tonight.”“I’m hungry!” The youngest boy says and we all laugh.“Gabriel, you’re always hungry.” The oldest girl laughs at him.“Well Gabriel, you are in luck, I just had the fridge stocked. I’m always hungry too.” Kennedy giggles, patting her stomach. “Let’s get a snack and then you can all get cleaned up and in bed. Sound good?” She reaches her hand out to him. H
29 - FinnI give her fingers a squeeze and shift to follow Landon and Gabriel to get water. I lose count of how many trips we make, but Landon is smart and kept them close to a stream so it wasn’t terrible. Seth and Sameul talk the kids through what they do to process the deer and how we use everything. Nothing goes to waste. We eat and use the deer skin to hold what we don’t consume. Trinity doesn’t leave my side and only breaks contact to eat. Her cute little hand is wrapped around my pinky finger and her warm body is pressed up into my side.All the kids are fascinated with the whole food prep process, asking question after question to Seth as he cooks and hands off finished pieces of meat. After, we all wash off in the stream and head back to sit around the fire, talking comfortably. “You know you remind me of a friend of mine.” I tell Trinity.“I do? Who?” She has gotten more confident around us, but her voice is still strong, but shy.“Her name is Greta and your hair is almos
28 - FinnHe pads over to the opening and crawls in. I can hear muffled talking, but I don’t try to listen in. If she’s younger than Gabriel, she’s just a baby and I have no idea where her mind might be at. Other than my friends we never came across too many pups in our journey and I always thought that was because situations like Sammmy’s and mine were a fluke. But after seeing these kids, I wonder if it’s because they didn’t survive long enough to get help.I hear a little squeak behind me as Gabriel sits next to me. When I turn he shrugs his shoulders. I guess that means I’m up. I chance a slight look and my breath catches. This tiny little thing is huddled in a ball next to the opening, staring right back at me. Her body language says she’s afraid, but her eyes tell me a different story. She has piercing green eyes that are hard and fierce. Her look is almost a dare to go over there and see what she’ll do to me.I keep my ass on the ground and lift my hand in a wave. “Hi.” I say
27 - FinnI hear a grumbled ‘jackass’ from one of them. I try to fight a smile, kind of. “The Luna said you need help, what can I do? The Alpha is already planning how to remove my head from my body for leaving my partner alone to defend the Luna…”“WHAT!?! Why in the hell would you leave her?” The bulkier of the two warriors steps towards me.I throw my hands up. “Because SHE had a pregnant tantrum about rescuing these kids! I chose to piss off the lesser of the two evils! Have either of you dealt with a pregnant she wolf?” Both males stop in their tracks and share a look before laughing. “Wait. What’d I miss?”“I take it you don’t have kids?” Lean man asks.“No?” “The Luna is intense on her own, the hormones are making it tenfold. The name’s Samuel.” The larger built warrior says extending his hand to me. I shake it, a little confused. “Finn, nice to meet you I guess.” That’s it? All I had to do was tell them their Luna scared the crap out of me and they decide I’m not a threat?
26 - FinnWe can’t catch a break. Every time I get Greta to talk to me about this whole mate thing, something interrupts. Neither of us is stupid enough to go against our very pregnant luna though.“What’s up Boss lady?” Greta puffs out. Even she isn’t immune to these f*cking stairs.“Samuel and Seth found some abandoned pups on the border.” She screeches.“I don’t understand.” I step forward, but stay behind Greta’s shoulder. I haven’t been around many pregnant she-wolves, but I have heard they can go from sweet to violent in a blink and Kennedy is still getting used to the heightened emotions of her wolf. She’s less likely to hurt Greta in this situation.“They need your help! What’s not to understand?!” She’s frantically running her fingers through her hair, pacing and I am at a loss. I look sideways at my mate. Greta’s glassy eyed, meaning she’s hopefully getting some insight from the alpha.“Luna…LUNA!” She finally looks at me. “Can you give me more details? Are they being c
25 - FinnDeal. That’s all we were told, to deal. I am now stuck here, for who knows how long with her. I can’t deal witht this right now, I have to get out of here.“I’m going to go look around.” I drop my bag and scurry to the door.“Finn, wait..”I don’t hear anything else she says as I spring like a coward down the hall, down the stairs, past a confused Kennedy and out to the massive patio. I’m panting, my lungs won’t take in air. I can’t do this. I can’t be around her. Her scent in the car was difficult enough to deal with. I am the most relaxed and at the same time the most tense than I have been in weeks.“You need to calm down. This is a good thing.”“How can it be a good thing?! I was just getting used to not being around her.”“You get another shot, that’s why it’s a good thing!”“I don’t want it. She doesn’t want me. I am a rogue with nothing. Just let me reject her and we can move on. The rest of our group is settled and Ryker is going to make them all pack soon.”“NO!
24 - FinnI slide out of the SUV looking around. This feels like a trap, and yet none of the usual alarms are going off in my head. My wolf and I have established a decent radar for bad situations. Avoiding them is our top priority. I’m not sure what it is about Kennedy and Ryker, but I have not had one single instance of distrust with either of them the entire time we have been in the Dark Moon pack.“Greta! Finn!” I whip around to see Kennedy at the top of a ridiculously tall staircase. “Well, don’t just stand there, come on!” She waves us up excitedly.It’s almost strange to have someone excited to see me. Nan was it, as far as I can remember, other than the pups at Dark Moon. But, they are excited to see most people, so they don’t really count. I always have Sammy and some of the other guys. We fight side by side and hope each one makes it out alive. We have had to leave guys behind and move forward, move on to the next location. I couldn’t tell you where we laid those people to
23 - GretaI sit and stare at the door for a long while. There’s no sound on the other side. He’s not showering or anything, just waiting for me to leave. I should feel relieved. He told me to go and I wish I could make my body do just that, but I’m locked here in place, my wolf is willing him to come out. His wolf is blocking her and I can feel her heartbreak. Something’s changed and she’s hurting. Add it to the list of things for me to feel guilty about.I stand, frustrated, and take a deep breath of his lingering scent, then get an idea. I run my hands on the pillows and blankets. Anything soft in this room I touch. At the very least, maybe he will sleep okay tonight. I need to talk to Kennedy, this is something I don’t know how to navigate. I still don’t want a mate. It’s not fair to Finn that I am broken and can’t be fixed. I don’t like the idea of him hurting over it either._It has been weeks and FInn is nowhere in sight. I can feel him when he’s near, but he is avoiding m